Chapter 4

Since Our Last Kiss – 3

By the time that Chizuru had finished her story, the clock showed that it was two o’clock in the morning. And all of the noise from the surrounding buildings had died down.

“Wo…ah…”

Mai threw the pillow that she was hugging to the side. Her cheeks had become flushed with excitement. Her drowsiness had long since disappeared. “Re-really…? Are you sure it wasn’t some strange dream you had because of the books you borrowed from me?”

“Uhuh. Though, there are times that I wish that it really was just a dream.”

Chizuru answered with a sad smile. It was partly true and partly a lie.

She had never thought that it would have been better if the time she spent with Lukrov was a dream. But since returning alone to this world like this, with her grandmother gone, and having to return to this normal life… Like when she had someone like Karasawa in front of her. Those were the times that she felt things would be so much easier if it had all been a dream.

“After reading those books you lent me, I just didn’t know what to do with myself. It made me feel like telling someone no matter what.”

“Uh, huh.”

“I’m sorry that I kept this from you… But I thought that you would never believe me.”

In fact, Mai still hadn’t accepted Chizuru’s story as the truth.

Her large, adorable eyes were blinking rapidly as she stared at her. Chizuru understood how she must feel, that was why she had kept this a secret for so long, in spite of them being best friends.

No matter how pleasant something may appear in a novel, having that reality ****** before your eyes would show you the many hardships of the world. Having to accept all of that was neither pleasant nor dreamlike.

“I’ll believe you… I believe you Chizuru. I wouldn’t believe it if it came from anyone else, but I’ll believe it from you.”

When Mai’s voice finally broke the long silence, it had an uncertain ring to it, as if she were trying to convince herself. But she wasn’t lying. Chizuru was relieved and gently patted Mai on the shoulder.

“Thank you. For listening.”

“Come on, that’s nothing to thank me for.”

“Maybe not. But I’m glad that you believe me.”

“Oh, right. But…”

It was as if there were too many things she wanted to say, too many questions to ask. Mai looked up at the ceiling and took her time as she chose her next words. “This Lukrov guy. I’m sure that he must have really loved you. I wonder what he has been doing since you disappeared.”

Chizuru felt her insides tense as she heard this innocent question.

“I don’t know… Maybe, he has already forgotten about me.”

“Don’t be stupid. Even you know that that is a lie.”

“He, he wasn’t a womanizer, but he attracted attention from them. And the women in that world were very beautiful. Perhaps he just saw me as an oddity and was humoring me.”

Even while she was there, there were times when such doubts entered her heart.

With that said, Chizuru was treated well by not just Lukrov, but her other comrades. But what if that was only because of her calling? As for Lukrov… What if his interest had sprouted from curiosity, and that had only grown into something that resembled love.

She had been so important to him, that such thoughts would start to enter her mind.

Because it was almost unreal.

But perhaps the idea of trying to separate events that felt real or unreal in another world was a mistake.

“That’s not possible. Not that I actually saw anything, but I’m sure you are wrong. You always talk about things too modestly. It makes me think that things were much more intense than you said.”

Mai rejected Chizuru’s uncertainty with finality.

“Um… Well, that…”

Thinking back. He wasn’t called the ‘Knight of Blaze’ for nothing.

Normally, he was calm to the point of appearing cold, but when he entered the field, he would transform. Like a ravenous fire licking the drylands. His love was no different. Chizuru had seen him as a cold man with no interest in women, but then…

“You’re probably right…”

Several memories raced through her mind and Chizuru felt her cheeks flush.

The temperature of her body had risen suddenly. While so far away, he was still able to have an effect on her. That was how intense he could be.

“I see, I see. Wow.”

Mai said as if guessing what she was thinking. Then she got up and sat right next to Chizuru. “So, what do you want to do? Do you want him to stay a memory? Or do you…want to return?”

As she got closer, Chizuru could smell a scent from around Mai’s neck.

It was the soap scented cologne that Mai had used since high school. A mild but sweet, nostalgic scent.

Chizuru felt a sense of guilt and looked to the floor.

