my life is nothing special. its just full of boringness. no one love me no one like no aim what to do what not to do . sometimes i thought i am so lonely that i have no one to love me but its doesn't matter to anyone. whenever i like someone he even doesn't look at me. i wish i would have someone who love me the most the way i am.

hi i am alix and i am 22 years old an ordinary guy who search a lover who only love me.

i have a brother who is opposite to me. most handsome most wanted men and everyone loves him. he is the one i hate most in my life. i know he is my brother but i jealous of him that everyone love him not me even one person in my life who cares about me all can do only care about my brother harry. harry my brother who is 5 years older than me. In our childhood i only criticised by everyones that i am not that good like him. i always think about it that why why he's so lucky that everyone's love him not me. When we grow my jealousy also growing. I want to run away from him that no one compares us. I hope that if i seprate from him may be someone like me. Then i decided to leave my house and run away from my brother harry.

That day when i trying to leave my house i met first time my brother's best friend ben and my heart's beats so fast i can't tell anyone that how would feel that time. Ben he is my brother's best friend who is more handsome than harry. Ben when i first time meet him i fell in love with him. suddenly i feel like my life is full of happiness. whenever i saw him i deeply fell in love with him. But i know he will never love me back.

oh i saw ben in cafe he look so handsome that i can't control my self to stare him secretly. oh no i ruined now ben saw me to stare at him. now he know about me that i secretly watch him does he hate me now like everyone do. i have to run from this cafe.

Ben what he thought about me. How i face to him next time. May be i have no next time to meet him. I cried but who cares for me. I have only one reason to be happy but now that was be lost.

Hi I am ben.

Hi I am alix.

Ben: can i talk to harry?

Alix: oh it's Ben does he forget about yesterday. Forget it who's know what ben think about me ?

Alix: Harry it's ben talk to him.

it's an hour Harry talk with ben how long they talk with each other? If ben told harry that i secretly watch him harry will not forgive me about this.

alix: harry what would you eat in dinner?

Harry : alix i know what you would trying to hide from me ?

alix: me me what should i hide something from you😁😁.

Harry: I know yesterday you were not go to school ben told me about yesterday.

Alix: Ben told you what what.... ben told you about me?

Harry: That he saw you in a cafe and you ran away when you saw him🤨🤨.

Alix: oh 🙂😁😁 yes i saw him at cafe but i thought i caught that's why i ran away.

Harry: you are such a weirdo 🙄🙄.

Alix: what what just happened? did ben really know abot my feelings ? may be he feel the same way i have ? no no it can't happened. i have to meet ben and told him about my feelings for him. I can't take it any more 😞😞

alix messages to ben:

alex: I want to meet you will you come tomorrow at same cafe to meet me?

Three hours later.

Alix: why can't he give me answer? Does he know why should i want to meet him ? oo i am so confused right now.

what the **** 🙄🙄. He read my message but not reply to me . It means he know about my feelings and he feel disgusted with me that he now ignore me 😭😭.

Message from ben.

Ben: ok we will meet at cafe 3:30pm.

Next day:

Alix: should i tell him that i like him no no I can't if he knows the truth he feel uncomfortable with me. ohhh what should i do 😔😔😔.

Ben : why were you meet me in cafe. Is anything happened ?

Alix: no no nothings happened with me.I want to meet you because i want to explain what happened that day why i ran away after see you that day 🙂🙂

Ben: oh i know why were you ran away that day.

Alix : what did ben know already? i am finished now😞😞😞

Ben : what happened to you why you are pale.

alix: nothing just i remember something. Now do you hate me ben?

Ben: why would i hate you ? it's normal you have nothing to worry about it harry told me that day you have important meeting with your family so you ran away😁😁.

Alix: what ?? why Harry tell ben a lie 🤔🤔

wait that means he don't know that i secretly watching him😁😁😔😔

After that meeting Alix and Ben becomes good friend. They are always hangout together. whenever they hangout together Alix feelings for him increases. Alix always think about him always dream about Ben. Ben always make him feel that may be he like alix just like he like him. One day alix decided to tell him about his feeling. He wanted to meet him and tell him that he likes him so much that he can't describe in words.

Next day alix go to meet Ben. Suddenly he saw ben with his friends. He call Ben but ben did not hear him.

alix: I have to go and tell Ben that i like him.

Ben's friends: where are you Ben all that time ? you never hangouts with us. Do you have a girlfriend?

Ben: No I have not a girlfriend. I am busy with alix.

Ben's friends: why were you hangout with that creepy ugly idiot. You don't know he is stupid gay?

Ben: No i don't know about this but!!

Ben's friends: But what are you saying? we can't understand what you are saying?

Ben: I want to tell you guys that all i did because of Harry.

Alix: what because of Harry? Alix thinking 😔😔

Ben's friends: what! Harry told you to do this?🤨🤨

Ben: yes harry told me that i hangout with Alix. Because he wants to know about alix like guy or not. Thats why i hangout with that idoit guy alix. When i hangout with him he always stare at me nonstop that feel me disgusted 😏😏. He is such an idiot . all he do his ben what do you like Ben what do you like to do eat Ben Ben Ben i feel irritating now but all i do to make a fake smile in my face🙂🙂. when will he confess to me about his love then i told Harry about him and i will be free from this silly guy alix 😔😔.

Alix: Ben know about that I like him but he always play a game with me. If he want to know about me just asked me.

Alix: what the **** he did to me i never forgive you for this Ben. I always think that you are the one who care for me. I am such a looser that i always thought that may be you like me may be 😢😢. Harry I hate you what you did to me i always hate you 😞😞.

Why why why no one like me? Why am i ugly that Ben feel disgusted with me? why i have feel so much pain in my heart 😢😢 why god hate me that he never care for me at all he never give me what i want 😭😭😭

Alix crying all the day and he hurting himself. He is thinking of suicide once but he did not do that.

Alix: what i do now i can't handle the pain of my heart. i can't seen on Ben's eyes now. All i can do now is run away from Ben forever. I always think that if i tell about my feelings to ben my heart will break if he say no. Finally finally my heart break 🙂😞😞😢😢😭😭😭😭. I deserve this because i was wrong . I was wrong because i am a guy and i don't love another guy 😢😢😭😭