Chapter 1: Bitter Sweet Morning.

Eliza’s P.O.V

“urgh” I groaned as the morning sun broke through the gap in my curtains, while it’s a beautiful sight, it’s also unwelcome. My dreams have been disturbing my sleep recently.

A sudden knock on my door makes me jolt to sit up and through the door appeared my best friend and personal maid Cara.

“Liza, the Alpha and Luna are waiting for you in the dining room, stop being lazy and get up!” She says as she hits me with a pillow I’d dropped through the night. “FINE! I’M MOVING,” I yell as I sit up. Cara paid my yell no mind as she stood and smirked with a look of satisfaction painted on her face. Cara leaves the room and I remove myself from my bed and head over to my bathroom, it’s walls are black tiled with gold trimmings and a huge bath on one wall and a gold shower with glass doors on the other. I took myself into the shower in hopes that it would bring me out of my sleepy haze and ease me into the day.

Once finished, I grabbed a towel off the rail, brushed my teeth and headed back to my room to get ready for breakfast.

”Good Morning Sunshine“ I hear internally “Good Morning Amber” I replied, a little annoyed by her sarcastic greeting.

Amber is my wolf, she’s a beautiful creature with white fur, streaked with lavender and purple eyes and she’s quite large. She’s very unique, every one has commented that they have never seen a creature like her before. “Well, aren’t you just a little ball of happiness this morning“ she stated in my mind. “Did you see how that brat woke us up this morning!” I said sternly, Amber didn’t respond, just giggled like a pup rolling In the grass, “Shut up mutt” I say as her giggles annoy me more “I haven’t got time for this.”

“Fine meat bag” she uttered through her giggles.

After I was ready, I made my way down the three sets of stairs, through the lobby and into the dining room.

As I entered the dining room, I was greeted by my mother and father who were already sat at the table, discussing the arrival of Alpha Kaiden. After saying good morning, I decided that I would just sit and eat in silence.

I hoped my parents wouldn’t ask me for input on this conversation as the idea of yet another egoistical, pompous ass visiting the pack was not my idea of fun, but this is pack business and so is sadly necessary for the future of Half Moon.

As I sat quietly eating and I listened to my mother and father talking about the up coming visit from Alpha Kaiden.

“I should be finished with the celebration preparations by tomorrow afternoon”

I heard my mother say and my fathers response to my mother was short but sweet as always as he replied, “Timely as always dear.”

My mother smiled lovingly at my father as he turned his attention to me,

“Liza, could you please join me in my study when you’ve finished? I have something I wish to discuss with you.”

“Of course daddy” I replied, he then rose from his seat, pecked a sweet kiss on my mother’s forehead and left.

My mother and I finished eating and she too left to continue with the preparations for Alpha Kaidens arrival celebration, Ellie, one of the maids and someone I deem as a friend approached and cleared the table. She grinned and said playfully, “ ooooooooo, someone’s in trouble.” With a small giggle, I replied “Shut up Ell.”

“Who did you beat up or offend this time Liza?”

“No one.” I replied simply “At least, not that I remember” I said with a small shrug. We both giggled and went our separate ways.

After I had left the dining room, I walked up the stairs and down the corridor to my father’s study as requested. I knocked on the door and was called to enter.

As soon as I entered, I was greeted by Beta Gregory with a small bow, “Good morning lady Eliza.” I smiled and nodded back “You really don’t have to do that Beta Gregory” I said with a smile, I hate formality, “Yes, so you say pup, but I also keep telling you, I may be an old man but you can simply call me Greg.” Snap, I suppose I couldn’t really argue with that considering what I was asking of him, see, I’ve been brought up to respect my elders, and Gregory is more like an uncle to me, yet we still address each other with such formal titles out of respect for our positions in the pack.

My father smiled as he watched our interaction and decided it was time to address the reason he’d called me here “Greg, can you please leave us?.” Beta Gregory then turned to face my father and gave a small nod “Yes Alpha, I need to check on the progress of the new pack house anyway so mind-link me if you need me.”

