Kaito was known as the savage boy in his school. He always had a witty comeback for anyone who tried to mess with him. He didn’t care about the rules, the teachers, or the consequences. He just wanted to have fun and make everyone laugh.
One day, he was sitting on the last bench of his class, doodling in his notebook. The teacher, Mr. Sato, was giving a boring lecture on history. Kaito decided to spice things up a bit. He raised his hand and asked, “Sir, can I ask you a question?”
Mr. Sato sighed and said, “Yes, Kaito, what is it?”
Kaito said, “Sir, do you know why history is called history?”
Mr. Sato said, “No, Kaito, why?”
Kaito said, “Because it’s his story, not her story. Women have no place in history.”
The class erupted in laughter. Mr. Sato was furious. He said, “Kaito, that is a sexist and ignorant remark. How dare you insult the contributions of women in history? Do you have any idea how many women have shaped the world we live in?”
Kaito said, “Yes, sir, I do. They have shaped it by making sandwiches for men.”
The class laughed even harder. Mr. Sato was speechless. He said, “Kaito, you are suspended for a week. Get out of my class right now.”
Kaito got up and said, “Sure, sir. But before I go, can I ask you one more question?”
Mr. Sato said, “What now?”
Kaito said, “Sir, do you know why you are so angry?”
Mr. Sato said, “No, Kaito, why?”
Kaito said, “Because you are history.” And he walked out of the class.
The next day, Kaito was riding his bike on the road. He saw a group of girls from his school walking on the sidewalk. He decided to have some fun with them. He sped up his bike and rode close to them. He shouted, “Hey ladies, do you want to ride with me?”
The girls ignored him and kept walking. Kaito said, “Come on, don’t be shy. I have a spare seat for you.”
One of the girls turned around and said, “No thanks, Kaito. We don’t want to ride with you.”
Kaito said, “Why not? Is it because I’m too fast for you?”
The girl said, “No, Kaito. It’s because you’re too slow for us.”
Kaito said, “Slow? How can you say that? I’m the fastest bike rider in town.”
The girl said, “Maybe on your bike, but not in bed.”
The girls laughed and walked away. Kaito was stunned. He had never been insulted like that before. He felt a surge of anger and humiliation. He decided to chase them and teach them a lesson.
He revved up his bike and followed them. He didn’t notice the red light at the intersection ahead. He didn’t see the truck coming from the opposite direction.
He crashed into the truck and flew off his bike.
He landed on the pavement with a thud.
He was bleeding profusely.
He was dying.
He looked up at the sky and saw a bright light.
He heard a voice saying,
“Welcome to heaven, Kaito.”
He said,
“Who are you?”
The voice said,
“I am God.”
Kaito said,
“God? Really? Can I ask you a question?”
God said,
“Sure, Kaito. What is it?”
Kaito said,
“God, do you know why you are called God?”
God said,
“No, Kaito. Why?”
Kaito said,
“Because you are Good Only at Dying.” And he died.
*The end*
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