CHAPTER 10 - Just because I'm a beta⁴

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M.L. (James) POINT OF VIEW:

"I shouldn’t be here....."

I muttered to myself standing in front of Riley apartment. The air inside his apartment is the same, yet it feels different—like the scent of something I once called home but don’t belong to anymore. My pulse is a wild, uneven thing in my throat, my fists clenched at my sides, but I don’t turn back.

Earlier today at the company, My parents demanded that I should no longer delay the marriage.

 And for once, I agreed with them, They looked so surprised but I was too at the time to mind. I thought this was only for the best. My parents probably saw this as a chance and insisted I get a chance to meet my Fiancée in person.

Tonight, I'm supposed to be on a Dinner date, my parents set up for me and my fiancé to meet and get to know each other but here I am.

My mind saying one thing and my body doing otherwise.

The handle turns beneath my grip, and the door swings open with a sharp creak. It was very quiet inside and Riley was nowhere in sight.

'Maybe He'll be back late from work?'

Then it crossed me that I fired him, the other day. The only thing I could think of that kept Riley late was either work or whenever I was with him.

Then the memory of Riley with Zane crossed my mind, the thought of that left an uncomfortable irk in my chest.

And then I hear him.

His voice drifts from the bathroom, low and relaxed, The soft chuckle, the way he exhales between words—it’s not for me. Not anymore.

ZANE: "to be honest, After this morning, I've been thinking about you a lot."

Hearing another voice, I took a step closer before I can stop myself.

ZANE: "... would it be weird to say that I miss you?"

"......"

RILEY "....I miss you too."

My stomach drops. My breath locks in my chest. The words hit harder than they should, like they’re meant for me but aren’t, stolen by someone else on the other side of the screen.

I want to be unaffected. I want to scoff, roll my eyes, pretend I don’t care. But I do. I care so goddamn much it makes my fingers tremble as I press them into my palm. I can’t see him, but I picture the way he looks, the slight tilt of his head, that easy smile that once belonged to me. I imagine the way his lips curve, the way his body shifts against the bath tub, relaxed, open.

I remember what it felt like to be the one who made him that way.

And now? Now I’m standing outside a fucking bathroom door, seething, wanting, and furious with myself for all of it.

What the hell am I even doing here?

I shouldn’t have come. I shouldn’t have let myself get pulled back into this gravity, this stupid, aching orbit around him. But even as I tell myself that, I don’t move.

Because beneath the jealousy, beneath the frustration, there’s something worse.

" ...I still want him."

I thought, about to turn the bathroom door handle. What exactly was I hoping to achieve by coming here. I receded from the door about to leave and accept defeat....

RILEY: "Zane~, ...Do you have a lube?"

JAMES: "...!!!!! "

I didn't have time to think, I just moved.

My Hand grappled the knob like I wanted to crush it, Forcing the Door open.

I saw the way he’s leaning against the counter, damp strands of hair clinging to his forehead, a towel slung dangerously low on his hips. And certainly not enough to hide the phone —still connected, still on that call.

RILEY: "Jamie?"

JAMES: "... Looks like you have company."

A pathetic attempt at casual. A flimsy mask for the way my pulse is roaring in my ears.

I focused on the suprised look on his face in anticipation of shock. Maybe anger. I expect him to react—to flinch, to stammer, to shove me out and demand why the hell I’m here.

But he doesn’t.

Instead, he exhales slowly, like I’m nothing more than an inconvenience. Like my presence barely registers.

ZANE: "What happened over there? who was that?"

Riley lifts the phone, barely sparing me a glance, and says, “No one you need to worry about, I’ll call you back.”

'Was that what I was to him?'

I began to reflect on what I said at the office.

JAMES: "Why do you have to be difficult?!"

"Do you enjoy, putting me through this, what exactly do you want from me, Fine then, if you want to leave so badly, do it just bear it in mind that you'd come to regret it. Don't come crawling to me when it's too late."

How naive I was to think, if I said those things Riley wouldn't abandon me. Instead of getting what I wanted, Riley stormed out of the office without looking back.

And for the first time, I feel it the weight of my actions. The version of him I destroyed that day.

The man who used to press against me in the morning, groggy and warm, whining that I never stayed in bed long enough. The man who used to kiss me like I was his oxygen, like he’d forget how to breathe if I let go.

And now I see it. He did.

He moved on.

I wanted to tell him that I want him but my pride got in the way. I had no choice but to swallow my bitterness. Then I pushed my hands into my pockets so Riley won't see them shake and continued...

“You don’t seem too surprised to see me.”

RILEY: “Why would I be? It’s your bad habit, isn’t it? Walking into places uninvited...”

"....What do you want?"

I hated it.

I hate how easily he meets my stare, like I’m just another face in the crowd.The familiar warmth, softness in his gaze completely disappeared without a trace.

"Look, I don't have all night..."

And then—he walks past me.

Like I’m no one.

My Jealousy rose thick and fast, stiffening my chest, I couldn't hold it back anymore. I grabbed Riley and pinned Him against the wall, Leaving him no room to walk out on me again.

JAMES: "It doesn't matter, what you think now, I'm telling you Zane can't be trusted."

"He's my business rival, and I'm more than certain that he's doing this to get to me."

" He's just using you." I warned

Riley's next sentence, left an uncomfortable knott in my stomach.

"Using me?...."

".... wasn't that what you were doing?"

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