When Love Hurts First.

When Love Hurts First.

A New Beginning or an End?

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The world outside was still wrapped in the whispers of dawn. A soft, golden glow stretched across the sky, blending into hues of lavender and pink, painting the horizon like a fragile dream. The silence that filled the air was heavyโ€”๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐—ธ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ฑ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฎ๐˜ ๐—ฐ๐—ฎ๐—ฟ๐—ฟ๐—ถ๐—ฒ๐—ฑ ๐—ฝ๐—ฒ๐—ฎ๐—ฐ๐—ฒโ€ฆ ๐—ผ๐—ฟ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐—ถ๐—น๐—น๐˜‚๐˜€๐—ถ๐—ผ๐—ป ๐—ผ๐—ณ ๐—ถ๐˜.
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๐—” ๐—ฏ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ๐—ฎ๐˜๐—ต ๐—ฏ๐—ฒ๐˜๐˜„๐—ฒ๐—ฒ๐—ป ๐—ป๐—ถ๐—ด๐—ต๐˜ ๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ฑ ๐—บ๐—ผ๐—ฟ๐—ป๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด.
Inside the dimly lit room, time seemed frozen. The walls stood still, the curtains swayed slightly with the morning breeze, yet everything felt suffocating. The weight of the past night still hung in the air like an unshakable shadow.
A lone figure lay curled in the vastness of the bed, small, fragileโ€”yet carrying an unbearable weight.
๐—”๐—ฑ๐˜ƒ๐—ถ๐—ธ๐—ฎ.
Her eyelashes fluttered as consciousness pulled her back, her swollen lids struggling to open. The golden rays of sunlight slowly crept in through the half-open window, stretching towards her face, almost as if trying to comfort her. ๐—ง๐—ผ๐—ผ ๐—ฝ๐˜‚๐—ฟ๐—ฒ. ๐—ง๐—ผ๐—ผ ๐—ธ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ฑ. ๐—ง๐—ผ๐—ผ ๐˜‚๐—ป๐—ฑ๐—ฒ๐˜€๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ๐—ฑ.
The moment the warmth kissed her skin, something inside her shattered. A single tear slipped past her lashes. ๐—ง๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ป ๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ผ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ฟ. ๐—”๐—ป๐—ฑ ๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ผ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ฟ.
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She didn't even try to stop them.
Advika Nair.
Advika Nair.
W- why are there still tears left in me? (cracking voice)
Advika Nair.
Advika Nair.
H... Ha... Havenโ€™t I cried enough? (chuckled after reminding her condition)
A tremor ran through her fingers as she lifted her hand, her touch hesitant, as if afraid of confirming that she was still real. That last night hadnโ€™t stolen the last piece of her.
Her heart pounded as she turned her head slightly. ๐—ง๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ ๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐˜„๐—ฎ๐˜€.
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The man beside her.
๐—›๐—ฒ๐—ฟ ๐—ต๐˜‚๐˜€๐—ฏ๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ฑ.
The one who was supposed to love her. The one she had loved. Or she still do.
The man who had ruined her.
His back was turned towards her, his bare skin rising and falling with steady, unbothered breaths. He looked at peace. As if last night had never happened. As if the horrors he had inflicted on her had left no scars. As if she hadnโ€™t spent the night drowning in the wreckage of what was supposed to be love.
A sharp, painful breath left her lips.
Advika Nair.
Advika Nair.
Kyu? ("Whyโ€ฆ?")
Her throat burned. Her lips trembled. The question was a storm inside her.
Advika Nair.
Advika Nair.
My husbandโ€ฆ the man I gave my heart to.
Advika Nair.
Advika Nair.
"Toh phirโ€ฆ yeh kya tha? Jo kal raat ko hua?" (Thenโ€ฆ what was this? Which happened last night)
Her voice was a shattered whisper, lost in the rush of water.
Her fingers curled into the blanket, gripping the fabric tightly, trying to hold onto somethingโ€”anything. But ๐—ถ๐˜ ๐—ฑ๐—ถ๐—ฑ ๐—ป๐—ผ๐˜๐—ต๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐˜๐—ผ ๐˜€๐˜๐—ผ๐—ฝ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐—ฎ๐—ฐ๐—ต๐—ฒ.
The way his grip had bitten into her skin. The way her pleas had dissolved into the dark. The way he had looked at herโ€”like she was nothing.
Advika Nair.
Advika Nair.
Th-the bruises on my skin will fadeโ€ฆ but what about the ones inside me? (low voice almost like mind words)
Her mind whispered questions she couldnโ€™t answer.
A sob wrenched itself free from her chest, but she choked it back, pressing a fist to her mouth.
Advika Nair.
Advika Nair.
"No. No more sounds. N-no more"
Furthermore, she swallowed the sob clawing at her throat. She wanted to scream. She wanted to cry. She wanted to feel anything other than this hollow emptiness inside her.
๐—›๐—ฒ๐—ฟ ๐˜ƒ๐—ถ๐˜€๐—ถ๐—ผ๐—ป ๐—ฏ๐—น๐˜‚๐—ฟ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ๐—ฑ, but through her tears, a cruel realization formed in her mind.
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But ๐—ฆ๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐—ฑ๐—ฟ๐—ฎ๐—ด๐—ด๐—ฒ๐—ฑ ๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐˜€๐—ฒ๐—น๐—ณ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐—ฏ๐—ฎ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฟ๐—ผ๐—ผ๐—บ, her legs unsteady, her body a map of bruises she couldnโ€™t see. The tiles were cold beneath her knees as she crumpled under the shower, the water already runningโ€”icy, punishing.
