Billy was the ultimate little brother—a seven-year-old whirlwind of curiosity and sticky fingers, obsessed with one thing: his sister, Ellie. Wherever Ellie went, Billy followed. Whether she was hanging out with her friends, reading in her room, or trying to hide in the pantry with a bag of chips, Billy was there. And for Ellie, who was a dignified fifteen-year-old, this was nothing short of a nightmare.
One Saturday morning, Ellie decided she’d had enough.
“I’m going to Sasha’s house, Billy. You can’t come,” she declared as she laced up her sneakers.
Billy, sitting on the couch with a juice box, didn’t even look up. “Why not?”
“Because it’s a girl thing.” Ellie emphasized the words like they were a magical spell.
Billy gasped. “You’re doing magic?!”
Ellie facepalmed. “No, Billy. It’s just stuff you wouldn’t understand. Grown-up things.”
Billy squinted at her suspiciously. “Like taxes?”
Ellie rolled her eyes. “Sure. Like taxes.”
That should’ve been the end of it, but Ellie underestimated her brother's determination. Half an hour later, as Ellie biked toward Sasha’s house, she noticed a suspiciously small figure pedaling furiously about twenty yards behind her. He was wearing a helmet shaped like a shark and sunglasses that were way too big for his face.
Ellie screeched to a stop. “Billy! Are you serious?!”
Billy skidded to a halt beside her, looking unbothered. “What? It’s a free country.”
“No, it’s my Saturday!” Ellie fumed.
Billy grinned. “Guess what? Now it’s a Billy-Ellie Saturday. Two-for-one deal!”
Ellie groaned but kept going, hoping Sasha’s mom would scare him off. Unfortunately, when they arrived, Sasha’s mom greeted Billy like he was a visiting diplomat.
“Ellie, you didn’t tell me your adorable little brother was coming!” she cooed.
Ellie shot Billy a death glare, but he just beamed.
Inside, things quickly spiraled out of control. Sasha’s mom had a bowl of candy on the kitchen counter, which Billy discovered within seconds. Fueled by pure sugar and unrelenting energy, he became a tornado of chaos. He interrupted their gossip session by loudly guessing which boy in their class Ellie secretly liked (“It’s definitely Brad—she doodles his name on her notebooks!”).
When they tried to watch a movie, Billy kept rewinding the kissing scenes to make fake gagging noises.
And then, in the middle of an intense game of charades, Billy had his masterpiece moment.
Ellie was acting out "elephant," complete with a makeshift trunk made of her arm. Billy suddenly shouted, “I know what she’s doing! She’s pretending to be Mom’s face when she sees Dad’s cooking!”
Sasha snorted so hard she choked on her soda. Ellie froze mid-trunk, her face turning bright red.
“Billy!” Ellie shrieked, lunging at him, but he darted away, cackling like a cartoon villain.
By the end of the day, Ellie was exhausted, humiliated, and sugar-deprived. As Billy sat on the couch that evening, munching popcorn and watching cartoons, Ellie plopped down beside him.
“You’re a menace, you know that?” she muttered.
Billy looked at her, his face suddenly serious. “I follow you everywhere because you’re my favorite person.”
Ellie blinked. “Really?”
Billy grinned. “Yeah. Also, you always have snacks.”
Ellie threw a pillow at him.
“Hey! You can’t hit me; I’m adorable!” Billy protested, holding up the popcorn bowl like a shield.
Despite herself, Ellie laughed. For all his antics, Billy wasn’t so bad. But next Saturday, she was definitely locking her door.
