Incorrect Haikyuu
⫷A/N⫸
Let's just say writers block sucks. (๑•᎑<๑)
Bokuto
Yeah I don't cry ThAt easily
Kuroo
That's not fucking true
Kuroo
At practice yesterday Akaashi returned your high five and you cried on the spot
Little Kid
[puts face in the cake]
Bokuto
So it's cute when they do it but not me
Kuroo
It's different when we are at a restaurant and it's not our cake
Akaashi
You are also like like literally 18
Bokuto
Four months four fucking months
Akaashi
Why the hell are you mad now
Terushima
C'mon bo, you have to admit it was funny
Bokuto
YOU GUYS WATCHED ME WATER A FAKE PLANT FOR FOUR FUCKING MONTHS
Bokuto
I STARTED TO GET ATTACHED TO IT
Kenma
Technically it's plan G
Yamamoto
How many plans are there. Does it go up to plan M
Kenma
Yes but in plan M Lev gets hurt
Yaku
I'm really starting to like plan M
Iwaizumi
If you had 10 cookies and I asked for 5 how many would you have
Iwaizumi
It's basic math, how do you not know this
Oikawa
Because I would give them all to you cause I love you
Iwaizumi
[holding back tears] disgusting absolutely disgusting get out of my room.
Nishinoya
I have been waiting to go to a liquid zoo
Nishinoya
It's a zoo for animals under water
Ennoshita
What you mean an aquarium
Nishinoya
Oh yeah that's what it was called
Akaashi
Did you hurt all those people Bokuto-san
Akaashi
Kenma told me you did, also I saw video footage
Bokuto
So you believe Kenma and your own eyes over me
Akaashi
Your right, I'm sorry I ever doubted you
Police Officer
We got called that you have pot in your car
Kuroo
[pulls out a potted plant] Oh you mean this
Police Officer
Oh sorry my mistake whatcha growing
Kageyama
Your existence is annoying
Kageyama
Your presence is annoying but the thought of anything bad happening to you upsets me
Bokuto
How's the cutest boy in the world doing
Atsumu
[across the room] Hinata is doing great
Oikawa
When I fell from heaven
Ushijima
No when you didn't go to nationals
[Suga teaching Tsukishima to drive]
Sugawara
Ok Kageyama and Yamaguchi are standing in the road. What do you hit
Tsukishima
Oh Kageyama for sure I could never hurt Tadashi
Sugawara
[massaging his temples] THE BRAKES TSUKISHIMA THE FUCKING BRAKES
Kuroo
I think I'm falling for you
Hinata
What's your biggest fear
Hinata
Mines the kool-aid man I feel kinda stupid right now
Ennoshita
I just want to hear three little words
Ennoshita
Aww that's sweet but try again
Bokuto
I found a fool proof method to find out if someone is evil
Bokuto
If they hate Hinata
Atsumu
Ok that is some pretty solid logic
Bokuto
What happens to a car if you press the brake and the accelerator at the same time
Kuroo
It takes a screenshot
Akaashi
Get out both of you
Hinata
What are cute things you call your boyfriend
Bokuto
Preheat oven to 350 degrees
Sugawara
Hinata truth or dare
Sugawara
How many hours have you slept this week
Sugawara
I dare you to go to sleep
Hinata
I DON'T LIKE THIS GAME
Sugawara
[Hinata comes in late to practice wet] Why are you soaking wet
Hinata
Tsukishima tried to water me to see if I would grow taller
Tsukishima
[comes in with a bucket of water] BITCH WHY DID YOU RUN AWAY IT WON'T WORK
Akaashi
Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit
Bokuto
Wisdom is knowing not to put them in a fruit salad
Kuroo
Philosophy is wondering if that makes ketchup a smoothie
Tsukishima
Common sense is knowing that ketchup isn't a fucking smoothie
Hanamaki
Oikawa and Iwaizumi sitting in a tree
Oikawa
Choose-your-next-words-care-ful-ly
Matsukawa
First comes love then comes marriage
Iwaizumi
Then comes a middle blocker with spinal damage
Kageyama
Sorry I'm late I was doing... stuff
Hinata
[comes in behind him clearly disheveled] HE PUSHED ME DOWN THE FUCKING STAIRS AGAIN
Tsukishima
[snorts] Yeah, 5 heads taller then you
Kuroo
What pleases you in bed
Kenma
No I wouldn't die for you
Kenma
I'd live for you. My whole fucking life I'd been willing to die. But I'll live for you
Hinata
Kenma t-thank you but stop being depressed
Bokuto
The situation gone from worse to worser
Akaashi
That's not a word but continue
Kuroo
[trying to reason to him]
Akaashi
[with no emotion] I got him a mood ring and it said he was angry so he is "staying" true to his emotions
Daichi
F*ck me in the motherfucking a** with satan's limp d*ck
Sugawara
If you don't shut the f*ck up I will actually cut off your balls
Asahi
I'm going to f*ck this presentation
Sugawara
Guys please let me show you my slideshow
Ennoshita
IF YOU SAY KETCHUP IS A SMOOTHIE ONE MORE TIME I WILL MURDER YOU
Sugawara
I'm done with this team
Teacher
The assignment was to bring something important to you to class
Teacher
Akaashi is not an object and he has class
Hinata
[on top of a building] I'm going to jump
Hanamaki
THE FLOOR IS OIKAWA
Iwaizumi
[aggressively stomps]
Oikawa
YOU ALL ARE SO MEAN
Bokuto
I have a better idea
Akaashi
No you don't Bokuto-san history has proven that
Tsukishima
[at a party] Oi where is the alcohol
Kageyama
[tosses the fruit punch bowl in the air]
Hinata
[jumps up and hits it to the ground]
Kageyama
It has been spiked
Kuroo
What do you mean by that
Yaku
SHUT THE F*CK UP WE ARE TRYING TO SLEEP
Oikawa
Give me freedom or death
Kyoutani
[pulls out a gun] I'll give you death I'm fine with that
Oikawa
I have always had an unspoken rivalry
Kageyama
It's not a rivalry your just always mean to me. Also it's not unspoken you talk
about it all the time
Kuroo
I screwed up big time
Kenma
Given your daily life experiences you have to be more specific
Tendou
What if I put coffee in my cereal instead of milk
Ushijima
[taking away the coffee pot] What if you didn't
Takeda
What are the symptoms of teenage depression
Coach Ukai
I don't know why are you asking me
Takeda
Earlier I saw Yachi drop a sock into the laundry and say "Why has god forsaken me"
Kuroo
Kenma we need to talk about your inability to open up
Kenma
[leaning his head out of the window] Wow it would really be a shame if someone SHOT ME IN THE HEAD RIGHT NOW
Kuroo
KENMA QUIT IT WE TALKED ABOUT THIS TOO
Instagram
Your password is incorrect
Teacher
Write your essay on this page
Kageyama
[write your essay and turns it in]
Tsukishima
[silent rage noises]
Hinata
The word suns upside down is still suns
Yamaguchi
Why is Hinata asleep on your shoulder
Kageyama
Shut up it's cute
Yamaguchi
Just an hour ago you complained about him being annoying
Kageyama
I changed my mind
⫷A/N⫸
Also all of these where found on Instagram just search incorrect Haikyuu. I wanted a funny chapter so I made this and it was very fun to write to me at least (๑•ᴗ•๑)
Comments
Sssbb Fffmm
/Facepalm//Smirk/
2024-12-20
0
Oliver Forshee
Wow haha that has me laughing on the ground
2022-09-24
1
Tobby Gwen
lol
2022-09-04
0