Prologue

There is a widespread idiom in our region that goes like this If you dream big like a mountain, you may attain something like a mustard seed. Well, I found that absolutely bullshit. So I slightly changed it to If you dare to dream big, you must reach its peak and conquer it. Now that’s much better. If you ask what my dream is, yes, it’s to become a doctor. I have always dreamed of being a doctor, wearing a stethoscope and white coat, treating patients, and being respected by others... It’s my dream life. My biggest supporter is my father. Do you know what he tells about me to the villagers?

"Dei, Sundarmani, What is your youngest daughter doing in the field with a sack?"

"Huh! She is catching frogs... pa."

"What? why is she catching frogs? does your house run out of rice?" hahaha...

"Aye, brainless fool! She is catching frogs for her science class, you won’t understand even if I tell you. you have never seen school steps... My daughter is first in her class and going to be a doctor, you wait, till you see my daughter in doctor’s coat, and you will beg her to treat you"... Haha...

My father will proudly speak about me in front of others who questioned me and my freedom and he allows me to do whatever I wish to do. Do you know what he calls me?

"Appa... tell me again, who am I to you?

"You are my Singakutti, (lion cub)my strong goddess"... Hahaha... He laughs while saying this and patting my head. I love to hear him say it, so I ask often. But my mother, on the other hand, is eager to rear me like my sister and herself, into an ideal traditional South Indian housewife.

"Sathya... fool! Look here, you put chilly, garlic and ginger next... see... try to learn from your sister.”

"Sathya... wash those clothes neatly, the collars and armpit part, then move to the wrist, this is how you wash a man’s shirt, and for veshti, (white lungi/dhoti) and lungi, soak it in soap water. Understood, stupid girl! I am sure your future in-laws will send you back with a mountain full of fusses. They will only blame me. Oh, ishwara!"(oh God!)

"Sathya, girls don’t sit like that" "Sathya, girls don’t wear shirts" "Sathya, girls don’t go out and play with boys" "Sathya, don’t walk around while you are on your period" "Sathya, learn from your sister and watch Aiyer’s daughter, how obedient and polite."

She yells Sathya more than a crow screams its own name*. My Amma is the only person who calls me a fool or idiot or stupid, while others address me as the topper in my school and brightest in my village. Well I guess, it’s her own right, like from the moment she gave birth to me, a birthright. Then there is my sister, my sweet and kind sister. She is the beauty of our village. She graduated from teacher’s training and worked in the nearest school as a science teacher. I hate to say this but she is kind of equal to me when it reaches to intelligence.

"Equal-aa? I‘m above your average brain. I clearly scored more than you in my school days. my stupid little sister." Whenever she says that she pulls my cheeks out, which is painful but I like that, It’s adorable.

And this is my family, I’m Sathya Sundarmani and just turned 18, today I passed my pre-degree in science with distinction. My father Sundarmani is a farmer who owns paddy fields and coconut plantations. My mother Maariyamma is a housewife. And my sister Suriya Sundarmani, who is 5 years older than me, works as a teacher. We had a brother between me and my sister, he was born with a weak heart and passed away when I was only six.

I guess I have to start my new adventure, pursuing my big ambition and conquering it. However, life is a giant entrance exam, we need to pass each phase to proceed to the next, so what will be my next exam, is unknown.

*Crow makes the sound Ka...Ka...Ka, and it is called Kakai/Kakam in Tamil

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