1

As we entered the gates to HorrorLand, we had no idea that, in less than an hour, we would all be lying in our coffins.

I'm the calm one in the Morris family. Everyone says, "Lizzy, you're the calm one." And I'm trying to tell this story calmly.

But, believe me — there's no way!

We had never planned to go to HorrorLand. In fact, we'd never heard of it.

The five of us were squeezed into Dad's little Toyota, on our way to spend the day at Zoo Gardens Theme Park. Dad had messed up and left the map at home. But Mom said the park would be real easy to find.

When we got close to the park, Mom said, there would be lots of signs to direct us. But so far we hadn't seen a single sign.

Dad was driving, and Mom was beside him in the front. I was squeezed in back with my little brother Luke, who is ten, and Luke's friend Clay.

It wasn't the best place to be. My brother cannot sit still for a second. Especially in the car. He just has too much energy. And he's totally goofy.

The longer we drove, the more restless Luke became. He tried wrestling with Clay, but there really wasn't room. Then he tried arm wrestling with him, and the two of them kept bumping me until I lost my temper and started shouting at them to stop.

"Why don't you three play Alphabets?" Mom suggested from the front. "Look out the window for letters."

"There aren't any," Luke replied. "There aren't any signs."

"There isn't anything to look at," Clay grumbled.

He was right. We were driving past flat, sandy fields. There were a few scraggly trees here and there. The rest was all desert.

"I'm going to take this turnoff," Dad announced. He took off his Chicago Cubs cap and scratched his thinning blond hair. "Haven't I already taken this turnoff?"

Dad is the only blond in the family. Mom, Luke, and I all have straight black hair and blue eyes.

In fact, Dad doesn't look as if he belongs in the same family. The three of us are tall and thin, with very fair skin. And Dad is short and kind of chubby, with a round face that's almost always pink. I tease him all the time because I think he looks a lot more like a wrestler than a bank manager, which he is.

"I'm pretty sure we've already been here," Dad said unhappily.

"It's hard to tell. It's all desert," Mom replied, gazing out her window.

"Very helpful," Dad muttered.

"How can I be helpful?" Mom shot back. "You're the one who left the map on the kitchen table."

"I thought you packed it," Dad grumbled.

"Why should it be my job to pack the map?" Mom cried.

"Break it up, you two," I interrupted. Once they start fighting, they never stop. It's always best to interrupt them quickly before they really get into it.

"I'm the Mad Pincher!" Luke cried. He let out a gruesome, horror-movie laugh and started pinching Clay's ribs and arms.

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