“I want to return…I think. Now that grandma has passed away, there is no reason left for me to stay… Of course, I would be sad if I couldn’t meet you anymore.”

There was a long silence before Mai mumbled, “I see.”

“Yeah, I know. I think that I would feel the same if I were you. It will be sad to not meet you or my family anymore, but…”

But.

But, that was what it meant to fall in love with someone.

There were times when your love for someone held a greater power than anything else in the world. As a woman, Mai understood her feelings. Neither of them said anything else, but deep down, they understood each other.

“…I guess the problem is how you are going to get back. When you heard that ‘voice,’ was it in a specific place or situation?”

“No, nothing like that. It was always sudden, like it just slid into my head.”

“And it’s a woman’s voice?”

“Uhh, you might hear it like that, but sometimes it sounded like a man…as well. It was a very androgynous voice. You know, like those machines that change your voice through a microphone. It sounds a little unreal, and unnatural.”

“Hmm…”

The time was now past two o’clock in the morning, but neither of them was tired.

Chizuru was thinking back on the mysterious ‘voice’ that had called her to the other world. It was the summer of her last year in high school. Three times she had heard this voice calling to her before she had actually gone. And one year ago, in the other world, she had again heard the voice. It had asked her if she wished to return.

Return to her original world, where her grandmother had worried about her so much, that her heart disease had worsened.

The voice told her that this was her only chance to return. Thinking about her grandmother, her own family, Chizuru had nodded her ascent without thinking…on that fateful day.

She did not even have time to say goodbye to Lukrov.

“…Since then, I have not heard that ‘voice’ even once. But still, I can’t help but feel that things won’t end this way. But maybe it is just a wishful thought. But,”

But, she couldn’t forget it.

His sad eyes when last she saw him.

She didn’t want that as memory.

That last kiss they shared that was so gentle.

Mai ended up falling asleep on the mattress after a while, and so Chizuru lay down next to her and stared through the darkness at the small light bulb in the ceiling.

The small two-room apartment appeared faintly in her vision.

There was her bed, and while the room looked modern, there was a small table that doubled as a kotatsu. She had a tv and refrigerator as well. A calendar hung on the wall. All of these things were a part of her daily life.

And yet, before she knew what was happening, all of these things began to feel foreign to her. Especially on nights like these, where memories of Lukrov would return to her.

In that other world, the culture was something that would be called medieval back here.

There was no electricity, no cars, no running water, and of course no methods of transmitting information such as television or the internet. The only thing they had was animal hide that was used like paper to write on. And many people could not even read.

As was common in the western world during the middle ages, there was rank and class and knighthood. Lukrov himself had originated as the heir of a baron. War had made an orphan of him, and he had made himself a knight who could stand alone.

And so when she had first met him, she saw a youth with eyes so sharp and a face so severe, that just touching him seemed like it would cut your skin.

His hair was jet black, as were his eyes. His facial features were angular and while he had the overall appearance of a western man, his skin was quite tanned. His height… How tall had he been? She did not even know if they had units for measuring a person’s height there. But she thought that it must be close to 185 cm. A head taller the Chizuru.

Thinking back now, she did not know his birthday, his blood type…

It made her realize just how full of information the modern world she lived in was. Things were much more primitive in the other world. When people loved each other, having each others’ bodies was enough. There was no ritual dating.

Lukrov had accepted her, and she had shown him what she was capable of.

A thrill had run through their core like electricity…and it was the beginning of everything. She doubted that Lukrov had ever considered watching her from afar, or worried about being rejected.

“You are the one I chose.”

With those words alone, he swore eternal love. Like a wolf who has found his mate.

And yet, there was comfort in the way he loved. Without shame or dishonor, an unending desire led by his soul and his instincts… That kind of love.

She was sure that in this world, at least in modern Japan, that being loved in that way and loving in turn, was not possible. The very way that people lived was too different. It was as obvious as anything.

The sky was covered in a dark cloud on the following day. Mai had checked the weather report on her phone before leaving and said that there would be strong rain from the afternoon on.

