Substitute Teacher

[Henry Hart & Captain Man]

It all just kinda happened

My dad was an irresponsible scientist

I needed an after school job

And by accident, he made me indestructible (y-aaaaaah!!)

I went to this crazy store, and met a pretty interesting guy

(I'm gonna blow your mind)

Now I protect the good citizens of Swellview

Who call me (And he turned out to be...)

You know the name

Captain Man!

That's right Henry!

In time I realized being a superhero is a lot to handle alone

He wanted some help

I needed a sidekick

I Henry Hart

Pledge to never ever ever tell anyone

That I am Captain Man's secret sidekick

It is done

Now we blow bubbles

And fight crime

Feels gooood!

[Instrumental Theme Plays]

[Captain Man & Kid Danger]

Call it

Up the tuuuuube!

Ah my boot!

Ha!

[Theme Song End]

Charlotte: Hey,what's up Henry?

Henry: Same old thing

[locker beeps]

[locker honks]

Charlotte: Oh,come on

[locker honks]

Charlotte: Stupid thing

[locker beeps]

Charlotte: Show off. Ugh

Henry: Hey char,can I burrow your chemistry notes?

[locker honks]

Charlotte: Ugh! Why?

Henry: Okay. I'll borrow Jasper's

Charlotte: My lock is broken again. Ugh. Dang public schools. Hey,will you...

Henry: What?

Charlotte: Use your Whiz-Watch to open the lock

Henry: No. What if someone sees?

Charlotte: I'll create a distraction

Henry: You know I'm not supposed to-

[screams]

-What? What's wrong?

[chatter]

Charlotte: Okay,I'm fine now

Charlotte: Thank you

Henry: Yep

Piper: Henry! Henry,I am gonna kill you!

Henry: Hey,you're not supposed to be in the middle school hallway

Piper: Where's my phone?

Henry: Wh--I don't know where your phone is

Oliver: Hey Henry,quick question

Piper: Get out of here!

[whimpers]

Henry: Look,Piper,I don't have your phone,okay? So you just need to--Oh. I must've picked it up by mistake

Piper: Dang it

Henry: What?

Piper: You butt dialed Jana Tetrazzini

Henry: So?

Piper: I hate Jana Tetrazzini

Henry: Then why do you keep her number in your phone?

Piper: Because if she calls me,I need to know it's her so I can ignore her

Henry: Love you

Piper: Who cares?

Jasper: And this is my favorite hallway

Ortho: It's very nice

Jasper: And those are my friends. Henry,Charlotte

Henry: Hey,man

Jasper: This is Ortho. He's new here

Henry: Ah. Hey

Charlotte: What's up?

Jasper: Doesn't Ortho have thick hair?

Charlotte: Thick

Henry: Sure

Ortho: I've asked you to stop doing that

Henry: So,how do you like our school so far?

Ortho: It's nice. Hey,can you tell about the school's main water supply?

Charlotte: Our water supply?

Ortho: Yes. You know,the water that all the teachers and students here drink

Henry: Why do you want to know about that?

Ortho: I have reasons

Jasper: Sorry,Ortho. They don't really tell us about our water supply

Ortho: I see. Hey,does this school have security cameras?

Henry: Security cameras?

Ortho: Yes. Where are your cameras?

Henry: There might be some outside

Charlotte: I don't think we have security cameras here in the hallways

Ortho: That's good news

Jasper: Hey,Ortho,you want to see my locker?

Ortho: Yes,immediately

[locker beeps]

Jasper: This is where I keep my books,my lunch. And this is Captain Man. He came to my birthday party

Ortho: Oh,I know all about Captain Man. And one day,hopefully,my father will take care of him

Henry: What do you mean by that?

Ortho: Take care of Captain Man how?

Ortho: I shouldn't say. We're still in the planning phase

Jasper: Isn't he neat?

[theme music playing]

Gooch: Oh,yes. Oh,you're a nice thing

Ray: Gooch! What happened? Why did you send me an emergency signal?

Gooch: Look. That's a garbage juicer

Ray: A garbage juicer?

Gooch: It juices garbage

Ray: Gooch,I was busy downstairs researching criminals

Gooch: Watch. I just dump  the garbe into the thingy

Ray: Gooch...

Gooch: Now,observe. You see? The garbage is gone. It's all in the juice

Ray: Can I go back downstairs now?

