Chapter 3

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Noah’s diary entry - 27 March
Noah
Noah
*I was late with the tulip today.*
Noah
Noah
*My hands wouldn’t stop shaking when I tried to tie the ribbon.*
Noah
Noah
*I sat on the kitchen floor for ten minutes, dizzy and trying not to throw up.*
Noah
Noah
*My mom says I should rest more.*
Noah
Noah
*The doctors say words I pretend not to hear.*
Noah
Noah
*I don’t want to hear them.*
Noah
Noah
*I saw Sophie laughing with Dylan after school. Her eyes sparkled.*
Noah
Noah
*She said he wrote her a poem.*
Noah
Noah
*I wish I could’ve read it.*
Noah
Noah
*I wish I could write one for her, too. A real one, not this mess of a diary.*
Noah
Noah
*But I’m happy she’s happy.*
Noah
Noah
*And I won’t ruin that.*
Noah
Noah
*I can’t tell her. Not about the scans, or the hospital visits.*
Noah
Noah
*She’d worry. She’d stop smiling. And the moment she stops smiling, everything else stops being worth it.*
Noah
Noah
*So I’ll keep leaving the tulips.*
Noah
Noah
*Even if it’s getting harder to walk. Even if the color fades from my face.*
Noah
Noah
*She deserves to bloom*
Noah
Noah
*Even if I’m the one wilting.*
Noah
Noah
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