Episode 4

I remember the first time I ever got my heart broken.

It was my freshmen year at high school and I thought it was going to be the year of changes, new friends, and opportunities. It was going to be the year I reinvented myself and became someone different. I thought it was going to be everything I ever wanted.

It was supposed to be all that stuff the middle school staff tries to sell you.

So when Nate Hook, sophomore captain of the soccer team, finally asked me out after months of flirting, I thought with everything he was the one.

I fell for the whole 'first love' crap everyone talks about. Nate Hook was in that moment of my life everything I could ever want.

I believed every line he ever told me, soaked up the sweet little nothings he whispered in my ear, and would follow him around as if I was his little lap dog. I told anyone who was willing to listen to my idiotic thoughts that me and Nate would be together forever.

That we were the real thing.

In highschool love is made out to be this epic thing. It's the thing everyone wants and when you get, you believe it's going to last forever. You suddenly start thinking about stupid silly things like meeting his parents and valentines day.

Sure, it was a little bit of a stretch back then, but I believed it. Why else would Nate tell me he loved me? Why else would he tell me we were going to last? I seriously trusted the guy with everything in me. His friends were my friends.

Everything I did, he did.

I used to stay up late like those lovesick girls and write his name in my diary and wake up every morning to these sweet little good morning text messages. He was as much in love with me as I was in love with him.

What changed you might ask?

What made the guy I thought I loved so much destroy the one thing I counted on?

He, like every guy after, all wanted one thing from me and when I didn't give it up so easily, they all left and would never come back.

I was stupid and thought maybe if I just gave up my virginity to a guy I thought deserved it, then maybe he would stick around and be the guy I wanted him to be. That, just maybe, the problem wasn't them but me.

Stupid right?

That all changed with Jake.

Every. Single. Thing.

My junior year I ended up meeting him in the grocery store . It was a chance accident that turned into something I thought was magical. I was no longer scared Freshmen Kelsey. No, I was different. I thought I knew better.

Jake was there for me every moment of the day and when school got let out, he would be waiting for me even though he went to a different high school at the time. He would shower me with compliments. Shower me with what I thought was his love.

When the night came and I gave myself to him, followed by me saying those three little words 'I love you' , he took off and never talked to me since.

He got his payback though when Mia and I went to the club Majestic and Aiden ended up punching him in the face. It was deserved payback since he lead me on to believe he loved me. And even if he did, the fact that he ran away like a coward and into the arms of another girl warrants Aiden punching him.

Hey, if I could, I would find him again and punch him in the face myself. I'm not a violent person, but he could bring out the worst in me.

I have no idea why I'm thinking of all this messed up shit while staring at Julio, but the way he was smirking at me just reminded me that he probably has done the same thing to so many other girls.

How many girls has he left behind, thinking he cared? How many girls did he promise forever to yet left without so much as a blink?

I know I'm holding up the line, but I don't really care. He's still staring at me and I just stand here and look back like an idiot. When neither of us say anything, I decide to speak first.

"I don't like you."

I state for the second time that day. It wasn't that I didn't like him, it's what he stood for that I didn't like. His lips twitch at the corner of his mouth as if he was trying to hide a smile that was threatening to appear.

"I could swear angel you already told me that."

I lean forward on the counter and he matches my movement so that now there was only about six inches separating my lips from his.

Why my mind was on Julio Hernandez's lips, I have no idea.

He smiles as if he could read my mind and he says in a soft whisper. "But you see Miss Mays; I think it is just a cover up. In reality you have this burning passion for me and if you could, you would tear my clothes apart and have me right now."

He was mocking me and he and I both knew it. I smile slowly and lean closer till his breath breaks against my lips. I look him up and down, as slow as I can, and then look him straight in the eyes and say:

"I've seen better."

I straighten out and he raises an eyebrow at me. I raise one right back, daring him to say something, when he suddenly jerks his gaze over my shoulder.

I peek behind me to see what has suddenly caught his attention when I notice that it was the guy who was still staring at me. Now he's closer than before and his eyes are solely looking at my V-neck shirt.

Julio follows the guys gaze and looks with a quick flick of his eyes. While the guy in line seems entrapped by my cleavage, Julio barely registers it.

Okay...

Julio nods his head to the kid and the kids eyes leave my chest as he turns toward Julio's hard gaze and locked jaw.

"Sorry kid, but the shows not for free. That's my girl you are looking at. So, if you want something to stare at, maybe you should go check some magazine stands. If you know what I mean."

The kid doesn't say anything as he quickly turns around, pushes through the line, and fast walks out the front door without bothering to look back one time. I turn back to Julio and he throws a rag over his shoulder and winks at.

"No need to thank me. No wait, if you do want to thank me, I have a few ideas on how you could."

He grins as if he could see the ideas happening right now and I winkle my nose and hold up three fingers.

"Three things are wrong with that sentence buddy. One being that I would never touch you,"

"We'll see about that," Julio butts in and I shake my head and continue on with my speech as if he never talked in the first place. Touching my fingers together, I continue.

"Two, I'm not your anything, so maybe next time don't be giving people the idea."

