Marry Me If You Can [1]

The curtains parting to reveal Natalie in a wedding dress. Wow, they are really taking this too far.

Shot of Mom sitting on the couch of a bridal salon. Natalie thinks about how Mom called her name like a flower. And Mom sweetly says, “Natalie”.

[ Marry Me If You Can ]

Mom is hard at work, scrubbing out the refrigerator. It already looks spotless, but she’s scrubbing just the same. She pauses as she thinks of Cairo yelling at her that he’s not okay with what they’ve done and how Natalie can never be alone! Mom starts scrubbing more furiously. Grandma comes up and asks if Mom is okay. Mom pauses her scrubbing. Grandma tells her that she’ll make herself sick. Did something happen that made her upset? Mom finally replies that she thinks that she lost… That Cairo is serious about Natalie. Grandma gives her an ‘I told you so’ and asks what she plans on doing now. Mom dejectedly says she can’t do anything else but let them marry. Grandma really likes that idea. Mom adds to herself, “if it can be done.”

Phone rings, waking Natalie, or rather half-waking Natalie. This does not look like her apartment. Natalie mumbles a ‘hello.’ She answers that it is Natalie and asks who it is… it’s Mom. Mom? She answered Cairo’s phone! Mom is smiling as she says that she called Cairo's cell and since Natalie answered, she must be with him. Mom doesn’t seem the least bit upset. Why isn't she upset? Mom says that she’s right downstairs and will be right in. Natalie tries to sound happy as she responds, but Mom has hung up the phone. Natalie wonders why she’s slept in Cairo’s bed. Aw, he moved her in there so she would be comfortable. And so she wouldn’t spend the night snuggling with Rocco. Heh.

Out on the couch – sorry, had to pause because it’s really funny – Cairo is sleeping. Rocco is sleeping next to him, with his leg wrapped over Cairo, and they are sharing a blanket. Probably not what Cairo planned when he moved Natalie. And from the smile on Cairo’s face, he’s probably dreaming that the embrace is by Natalie. Natalie rushes out of the bedroom and stares with a disgusted, horrified look on her face at the two sharing the couch. It gives her the willies, especially when Rocco snuggles Cairo a little closer. She cautiously walks over and starts poking Cairo to wake him. No response. Pokes Rocco. No response.

Natalie shakes both of them and Cairo wakes up first. He is horrified to see a man’s arm draped on him and shoves Rocco off the couch in his hurry to sit up. And let the yelling begin! Cairo moans, “Not again!” and Natalie has to wonder what he means by “again.” We know it’s because Rocco doesn’t have any problem platonically sharing a bed with Cairo, for warmth’s sake. Like Cairo’s his real Bro. Cairo covers his chest like he’s been violated. Rocco looks at Cairo and says, “It was you?” Natalie just looks at her boyfriends like they are weird. Rocco looks up at Natalie as he says that it’s weird. He thought he was sleeping with Natalie.

Flashback of Cairo picking up Natalie and dumping her on his bed. Then he tucks her in properly.

Rocco realizes what happens and tells Cairo he was jealous, which Cairo completely poo-poos. Cairo protests that the girl should sleep in the bedroom. Rocco nods and says the sick one sacrificed himself. He reaches up to feel Cairo’s forehead, which Cairo cringes at – but doesn’t pull away – and Rocco adds that because he held Cairo tight, at least the fever went down. Cairo rips Rocco’s hand off his forehead at that, protesting for Rocco to get off.

Natalie yells that they don’t have time for that! Do they know who's outside? Keypad beeping. Natalie protests that Mom’s here! Everyone starts freaking out. Crazy running around the apartment, with Rocco getting shoved in Cairo’s room. Heh. I love this show's physical comedy. As Mom enters, Cairo and Natalie regroup and stand there hugging each other. I wonder if they’re still going to do that when they’re a real couple. It’s only been since they kissed that I remember them doing this. So maybe they will. Cairo clucks at Mom for not ringing the doorbell. She replies that she called as she was coming in; right, Natalie? Natalie nods vigorously.

Cairo takes a look over at the bedroom. Like Mom’s going to go in there. She thinks you guys are a couple. She’s not going to want to see your messed up bed. Mom smiles and says that they’re together all the time, eh? As in live together. Natalie starts to say ‘no,’ but Cairo smiles and says that they don’t want to be separated from each other for even an hour. He is such a cheese ball.