Henry: Ray,we got to talk to you

Charlotte: This is important

Henry: There's a creepy new kid at our school

Ray: Ugh,can we talk about it downstairs? Gooch's juice smells

Henry: Okay

Charlotte: I'm coming too

Gooch: Good God,that's a band-dude

Ray: Why do you think this Ortho kid is up to something?

Henry: Well,he was asking about the school's water supply

Charlotte: And he wanted to know about the security cameras and--

[elevator buzzes]

[screaming]

Ray: I wonder why he was asking about those things? Guys? Oh,stop screaming

Charlotte: Can't that elevator be adjusted?

Ray: Why do you say this Ortho kid is creepy?

Henry: Because he says weird stuff. And he's got this crazy,psycho look in his eye

Ray: You got a pic?

Charlotte & Henry: Uh...

Charlotte: Jasper's Twitflash

Henry: Oh,yeah. Jasper posted a pic of him and Ortho on his Twitflash

Ray: Then I say we look at Jasper's Twitflash

Henry: Bucket. Bucket. Selfie with bucket. Bucket. Bucket. Ah. That's Ortho right there

Ray: Hmm. He's a boy,all right

Charlotte: A boy that's up to no good

Ray: Oh,give him a break

Henry & Charlotte: What?

Ray: The kid's new to your school,he's probably just a little awkward. Let's not make mumps out of marshmallows

Henry: He also threatened you

Ray: Me? What'd that little marsh mump say?

Charlotte: That his father was going to "take care" of you

Ray: Oh,did he? Well,we'll just see about...Wait. He said his father was going to take care of me?

Henry: Yep

Charlotte: Sure did

Ray: Put that kid's pic back up on the monitor and zoom in. That hair. You guys ever heard of Drill Finger?

Charlotte: Those little pickles?

Henry: I think those are dill fingers

Charlotte: I love dill fingers

Ray: This is not about pickles. I'm talking about a dentist

Henry: Named Drill Finger?

Ray: Yeah. He used to be a dentist before he turned to a life of crime. Three years ago he kidnapped the mayor of Swellview and removed all his teeth,which left him toothless

Henry: That's why he only eats soup

Ray: Exactly

Charlotte: And what happened to Drill Finger?

Ray: I captured him and took him to jail. But he was released three weeks ago. That's Drill Finger

Henry: Does he always wear a mask?

Ray: Yeah,but look at his hair

Charlotte: Just like Ortho's

Ray: Gooch

Gooch: (on computer) Hey,I can't talk now. I'm on the phone with my nephew,Benji. He has the chicken pox

Ray: Do you remember when I put Drill Finger in jail?

Gooch: (on computer) Of course

Ray: What were his exact words as they took him away?

Gooch: (on computer) He said,"As soon as I get out of here,I'm going to take care of Captain Man"

Ray: That's what I thought

Gooch: (on computer) Great. I got to go

Henry: So,Ortho is the son of Drill Finger

Charlotte: I knew it. I knew it. I knew that boy was evil. I knew it

Henry: Yeah,but did you know it?

Charlotte: I did

Ray: But what are they up to?

[sighs]

Ray: Well,I guess I'm not going to figure it out just by wearing a loud shirt and stroking my chin

Charlotte: What do we do?

Ray: I'm going to do a little spying on your new classmate,Ortho. I'm going to have to figure out a way into your school,maybe as a substitute teacher

Charlotte: Well,you can't just wait until one of our teachers gets sick

Ray: Hmm. Good point. I'll have to think of a plan

Henry: Try stroking your chin

Ray: There. That's one of Henry's teachers,Miss Shapen

Gooch: Let's do this

Benji: My chicken pox itch

Gooch: Benji,just remember,never tell anyone about this

Benji: Okay,Uncle Gooch

Ray: Now!

Gooch: Tronya!

Sharona: What? Hey! Stop! Ah! Oh! What is going on?

[screaming]

[chatter]

Jasper: Hey,guys! Hey,guys!

Henry: Hold on a second. Hey,guys

[silence]

Jasper: Principal says Miss Shapen has chicken pox

Henry: All right,free day

[cheering]

Jasper: No,no,no. No. He said we're getting a substitute

[groaning]

Charlotte: You don't think Ray...

Henry: Nah,he wouldn't

Ray: (speaking with accent) Hello,children. Everyone,please take your seats. It seems your regular teacher has caught the pox of a chicken. Nasty red bumpies all over. But not to worry,I am your substitute,Mr. Gelding

Henry: Ray,are you kidding me?

Ray: Shh,I know what I'm doing

Henry: This is not going to work

Ray: It might work if you...

Henry: You look ridiculous

Ray: ...Just sit down 

Henry: Can you talk to me about this?

