"Naomi let's break up." I opened my eyes from the same dream as yesterday. It's been five days since we broke up with each other, but it feels like it was only yesterday. Ever since, you moved out this place feels empty. Every corner is filled with your memories and my dreams are of you now. Today might be the last day we will meet eachother again. And thinking about it makes me feel more hurt.
The bus today is moving faster then usual, I hope I never reach to you. I don't know how to face you anymore, and what should I say either. But, these days nothing is going the way I want. I stepped down from the bus and you were waiting for me in the bus stop, how nostalgic this feels, it's just like the time we first started going out. That smile of yours is the same but is it my hallucination that their is some sadness in your eyes? "Here." I passed him the things he left in our apartment, no, now it's only mine. "Thank you for keeping my things till I find an apartment to stay." "No, it's fine." I gave a forceful smile at him. Their was a unhandy silence between us now. "Then, I shall be going." I said. "Oh wait! I will drop you to your home." He suggested. "I am not going home now." "Then, I will drop you too wherever you want to go." He replied. This might be my last ride with him, that's what I thought and agreed. As we passed through the places we visited when we were together, the memories of it started to play like a tape, old yet it felt good. His back, hair as the wind passes by it, this all will be the last time. "We are here." He stopped his scooter. "Thank you for the ride. I can go from here." "Would be fine?" I looked back at him. "You don't have to worry about." I replied. That's it and I turned away from him. Their were many things I wanted to say but I couldn't say it. I didn't answer his question in yes or no because I knew it will take me sometime to be fine. The only thing I can do now is to move on from you and start living my life without you.
I played games to remove my frustration but it only worked for sometime. I tried the comfort food but it also doesn't works anymore. "What do I want?" Is what I am asking myself. Maybe I should walk my the river banks. That's what my mind said. But this place is also filled with you. The memories of you are flushing through my mind again. The things I wanted to say, what are they? "I wanted to you to stay beside me one last time." I sighed and walked home.
The home is always welcoming, I felt a bit relieved. I washed up and change into my home clothes and turned on my TV and searched for something funny too watch. I found it and laughed watching it but then again I feel down and couldn't stop my tears. I played music which outbursted the tears I have been holding since then. I don't want to feel this way anymore. It's too tiring. What was the reason for us to break up anyways. Oh now I remember you said it was not me it was you. I guess we moved to fast. I don't to love anyone anymore.While crying in my bed I didn't realised when I fall asleep last night. But it's okay it is a new day now.
I decided to go to a trip by myself for two days near the beach. I reached the hotel I would be staying and checked in. The beach view is pretty. I slept till the sun was about to set. I went to the balcony and stared at the sea. And for the first time in a while I smiled from the bottom of my heart. I decided to walk by the beach tomorrow and went outside to explore the place. My trip is short but I want to live the fullest without worrying for the time being.
The next morning I walked by the beach as I had decided. I stared at the sea it felt never-ending. The waves which brushes off by my feet felt ticklish. The wind which passes through my skin gave me a claming sensation. I the did cry but I felt like the waves are wiping away my tears. For the first time since we are apart I felt this good. I know it's not been too long but I want to move on from you sooner. I want to go back to the time when you were not their. I hope you are happy as well. I hope that even if I see you again I could still be strong enough to face you.
It's almost a year has passed since we broke up now. Your memories are fading bit by bit. Maybe I started to move on from you. Maybe I am still moving on from you. Whenever I passed through the places we shared moments together, I remember you, then I feel confused about my own feelings. It's okay now still, I able to ignore those feelings. I have gotten use to my life and the apartment without you around. I filled up the empty spaces bit by bit with the new ones. I have gotten myself busy with work now as well. I barely get time to think of you now. But whenever I do, I remember you through the songs. But I no longer cry but stare outside at the sky wondering what you are doing and how your life is been. I want to ask you about it but, I forgot that I have already deleted your contact information. "Sigh. The sky looks beautiful today as well. It's not that bad now that we are apart."