Mom heads over to the kitchen, where the mess from last night – including the *three* bowls of pasta are sitting – and declares that it's a mess. Cairo says that Mom sent over some chicken and ginseng stew and thanks to it, he’s totally recovered. I wonder if Mom knows Cairo’s slick voice. She has to know it, when he’s saying all the right things and not meaning any of it. Mom picks up a wine glass and asks if Natalie fed Cairo liquor when he's sick. Natalie laughs and says that getting a plenty of sleep, deep sleep, is the best when sick. Mom asks why there are 3 glasses. Although replying that they had a friend over with them would be completely plausible… Cairo says that the glass he was using got a bit dirty. Mom knows what a clean freak he is, since he takes after her…

Mom declares that she wants to see the bedroom and heads over towards it, without getting permission. The glasses made her suspicious. Cairo finally realizes and they hurry after her, with Cairo asking why she wants to see the bedroom. Rocco is listening at the door, so he quickly hides behind the bed as Mom opens the door. Cairo and Natalie are right behind her, trying to spot where Rocco has hidden. Mom declares that they better get new bedding... and a new mattress. Cairo declares that Natalie will take care of it. Then he kicks Natalie who repeats that she will take care of it. Rocco moves again since Mom’s walking toward behind the bed.

Mom asks about them needing more storage space… and a vanity table. Who needs a vanity table? Cairo again declares that Natalie will take are of it, with Natalie adding that she will! They position themselves between Mom and the bed, so as to hide Rocco if he might be visible. Mom declares that she wants to do it for them. She repeats that she wants to do something for the pair. Cairo isn’t getting it. He points out that Mom shouldn’t barge in like this in the morning, with Natalie there and all.

Mom takes out Natalie’s phone, offers it to her and apologizes for the day before. The pair isn’t sure how to react to it. Mom declares that, beginning with yesterday, she has decided to stop doubting them. Natalie and Cairo look at each other. I bet they’re both wondering what they’re going to do if this is true. But thinking different things along with that question. Mom addresses Natalie as Ms.Natalie, but then corrects herself, saying that she’ll address Natalie more casually. She says Natalie’s name and again it sounds like a beautiful rose. Then she tells them to get married.

Rocco’s mouth drops open at that order. Natalie’s eyes look like they’re going to pop out of her head. Mom says that she wants to see them get married soon so they should get the parents together on the weekend. Side note: love that my subber used the phrase 'on the weekend.' Totally legitimate British Empire English. Natalie and Cairo look at each other, Natalie still looking shocked and Cairo looking like Mom has punched him in the stomach. Even though you know you like the girl! Cairo weakly agrees and Natalie smiles her ‘for-Mom’ smile.

Mom is in the car with Aunt driving. Aunt is practically dumb-founded that Mom is going to let the pair to get married. Mom replies that the couple will decide whether or not to get married. Mom says that she will do her best for their wedding. Work hard! Mom adds that Aunt knows that she’s serious about something when she does her best. Aunt agrees that that is Mom’s character. Aunt adds that she also knows how scary Mom’s best can be. And I laugh. Mom adds that the scariest thing is when the prospect of the marriage becomes real. Which both of the kids already know, looking at the train wrecks that are their parents’ marriages. Aunt realizes that Mom isn't just rolling over. Aunt asks what Mom has planned and Mom just smiles.

Natalie sinks onto Cairo’s couch, stunned that Mom has given her permission. She asks what she’s going to do now, since Mom really wants them to get married. Rocco sits down beside her and declares that it sounded like a death sentence when Mom said it... scary. Natalie scuffles her hair in frustration and yelps. She moans that she dug her own grave. It's getting deeper and deeper and she doesn’t think she can ever get out of it!

Cairo is sitting in the kitchen with his back to them. Natalie looks over at him and asks what he’s planning on doing. He has no response; he’s thinking. And probably thinking that the idea of marrying Natalie isn’t such a bad one. Natalie declares that an official meeting of the parents is out of the question. It would give her parents such high false hopes. How would they take care of that later? She doesn’t want it to get that far. Cairo looks over at the soup pot and – almost sadly – says, “okay.” Like he liked having Mom care about him like that.