I stop for a moment, trying to think of my third reason and Julio cocks an eyebrow, waiting for me to continue on with my rant. I just drop my hand and then bring it back up to wave it in the air. How this guy can make me forget what I'm thinking is beyond me.

"I don't like you."

I just say out of annoyance and his soft laughter seems to carry around the whole Café. Unlike Nick, his laugh isn't boyish or sweet. It's dark, deep, and enticing. It's the kind of laugh people will stop to listen too. '

I stand still as he looks me up and down while rubbing his hands on the towel on his shoulder. When he gets to hard gaze he just shakes his head, a small smile on his face.

"So you say angel, so you say."

I'm thinking of something witty to say back, something that will totally bring him down a peg, when I feel someone poke my shoulder rather hardly.

I turn and look down to see a girl about fifteen staring up at me, her hands on her hips. I can tell by the straight, tense line of her mouth that what she is about to say isn't going to be nice.

"Can you like hurry up and make an order already?Some of us have places to be."

Well then.

I turn to Julio, make mine, Mia's, and Aiden's orders, and hurry out of the line without taking one look back. I was just like the kid who was staring at me earlier. Intimated by Julio.

This doesn't mean I didn't want to look back though. I could feel Julio's hot gaze scorch my back and watch me the whole way to the booth. honestly, the whole time I wanted to turn around and watch him back.

This was stupid. Really, really freaking stupid.

I slump in my seat and am so busy thinking about Julio and his condescending smile that I didn't notice the big sparkly glitter bug next to me. I look up and see Kayla smiling down at me and I just shake my head, giving up.

"Just when I think I am free of idiots, I am greeted to another. Not that you're an idiot per say.. just whatever. " Kayla frowns and runs a hand through her purple streaked hair.

"Did you just call me an idiot?"

"I think she did." Mia pipes in, offering help, and I shoot her a dark look. She smiles proudly and lays her head on Aiden's shoulder. Aiden starts to twirl a piece of hair that escaped her bun around his finger, his eyes more on his handiwork then us.

"What took you so long anyways?" Mia asks and I peek over my shoulder to see Julio making drinks, a slight frown on his face. It was obvious that his confidence only appeared as an act when I was in front of him.

He had no idea what he was doing. Though to be honest it doesn't really surprise me. When I turn back to answer Mia, she catches the small movement. She raises her eyebrows and when she lifts her head a little and sees Julio, she gives me this big ole' smile.

Whatever. I didn't have the hots for Julio.

Kayla looks at my hair and she touches the red beanie. "Ohhhh, who gave you that?" I move her hand off the beanie and she seems to get this love sick look in her eyes. Mia straightens out and leans her cheek on her open palm.

"Yeah, spill love bug. Who is this mystery beanie guy and why is he giving you his beanie?"

"Yeah," Kayla cuts in. "Tell us he's hot."

"And muscular." Mia continues.

"And smart," Kayla ahpremends.

"And totally drool worthy on so many sexy levels that it will hurt to even look at him." Mia sighs dreamingly and Kayla bumps her fist with Mia's in appreciation. Apparently making fun of me is he new thing right now.

Aiden at all three of us for a few seconds before shaking his head sadly. He suddenly starts to run a hand through his hair, his lips turning down slightly at the side.

"This is why a guy needs guy time. This is just sad." He mutters and Mia just pushes his face while still looking at me. I look from both Kayla's and Mia's eager stares and throw my hands in the air, giving up yet again.

Could a girl just talk to a guy without it meaning something?

"I don't like anybody. No guy and especially not the kid who gave me the beanie."

I point to it harshly and Mia seems to be amused by my outbreak and Kayla was hiding a smile behind her hand. "And," I say louder, looking at Mia hard.

"I don't like that little Mexican boy over there." I swing my hand out to point at Julio when my hand hits something hard and warm.

My hand drops fast and my eyes travel over the body at the end of the table and I meet dark eyes and a devil may care smile.

Julio stares down at me and I swallow hard, trying to hide my sudden embarrassment. I was not going to blush. Mortification can only go so far.

Mia and Kayla try to hide their laughs, but it doesn't work. Julio sits down the mugs of coffee he made and continues to look at me not even once letting his gaze waver.

"This little Mexican begs to differ." He looks at everyone at the table and lays his hand on my head. "This girl can't keep her hands off me." I jerk his hand off my head by moving to my right and his hand just as quickly drops to my shoulder.

I look at the hand and then to him and he just raises an eyebrow. I know he's daring me to move his hand and I just roll my eye.

Sighing, I grab his hand to get it off me and when I do, he captures it and threads his fingers through mine. Sudden warmth spreads up my hand and down my arm. The last time I held a guys hand was two years ago.

I almost forget how could it feels.

He looks back to everyone at the table and brings his and my hand, which was still connected might I add, up to show everyone. They all look at our passionate embrace as if it's jesus himself.

"See? All over me."

I let out a disgusted sound and jerk my hand back and Julio lets me. He brings his now empty hand to his front pocket and lays it there, relaxed. I glare at him but he doesn't bother looking at me.

