Episode 4 — A glimpse
Growing up in an orphanage, I have always wanted a family. 𝘈 𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺.
Ten years ago — That was the time, I met Maven and Clark. I was an eighteen-year-old boy back then.
I was a little old for getting adopted, already an adult. But I liked them.
Esmee
Hi! Nice to meet you brother! I'm Esmee.
She stretched her hand out and smiled like the world was made of sunshine.
Some people smile with their mouths, some with their eyes. Esmee smiled with everything she had. It was… too much.
I didn’t return the handshake. Not because I hated her. But because I didn’t know what to do with that kind of warmth. I wasn’t used to it.
She was just a kid. Eleven or twelve, I think. And I was some bitter orphan with a past too heavy for her cheerfulness.
Esmee's smile gradually faded away as I didn't hold her hand. Since then, I have become the reason for her gloominess.
I grew up with girls in the orphanage— they were my sisters.
But Esmee was the only sister I 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 wanted.
Since then, I kept my distance. She was everything I wasn’t. And maybe that’s why I couldn’t stand her.
Clark West
Augustin, dear?
A muscle on my jaw twitched. I smiled at Clark before I shook Esmee's hand.
"Don't call me 𝘉𝘳𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳, just call me by my name."
"Don't bother me Esmee, otherwise you have to complete the summer homework within a day."
"Wha— what the heck! Stop crying, Esmee. Come here!"
"Why the heck were you with that boy? You're fourteen, Esmee."
"Don't. You. Dare. Call. Me. Brother. 𝘜𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘥?"
Four years. These — torturing her and torturing myself by hurting her, continued for four years.
In other people's eyes, we were typical siblings, always bickering. Although bicker is not the appropriate term because Esmee didn't talk back. Ever.
She always flinched whenever I yelled at her.
I helped her to pass exams, tried to comfort her when Marshmallow passed away and searched for her like a dog when she got lost in the rain.
But I knew those 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘯𝘰𝘵 brotherly concerns. Not anymore.
And one day— sometime between her clumsy laughter turning soft, and her eyes learning to hold back tears— I realized she wasn’t the spoiled child anymore.
And that scared the hell out of me.
Because suddenly, I was noticing things I shouldn’t.
Noticing her.
I prayed Maven and Clark would disown me. Push me away. Anything to stop this before it twisted further.
But they loved me like a son. Still do.
And I—I couldn’t even trust my own heart anymore.
I tried to ignore it. To bury it.
Because the idea of wanting more, of crossing that line—felt wrong.
But feelings don’t always ask permission.
They creep in, slowly, where logic fails.
And that terrified me more than anything.
I would never hurt Maven and Clark.
Esmee
Have I done something wrong Augustin? You don't want to be my Brother, right?
Augustin
Then why are you still here? 𝘎𝘰 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺! Just get away from my sight!
That was the last time I lost my patience.
After that, she maintained distance from me, as I wanted. I left for the course later and started my company. It's been six years.
We see each other three or four times a year. The past me thought that it was mere affection and I'd forget about her.
Except that I didn't.
But I don't deserve Esmee.
I still remember how hurt she was. The thing is— we are not meant for each other.
Comments
Draco—`•`—Malfoy.
You frightened her.
2024-07-29
4
Draco—`•`—Malfoy.
You do, simpleton. You DO!
2024-07-29
3
Draco—`•`—Malfoy.
He needs to accept his feelings and face them. For she might be taken away by someone else, otherwise. আর তখন ছেলেটা বসে বসে আঙুল চষা ছাড়া আর কিছুই করতে পারবে না। I tell you.
2024-07-29
3