Chapter 10

[Scene: The Kitchen – Chaos Incoming]
Seren drags Kieran to the kitchen, exhausted from their previous battle. Rina and Lena follow, both way too entertained.
Seren wagner (fl)
Seren wagner (fl)
(gesturing at the fridge) Okay, we’re going to teach you how to use modern appliances. This is a fridge.
Kieran Valtor (ml)
Kieran Valtor (ml)
(narrowing his eyes) …It hums. It is alive? 🤨
Seren wagner (fl)
Seren wagner (fl)
No, it just keeps food cold.
Kieran Valtor (ml)
Kieran Valtor (ml)
(opens the fridge, immediately jumps back and reaches for a sword that isn’t there) By the gods, there is ICE inside!
Rina Wagner (fl sis)
Rina Wagner (fl sis)
(dying laughing) Oh my god, he thinks it’s a demon.
Kieran Valtor (ml)
Kieran Valtor (ml)
(glaring at the fridge suspiciously) I do not trust it.
..
[Enter: The Microwave. The Real Enemy.]
Seren wagner (fl)
Seren wagner (fl)
(pointing at the microwave) This is a microwave. It heats food.
Kieran Valtor (ml)
Kieran Valtor (ml)
(crossing his arms) You lie. Fire heats food.
Seren wagner (fl)
Seren wagner (fl)
(dead inside) This also heats food. Without fire.
Seren places a bowl of food inside and presses a button.
BEEP. HUMMMMM.
Kieran Valtor (ml)
Kieran Valtor (ml)
(jumping back, eyes glowing with battle instincts) WITCHCRAFT.
Kieran Valtor (ml)
Kieran Valtor (ml)
(pointing at the microwave, horrified) You put cold food inside, and it whispers to itself… then it becomes warm?!
lena warner (fl bff)
lena warner (fl bff)
(wheezing) Not the ‘whispers to itself’—I CAN’T.
Kieran Valtor (ml)
Kieran Valtor (ml)
(pulling out a butter knife like it’s a weapon) I WILL SLAY THIS CURSED BOX.
Rina Wagner (fl sis)
Rina Wagner (fl sis)
(literally rolling on the floor laughing) HE’S ABOUT TO FIGHT A MICROWAVE.
Seren wagner (fl)
Seren wagner (fl)
(grabbing the knife before he commits a crime against technology) PUT THAT DOWN. You cannot duel a microwave, you absolute medieval gremlin.
DING! The microwave finishes.
Kieran Valtor (ml)
Kieran Valtor (ml)
(staring at it like it just spoke in tongues) …It calls for me.
Seren wagner (fl)
Seren wagner (fl)
No. No, it does not.
Kieran Valtor (ml)
Kieran Valtor (ml)
(slowly stepping forward, squinting at the food inside) …Is it safe?
lena warner (fl bff)
lena warner (fl bff)
Only one way to find out.
Seren hands Kieran a bowl of steaming noodles. He eyes it cautiously before taking a bite.
Kieran Valtor (ml)
Kieran Valtor (ml)
(pauses, chewing, eyes widening slightly)…This is…
Seren wagner (fl)
Seren wagner (fl)
This is…?
Kieran Valtor (ml)
Kieran Valtor (ml)
…Acceptable
Rina Wagner (fl sis)
Rina Wagner (fl sis)
(mock gasping) OH MY GOD. A COMPLIMENT?
Seren wagner (fl)
Seren wagner (fl)
(narrowing her eyes) Wait. How do you know how to use chopsticks?
Kieran Valtor (ml)
Kieran Valtor (ml)
(smirking) A warrior must always be adaptable
lena warner (fl bff)
lena warner (fl bff)
No, because why is he casually flexing?
Kieran Valtor (ml)
Kieran Valtor (ml)
(pointing at the microwave again, suddenly serious) …But this? This I do not trust.
Seren wagner (fl)
Seren wagner (fl)
I hate it here.
--

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