After school:
"Lotus, I think Pan is wanting to talk to you today. Don't you think so?" asks Nicky.
"I don't know. Don't overthink it by yourself. I already make it clear. I won't have any feelings for him anymore. Also, we haven't been taking since that time. How can he want to talk to me out of the blue?" I reply confidently.
"Out of the blue? I don't think so. I think he knows that you won't be here starting from next week." says Nicky
"How can he know this? It's a secret between you and me. Is it because my dad come to school today?" I ask.
"Maybe..."
"Lotus!" a voice shouted from the corner, but I don't know who is it. Is it ….
"I have to go now. See you tomorrow!" Nicky informs me before she leaves.
"…” (Shock! \=\=)
"Can we have a talk?" Pan asks politely.
That's right. It is Pan! Pan is here. Pan is talking to me after many years have passed. Pan is finally talking to me again!
Wait, wait, wait, what am I thinking about? I should not be moved because of this boy again. There's no way I fall for him again! Remember Lotus! He hurts you!
“Okay” I coldly agree without looking at his face.
"..."
"..."
"Are you going to talk?" I finally have the courage to ask him after standing in front of each other for a while.
"Y-yes"
"..."
"I ... I"
"..."
"Are you going to leave next Monday?" asks Pan.
"Yes"
"Ok"
"..."
"I wish you all the best. :)"
I stare at him while he is smiling at me. Why do I feel like he is not willing to let me go? Does he love me back? No way! Maybe there's a reason behind this, but not … love.
"Thank you :)" I smile back
"You're welcome."
"I get to go now."
"Are you walking back home?"
"Yes"
"Ok, walk safely. :) Bye (wave) ..."
I cannot hear what he says next because I already walked away when I heard the word 'bye' from him. Why am I weeping again? Why did he smile all the time during our conservation? Did he really mean it or … he tried to hide something from me?
So … our conservation has ended like this. It was both awkward and nervous. We never talked formally before, but we did it today, and it was weird to me.
Goodbye, Pan, I also wish you all the best.
I stop by the park near my house, sitting under the tree like I normally did. It is quite cold today. Winter is coming soon ... I look up the sky inhaling fresh air around here. It is comfortable staying here. I will start a new chapter of my life soon, so let me think about Pan one last time.
(Christmas)
"Papaya! Come here. I get you something amazing." says Pan. He is in front of my house right now. Our families know each other, so we sometimes celebrate the festivals together.
"What is it, banana?" I smirk back at him.
"Here, I made you a bracelet" He then gives it to me
"Wow! A beaded bracelet? There's my name on it!" I speak excitedly.
"You like it?" He asks.
"Yes, I really like it. Thank you ... banana hahaha"
"\=\="
"I also got you something"
"Really? :D"
"Wait me at the garden, I'll be back soon" I tell him before I go and get him his present that I prepared days ago.
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