Chizuru put on a beige cardigan and a modest black skirt and white shirt before heading out to work, a little later than usual. Employees were allowed to dress casually. It was an open environment where men did not have to wear suits during the summer, but Chizuru did not pay as much attention to fashion as the other women who worked here.

She felt that as long as you did not stray too far from what was current and kept yourself clean, then that was enough. She also felt no need to attract the opposite sex, and so she did the bare minimum in terms of makeup.

And yet men like Karasawa, her superior, would still appear now and again.

She was not always aware of it, but Chizuru did have the kind of pretty face that drew more attention than most. Her height was not too short and not too tall. Her body was slender and yet full where it mattered. To put it plainly, she was on the popular side.

Chizuru made sure that the fold-up umbrella was inside of her bag as she rushed into her companies building. But just as she passed the automatic doors at the entrance, she felt a sudden sense of vertigo.

(…What?)

Perhaps it was anemia from a lack of sleep.

She felt dizzy as her head swayed to the side, then a numbing sensation shot up her limbs. Chizuru had always had low blood pressure, so these symptoms would occasionally appear during the morning. She had been so absorbed in her talk with Mai, that she had only gotten a few hours of sleep. That must have been the reason, she thought.

However, when she managed to stand still and lean her head against the frame of the entrance, a sudden ringing pierced into her ears out of nowhere.

There was something otherworldly about it. It existed only in Chizuru’s head, this sharp echo that merged with the bustling noises of the office building.

(Was this)

Chizuru’s heart pounded with undisguised excitement.

She remembered this feeling. She remembered this sound…

(This, this!)

Without thinking, she pressed her palms against her ears as she tried to calm her impatient breathing. And still, the familiar and mysterious sound continued to echo in her head. Not only that, but it seemed to be getting louder. It was so strong that she knew she could not be imagining it.

At the same time, other employees and office workers who were coming in late saw her. They glanced with suspicious eyes as Chizuru stood there, but they left her alone. None of them could hear.

Yes, she remembered it.

It was like this the first time. After this sharp ringing, a ‘voice’ would follow…

“Chizu…ru…”

“Hey, Ayase!?”

The sound stopped. Just like a bubble that has abruptly burst.

At the same time, someone’s hand was firmly on her shoulder, and Chizuru raised her head frantically. And then she saw that Karasawa was standing next to her, his eyebrows narrowed in an expression of concern. His head was tilted to the side as he peered into her face.

“Oh…”

Chizuru breathed without thinking.

“What is it? Why are you standing here this morning? Does your head hurt?”

There was an exaggerated concern in his voice. A white shirt and gray necktie peeked out from his dark blue suit. The faint remnants of morning aftershave floated in the air. Chizuru felt herself being pulled back to reality.

“S-sorry. I uh, a friend slept over at my place last night. I didn’t get much sleep… It’s just a slight headache.”

She hadn’t lied.

But she hadn’t told the whole truth either.

She straightened her posture and forced a smile. Karasawa stared at her as if considering whether or not he was satisfied by this explanation. But he finally shrugged in defeat.

“Do you want to go to the medical office?”

“Uh, no. It is really just a mild headache. I have low blood pressure. It happens sometimes. I’m fine now.”

“If you think so…”

Karasawa’s hand lightly touched her back as if pushing her. “We’ll go up together. Don’t faint on me, alright?”

Chizuru cringed when she felt the large hand on her back. But before she could move away from him, he had adeptly maneuvered her towards the elevator.

There were many around them, and it was possible that he was genuinely concerned about her state. But still, Chizuru felt something warm when he touched her back. Something like affection or passion.

The ‘voice’ was long gone.

The familiar chime of the elevator indicated that it had arrived, and the door opened. Chizuru and Karasawa entered the box as if being sucked into the crowd of people inside.

At the moment before the doors closed, Chizuru looked over the other shoulders towards the entrance of the building, her stare was full of longing.

What had that been, just now?

It was just like the feeling she had had on the summer of last year. But it was so brief.

Was this just her imagination playing tricks on her after the excitement of telling Mai her story? Or was it…?

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