Cairo nods and says that he understands. Natalie is surprised. Cairo says that he doesn't want to drag her parents into this any further. He looks like he feels really bad with how they’re going to get hurt in all of that. Natalie asks him, what about him? Rocco looks over at Cairo and looks like he feels bad for the guy. Cairo doesn’t answer, but lets out a large sigh and drinks his coffee. Aw, he’s going to go back to being alone. Just when he got used to them being there.

Cairo is at Bon Café, deep in thought. He picks up the phone and after a moment of internal debate, calls Mom. She answers the phone, calling him Cairo son-in-law! Immediately, she asks how he feels. She’s happy to hear he feels better. It makes her slaving in the heat worth making the stew. We don’t hear his part of the conversation. Mom says that, of course, she should take care of him. He’s their son-in-law for real now. Mom just called her about the official meeting between the parents.

Now we get to see Cairo’s reactions… Cairo is surprised that Mom already called. He inwardly groans and tells Mom that he’d like to speak with Mom about something regarding that. Cairo says that he’d like to visit Mom. Mom declares that Cairo’s too busy for that, so she’ll stop by his office. Cairo tries to shoot that idea down, but Mom hangs up the phone. Cairo sighs.

Rocco brings a drink for Cairo. Which he probably didn’t order. He tells Cairo that he did well. Natalie is so soft-hearted, it made him (Rocco) sad to see her being dragged here and there. It's good that Cairo’s cutting it off. Rocco adds a ‘thanks, Bro.’ Cairo replies that he didn't do it for Rocco. What's it got to do with Rocco, anyway? Rocco replies that he’s grateful because now he can date Natalie in public.

As soon as the word ‘date’ registers, Cairo jumps up out of his seat and sputters, “Da… date?” Rocco says that there’s so much that he’s wanted to do with Natalie: watch movies, ride bikes… hold her hand in the street. Aw. The thought of that last one makes Rocco smile, which Cairo doesn’t miss and it doesn’t make him happy. As Rocco’s thinking about it, he decides that he should make plans with her right away. He immediately pulls out his phone and excuses himself to call her. Cairo can only watch with concealed horror.

Rocco calls – and at first says that it’s him. Then he has to identify himself. Heh. But that doesn’t bother him. He asks Natalie to a movie on the weekend, since now they don't have to worry about other people’s eyes. Cairo watches with a face that looks tortured. I can hear him internally going, “Come on, man! Don’t! Don’t!”

Mom is now at Cairo’s clinic. They are looking at each other. Cairo isn’t saying anything and his face still looks like he’s struggling with the idea that Natalie has a date with Rocco. Mom asks him about what he wanted to say. Cairo sighs and says that he doesn’t know how to tell her. Mom comfortingly puts her hand on Cairo’s and tells him to just tell her everything. Cairo swallows loudly.

Natalie is at work, worrying about Mom’s reaction when she finds out. Zoe walks up and asks when the first official meeting of the families is happening. Natalie is immediately defensive. Zoe plays the: ‘Don't you want to tell me?’ like Natalie’s the one with a problem and isn’t being a good friend. Zoe assures Natalie that she’s okay. Natalie can be obvious with her happiness. Zoe says she hates it more when Natalie distances herself. Natalie feels bad and says that there’s something she wasn't able to tell Zoe. Then Natalie gets a text, which obviously freaks her out. Natalie quickly apologizes and runs off. Natalie sighs.

Natalie heads over to Cairo’s office, where he’s chilling on the couch. She demands to know what he did to Mom. He smiles and says that he didn’t do anything. Natalie pulls out her phone and shows him the text from Mom telling her to pick Mom up from the hospital since she’s having surgery today. Pained, Natalie asks if Cairo put Mom under his knife. Using a snipping motion, he says that he just got rid of the skin underneath her eyes. It was a simple 20 minute procedure.

Natalie groans and asks why Cairo decided to do it out of the blue? She protests that Cairo said he was going to quit the fake marriage! Cairo asks when he said that he was going to quit the fake marriage. They just have to prevent the official parents' meeting. Natalie is confused. She looks at Cairo and he winks at her so she slaps him in frustration.

Mom is happily chilling with a bandage wrapped around her eyes. Natalie bursts into the room, asking if Mom is okay. Of course she is. Thanks to Natalie, she’s getting free surgery. Cairo arrives to take off the bandages. With a shook sound effect at the end. Goofy. Natalie is surprised. Mom asks how she looks. Cairo declares that since Mom’s a natural beauty, he only cut a pinch off under her eyes. The results are fantastic. On the wedding day, people are going to think Mom is Natalie's sister. Natalie can’t believe what she’s looking at.

