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Hello! This is Ema. I am just a simple girl with lots of dream. I have always been a happy girl in my entire life because I got everything a girl want in her life. Good parents, nice childhood, career,etc. But today I am not happy. I am not at all happy. Why? Because the scene in front of me is very hurtful to me. Why? Because today the love of my life is displeased with me for some reason. And I unknowingly hurted his feelings. He... He never talked back at me. Never in our previous conversation. But today... Today I just crossed my lines and that's it...
We argued.
We... We argued for the first time.
I... I shouted at him. I realised I did a big mistake, no...not a mistake but a sin. I shouldn't had shouted at him. He... without replying me, without giving me a chance to explain, he thought to ignore me. He was leaving, leaving from the room, leaving me behind in this empty room. He was leaving from the room, But... It felt like he was leaving from my world. He was getting separated from my soul. I felt like if i couldn't stop him now, I might never be able to do it in future too. I panicked, panicked in for that mere thought of him leaving me. My world stopped when I was looking at him taking every single step away from me. I was in horror, I was scared . Scared of loosing him. I couldn't accept the fact that the love of my life not being in my world. He was not just a part of my world, But part of me, my heart, my soul, my everything.
He was about to hold the handle of the door. Watching him taking every single step helplessly, made me feel like a coward. My inner voice told me, "now or never". Upon hearing that voice, I just straight away went to him and back hugged him. For a minute he was silent. He was not struggling. As if he wanted me to Stop him! Stop him with any means. Then I turned him and grabbed his wrist, making him look at me. We had an eye contact and his eyes were showing millions of emotions. It was not just love but feeling of being hated, getting abandon, being hurt, and it broke my heart into millions of pieces. Because My love, he had tears in his eyes. He looked so hurt and so heartbroken. My cute little baby. My innocent and soft hearted baby. How? How the hell did I forget. For him, only I matter. He always considered my feelings, my likes and dislikes, my comfort and discomfort, my everything. He understands me the most and perfect beyond anyone. And I... I just hurted him with my mere words. His eyes were telling me to Stop him, to held him, to embrace him, to hide him or else he can leave any second. Those tears were a threat to me. They were threatening me to stop. And as I said it was showing mixed emotions I can feel he was also begging me to stop him, to love him. He was trembling, his hands were shaking, he don't want any explanation from me. He only want my love, his eyes told me. His eyes were glittering due to a slight tears forming in his eyes. I cannot accept tears in my love eyes, I just cannot. When he cannot accept any tears in my eyes then how dare I accept it. No it never gonna happen. And especially not when I was the reason. Without thinking twice, to distract him from crying, to make him stop, to make him feel loved, to make him feel that he is the most important person in my life... I cupped his face softly and smashed my lips on his, and a drop of tears fell from his right eyes as he closed his eyes. I just wiped his tears and felt my lips into his. For a minute we were just feeling eachother warmness silently. Soon he grabbed my back of the neck from his right hand and waist from his left hand making me closer to him without leaving any gap between us, not even a single air could pass from us. When he made me close to him I crashed or might say landed on his hard rock chest. And then, he started sucking my upper lips. With that I responded him by sucking his lower lips. We both were in sync. We were now sucking each other for a minute now. Because I was small in height and size compared to him, at a time I was unable to cope up with him. To maintain the sync I hugged him from neck and with that I was patting him from the back of his head, to make him feel loved. To make him understand that I am only his, I am not going anywhere, that there is no need to feel insecure. He smiled... He smiled in between the kiss. I felt that, I was success in making him assured. Soon the session began to heat up. The kiss which was a slow, soft, sweet and loving turned into lust. Wo began to kiss each other aggressively. I was so into the kiss that I couldn't remember him thrusting his tongue in my mouth. But by the time I get to know we were already kissing each other with tongue or more like having tongue fight. I chuckled internally on that thought. We were sucking each other mercilessly. We both were messed up. His hair was messed up. But despite that he was looking hot and sexy. My man, yes mine. He is my man. And about me, well let's not talk about hair it was gone case. Oh my god my lipstick it was all over the corner of the lips now. Some were on his lips too. I had some tears in my eyes as he bit my lip to give me punishment. The punishment to shout at him. Well to be honest if I get this type of punishment then I would love to do mistake again and again but I would never want to hurt him. I got my lesson I would never repeat this mistake of mine again. Never ever not in this life of mine. I don't like tears in my mans eyes atleast not for this reason. It's an exception if it's about sexual thing. For a second we stopped, we stopped kissing after 5 minutes. We were both breathing heavily and looking eachothers being all messed. But we didn't stop there. He smirked and suddenly attacked me on my neck, he was kissing and sucking it mercilessly giving me a redish and purpulish colour on my bare, soft and silky skin. I too didn't stopped him, today I gave him the privilege to do anything, to please himself and to calm himself down so to do that I tilt my head to the opposite of where he was sucking giving him access to my bare and long neck. He was doing that for too long now and I felt my leg got numbed from all the standing and it gave up. I jumped on him on his waist and wrapped my legs on it. He then carried me like a Koala. But he didn't stop his work and continued to make his art near my collarbone . He began to carry me and was still kissing me to our bed. And then.......
And then he put me on the bed while kissing me. He looked into my eyes and he eyes became soft suddenly . I was confused at first then he kissed my forehead with a small smile. He was still emotional , he was still insecured. How pathetic I am. I claim to love him and yet cannot remove the insecurity from his mind. I know his heart trust me but because of the past events that occurred in his life made him like this. He sat beside me on the bed and held my both hand and looking at me with his longing eyes and with a warm smile I got up from and signed him to come beside me. He did what I told. When he came to me on the bed the first thing I did was to hug him. I hugged him as close as I can. I know the kiss before he did was to claim me as his. To make his brain beleive that I am his. He just wanted to make sure I was not leaving him and that I am his. I just played along with him. Because I didn't wanted to disappoint him. He became just like a small baby craving for love from his loved on. I just kissed him on the forehead and cuddle all night. And the next day we talked things out and we were like before.
This fight, the argument we had made me realise that not all time avoiding the matter or arguing over the same matter will solve all the problems. Sometimes only a HUG can solve the things that cannot be described from words. But that doesn't mean that all time a hug can solve sometime we need to put on words to express our feelings. Well it depends on our own situation. But a relationship can only stay stable if there is a proper communication, respect and trust. Because only love cannot maintain a relationship. There are many other aspects that need to be look upon.
END.
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