My father nodded and Beta Gregory left, my father then turned to me and his face grew serious yet somehow sad. “What’s the matter daddy?” concern swept through me like whirlwind in a storm, my father looked me in the eyes and replied full of sorrow “Liza, Gamma Alexander was killed by rogues while patrolling the boarders last night.”

I gasped and threw my hand to my open mouth, shock painted on my face and then pure sadness.

Alex and I had been friends since childhood, he came from a family of Gamma’s, unfortunately he lost both his parents and never had pups, not that he didn’t want them it was just that he didn’t want them with me. Alex was my first mate but while we felt the strong pull of the bond, we also valued our friendship more than anything so we decided that he would reject me and I would accept, at the time we realised this would be painful and meant going through life mate less but it didn’t matter as long as our friendship remained strong.

My father then spoke again, bringing me out of my daze “Are you alright sweetheart?” Father asked as a stray tear fell “Yes.” I replied as I wiped the tear away, I never was one for crying, I won’t start now.

My father then continued “Sweetheart, that’s not the only reason I have asked you to come and see me.” I looked into his eyes, my head tilting in confusion. “Then why else am I here daddy?” I questioned.

What else could there possibly be? I thought.

My father cleared his throat and what he would say next shocked me to my core.

“Eliza, I spoke with your mother and Beta Gregory early this morning and we were wondering if….” Father hesitated for a moment, a look of concern and uncertainty painted his eyes until he said “If you would do us the honour of becoming our new Gamma?”

”What?” I asked, both out of shock and confusion, did I just hear my father correctly? Did he just ask me to be the Half Moons new Gamma? Again, my father coughed and broke me out of my daze, “Are you sure daddy?” I asked. My father nodded his head with a smile “If you want it sweetheart, then the position is yours.”

Me, a Gamma, such a compliment but at the same time it’s bitter sweet, if Alex hadn’t have died, then I wouldn’t have been offered this chance, I lost my friend but gained his title. “I’d love to be Half Moon’s Gamma.” I said with a smile, I’ll make Alex proud and pass on his teachings as he did with me. My father then rose from his seat and walked around his desk to face me and gave me the biggest hug. “Thank you daddy” I said softly “You deserve it baby girl.”

“I won’t let you down” I said with a soft smile. My father smiled back and told me he’d given the soldiers the day off to mourn their now late Gamma. My father was so different to the rest of the Alphas in the area, daddy ran the pack like we were one big family and understood that the soldiers have feelings too, and like everyone else, they needed to process Alex’s passing.

We took our seats once again and my father’s face was still soft but also concerned. “What’s wrong daddy?” I asked, he looked at me as if I were a pup again.

“I know these changes will be hard Liza, not just for you, but for the soldiers but I hope you understand that you are my pup no matter how big you get, this grumpy old man will worry. If there is anything you need to make this transition easier, please come to me.”

I stood from my seat and rounded the desk to my father and wrapped my arms around his shoulders, resting my head against his, I replied “I will daddy, thank you.” He held onto my arms that were wrapped around him and after a moment he spoke again “I love you little lavender.”

That pet name always gave me comfort. As a pup, my father would take time out to play with me, we would always run around in the fields but I would always find myself drawn to a lavender field we had nearby. My father decided to start bringing a picnic so when we’d finished playing, we would sit in the lavender field to eat. The pet name gained even more meaning when I turned 16 and finally gained my wolf, my father joked that the lavender streaks were from all the years rolling around in the lavender field, now as an adult, it makes me smile because when my father is no longer around, I will have a visual representation of my pet name. “I love you too daddy” I replied as I pulled myself out of my memories, “Do you need anything else daddy? I’d like to take a walk.” I asked,

“No sweetheart, you can go, I need to get started on Alex’s funeral arrangements anyway.” My father’s voice was sad, he took each loss we suffered in the pack to heart, he mourned every passing as if they were direct descendants in our own family tree.

“If you need any help with it daddy, let me know.” He gave me a nod and a gentle smile and gestured for me to leave.

I knew my father better than most, he needed time to process the loss as much as I did and I wouldn’t be the one to stop him so finally, I stood tall and left the room.

I stood in the hall for a moment and decided I would go to our private garden, no one else went there without our families permission.