Cairo passes Mom a mirror and she is upset about the bruises and swelling. Well, what did she think was going to happen? Cairo assures her that they’ll disappear soon… in about a week, with ice packs and lasers, of course. Mom asks about the parents’ meeting and Cairo dramatically acts like he completely forgot! Natalie makes an irritated face at Cairo and he smiles smugly. Mom declares that she can’t do the meeting like that!!! Cairo declares that they’ll need to postpone, then. Cairo gets called out for another patient. Mom moans on how she’s going to feel inferior from the get-go because of this, but they can’t push back the meeting! Natalie says that she’ll explain to Mom. Mom doesn’t want Natalie to mention the plastic surgery and Natalie replies that she’s not that stupid.

Natalie calls Mom and tells her that Mom had to have hemorrhoid surgery. Which would be very painful. Hemorrhoids are no fun. Mom is fine with postponing the meeting, since Mom’s health comes before such formalities. Mom suggests visiting Mom, but Natalie quickly nixes that idea, saying that Mom would be embarrassed. Mom understands. But from the look on her face, it looks like she thinks that they’re procrastinating on purpose. Which they are, but this is not Natalie trying to get out of it…

Dad arrives with his board. He tells Mom that she’s pathetic. Nice. Mom calls. Mom’s shocked that Natalie told Mom, although she doesn’t realize that Natalie just said surgery, not plastic surgery. Mom asks if Mom is okay. Mom replies that she’s just a bit swollen. Mom wonders about sitting but Mom says that the embarrassing part is showing other people. Mom isn’t sure how to take Mom showing other people the results of her hemorrhoid surgery. Mom declares that if Mom waits just a bit, she'll be able to show Mom with confidence. Mom is still a little shocked.

Mom’s at the flower shop and says that she’ll come visit Mom. Mom says that it’s pretty ugly right now. Mom assures her that she won’t look at that area of Mom. Mom tries to get Mom to not come, but Mom asks if somehow she or Cairo made a mistake, which is why Mom won’t see her. Mom tries to assure Mom that it’s not that, but Mom puts on the guilt trip: Mom postponed the meeting and now she’s refusing Mom’s visit. It seems like Mom doesn't want Natalie to get married. Mom groans inwardly and declares that the official meeting is back on. Even when Mom mentions Mom overexerting herself, Mom is determined. After she hangs up, Mom doesn’t buy the bouquet, but asks for a refund of her money. Even though the florist had to put it together especially for Mom.

Mom’s planning on going to the meeting wearing sunglasses. Natalie protests. Dad isn’t any help. Rocco calls and Natalie apologizes but she has the parents' meeting. She hangs up leaving Rocco standing with popcorn and sodas at the movie theatre. He sadly says to himself that he thought it was over.

Family meeting. Nice tradition dress, Grandma. Mom is wearing a white dress. So is Aunt. Cairo arrives and asks what happened. Mom tells him that he’s late. Grandma tells him to sit. Cairo protests, asking how they could set the date without consulting him. Mom responds that he communicates with Natalie better than he does with her; she thought Natalie would've told him. Cairo wants them to postpone it, but Dad chimes in – finally – that Grandma is there. Mom innocently asks Cairo if he doesn’t want to marry Natalie anymore. Natalie and family arrives.

Opera soprano as Natalie and her family enter, with Cairo cringing. Silent communication between Cairo and Natalie where they argue over what's happening. Mom’s still wearing the sunglasses. Grandma doesn’t know how to take that. Awkward greeting each other. Time to sit. Mom has brought a special donut cushion for Mom, who is confused by the gesture. The families sit.

Grandma asks if it’s a little dark for Mom. Mom says that she's fine. Grandma isn’t. She tells Mom that it’s uncomfortable because they can’t see Mom’s eyes. Grandma nicely asks if Mom to take the glasses off. Mom smiles and says that they must not have been told about her eye surgery. Natalie hides her face with her hand for a moment, mortified to get caught in the lie. Mom explains about Cairo and the surgery on her eyes before she realizes that Mom didn’t know. Mom demands to know what Natalie told Mom. Natalie cringes. Mom gets what the pillow is for.

