BTS: Where I First Fell In Love (Vminkook) The Night Of Something First!

Taehyung’s POV:

Have you ever loved someone so deeply that you just don’t know how to love anyone else in the same way? I don’t even know how to love my own self

My love

My love began with a old house that was called as BTS dorm

My first day is so vividly rooted inside my brain that I could never forget these memories..

I am living in my memories truth to be told..

2011..

That was the year, when I had gone to support a friend who was going to audition for Big Hit Entertainment

I neither dreamed of becoming a singer nor did I planned to.. I was just there to support him and nothing else… my mind was free from everything as I sat with my friend and watched him being nervous and on a hook.. he wasn’t alone… everyone around me looked equally nervous

It was quite exhilarating to watch..

My friend’s name was called for the audition and I patted his back.. I was excited for him.. who wouldn’t be? This was his life changing moment

But after half an hour.. he walked out with a gloomy face.. he looked sad and defeated

I asked him what happened… and sadly he was rejected

I wanted to motivate him to never give up.. and that’s exactly what I did

We decided to head back to our homes.. but as we neared the exit, someone walked up to us and instead of talking to my friend that person spoke to me..

“You should try out too, you seem to have potential”

Those were his words and I would later realise he was one of the director of the BigHit entertainment

It was awkward though.. hearing the man say I had potential when my friend was rejected

My friend looked at me with an expression less face.. But I could tell he was upset about the whole scenario

Nevertheless.. I didn’t want to let go of this chance.. if this man sees potential in me, surely I would have some talent..

I do love music.. it’s more on a passionate side then a dream.. in my village, in Daegu, I would play saxophone which my father gifted to me..

I love to play saxophone and I think I was pretty good at it.. apart from that, I barely had any musical talent.. I didn’t know how my voice would sound.. or was it just a good voice that was needed.. I realised later, looks also played a major factor in getting selected.. and if you’re good in dancing then that was cherries on top

I was still a stranger to what the company was and what did they plan to do with all these new youngsters who want to have a career in music industry..

I nodded to the man who looked at me expectantly

I heard my friend say.. he would wait for me..I guess he hoped I would be rejected.. honestly, I hoped the same.. because really, this happens only in movies where a movie director sees someone and just casts them and change their life completely., I loved to dream but I was never drunk in it

I followed the man and he took me to a auditioning room which was quite big actually..

That was when I felt nervous.. my throat was dry and I kept gulping to have some sort of water.. I was so nervous that I could feel my hand shake around the hem of my shirt.. my palms were sweaty by then

The man walked up to me with a bottle of water.. and told me whenever I was ready I could begin performing..

I chose my parents favorite song to sing.. I closed my eyes and just let my voice do the work.. I knew the lyrics and that was of great help.. I didn’t even realise how I was sounding.. I just let myself be drifted to the lyrics that held great memories for me.. I would listen to the song with my parents and my favorite person, grandma.. I smiled thinking about them..

I finished the song eventually.. by the end of it.. my voice was crooked because I was so nervous

The man who motivated me to audition, walked up to me and smiled brightly..

“You’re selected”

Those words echoed in my mind like a music..

I was selected

I wish now that I should have never been selected

Then I would have been fine in my little hometown..

Then I would have never met him..

The one who took away my desire to love.. the one who took away a big portion of me.. the one who damaged all the willpower inside me to move on..to let go..

2011, I was 15 that time..

My appa had come to drop me at a place that was going to be my home for many years.. many years before success

I wore a normal pant and a shirt tucked in..

I had a black leather jacket on..

And it was expensive

I looked at my appa..

He said

“You can do it bear”

“I am so proud of you”

Those words still ring in my ears.. they hold so much power and honesty for me.. probably because of those words, I am still able to live.. it doesn’t matter if I am living a meaningless life

My meaning of life was betrayed here in the place meant for seven boys who will be seen as “Bangtan Sonyeondan” for the world

I hugged my appa tightly..

And entered a small room apartment

It was a small company that time so the budget was low and we have to cooperate with whatever they offered us

I flexed my jacket a little.. honestly I just wanted to fit in.. didn’t want to show that I belonged to a farmer’s family..

I heard they all were city boys.. but later I would find out that it wasn’t all of them..

However.. I just wanted to show… that I could mix up with them.. I could socialise with them.. and that I wasn’t a weirdo

I have heard it a lot.. people calling me weird.. it didn’t bother me then but it apparently bothered me a lot when I entered the dorm

I clenched on to my small bag as I opened the dorm room door..

Four boys were standing in a small living room and smiling at me.. I smiled at them awkwardly

Hi, I am Jin.. the oldest among all of us.. I just found him gullible back then.. I bowed to him frantically

I am suga.. I rap and write songs.. nice to meet you..

Wow, he was handsome.. his pale skin looked so smooth.. I wanted to touch it.. and that was my cue of acting weird, so I stopped myself.. the boy smiled at me and I realised he had a gummy smile..

I am your hope, you’re my hope, I am J-hope.. wow, this boy was the loudest and cheerful of them all.. actually, I was glad that there was someone like him.. because I love to be loud and happy.. maybe, he and I can be good friends.. I hoped for being best friends with him though.. that’s how i thought

Then appeared before me.. the man who has stayed beside me still.. “I am Namjoon but my stage name is Rap Monster.. I am the leader of the group” he said it with confidence.. I stiffened at those words and kept bowing to him nervously

I heard them all chuckle..

That made me relaxed

And I gave them my grandma’s favorite smile.. a boxy one.. that’s what she called me.. a boxy baby bear.. gosh, I miss my grandma so much..

They all welcomed me warmly.. they asked me to settle in..

They took me to a room where there were bunker beds..