As I made my way out to the garden, I mind-linked Cara and asked her to meet me by the pond, we would sit by the pond almost daily as pups, reading, laughing and playing board games while my mother would sit on the bench, watching us and smiling at our innocence.

The pond was beautiful, my father had it constructed and planted with flowers that reminded him of my mother and I. Lilies and lavender bushes decorated the parameters of the pond while a large cherry tree offered shelter for the bench at its base.

I sat down on the bench thinking about what father had told me in his study, “Poor Alex” I sighed. I wondered if he’d been afraid in that moment. Did he know he was going to die? Did he feel his life draining? Alex was loyal to his Alpha and pack, fear wasn’t a word I’d have associated with him but I couldn’t help it in this moment and then a question came to my mind, was that why the decision to reject each other came so easily to him? Was it our friendship that drove him? Or was it the mate bond? Was he trying to protect me from the pain losing the mate bond through untimely death caused? As I sat thinking through this, my thoughts were quickly driven away by a voice.

“Liza, what the hell is so important that it could’t wait until later?” Cara snapped, she was pissed for sure. “Your mother will kill me if she finds out I’ve left,” I know mother can be quite stern but rather than worry about it all I could respond with was “Alex is dead.” Shock slapped Cara in the face and she pulled me into a hug, “Oh my god Liza, I’m so sorry.” Sympathy replacing the anger she held a moment ago “How did it happen?” she asked. I couldn’t give her a full explanation, hell, I wasn‘t given full details so I said the only thing I could muster, “Rogues.” I couldn’t look Cara in the eye so I kept my gaze on the pond, watching the light waves from the summer breeze as the sun reflected off the surface. Cara pulled me into another hug before saying “I’m sorry Liza, I really have to go but we’ll talk about this later ok, I love you girly.”

After Cara left, I decided that I was going to stay here for a short while, I’d mind-linked my parents to tell them I was by the pond if they needed me and not to worry about me.

I needed to process what had happened this morning. I lost one of my closest friends and been given his title all in the same day, of course my parents understood and my father told me to take today to let things settle in my mind and that he would come with me to the morning training to inform the soldiers of the change and given the circumstance, I gratefully accepted.

after a few hours of sitting and pondering my role moving forward, I decided to head back inside and join my family for lunch. I wasn’t particularly hungry but I valued this time with my family, running a pack is hard and leaves very little time for anything else but we all made a conscious effort to make sure we ate together so we could spend time as a family.

As I entered the dining room, I was met with pure silence. My parents looked at me with concern and while I understood, it also made me feel a little self conscious. Their eyes followed me as my made my way to my seat and sat down. After what felt like forever, the silence was finally broken by my mother, she’d cleared her throat and then spoke “Are you ok princess?” My mother had clearly been worried about what effect my father’s news had on me. “I’m fine” I reassured her. Though part of me knew that my mother knew I was lying, my mother just smiled and started tucking into her lunch.

As I sat pushing my food around my plate with my fork, the silence itself was deafening. My parents were usually chatty and cheerful but today, there was nothing, if it wasn’t for the fact that my mother had inquired about my well being, I’d have sworn a witch had cast a spell, stealing both their voices.

I decided to break the uncomfortable silence and looked at my mother “How are the preparations coming along?” I asked with a fake but cheerful tone. My mother looked at me as if she knew what I was trying to do and replied with a small smile “They’re going well, thank you princess,” she then countered “Cara disappeared earlier but wasn’t gone for long, I assume you summoned her from her duties?” It was more of a statement than a question, I nodded “Yes, sorry mum, I just really needed her.” My eyes dropped to my still full plate as mother replied “That’s fine princess, I was already expecting her absence, I’d given her an assistant for that very reason.” Silence followed but I offered my mother a grateful expression, I didn’t have to say anything, my mother always knew what I was saying just by reading my face.

Once lunch had finished, my parents hugged me tightly, they suggested that I should get some rest. They knew I hadn’t been sleeping well lately, I nodded in agreement, after all, I needed all my strength and wits now more than ever, I was the Gamma now, I had to ensure that I was always at the top of my game if I wanted to give the soldiers the best chance in battle and ensure the safety of the pack.