Ray: No,I can't talk to you about this. Sit down and trust me

[Henry protests]

Ray: (with accent) Sit down,boy!

Henry: Yes,Mr. Gelding

Ray: (with accent) Now,then,let's have a roll call. We'll start with first names that  begin with the letter "O"

Oliver: My name is Oliver

Ray: (with accent) Shut up,Oliver. Where's,uh,where's Ortho? Hello,Ortho. Now then,who can tell me about the isosceles triangle?

Jasper: Sir? This is a history class

Ray: Who can tell about the history of the isosceles triangle? Ortho,what do you know?

Ortho: I...I'm new

Henry: Excuse me,Mr. Gelding. Can I please talk to you out in the hall?

Ray: (with accent) I'm in the middle of a lesson

Henry: I have a question about my personal hygiene

Ray: (with accent) To the hall we go

Jasper: Hey,I have lots of questions about my hygiene

Henry: What are you doing? Why are you in my school?

Ray: (with accent) I'm spying on Ortho

Henry: Will you stop with the accent?

Ray: (speaking normally) I'm spying on Ortho

Henry: Well,what'd you do with our regular teacher?

Ray: I gave her a disease

Henry: Oh my god

Ray: Just chicken pox

Henry: That's the worst kind of pox

Ray: What about tuna pox?

Henry: There's no such thing as tuna pox

Ray: Look,you and Charlotte were the ones that said Ortho's up to no good

Henry: I know--

Ray: We already know his dad is Drill Finger. Now we just need to figure out what they're planning

Charlotte: You guys,Jasper keeps asking me questions about his personal hygiene

Henry: So?

Charlotte: So you better get back to class before I tell him things he does not want to know

Ray: Okay. You clear on the plan?

Henry: No

Ray: Let's go

Jasper: I just want to know if I should use different soaps for different parts of me

Charlotte: Shh

Ray: (speaking with accent) Now,history is filled with stories of evil nasty people. Who can name some?

Jasper: Ooh. Genghis Khan

Ray: (with accent) Yes

Oliver: Voldemort

Ray: (with accent) Good one

Charlotte: Big Bird

Ray: (with accent) Absolutely. Now...Who can name some other evil people? Ortho?

Ortho: Um...

Ray: (with accent) Oh,think,Ortho. Surely you must know someone with evil intentions

Henry: Like maybe someone planning to sabotage this school?

Charlotte: Yeah,Ortho

Ortho: I--I don't understand

Ray: What are your plans?

Ortho: After class I plan to eat a Turkey wrap

Charlotte: Ah. Ha

Ray: (with accent) You,student,examine Ortho's Turkey wrap

Jasper: What is going on?

Henry: Wrap's clean

Ray: (with accent) Now,students,to really know history,we must first learn your history. Therefore,tomorrow shall be Bring Your Father to Class day

Jasper: All our fathers?

Ray: (with accent) No,let's just start with one father

Oliver: My father lives in our basement

Ray: (with accent) Put your hands over your face. Ortho. You bring your father to class tomorrow

Ortho: Okay

Jasper: Look,I put your wrap back together

Oliver: I can't breathe

Jasper: Hey,Ortho

Ortho: Hi

Jasper: Sorry our teacher was being so weird to you

Ortho: Ah,it's okay. I just wish that your friend hadn't mutilated my Turkey wrap

Jasper: Yeah...Oh! I got you a present. It's a mini bucket

Ortho: Thanks. 

Jasper: You can keep anything in there,paper clips,buttons,corn

Ortho: Cool. I've always wanted to eat corn out of a small bucket

Jasper: Who hasn't?

[phone ringing]

Ortho: Hello,father. Did you get the message? Right. You need to be at school tomorrow. Yes. Afterwards,we can discuss the planning phase

Jasper: Look

[screams]

Charlotte: Don't do that

[chatter]

[bell rings]

Ray: (speaking with accent) All right,lads and loonies. Rumps in chairs

-Hello. Is this...Oh,hi,Ortho

Ortho: Hello,father

Ray: (speaking normally) Well,if it isn't Ortho's daddy

Charlotte: Accent

Ray: (with accent) If it isn't Ortho's daddy

-Yeah. Sorry I'm a little late. I had some things to do

Henry: What kind of things?

Charlotte: Yeah,what things?

-Just some work stuff. So I was told it's bring Your Father to Class day

Ray: (with accent) That's right

-Okay...So,now what?

Ray: (with accent) Maybe you could tell the children about the type of work you do and--

Ortho: Father!

