Chapter 5

Eren was still murmuring words to himself but he let himself kneel between Levi's legs, to be pulled into Levi's arms, to be comforted. Levi's arms were around his shoulders and his right hand held Eren's head on his chest. From this proximity, Eren choked up as he heard the steady thumps of Levi's heart. It balanced him, anchored him. Feeling a lump in his throat, Eren pulled away looking at the ground as he stood in front of the person who'd either be his harbor or killer.

Eren finally confessed. He looked away, reluctant to face Levi's disdain.

Eren willed himself to stay still as he saw Levi's boots step in front of him. He's grateful that Levi helped him regain his composure and somewhat comforted him. But he needed to tell him what he'd done. This was why he's given this chance.

Eren clenched his fists. He's given a chance to fix things and to be liberated. When he left the future to what some might call fate, he died. A lot of people suffered, and he's the cause. Now, Eren decided to face the future without the crappy guidance of the so-called fate. He'd resist fate and tear it apart.

Eren admitted looking directly in the gunmetal eyes that spelled murder.

Levi chimed in, crossing his arms. Knowing the Captain for many years made Eren receptive to his tones when speaking even if almost all of it sounded the same. Currently, Levi's testing him. Whether he pushed through or backed off.

Eren couldn't back off this time. Recalling the days when he lived in a hell where humanity's destined to be eaten and caged by titans, he glared with the same intensity at Levi, of the time when he's questioned if he could truly dedicate his heart for humanity.

Levi advanced but this time, Eren countered. He guarded using both hands against Levi's fists.

Eren raised his voice, legs planted wide.

Eren slapped Levi's hands away to grab the older man by the collar and leaned closer.

Levi scowled from being man-handled but Eren didn't care. He needed to let it out.

Eren let go. At the same time, a blow landed on his cheek making him stagger. Levi fixed his collar before clicking his tongue.

Eren almost let his guard down at the fondness that erupted in his chest at the familiar sound.

Levi said, as if Eren wasn't screaming in his face seconds ago. Eren almost admired how the Captain didn't easily get carried away by emotions. Almost.

Levi leaned back as he casually asked the question Eren was trying to avoid. The Captain's gaze demanded for an answer Eren refused to say this early in the game.

Levi also slumped down, sitting on the ground. Eren sat down beside Levi so he didn't have to face the older man. He got better at lying and pretending, but Levi seemed to always read what's on his mind.

Odd noises came from Eren's throat while he's trying to find the right words.

Levi frowned. He didn't like the fact that his memory were blurry making it difficult to recall.

Eren had a sinking feeling in his stomach. Telling the truth might hurt him, but telling it later would hurt them both. He scratched his neck before saying

  He'd be lying if he said that he couldn't feel Levi's ire.

Levi's voice was flat and casual. It reminded him of the time when the Captain tried to tell him it wasn't his fault that the Petra and the others died. The memory of Captain Levi trying to cheer him up in his own way was more amusing now than back then.

Eren demanded. It didn't make sense that they remembered differently. After a few seconds of silence, Levi sighed.

Eren heard the softest voice that ever came out of Levi since he knew the captain.

Eren smiled as he hugged his knees closer to his chest. Biting his lip, he placed his forehead on his knee before turning his head sideways at Levi. The Captain was staring straight ahead. The light from the fire illuminated his face with an orange sheen reminding Eren of sunset by the ocean.

Levi's deep voice reached his ears. It made him shiver.

Eren subconsciously blurted out. He only realized his blunder when Levi tilted his head and their eyes met.

Levi only narrowed his eyes at his flustered words.

Eren took a deep breath without taking his eyes off his harbor.

Eren simply said, expression returning to somberness, and Levi turned his head away.

The moon was high in the night sky and Eren felt the fatigue caught up with his body. He started feeling lethargic. He finally told someone the truth. All the things he kept for years finally caught up with him. He truly felt tired. And maybe, this thing, this conversation maybe a dream, a last gift from Ymir. Because it felt surreal that he's sitting beside Captain Levi after all the things he did. But he didn't regret it, he's grateful for Ymir's whim.

Eren blinked his drowsiness away as he watched the older man tilt his head. From this angle, the gunmetal eyes reflected the reddish glow of the fire.

Eren couldn't help himself. He chuckled.

Cute.

Eren averted his eyes for a second before looking back. If he didn't, he might have done something crazy like saying it out loud. What he didn't expect was the Captain's next words.

