part 4

Shit

I totally forgot that he stays for dinner. I thought he was already leave right away.

He look me straight in the eyes and my sense telling me that, that looking was a regret one.

Then he came closer to me. His gaze send shiver down to my spine. I was so into his gaze and not realize that he's now right beside me.

We were really close. Our lips were inches apart. He cupped my face with his bare hands.

I think my face was red as tomato. He was about to kiss me and I close my eyes.

And I feel butterflies in my stomach. He was kissing me!!!

I was melted in his kiss. Damn he is a good kisser. As he grab my waist I lingered my hands around his neck.

He lick my lower lips asking for an opening. I let him tasted me, as he explore my mouth.

I was confused. He hate me. Why? What did he do to me. Leaving me alone by myself.

'He just using you, as he did not love you.' My heart tell me, and I was thinking the same. Probably the evil one.

'No he's not, he have disappointed you once. But every people deserve a second chance.' And this is probably the good one.

I hate him, but at the same time I missed him a lot. I want him stay by my side.

I want to wake up next to him, make breakfast with him, watch movie night together.

He broke the kiss, and actually I was not ready to break it. I want him back, but his gaze make me open my eyes.

"Hi." He smile at me. Arghh, and don't forget the dimple.

"Why..." I muttered.

"I'm sorry, I.. I was so stupid. I need you, and I mean it. I know I left you once, but not this time. Not anymore."

I was melted at his words. As I know I was crying in silence. He hug me with his arm.

He was warm, and I felt protected. I want to be like this everyday.

"I.. I can't. I don't know but I just can't." I want to hug him back. But I don't know why, I just can't.

"Why, Stel? Why. Don't you miss me? I'm back for you, I'm here to protect you. I can't live without you. Please Stella." He said in one breath.

I sighed slightly. I know that, but I don't want to break my heart again.

It was painful. It's empty. It was... Alone...

I want to love him, but not now. Not until he make it out. I want him to show me his love.

"I would like to sleep. Can you please?" I look at him and he was broken.

"Su..sure... I see you tomorrow then." He said turning his back, and back off.

Before he left he smiled at me, and I just give him a faint smile. Don't want to be rude.

I sighed, and look at the ceiling. It was empty. Plain. Alone.

I want him. I want his love. Want to have kids together. But I have to know if he loves me or not.

I was drifted to sleep while my thoughts was full of him.

End of part 4___

__xxanaannhxx__

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