“There are only two beds left near the window, so you can pick anyone of it” the oldest of them all said..

I counted there were seven beds and only two were vacant.. then there was another member left as I only met four by then

“Are there five members?”

The boy who had sunshine like smile told me about another member who is by far the youngest among us..

“The youngest one was away for a singing practice” Jhope hyung said

I frowned.. shouldn’t they all be at practice then..

The boy who had cat like smile, suga hyung, spoke.. the youngest member has to practice a lot to polish his voice

Wow that was so cool.. I thought to myself

I took the top bunk near the bed.. I settled in.. jin hyung got me some food and I immediately digged in.. I realised I was a lot hungry that time

I slipped some food on my expensive leather jacket.. shit.. now that was a tragedy..

Now that I think off.. I really should have been grateful to my appa who had no money for such clothing and yet saved a lot just so that I can wear whatever I liked.. I wish I could go back and hug my appa again..I want to be grateful for it

I can still hug him.. but that moment was precious

I mostly stayed on the bed.. it was my first day.. and I didn’t know what to do.. they all were busy in something.. Namjoon, suga and Jhope hyung were discussing about some rap lyrics.. they were the main rap line of BtS.. then there was jin hyung who was practicing a dance routine in one corner of the living room.. I could tell that time he struggled a lot..

Later they shared with me about how they were selected by the company.. I was in awe of them..

Namjoon hyung was a underground rapper and was the first one to join BTS.. then there was suga hyung who won second place in a rap competition.. although, Jhope hyung didn’t win a competition by another company, Big Hit offered him a place because of his amazing dance skills.. they were so cool.. the coolest people I have ever seen in my life

And to my surprise.. jin hyung was selected when he was out minding his own business.. jin hyung says it’s all because of his face that he got a spot here.. he needs to work hard on his singing and dancing..

I felt bad for jin hyung.. and I could relate to him.. since I felt I wasn’t up to the mark myself

The youngest member came after them.. he was only thirteen when a company rejected him.. but was approached by many other companies and he chose big hit because he was inspired by Namjoon hyung’s rap.. I would choose bighit too if I heard Namjoon hyung rap, because he is just awesome in it

I didn’t realise I was very tired so I dozed off in my clothes that I wore since morning..

I woke up late at night..

Around midnight..

Everyone was already asleep

But I had a bladder problem..

So I rushed down my bunk..

And without any thought I just entered the bathroom..

I was in such a hurry to pee that I didn’t realise the shower was running and maybe someone else was there in the bathroom..

I finally felt relaxed and turned my eyes towards the shower

A very young boy, was standing n@ked under the shower.. his hands caged around his chest and his eyes looked terrified

“I am… I am sorry”

That’s all I said and rushed out of the bathroom

I waited outside the bathroom for him… I wanted to explain myself

I really didn’t mean to invade his privacy.. I cursed my own bladder issues that time

After fifteen minutes the boy walked out.. wearing a night shorts and loose top.. he looked scared when his eyes landed on me

I felt I messed up everything

I decided to speak first

Tae

I am sorry.. i am new here.. i had no idea you were there.. i just wanted to go urgently

Tae

I am sorry if I made you uncomfortable

The boy nodded..

He was nervous and I could say he wanted to just rush to his bed and hide in the blanket..

I thought I shouldn’t make him more uncomfortable so I decided to say good night

Tae

Uhm.. okay.. then good night

I turned to walk away

Until he spoke

Kookie

I am Jungkook..

Kookie

Jeon Jungkook

I stopped on my heels.. because it was his voice that made me feel goosebumps for the first time

I had never heard such a sweet voice.. it was angelic..

I turned again.. my eyes wide and my smile reached to my ears.. I noticed now the boy was immensely beautiful.. he had a pair of doe eyes, they looked like glassy and very pure.. very very pure

So pure and innocent..

His cheeks chubby, his eyebrows shaped perfectly.. his nose were like cute buttons.. his lips were like pink roses.. a mole under his lips, was the cutest thing ever.. a tilted my head to see a scar on the upper part of his cheekbones..

I wanted to ask him how did he get that mark.. but I knew that wasn’t the right time.. I planned to do so though, when we became more comfortable with each other

Tae

I am Kim Taehyung.. I just arrived today..

Tae

You’re the fifth member?

Kookie

Yes..

His voice was so sweet.. did I tell you that..

Tae

It’s nice to meet you Jungkook.. I am sorry about earlier

Kookie

It’s okay..

Kookie

Uhm.. I should head to bed.. it’s very late

Tae

Yes.. it is..

He walked passed me and I just stared at his back for few seconds before following him to the same dorm room..

He took the single bed beside the two bunker beds near the window.. I climbed up to my bunk..

As I was about to cover myself in the blanket.. my eyes landed on him.. he looked at me at the same time

I couldn’t help but smile my boxy one..

I saw his eyes widen and he just shoved a smile at me before hiding in the blanket

He was the weirdest of all so far.. and that was coming from a weird person like me

Did I fell in love with him then?

No..

This wasn’t the night of the beginning of my love

But this was the night.. where I met the man I will love till this day

And he is going to get married

POV end!

Tae looked at the city lights while sitting in his living room couch.. he trailed his finger on the name “Jeon Jungkook” on a wedding card

Why? That’s all he could say to himself

Why would they do this to him? Why show him their happiness when he only fights to not hate them..

He is fighting.. a battle constantly runs inside him..

He doesn’t want to hate them..

Then why he is being pushed towards it

Kim Taehyung

Why would you hurt me?

Tae whispered to himself

Why?

“Why did the love that showed me the heavens gate.. was never mine..”

Taehyung asked his angels.. but sadly, his angels have been quietened or lost for so many years now

But Tae doesn’t like to accept that he stopped believing his angels