CHAPTER 1: Throbbing Youth – My Mom’s Getting Married!

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“Dad, my mom’s going to get married.”

“Congrats on her wedding!”

Bai Luo Yin woke up with a jolt, his ears and neck, slick with sweat. The summer weather was still not over and it resulted in him waking up from the heat every day. He casually ran his hands over his skin and his palms were matted with sweat. It was only the morning and he already felt like he was on fire.

Dragging along both of his sandals, Bai Luo Yin sauntered to the tap and dipped his head under it. The cool running water trickled down his neck and it lightened his mood a little.

Bai Han Qi, Bai Luo Yin’s father, was currently sweeping the courtyard. The 1.85m man stayed at home every day to do the chores. It would have been fine if he could clean the house properly, but he always made a mess out of it.

That was probably why Bai Luo Yin found him to be such an eyesore.

Bai Luo Yin swallowed a mouthful of water from his cup and spat it back out. He twisted open the tap, waiting for the water to wash away the white bubbles, but the water level in the basin only rose. It was probably clogged again.

A minute later, after fishing out a tattered piece of rag with a stick, the water finally started flowing down the drainage system.

“Dad, you stuffed my pants down the pool again.”

Bai Han Qi, who was in the middle of sweeping, suddenly paused when he heard the words. Throwing down his broom, he headed over to the clothesline. One…two…three… No matter how many times he counted, it seemed that a pair of pants were missing. Needless to say, it must have fallen off during when he was washing and got swirled down the drain along with the soapy water.

“Hey! Don’t throw it away. You can still wear it after it gets washed again.”

Bai Luo Yin could practically feel the smoke coming out of his nostrils. “Just leave it. You can wear it if you want.”

Walking out of the front doors and then bypassing an alleyway, he coincidentally encountered Yang Meng, who had also just left his house.

Yang Meng had a name which differed from most. When his father was younger, he had been a well known bitch in the village, reputed for having softer, more tender features than most women. Unfortunately, during that time, people’s beliefs were obstinate and it was regrettable that he turned out the way he was now. In the end, for the sake of passing on his genes to the next generation, Yang Meng’s father forced himself to get a wife. When Yang Meng was born, his father pinned all of his great expectation on his only son, and as a result, bestowed upon him the name “Meng.” (T/N: ‘Meng’ means ‘fierce’ in Chinese)

It was a shame, the way Yang Meng followed his father unwaveringly since he was young. While other children lived their lives playing in the mud or climbing trees, he would hide himself in his house, making paper cut-outs or sewing. As a result, Yang Meng would constantly get beaten. After every beating from his father, his father would end up crying, but after a while, would continue with his discipline as if nothing had happened.

“Where’s your hair?”

Yang Meng ran his fingers over his head, a hint of sorrow surfacing on his handsome face.

“Yeah, you didn’t need to mention it. It was already gone when I woke up this morning.”

“Did you father secretly shave it off last night?”

“Bullshit. Besides him, who else would?”

Bai Luo Yin let out a snort of laughter, “Seems like the two of us are the same after all”

A thought suddenly occurred to Yang Meng and he slapped Bai Luo Yin on the neck, “You called me yesterday and hung up halfway in the conversation. What were you going to say?”

Bai Luo Yin contemplated for a moment and casually said, “My mother’s going to get married.”

Yang Meng straightened his back. “You still have a mother?”

Bai Luo Yin took a deep breath, “Do you think my father’s an earthworm? Saving energy in his 5th phrase, mating in the 6th, and then getting fertilized?”

Yang Meng’s shoulders were shaking from laughter. “Don’t tease me. I’m being serious. I’ve known you since we were young and never once seen your mother.”

“Bullshit! My mother even came back and stayed here for a week last year. Did you forget? She always parked her car near your place.”

“Oh, I remember now. That was your mother? How come she looks younger than my niece?”

“Are you looking for a fight?”

“Nope, my niece was just born a few days ago and her head’s full of wrinkles.”

“Newborns all look like that.”

This time, Yang Meng didn’t say anything, seeing as Bai Luo Yin’s gaze had already drifted to one side. He suddenly felt as if a storm had been swept into his heart. They had been best friends for a long time and Bai Luo Yin had always blundered through an underprivileged life along with his father. Now that his mother was getting remarried, one could only imagine how he must feel.

“How about we find a group of people and fuck up the wedding? How’d you like that?”

“You?” Bai Luo Yin put on a mask of condescendence, “What kind of people could you find? A bunch of performance bitches? The military troops for battle?”

“Military troops?” A look of surprise flitted over Yang Meng’s face, “Just who the hell is your mother getting married to?”

“A Major General.”

Yang Meng was completely tongue tied, “Such…such a high ranking officer…”

“Yeah, keep on talking.”

“About what?”

“The people you were going to call.”

Under the dappled sunlight, Yang Meng’s face appeared so pale, it bordered on transparency.

“If I were to call them, it’d be equivalent to looking for a death wish.” Bai Luo Yin suddenly halted, peering steadily at Yang Meng. There was a carefully suppressed flame in his eyes which looked ready to erupt any moment.

“It’s fine. Just tell me what you wanted to say from the start.”

Yang Meng held his breath, slightly deflating under his own lack of confidence. “My uncle is the leader of the Wailing Bands*. I was going to ask him to bring along a group of people so that they could weep at the wedding. But now…”

(T/N: People you employ to weep and wail at a funeral. It makes the process look more sincere.)

“That’s actually a pretty good idea,” Bai Luo Ying cut in. “So how can I contact your uncle?”

“Just make sure not to harm us. We’re just normal civilians.”

“Don’t worry,” Bai Luo Yin bared a sly smile. “I’ll be sure to take care of your uncle.”

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