Life does not go like how we want it to. I had planned everything and also worked so hard towards my dreams and aspirations. Just when I thought nothing else could go wrong I lost my mom. Not long after my dad failed in his business and he had to sell our house, the cars and several of our properties to cover the losses. I was down and I finding ways and means to clear my name, because my Academic achievement meant everything to me now but I could do nothing about it.
I called out to God to help me as always, the God who gave me everything now seemed to have all his blessings. I was hopeless and beyond help...not one of my so-called friends and trusted relatives lended a helping hand in my dire situation. I was utterly troubled and went into depression as I applied for several part-time time jobs all to no avail. No one was willing to hire an unethical Academic scholar. Even the church members were not happy about my behavior of plagiarized thesis.
Bit the funny thing was no one asked me anything, whether I had really done that didn't seem to matter to them. I tried to explain the first few times people accused me but it was of no use no one listened to waht they didn't like to hear. Just because my family was well-off and I could afford to go to a prestigious University they had assumed that I had bribed my way into getting everything; including my Doctoral Degree. No one, not even once apart from my dad and granny believed in me.
As I was in this disturbed state, my dad suggested thatvI go and stay with my maternal grandma for a few days to relax myself and stay away from all negative judgemental eyes. I was reluctant at first because my name was not cleared and dad was clearly struggling trying to recover his business. But he insisted and I packed my bags a few days later and left for granny's house.
My granny's house is in a bit isolated from the town. She lives in a small rural village covered by mountains. I had gone there during my summer vacations several times so I remember the way despite being bad at directions. Or I thought so. As I walked passed several hills I thought the environment around became more and more unfamiliar. A passerby happened to ask me where I was headed to, only then did he tell me I was heading the wrong direction. He directed me to the right direction and I changed my route.
Having the convenience of driving everywhere instead of walking had slowed my metabolism and I found hard to breathe as I climbed the mountains. As much as I loved hiking and the mountain regions I was out of practice having lived in the city for so long away from the native rural village life. I had to stop several times to catch my breath and take short rests to continue walking, but the breath-taking view kept my mood good and fresh. For a moment I forgot all my worries and I lived inthe present as I took a breath and inhaled cold air.
As I reached the village after five hours of walk which should have initiatially taken three hours; I was famished and my whole body felt sore. As I reached the village I found my granny waiting for my arrival, pacing right and left anxiously. She might have been waiting for a long time judging but her anxious behavior. I called out to her and she happily came running to me and hugged me tightly. She smelled like my mother and it brought tears to my eyes. That smell felt like home. I was finally home again. I felt at ease once I got into her embrace.
She led me to her house, no my home because that's what I felt as I stepped in. I had the feeling that I was finally home at last. The house smelled fresh of several produce from the orchard and garden. I could distinctly smell apples, mangoes, lemons and oranges. I could also smell pickles, she often made radish, carrot or mixed vegetable pickles. My life had been so busy with several things I forgot to enjoy the simple things. I was so stuck in achieving great things I had somewhere along the way forgotten to simply enjoy life.
For the next few days I went around with my granny around the village meeting all her friends and I began to interact and talk about several things. I had been away from social contact for so long after the demise of my mother's demise. I had to learn how to accept people into my life again. At first I felt uncomfortable sharing about myself or being so close with others, it came as an invade upon my privacy and my comfort zone. I had to be pulled out of my cocoon several times and learn to form new relations simple ones with people.
My granny was always there to help, she knew of my difficulties and didn't force me to do anything I didn't feel comfortable with. I could take it slow one step at a time at my own pace as she would always be my stronghold she assured me. I wanted to go out into the wild woods and be on my own for awhile but my sense of direction was so bad. My granny offered to accompany me, I refused saying I don't want her to be tired but she insisted because she was worried I would get lost.
The next day, we got up early and packed lunch for a full day outing in the forest. We went into the thick forest, the warm sunshine and the fresh smell of the woods greeted us. It had rained hard last night and the earthy smell of after-rain smelled good and pure, uncontaminated by human. I felt reluctant to intrude upon the beautiful undisturbed nature...as I was mesmerized by the smell and sight of every little thing a cute mushroom, a beautiful tree, a magical spring sprouting with sparkling clear water, my granny called me and I went with her into a place which seems covered from the outside world.
We had to lift a huge bunch of hanging wisteria and other beautiful plants to see the place my grandma wanted to show me. The fairies seemed live there, it absolutely felt magical and wrong to be there. It was ethereal, so unlike reality and her situation. This environment made her forget everything, and they went foraging for wild fruits. One moment they're collecting berries, the next moment they're in search of berries and nuts. In the end they got several fleshy and juicy fruits, berries, cherries as well as lots of nuts.
