Crystal Candy Fantasy waking up

[narrator]

Polli wakes up startled an out of breath.

Polli

Oh god…not another one.

[narrator]

Polli looks around in the dark trying to gather herself.

Polli

It’s the same exact one every night now.

Polli

This is somehow even worse than having different bad dreams every day.

Polli

And I have no idea what it means, if it even does.

[narrator]

Polli looks very distressed trying to figure out what her repeated night terror might be trying to tell her.

Polli

In every single one, I oddly keep seeing this guy I used to talk with years ago.

Polli

I never dated him or anything. But I used to flirt, sext, an talk virtually online on an off for awhile.

Polli

To be harshly honest he was mostly a mistake in my life, before I knew how to set boundaries.

Polli

He never particularly hurt me enough to give me nightmares this bad, though.

[narrator]

Polli scratches her head lost.

Polli

I remember last, telling him I had decided to remove all my past sexts, hookups off my social media an life.

Polli

It was a personal moment for me to just let go of it all. And, I just didn’t want to be in contact with the past anymore. I remember briefly explaining it to him.

[narrator]

Polli sighs in a train of thought.

Polli

I was realizing that I wanted to prepare for my future partner, and be as faithful as necessary.

Polli

Despite this, I didn’t hold anything against him for it, I just wanted to let it stay in my history.

Polli

It wasn’t the easiest choice to make, having to let that remaining cord of us talking be cut.

Polli

But I just knew he was holding me back. I think he enjoyed the attention I gave him when I was less confident. He got away with more.

Polli

Xix was the type of guy to flirt with me or try to call me an be playful, but whenever I mentioned something honestly, he’d ignore an silence me.

Polli

He would completely shun me when I mentioned something honest. When I challenged his ways he went mute until the coast was clear to try it again.

Polli

He would praise me or be all playful by commenting on my posts my daily updates online, he would talk all cutesy and jokingly.

Polli

Again, we never dated an he wasn’t the type to open up about anything in his mysterious life.

Polli

Yet, he asked me endless things, seeing how hurt an desperate I used to be for attention.

Polli

Sometimes I’d say why flirt with me if you don’t plan on keeping me? An he would never answer.

Polli

He gave this vibe that he just wanted to play with my heart as a toy without ever going further.

Polli

And if something tested that, he reacted oddly.

Polli

If I mentioned anything that suggested he would have to actually keep his word if he wanted to keep flirting, he stopped answering.

Polli

You get the point..basically I got tired of being used as a fantasy toy. Like getting the prize without the work. That’s why I cut him off.

Polli

Now, I didn’t think any of this was a big deal.

Polli

Infact I had forgotten all about it until these nightmares of him began.