We left the dining room together and split off in our own directions.

Once I entered my room, I fell onto my bed and my thoughts again filled with the days events so far. I tried to pick my mind for what Alex would say to me about all of this. I knew that he would be pushing me, I wasn’t the kind of girl who would be sat in her room crying and if I was, I’m sure Alex would have dragged me out of it by my hair if he had to.

Alex always told me he admired my strength and fierce attitude, he would always make sure he had a front row seat every time an Alpha visited, he loved nothing more than watching me tear an Alpha down a peg or two with my sarcasm, he knew I had a very low tolerance for ass holes no matter who they were or what title they held.

I giggled to myself thinking of the last time an Alpha came to visit from the Moon Light pack, Alpha John Howl brought his son Andrew with him and his Beta. The Beta was a nice guy but the Alpha and his mutt were the biggest ass holes I’d ever had the displeasure of meeting, his son was very…..handsy for lack of a better word, and one day in the dinner hall at the pack house, he took it too far, I broke his nose in front of the whole pack, our fathers were furious but Alex found the whole thing hilarious.

My thoughts then turned to dread, how the hell was I going to cope with another too big for his boots Alpha without my friend? I had no idea but I needed to push the thought aside, “One day at a time Liza.” Amber must have felt my turmoil as she came forward to comfort me and retreated back into my mind. “Yeah, one day at a time” I repeated out loud and closed my eyes, after a few minutes, I managed to drift off to sleep.

...****************...

I suddenly found myself in a glade. The sun hugged my skin bringing me warmth, it was an amazing feeling, I looked around and watched as butterflies and bees kissed the wild flowers and the birds sang in the trees, I felt at peace, one with nature some would say.

As I looked around, my attention was moved to one particular spot and I’d frozen in my position.

Off in the distance but not too far, I figure walked out from between two trees, it took a couple of minutes for the figure to become clear.

When the figure was close enough for me to see, I was shocked, what is happening?

“LIZA!” the figure called, it was him. Alex.

Alex approached and wrapped his arms around me, I accepted his embrace and hugged him back tightly. “Alex?” I questioned, “Am I going crazy? Daddy said you’re dead, how is this possible?” Alex giggled and moved away, he smiled down at me and began to speak “I may be dead physically Liza, but I will always be alive in your heart and mind, this is all a gift from the moon goddess herself.” A gift from the moon goddess? Yep, Eliza, you’ve finally lost it I thought to myself. Then, as if he was reading my mind, Alex offered an explanation. “I promise Liza, you aren’t going crazy, Selene thought you may need some closure and allowed me to come to you, she said you had questions that only I could answer and feels if I give them to you, you may be able to accept what’s happened.” So this is real, he knows of my inner turmoil in the garden.

After a minutes of silence between us, I finally managed to pluck up the courage to ask the questions I so desperately wanted the answers to. “Were you scared?” He stood there for a moment as if contemplating the carefully, he then said “Maybe we should sit Liza.” We sat down and Alex sighed “I won’t lie to you, I was a little and to answer another question, yes, I did feel my life draining but I accepted it long ago. Being a Gamma is a risk in and of itself Liza, see, as Gammas, we need to understand that we can’t expect the soldiers to give their lives for us and the pack if we ourselves, are not willing to give our own.”

I let his words sink in for a minute, even in death he was teaching me, giving me knowledge that I otherwise wouldn’t have learned until it was too late.

I stared at him, I wanted to know if he’d felt the pain as he slipped away but I couldn’t, if he did, how would I handle the answer? I decided to move past it and ask another. “Was that why it was easier for you to reject me?”

He seemed taken a back by my question but swiftly answered “Really Liza?, you thought it was easy for me?” He asked rhetorically, “That couldn’t be further from the truth! Rejecting you was the hardest decision I had ever had to make, you were my best friend, I loved you so much, I was over the moon when my wolf recognised you as our mate but I couldn’t put you through the heart ache. I knew my death would come eventually and more than likely unnaturally. The pain you’re feeling now is nothing compared to what you’d have felt through the mate bond Liza, I couldn’t be responsible for causing you that kind of pain.”

