I Am the Fake Saintess, and the Gods Are Obsessed With Me

I Am the Fake Saintess, and the Gods Are Obsessed With Me

This is not my life

lina (fl) Fake saintess
lina (fl) Fake saintess
( wakes up) ugh... my head, that was the weirdest dream ever.
lina (fl) Fake saintess
lina (fl) Fake saintess
(ooks around) ... Wait. This isn't my room.
lina (fl) Fake saintess
lina (fl) Fake saintess
(Sees the lavish, medieval-style bedroom with golden chandeliers, an ornate canopy bed, and luxurious furniture) Okay, who broke into my house and redecorated it like a medieval fantasy novel set ?!
System
System
[Ding ! You have been transported into the novel The Saintess and the gods' obsession.]
lina (fl) Fake saintess
lina (fl) Fake saintess
... what.
System
System
[You have replaced the Lina Euphoria, the fake saintess of light.]
lina (fl) Fake saintess
lina (fl) Fake saintess
(staring at the ceiling) What ?! No, no, no. Are you tellIng me i am in some cheesy romance novel? Where Is the dragon ? Where is the sword fight ? This isn’t what i signed up for!
System
System
[Correct. You are now the fake saintess.]
lina (fl) Fake saintess
lina (fl) Fake saintess
Fake? Fake?! Are you kidding me? I am fake everything in this situation. I don't even know how to summon a magical weapon! What am I supposed to do here, say a prayer, and hope for the best?
System
System
[You must fulfil your role as the fake saintess. Your actions may change the course of the story.]
lina (fl) Fake saintess
lina (fl) Fake saintess
(Shakes head) I didn't ask for this. I just want to go back to my comfy bed and scroll through memes.
[Door opens suddenly, revealing a tall man in white robes with golden accents.]
Edward ( High priest)
Edward ( High priest)
(Steps in, his voice smooth and authoritive) "Saintess, you have awakened. The gods are waiting for you. "
lina (fl) Fake saintess
lina (fl) Fake saintess
( Eyes twitching) Oh. Oh, no, you have to be kidding me.
lina (fl) Fake saintess
lina (fl) Fake saintess
(Looks the man up and down) Is this one of those guys who is way serious to have fun?
Edward ( High priest)
Edward ( High priest)
(Bows deeply, voice calm but reverent) " I am high priest Edward, Saintess. It is an honor to finally meet you."
lina (fl) Fake saintess
lina (fl) Fake saintess
(Squints) ... You're the priest ? Seriously ? You're the one who has to greet me on a full on rope like it's the red carpet ?
Edward ( High priest)
Edward ( High priest)
( Nervously but still formal ) " Saintess, is something wrong ?"
lina (fl) Fake saintess
lina (fl) Fake saintess
( Claps hands together) " Okey , deep breath. Let's take this one step at a time , Edward. So I am the Saintess of Light , right."
Edward ( High priest)
Edward ( High priest)
( Firm but with a hint of patience) "Yes, you have been chosen by the gods."
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