How shall I say this.
To the person who wanted to know my feelings.
I wasn't supposed to kill my self. I don't really want to.
The truth is, I don't want to die. I just want this feelings to fleet.
Sometimes I think about ending my self because of the pain in my chest when the person I cared hurt me.
I wasn't perfect, but they expected so high on me.
They always wanted me to be perfect.
My parents said "it's okay if you're not the first ranking".
But... I saw in their eyes the disappointment on me.
Mom keep saying "you're useless". No one cares. But me.
My dear best friend said "you're the bad luck in your family".
Dad said "you're a bad child".
Brother said "you can't even be like your cousin".
I KNOW!!! IM NKT LUKE THEM! HIT ME! IT DOESN'T HURT ANYMORE, BECAUSE IM BEING NYMB BY THOSE PAINFUL WORDS!!!
I started hating them. Because I can't believe that the most dear people around me saying those words.
At the classroom. My teacher expecting so high on me too.
Those classmates who backstabbing me. I hate them.
No one knows how much it hurts when they looked at me with those sharpened eyes. It was like they want me dead.
I just want to be loved.
I just want to get comfort.
But who else? No one stayed.