Advika Nair.
Advika Nair.
"K- kya yahi sadhi ka matalab hota hai?" (I-is this what marriage means?)
Advika Nair.
Advika Nair.
Am I justโ€ฆ a body? (Try to wipe her tears Harshly while dragging herself)
A shudder passed through her as she forced herself to move. The cold floor sent a chill up her spine, but she barely felt it. Her body ached, but the pain in her heart was far worse.
She didnโ€™t look at him again. ๐—ฆ๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐—ฐ๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—น๐—ฑ๐—ปโ€™๐˜.
She just walked.
Away from the bed.
Away from him.
Away from the ๐—ป๐—ถ๐—ด๐—ต๐˜๐—บ๐—ฎ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ.
The bathroom door clicked shut behind her, sealing her inside a space where no one could see her break.
With trembling fingers, she turned the shower on. The water crashed against the tiles, its warmth a cruel contrast to the iciness inside her. She stepped under it, her legs giving out as she sank to the floor, hugging her knees to her chest.
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Advika Nair.
Advika Nair.
"yeh kya ho gaya"? (what has happened)
The water rushed over her, soaking her, but it could never wash away the filth she felt inside.
Advika Nair.
Advika Nair.
Abhi to mere sadhi ko hue ek din hi hue hain aur ye sab... (It has just been a day to my marriage and all thisโ€ฆ)
Her nails dug into her arms as a sob finally tore past her lips, raw and broken.
Advika Nair.
Advika Nair.
Kya aab yahi meri kismat hai... Mai-main... Aab kabhi pahle jaise nahi rah paungi kya? (Is this my faith nowโ€ฆ May-I will never be able to live like before?)
Advika Nair.
Advika Nair.
Will h-he ever understand me?
Tears mixed with the spray, her body shaking with silent cries. ๐—ฆ๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐—ฐ๐—น๐˜‚๐˜๐—ฐ๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ฑ ๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ฟ ๐—ธ๐—ป๐—ฒ๐—ฒ๐˜€ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ฟ ๐—ฐ๐—ต๐—ฒ๐˜€๐˜, ๐—ฟ๐—ผ๐—ฐ๐—ธ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐—ฏ๐—ฎ๐—ฐ๐—ธ ๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ฑ ๐—ณ๐—ผ๐—ฟ๐˜๐—ต, ๐—ฎ๐˜€ ๐—ถ๐—ณ ๐˜€๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐—ฐ๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—น๐—ฑ ๐˜€๐—ผ๐—บ๐—ฒ๐—ต๐—ผ๐˜„ ๐—ต๐—ผ๐—น๐—ฑ ๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐˜€๐—ฒ๐—น๐—ณ ๐˜๐—ผ๐—ด๐—ฒ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ฟ
Advika Nair.
Advika Nair.
Will I ever get love?
Advika Nair.
Advika Nair.
Will a-anyone ever love me with heart? (Brushed into tears)
Advika Nair.
Advika Nair.
Ahem.... Ahem....
.
โ”ŒSomewhere in the worldโ”˜
.
Someone had just sunk into the bed, the body craving rest, but peace remained a distant, unreachable dream.
๐—ง๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ป, ๐—ถ๐˜ ๐—ฏ๐—ฒ๐—ด๐—ฎ๐—ป.
A thin layer of sweat gathered on their foreheadโ€”unbidden, unsettling. As if the very air carried whispers of something unseen, something unwelcome. ๐—” ๐—ฝ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ๐˜€๐—ฒ๐—ป๐—ฐ๐—ฒ. ๐—” ๐—บ๐—ฒ๐—บ๐—ผ๐—ฟ๐˜†. ๐—” ๐˜€๐—ต๐—ฎ๐—ฑ๐—ผ๐˜„ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฎ๐˜ ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ๐—ณ๐˜‚๐˜€๐—ฒ๐—ฑ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—ณ๐—ฎ๐—ฑ๐—ฒ.
The breath wavered. The eyelids fluttered, rolling in restless discomfort. Sleep should have come easily, yet it remained elusive, taunting. ๐—ง๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐—ฐ๐—ผ๐—น๐—ฑ ๐—ฎ๐—ถ๐—ฟ ๐—ผ๐—ณ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐—”๐—– ๐—ธ๐—ถ๐˜€๐˜€๐—ฒ๐—ฑ of the skin, but instead of relief, a suffocating heat wrapped around, clinging, refusing to let go.
A bead of sweat trickled down their temple. Their pulse quickened. The chest heavedโ€”shallow, desperate gasps followed by deep, aching gulps of air.
๐—ง๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ป, ๐—ฎ ๐˜€๐˜‚๐—ฑ๐—ฑ๐—ฒ๐—ป ๐—ท๐—ผ๐—น๐˜.
someone
someone
(Jerked open eyes, Huffing in panic and sweating heavily even in AC on)
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The body ๐—ท๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐—ธ๐—ฒ๐—ฑ ๐—ฎ๐˜„๐—ฎ๐—ธ๐—ฒ. Eyes snapped open, wide, frantic, lost. The pounding in the chest was deafening, a frantic rhythm of something unspoken, something forgottenโ€”๐—ผ๐—ฟ ๐—ฝ๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐—ต๐—ฎ๐—ฝ๐˜€, ๐˜€๐—ผ๐—บ๐—ฒ๐˜๐—ต๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐˜„๐—ฎ๐—ถ๐˜๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—ฏ๐—ฒ ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ๐—บ๐—ฒ๐—บ๐—ฏ๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ๐—ฑ.
.
To be continued...
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His eyes are so beautiful...

2025-04-02

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I believe someone will...โค๏ธโ€๐Ÿฉน

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