A grin that couldn't be contained stretched on Eren's face. Just like always , he liked those words. It felt like they're back to those days when they dashed towards a single-minded goal of venturing outside the Walls without the threat of titans. As if reading his mind, Levi smiled. A little bigger than the time when Historia punched him, Eren noted.

Levi added, pursing his lips in thought. Eren felt a chill slid down his spine, watching Levi's hands carving through his hair, holding it back and then releasing.

Eren nodded off at some point. But at least, he got what he wanted. Captain Levi's not someone who went back on his words. If he said he'd clean up after Eren, it meant he'd watch over Eren. Even though they still have a lot of things to talk about, he's grateful that Levi was there.

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Once Eren woke up and saw that the captain was still sleeping, he assumed that Captain Levi probably stayed awake late in the night. While he washed the grime from his body down the river, he had time to consider his current reality. It only felt like a few hours since he used the Founder's power to destroy the world when he woke up in the past. "Eren, you're free. Once you woke up, you'll have the power to change the world." He finally remembered Ymir's last words when he saw Captain Levi's eyes. Eren wasn't lying when he said that they're in the past. However, seeing and hearing were two different things. Eren wasn't a stranger to unbelievable phenomena that happened around him. There was a time when shifting into a titan was strange an inconceivable. Physical time travel, on the other hand, overturned his perception of the world. Unimaginable power hid dormant in the Paths and for the first time, Eren had no intentions to even touch that unknown with a ten feet pole. He'd take Ymir's word that it was possible due to a combination of the power of the titans he possessed. Being able to time travel would only lead to regrets since 'what ifs' would become a possibility. Eren didn't intend to play god. But since he already received the opportunity, he'd take it. The problem was he also wasn't sure the exact place in the timeline Ymir dropped him. If Levi wasn't sent with him, Eren imagined that he'd immediately want to learn 'when' he was. Immediately rushing through the capture of the Warriors and cornering Rod Reiss would definitely be in the forefront of his priorities. Maybe, he'd also consider quietly taking out Annie, Reiner, and Berthold before dealing with Marley on his own. As he splashed cold water in his face, Eren watched as his reflection on the rippling water distorted and blurred the image of his face. Also, there must be something wrong in his head if he felt glad that Captain Levi called him a monster to his face last night. He really liked Levi's bluntness. In the future, Eren knew that some people also thought of him as a monster. It'd show on their faces, but they wouldn't tell him directly. Infuriating wasn't the right word. More of a little annoyance. That's why he preferred having those who'd point out his flaws to his face like Captain Levi and Jean to be around him. Mikasa accepted all of him including his flaws. Armin would go with the diplomatic route and hint that he's wrong in a round about way, as if he's afraid of hurting Eren's feelings. He's also tired of them babying him. Satisfied with his bath, his fingers ran through his hair to squeeze the remaining water out. Stretching his arms above his head, Eren prepared himself for the rest of the day. Mind racing, he slowly walked towards where he last left his companion.

He greeted as he came back at the forest clearing. Captain Levi was already awake sporting his usual blank face.

Eren flinched as the Captain scanned his form from his head to his toes, eyes narrowed, arms crossed, hips jutting out. As if he woke up without Eren's presence, almost thought the worst happened, and now he's waiting for him to return.

Eren raised both hands to explain. When Captain Levi's expression reverted to a scowl, he suggested.

Being caught between the desire to live and inevitable death surely did something to Eren's brain, because he wouldn't be this casual with Levi Ackerman before. Captain Levi silently shrugged before heading down the path he trekked. Unlike yesterday where both of them had too many questions and so little answers, this morning they took their time to mull over the things they needed and wanted to know. By the time they finished eating, they sat side by side in the same position they were in last night.

Eren nodded.

" Levi raised three fingers.

Eren didn't want to lie as much as possible to Captain Levi. And even though he had a concrete idea why Ymir also sent Levi to the past, Eren wouldn't say anything yet.

Levi stood before placing both hands on his hips. 

"Get up, shitty brat. Since we have no lead for the second, there's no use discussing the third. Let's solve the first problem for now. There's a small village south east from here." "And," Eren hesitated. "What will we do once we learned the year we're in?"

Levi said. Of course, he'd find Erwin Smith. Somehow, a part of Eren was irked by the simple answer so he remained sitting. Levi then turned around, frowning.

Clicking his tongue, he came back to lightly kick his hip. "Don't make me repeat myself. I'm not going to the scouts."

Eren stood with the corners of his mouth curved.

That's Not True.

Eren shrugged half-heartedly and turning away before Levi saw him blushing. Actually, for Eren, Levi would always be his Captain. Even so, he'd take every chances he's given.