Mom quickly throws the pillow away and assures everyone that she’s very, very healthy there. Natalie covers her face with both hands, completely embarrassed. Please stop talking Mom. She's like Mrs. Bennett in 'Pride and Prejudice.' Aunt, Dad and Grandma try very hard to not laugh. Dad apologizes for his wife, says that Mom is flustered right now. Aunt’s failing at not laughing. Natalie smiles uncomfortably and looks over at Cairo, mouthing that she’s going to kill him. He squirms.

Everyone is eating. Or almost everyone. Cairo is picking at his food. Dad makes a show of giving Mom some food, which irritates Mom that her husband is not like that. Mom tries to get some food, but the glasses cause her not to be able to really see, so she makes a big mess. Dad clucks at her. Mom nicely declares that she shouldn’t have been in such a hurry to set the date. They’re just eager to have Cairo married. Mom says that she’d like the marriage to happen in two months. But what about consulting the horoscope? So that it’s a favorable day? Natalie, Cairo and Grandma all cringe at that suggestion. Grandma for a different reason, of course.

Mom replies that that will make the preparations tight. As Mom adds that she’d like to take time for the proper procedures for her only daughter, Cairo and Natalie look at each other, her asking him to do something. Mom replies that Mom doesn’t have to worry about anything. She'll take care of everything. Mom and Dad are shocked by that. Mom goes on to say that Cairo’s house is sufficient for the two of them. The furniture and electronics are all new. Anything else, Mom will go shopping with Natalie to pick up. Cairo is not happy – probably because Mom is indirectly implying that Natalie’s family is poor. Mom starts laughing with glee. Dad starts to protest, but Mom pokes him quiet. Mom nicely tells them that they’re sending their precious daughter, after all. She asks Natalie if that’s sufficient. Natalie just smiles awkwardly and claps like she’s excited.

Driving home, Grandma finally bursts out laughing. Aunt joins in. Then Dad. Mom wants to know what’s so funny. Grandma replies that Natalie’s family are great people. Plus, how long has it been since the family has looked at each other and laughed together? Mom replies that she didn't laugh. Dad tries to get Mom to lighten up. Didn't she have a fun time too? He tries taking her hand, but she pulls it away. Which I understand. You made your own bed, dude. Mom says that it wasn't fun at all. Grandma tells Mom that she has lots of hard work ahead of her. Aunt declares that Natalie's door to suffering is wide open now, too. She and Grandma quietly laugh again.

Natalie’s House. Mom is crooning about the nice and bright future that Natalie’s going to have. Dad thinks that it’s weird, Mom being in such a hurry. There's no such thing as a free lunch in life. Mom replies that they just love Natalie is why. People are not all calculative like Dad is. They’re so sophisticated. Dad agrees that Cairo’s family is totally different from them, each action, each word was gentle and refined, while Mom was making a mess like a kid. Mom grouses at Dad, comparing him to Dad’s affectionate manners. Which we all know is an act. The conversation just devolves from there. At least they’re talking instead of writing to each other.

Natalie puts her hands over her ears not to hear and sadly goes and sits in her room. She gets a text from Cairo, asking to see him outside. He has a present from his parents. Natalie mutters about the gift meaning that Cairo’s sorry. He gently asks how things are going inside. Okay? Natalie replies that of course they’re not. Her parents fought as soon as they came home. Natalie says that it wasn't even real, but she feels weird. Cairo swallows and says that he’s sorry. Aw. I like this Cairo. He promises to take care of Mom’s wrinkles for the rest of her life. Natalie laughs and jokingly thanks him for his generosity, which makes Cairo smile. This is why they're meant for each other, because they can look at something like this and see the humor in it.

Natalie worries about the future and the storms that are coming. Phone call. It’s Mom. She freaks and meekly answers it. Cairo should have just answered. Mom sweetly says Natalie’s name, with the echo effect again. Like a rose.

Bedding shopping at the department store. Natalie’s reluctant to get a nice set. She says that she wants a simple blanket that she can throw in the washing machine. She adds that she and Cairo can get it, since they’re using it. Mom responds by saying that she just wanted to get them something. Can't Natalie just accept it? And let me dig the knife in more. The sales lady croons over how there could be a mother-in-law like Mom. Usually they inspect the furniture from the bride like hawks. Mom modestly smiles. Wow, she really can play this part well. Sales lady tells Natalie that she’s very lucky. Mom hands over her card and as sales lady rings it up, Mom adds that she needs good bedding, since that’s where the precious Cairo descendent will be made. Heh. She is evil.

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