So the rejection wasn’t about our friendship. It was indeed, about saving me from the pain. Silence surrounded us again and then a thought came to my mind, I’m the new Gamma, is he happy for me? Could he offer further advice? I suppose now was as good a time as any to ask, after all, I may never be able to after this.

“Alex, I gather the moon goddess has informed you of the situation regarding your title,” Alex nodded and smiled at me sweetly “She has” he replied. I took a deep breath and sighed “How am I going to do it Alex?Look at me, I’m 5ft nothing and female for goddess sake, how will the men ever take me seriously?” “Hey, stop that right now!” He said in mock annoyance, “You are Eliza Stone, heir of the Half Moon pack, you’re confident, feisty and smart, if anyone deserves my position it’s you!” His voice radiating the belief he had in me.

That was all I needed. To know I had his blessing threw out all of the doubts I had about my new role. “Thank you Alex,” no one could ever bring me to my senses like he could, he always knew just what to say.

“No problem, now, let’s cut the mushy crap, this isn’t us, I’ve got to go now Liza but I want to say something before I go.” My ears pricked and I tuned in, it sounded important so I listened intently. “Alpha Kaiden is due tomorrow, part of me really wants to see you hand his ass to him like you did the last one,” we both giggled at the memory but Alex turned serious, I couldn’t tell he was going to offer me guidance on how to handle it now I was the Gamma. “You need to keep a cool head. As Gamma, the pack will be relying on you to ensure their safety, if the Alpha doubts you, even for just a second, he may rethink the alliance and we can’t afford that, the rogues are getting stronger and growing in their numbers, I’ve heard talks about rogue Lycans too, it is just a rumour but you must keep this is mind Liza, you can’t be too careful.”

I took his words and considered them, I’ve heard tales of Lycans but we’ve never seen them, I always thought they were just figments of our imagination, they still could be just rumours, fantasies put out there by the rogues to scare us. “I really do have to go now Liza, just remember what I said, you’re going to be an amazing Gamma,” we both stood and I pulled him into a hug. The next thing I knew, I was awake.

I didn’t feel as if I’d slept long but when I looked at the clock it was 5:36pm “DAMN IT!” I yelled to myself as I jumped out of bed and ran to the dining room. I rushed through the door to my seat and my parents watched me with confusion. “Hello dear” my mother said, “We’re sorry princess, we thought you weren’t coming so we started without you.” I nodded and smiled, “Sorry, I slept longer than I wanted too,” my father then cut in “It’s quite alright my little lavender, now, get some food, you’ll need your strength for training in the morning.”

My father was right, tomorrow would be my first day as the new Gamma. As I thought of my dream and the conversation I had with Alex within it, I remembered what he said “You’re Eliza Silver, heir to the Half Moon pack, you’re confident, feisty and smart.” A smile graced my face as I recalled his words of confidence, yes I am, I thought to myself, and with those encouraging words, I ate my dinner and for the first time today, I actually looked forward to what tomorrow would bring.

I glanced at my father who seemed miles away but as I looked at his eyes, I noticed they were glazed over and realised he was in a mind-link.

Once he’d ended his link, he looked at me and coughed while emptying his mouth of the food he’d been chewing, “Little lavender, you’ll need to take training early in the morning, Alpha Kaiden will be here by 8am so I’ll need you back here by 7:30 at the latest.” Damn it!, I’d forgotten about the Alpha! “Well, that bliss lasted long” Amber chuckled in my mind, “Not now mutt!” I replied internally as I looked at my father and nodded obediently, “Of course daddy” I smiled. He nodded at me and smiled back.

I looked at the watch I’d decided to wear today and took in the time, 6:40pm. I lifted my head back up and looked at my parents, “May I please be excused?, I would like to have a bath and get an early night ahead of tomorrow.”

“Of course princess” my mother responded, so that’s exactly what I did. I took a long hot soak in the tub and decided on what the training would consist of. Content with the choice I had made, I exited the tub, got dried and into my pjs.

I went back into my room and climbed into bed, allowing the plush pillows and duvet to suck me into comfort and whisk me away in to a deep sleep.

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