Chapter 20 - Someone To Talk To

Inside the car.

“Why don’t you tell me?”

Ross frowned, “Yes I was about to, I just..”

“What?”

He rubbed his forehead and sighed “I just had too many things in my mind recently”

“Do-do you need someone to talk to?” and I hope you could talk to me about your thoughts, and also your personal stuffs.

“I have many things in my mind, I’d like to keep it for myself” he tilted his head looking at me.

“Oh” I looked down.

He shrugged, “I’m okay”

I exhales a deep harsh breath saying, “You can talk to me or hug me if you have a bad day”

The traffic lights coincidentally turned red, Ross pulled the brake, “Can I do that?”

He turned into the cute innocent Ross. So I nod my head one more time to assure him. I’ve made my choice to let him pulls me closer into his life.

Ross leaned closer and wrapped me onto his arms, his gentle arms gives the space to breathe. I can smell my favorite coconut scent from his hair. This guy is so unpredictable and so I couldn’t control myself. I could feel the warmth of the blush on my face was developing into a burning flame. My heart beating fast, I can feel Ross sniffing my hair. I let my body sag, my muscles become loose. Despite of the heaviness in my stomach, it fluttered at the feeling of my body pressed against his. I sunk into the warmth of his side, appreciative of the simple gesture. Does my heart bound in the false wires of morality? Is it allowed to beat but only so much, no more or less than is decent? It beats to fast until it echoes in my ears and I am so afraid he could hear it.

TIN TIN TIN TIT TIT

The honks of other cars behind us breaking the moments.

“Ross?” I called him, holding his sleeve. Ross loosened his arms and begin switching gears. I don’t know how long I could hold this but I really don’t understand what do I want myself. What is happening to me?

At the mall, Ross just standing still, following wherever I go.

PING

Kendrick texted me again, well, he slept a lot. Maybe he has just woke up.

I stretches my pocket and took out my phone, 16:50 on my lockscreen.

Kendrick: Good Evening? Or Good Afternoon? Whatever! Hello, Ma Lady!!

This dude always text me with cheerful words, I love him this way. It makes me wanted to reply his text. Damn, I’m really in love with him.

Me: Whatever day it is. Just.. Hey !

And I always try to be fun too.

Kendrick: What are you doing right now? Watching? Youtube? Or reading novels?

I sniggered, I do tell him I watch Youtube or reading novels while actually I’m writing novels. “Enough texting, princess?” Ross glared, “I’ve been standing here for 5 minutes but you haven’t move an inch. You keep on smiling with your stupid phone”

“Oh” I lifted my head, “Yea” I added.

I grabbed a batik shirt and show it to Ross, “Do you think this suits dad?”

“For dad, yes”

I rubbed my chin, thinking. “Should we get another thing? Besides a gift?”

“What it is?”

“Cake?” I shrugged with an eyebrow lifted.

“Fine, I’ll bring you there”

“Okay! So I’ll pay this.. one ..first” I speak slowly.

Ross nods his head, “Go”

He stands outside the shop, waiting for me to pay. Ross seems very upset since we came back from hiking, even after the ironic hug I gave.

“You don’t want to buy anything, right?”

Ross scratched the back of his head, mumbling. “I was about to, but..” he seems hesitate.

“But?” I repeated.

“That’s why I need you to do it quickly. We are going to the jewellery store after this”

“Alrightt.. Alright..”

We went to a jewellery store inside the mall, Ross looking around the shop, asking for the most suitable gift for a man in his 50s. A woman with navy blue shirt and a nametag BELLA then brought a tray of golden chain bracelets and necklaces.

“I’ll take this one” he pointed to a gold chain bracelet.

Well, this dude is rich. Of course he could afford expensive stuffs.

“Where now?” asked Ross while waiting for the packaging done.

“Cake shop? I know a nice bakery inside this mall”

“Then, let’s go”

At the bakery. I choose a beautiful rainbow cake, since Mr.Park is a very bright man. I don’t know what he likes, so does Ross. According to his biological son, Mr.Park loves everything sweet so he doesn’t mind whatever the cake is, he’ll love it.

“Now what?” he asked again.

6 o’clock in the evening.

“Let’s go home”

I wonder what makes him so upset. Is it because I ignore him during hiking? Or is it because I ask about his crush and it turns him moody?

I wonder who is the girl Ross crushing with. She must be so lucky. Still, I encourage myself to ask him, “Ross?”

He hummed again. “May-may I a-a-asked y-you?” struggling to finish my word, I have to prepare my mental, must get ready for his next eyes -glaring. Ross tilted his head, “What do you want to ask?” he responds quickly but sounds firm.

“Do you really love that girl?”

At the same time, Ross pulled the brake and we stop by the red light of the traffic lights. Then, he turned his head towards me, “Yes, I do” his eyes gazing straight to mine, there is no arch on his lips, he is not joking and I feel like being pierced by his stares.

“Do you really want to know who she is?”

And that’s when I can’t stop my heart from beating too fast. Again...

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