They went back home and selected the fully ripped ones and distributed among the neighborhood and kept the not so ripe ones for preservation. As everything of these processes were done by hand and she had no time to think of anything she felt much more at peace. Her mind cleared and she seemed to have become healthier than before.
The next day they went for gathering mushrooms from the other part of the forest, the part that was farther than the place they had been yesterday. They had not packed anything for lunch because they would be back quickly before they get hungry. Little did they know that they would get a ton more than what they had expected to get and they were delayed by several hours. They had to search for edible wild fruits on their way home as they became famished by now.
She spent lots of time in the forest or in the mountains but mostly in the garden cleaning, weeding and planting vegetables and fruits like strawberries, blackberries, raspberries etc. Granny taught her everything and she began to be able to make a meal from scratch with produce from the garden itself. She began to learn to love life in a new way, one that was within her but had slowly faded away with time.
Just like that a month passed and she began to feel a lot better then the time she came. The excitement and vigor of life within her returned. Now she began to think she should return and put things into the right place. She knew she had to go back sooner or later. But she had the fear of the 'unknown', the safe feeling felt so familiar and at home and she didn't want to lose it anymore. So she distractedly went about the days for about a week.
Her garnny noticed she had been out of sorts and knew what she might be thinking. She knew what had to be done so...one late night she called her dear granddaughter and gave her advice on how she shouldn't be afraid. She encouraged her to face her fears because if she doesn't, she would have to regret her whole life. She also prayed for her as she did everyday, and kept on reminding her the importance of not losing faith.
Thus whole time she had too many things going on and she couldn't think of anything else. She had initiatially asked for God's help, she cried out to him to help her clear her name of the 'Plagiarized Thesis' nothing happened even when she cried out day and night. Then as her mother was hospitalized she fervently began to cry her heart out to God for help...to the point where she even negotiated 'Forget about my Doctoral Thesis & the false accusations, please heal my mom, make her better, I can even trade my own lifespan for her to live' Lord please! She pleaded but to no avail. Then her dad's business collapsed and she tried to help and also asked for God's help as always...without losing faith but nothing seemed to help. They who were once God's favorite seemed to have fallen out of favor, she slowly loses everything which also led to her doubting whether the God that created her loved her or not. She even began to doubt the existence of God. She hit rock bottom and couldn't get up.
She no longer bothered to pray or asked God's help or Say a daily gratitude prayer like in her younger years. It was only with the compulsion of her granny that she went back to church. She had spent her whole being a devout believer but she didn't not get what she wanted. Not only that she even seemed to have lost everything she initiatially had. God is unfair she thought, all her other friends indulged in partying and pleasure- seeking activities while she worked herself off day and night even when she had more than enough to live a luxurious life. She now had a grudge against God...her creator.
It was only when her granny reminded her of the simple joys of life, nature's gifts, that she realized being alive everyday is itself a blessing from heaven. All those hard experiences she had gone through was a training for her, God's toughest soldier. Just as the value of gold is tested through the highest degree of fire so is a believer's faith tested through suffering and pain. The gold can never be burned or destroyed even when it undergoes the highest degree of fire rather, it gets rid of all impurities and emerge as pure gold. In the same way a person after going through so much hard experiences and pain, becomes a better version of oneself if one endures. It was this realization that made her go back to the city.
She gets back to the city full of hope and new- found vigor, hoping for the best while also preparing herself for the worse. After all what was the worse that could happen, she no longer had anything more to lose. Worse comes to worse, she could go back to her garnny who's ever ready to take her back.
She then sues all those who had accused her of bribing the evaluators of her Doctoral Thesis. She bravely confronted the Supervisor who had evaluated her defense of the Thesis. Not everything went as she wanted to, and she faced even worse treatment than before. But she persistently kept on appealing to the court for justice, she sought for legal help as well as help from above. Hoping and praying to God not to forsake her for she only had him now.
God hears her prayer and after three months of persistent praying and appealing to the court for justice non-stop. Her Thesis was declared valid and qualified, the people who had accused her of bribing the evaluators were punished legally with three years imprisonment because the crime was against an Academic scholar who had suffered the brutal treatment of media, people and everyone whom she had come across. It turned out that the persons who accused her were none other than her so-called friends whom she thought she could trust even with her own life.
Life began to get better slowly and surely, her family business began thriving her father remarried and had a loving new family. She went onto get several job offers from prestigious Universities and she went to one which she particularly loved and began her life as a Professor. Now and then she went to visit her garnny who had brought back the 'love for life' into her again. A lot of times she still misses her mom but coping became easier as began to write and publish her own novels and poetry. With blessings from Heaven she now believes life will only get better and even if not what's the worse that could happen because she's God's favorite.