"You're too conceded for your own good."

"Who can be conceded with looks like mine?" He widens his eyes, trying to come off as vulnerable and naive, but he doesn't fool anyone.

Did this guy seriously think he was being funny? I glance down at my hand that was in his and see a little bit of sweat from his hand sparkle on mine.

Julio is busy talking to Aiden, but he glances at me for a moment and when he sees me staring at my hand in what he thinks is longing, his lips tip up at the corner.

I show him my palm and make it a point to let him see me wipe it extra hard and extra slow on my jeans. While it might have felt nice to have his hand on mine, it didn't mean he had to know it.

He would probably gloat for weeks.

Mia has her hands connected on the table and her chin was resting on her intertwined fingers. Let's just say the smile on her face plainly says that she was enjoying the show.

I stick my tongue out at her and she sticks it out right back. I lean forward, to whisper to her that she's crazy, when I notice Kayla checking out Julio.

I frown a little when I see her mouth curve into her signature man eating smile. I cast my eyes to Julio to see if I can see what she saw and that is the first time that I really take him in.

His black hair is wild and messy. It kind of remind me of a ravens feathers. All sleek and dark. The same 'I don't care' look from this morning is all over it. Like I said, Julio has beautiful hair. My eyes travel from his hair, down the week old subtle, to his uniform.

The short sleeved shirt he had on gives me access to his many tattoos and I stare at them. You can't help it. It's like Julio wants you to look at them instead of anything else.

I see one of a snake running up and around his bicep and some kind of eye on the inside of his wrist. I know he has three or four more on his other arm and I begin to wonder where else he has a tattoo.

He smiles lightly at something Aiden says, showing his perfect white teeth and the outline of his hard and strong jawline. If his smile got any bigger, a dimple would pop out right where his cheek and jaw meet.

My eyes there way back up to his face, over his nose, and to his eyes.

They weren't some beautiful color or anything. Just a normal, mundane brown. But they were a kind of brown that seemed to shoot through you and uncover all of your little secrets. If he took the time to actually scrutinize you, he could get you to spill all your lies with just one look.

My hand absentmindedly runs over my shoulder and I think of the tattoo I have there. Mia, Kayla and I all got matching tattoo's for my birthday a few years back and I think of it now while looking at Julio.

Wait, wait, why was I looking at him?

I cast my eyes away and look back to my sister. Even though I don't want Julio, like Mia seems to believe already, I get a little pang of jealousy in my gut. A little seed of envy that plants itself in my mind.

I know Kayla is his type and she could have him in a minute if she wanted too.

I look down at the table, not wanting to see the whole thing play out. Why would Julio still want me once Kayla turns that winning smile his way? It's just the way it is. I feel my sister's hair brush against my arm and I watched her lean over and bring her hand out to Julio.

When he notices her hand, he quickly takes it, ending his conversation with Aiden.

"The names Kayla and you are?"

Julio supplies her with a small smile and says his name. She flips her hair, showing him her sparkly outfit, and Julio's eyes follow the motion. I swallow the lump forming in my throat and wait for the punch line.

"I was wondering, Julio, if you would like to hang out after you finished with your job?"

And there it was.

Julio doesn't look at her, instead his eyes land on me. I don't know why, but I meet them anyway. In a space of a few heartbeats his look says everything I need to know. He isn't hear to please my sister, but instead to win over me.

He turns his smoldering look back to Kayla and shakes his head. "Nah, I got a heavy shift."

I look at the floor fast and smile a little. Not because I suddenly want Julio, because for once a guy has chosen me instead of her. I hear Kayla let out an annoyed sound and she moves back to her side of the booth.

"I'll leave you guys to your drinks...Miss Mays."

I look up at Julio saying my name and he smiles and bows his head a little. It's the kind of bow some guy from a Jane Austen novel would do. It was beyond cheesy.

"I'll see you in Physics on Monday. Let's try not to get kicked out this time, shall we?" He sends me a private wink, turns on his heel , and walks away. I stare after him, my mouth threatening to drop.

I had no idea I shared my Physics class with him and I have no idea how he even knew it in the first place. I hear Kayla let out another annoyed sigh and I turn to see her pout her lower lip.

"He was cute. Like really cute. I wish he was in my Physics class." I laugh and bring my finger to her lower lip and push the pouted thing in.

"You don't even have a Physics class." She throws her hands on the table and looks at all of us seriously, her eyes wide.

"Yeah, but he is enough to make me want to join a Physics class."

"If someone says physics one more time, I'm leaving." Mia says and I just shake my head the same time Aiden furrow his eyebrows in thought.

"Julio isn't really the type of guy for you Kayla. He um, doesn't really like to make commitments."

Kayla looks at him as if he was stupid.

Really, it was the stupidest thing to say.

"That is why he is perfect. I know my prince is out there somewhere and it obviously isn't him. So, I think I should have fun and..."

I let Kayla tell her story about how she thinks her true love is out there somewhere and I look at the table and think about Aiden's words.

Julio isn't the kind of guy to make commitments.

That's why I should stay away from him that much more.

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