Episode 7

The warm, sweet brew slid down my throat warming my chest. The weather had turned nippy and I think it was perfect, especially since I wasn't appropriately dressed, absurd. The first time I had tried doing some Dalgona coffee, I felt it should be change into Milos, so I did it. Others argued that it should be coffee but whatever it was, Milo took me back to my childhood days in Manila.

I recalled having live close to the Malls in Makati, and riding a jeepney just to go to school. I stayed with my grandmother in a small two bedroom apartment. The bathrooms were without a bathtub so when we showered, everything go wet. The only view we had was just simply the buildings that sorrounding us and when the winds changed, the flat was consumed with the stench of the fish market behind our apartment.

In the afternoons, the commoners used to wheel a couple of rides over close to our apartment. There was a ferris wheel and the other was a ride that rotated too, but horizontally. The carriages on both were rickety, but still amused all the neighborhood children. The Ferris wheel was my favourite and I remembered thinking it was humungous. The fare for each ride was relatively cheap but then again, money was a big deal to a child in those days.

On one occasion, my mother had stepped out and I was desperate to ride the wheel. My Grandmother had refused to give me the money and decided to turn in for her usual afternoon nap. Still, I was adamant about riding the Ferris wheel. Propping myself up on a stool in the minute kitchen, I reached into one of the higher cupboards and pulled out a packet of Payless noodles. Sneaking out of the flat, I ventured down to one of the food venders close to the building. It wasn't much of grocery store; in fact it was a small green wooden shed with a door and a cut out window in front. Raising myself on tiptoes abd after steadying myself on the countertop, I attempted to get the owner's attention.

With oiled hair and a worn blue shirt, he leaned closer into me and nodded his head upwards in a gesture to ask me what I wanted. I handed him the packet of flavoured noodles and asked him for my money back. He closely examined the packet for a few seconds and handed it back to me, saying that I hadn't purchased it from him. I insisted that I had. I was going to have my Ferris wheel ride by any means. Once again, he leaned in only to tell me that he didn't sell that particular flavour I was attempting to obtain a refund on. After a few more minutes of fruitless bickering, he was victorious and I walked back home. With my head down and shoulder slumped, I plodded past the Ferris wheel ride with the packet of noodles in my hand and continued onward to my building.

Whenever I return to Manila and walk past probably the very same rainbow coloured Ferris wheel, I realise how little I must have been at that age since the wheel was fairly small. My biggest problem then was getting 50 pesos to indulge in the highlight of my day. Life was so much simpler back then. As a child, the concerns that dominate our life are so insignificant and if I knew then what I know now, I'd have on that childhood a little longer.

The breeze knocked the paper cup over, spilling the remaining Dalgona coffee. The drops raced towards the edge of the uneven table until a sudden gust of wind swerved them sideways. As I studied the drops inching towards the edge of the metallic table top, I thought to myself, Nature often send some form of resistance when we reach for our goal. It's ironic how we find meaning in the most insignificant facets in life.

Almost three weeks had passed and I felt a brief vacation was on the card, especially with the cold weather coming in. Perhaps a trip to cousin Roxanne, would do the trick. Friends were constantly attempting to introduce me to single women; an act of kindness which was becoming increasingly irritating. But, the healing was gradually showing the effect. My plan was working and would continue to do so as long I adhered to its rules. The last thing I needed was diversions.

Suddenly a scent wafted past me. It was Sophia's perfume. I turned around immediately. In that split second of the turn, a million thoughts crossed my mind, but the most prominent one was that she had found me and wanted forgiveness. She had come back because she wanted to be with me. My heart quickened instantly. In the next second, I discovered that no one was behind me. My eyes kept darting around, searching, hoping that she was there but I knew better.

Leaning back into my chair, the excitement wore off as quickly as it had risen. Memories began to flood my mind as my pulse calmed. Sophia was still a part of me and although things were gradually improving, it would take a long time to flush her out. We had something magical and as much as I hated to admit it, I did love her.

Letting out a sigh, I dropped my head. The loneliness and grief enveloped me once again, but it wasn't new anymore. I stood up and dropped the cup in the trash. I looked around behind me once more and although I hoped otherwise, I knew she wasn't there. Putting my hands in my pockets, I began my walk going somewhere. Looking down I noticed the glimmer of the million shards of glass embedded in the New York pavement.

"I need to get out of here," I murmured under my breathe.

***Download NovelToon to enjoy a better reading experience!***