Ray: (with accent) Oh,bad luck. It appears that Ortho's father is having a medical episode

Ortho: No,I think you did something to him. I'm calling my mom and then you'll be in big--

Henry: Uh-oh,there goes Ortho

Ray: Good heavens...the medical problems must be genetic

Charlotte: We should take them to the school nurse

Ray: (with accent) Good idea. Let's hurry up,shall we?

Henry: Help me get Ortho

Ray: (with accent) Excuse me. Terribly sorry

Ortho: Where are we?

-I don't know,son

Ray/Captain Man & Henry/Kid Danger: Well...Well

Ray/Captain Man: We only do three Wells

Henry/Kid Danger: Sorry

Charlotte: So,mister. Are you ready to admit that you're Drill Finger?

Ortho: What?

-Who's Drill Finger?

Charlotte: You know you're Drill Finger

Ray/Captain Man: You're a psychotic,evil dentist

Henry/Kid Danger: And now it's your turn to get drilled

Ray/Captain Man: What does that mean?

Henry/Kid Danger: I don't know,man

-I'm not a dentist. I don't even floss

[load beeping]

Ray/Captain Man: Just a second

Ray/Captain Man: What,Gooch? I'm busy with Drill Finger

Gooch: (on computer) No you're not

Ray/Captain Man: Huh?

Gooch: (on computer) Drill Finger was just spotted in Nebraska

Henry/Kid Danger: Nebraska?

Gooch: (on computer) Affirmative. He put four megatons of sugar into the water supply

Henry/Kid Danger: Situation?

Gooch: (on computer) Water very sweet. Teeth in danger

Ray/Captain Man: Understood

Henry/Kid Danger: What do we do?

Ray/Captain Man: Nothing. We only protect Swellview. Nebraska,not our problem

Henry/Kid Danger: Right

Charlotte: But you guys...if the real Drill Finger is in Nebraska,who's that guy?

Ortho: He's my dad,you dip twits

Henry/Kid Danger: But...But why'd you want to know where our school's water supply was?

Ortho: Because my uncle sells water filters for schools and small businesses

Ray/Captain Man,Henry/Kid Danger,Charlotte & Melody: Oh

Charlotte: Okay,but why did you ask about our school's security cameras?

-Because at Ortho's last school the security cameras caught him picking his nose

Ray/Captain Man,Henry/Kid Danger,Charlotte & Melody: Oh

Ortho: After that,some of the other kids called me "booger boy"

[laughing]

Ray/Captain Man: Kids can be cruel

Henry/Kid Danger: Okay,wait. Then why did you say your dad was going to "take care" of Captain Man?

Charlotte & Melody: Yeah

Ray/Captain Man: Yeah

Ortho: Because my father owns a chain of retirement homes for old people

-And I'm building a new one here in Swellview

Ortho: It's still in the planning phase

-And when Captain Man gets old,I hoped I could take care of him...To thank him for being such a wonderful superhero

[chuckles]

Ray/Captain Man: Will you excuse us for just one second? We'll be right back

Ray/Captain Man: Okay,we screwed up bad

Henry/Kid Danger: I better not get in trouble

Ray/Captain Man: Let's just calm down

Charlotte: Hey. Just know I’m are not going to jail for the two of you

Ray/Captain Man & Henry/Kid Danger: Shh

Ray/Captain Man: Hey. So,good news

Ortho: What?

Ray/Captain Man: We've clearly made a mistake here

Henry/Kid Danger: So we're going to let you both go

Ray/Captain Man: As long as you promise not to mention all this to anyone

Ortho: Are you nuts?

-As soon as we get out of here,we're going right to the police

Ray/Captain Man: Well,in that case...

Henry/Kid Danger: What'd you do that for?

Ray/Captain Man: Just help me get them down

Charlotte: Aw,man

Charlotte: Will you guys hurry up?

Henry/Kid Danger: What about when they wake up? They're going to get us in trouble

Ray/Captain Man: Not if they don't remember anything that happened

[whooshing]

Ray/Captain Man: There

Henry/Kid Danger: Now they won't remember anything?

Ray/Captain Man: Not even where they live

Henry/Kid Danger & Melody: Awesome

Charlotte: They're waking up

Ray/Captain Man: Run!

[car engine starts]

[car tires squealing]

-Who are you?

Ortho: I think I'm...Booger boy

Episode End Please Like Subcribe And Comment

See Ya In The Next Episode

***Download NovelToon to enjoy a better reading experience!***