Origin:

I wanted lots of love, but nobody was willing to give it to me.

Was it because I wasn’t obedient?

Why does everyone want to abandon me?

But even if it’s like this, I won’t give up hope.

I know that there isn’t someone that could certainly stay with one until they grew old.

If I had a second life,

I definitely don’t want to be like this.

Just staying alive for the purpose of staying life.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

It really is very exhausting. A very strange feeling.

My mouth felt very obscure and there was an intense feeling of hunger.

After an exhausting struggle to waken, I finally opened my eyes and discovered that my hand held a lotus leaf. What was even more depressing was that my mouth also had that obscure and strange odor. It was the smell of this lotus leaf.

What was this disorderly circumstance, ah…….

Why would I be at this type of exquisite, ancient lakeside pavillion? Why would she be stupid to the point of eating a lotus leaf? Why is her stomach so hungry, ah?

With her dizzy and blurry vision, she realised that she had gotten scared…..

In front of her, Burts of urgent footsteps could be heard accompanied by melodious and surprised voice. “Miss, miss, Aunt Qing found delicious things!”

Food? Without thinking, she snatched the things in the other person’s hands. Several pastries nearly fell on the floor alongside some chicken legs that had already had a few bites taken out of it. Wu wu wu wu…… She wolfed down the food.

Wu wu wu wu. If this was during an ordinary time, she wouldn’t even glance at these things that were usually given to the dogs to eat!

Her stomach finally stopped protesting. The voice once again sounded out, carrying a bit of a sobbing tone, “Miss, enjoy your meal, don’t choke. Aunt Qing’s to blame, she can’t find food, allowing Miss to be hungry to this extent.”

Satisfied, she rubbed her stomach. She finally lifted her head up, seriously and clearly looking at the person in front of her: the person looked to be about seventeen or eighteen with a delicate face. Their hair was combed into two buns, one on the right and the other on the left side of her head. They wore a green garment…… The clothing was extremely traditional, one of a maid from a soap opera.

Eh, who came to inform her of her current condition?

Okay, her only concern was herself. She had no mother and no father. She led a talented life with intelligence and adaptation. With good intentions, she saved an elderly lady crossing the street, afterward, she lost consciousness. After awakening, she discovered that she became a “Miss” and also saw a servant girl from the ancient times.

Out of habit, she extended her fingers to cover her temple and ponder. She just discovered a big question: How did her hand become so small, it was like one of a five or six year old child.

“Ah, how could it be like this?”

When these words came out, she hurriedly closed her lips. Such a breastfed sounding and smelling voice [1], it couldn’t have been produced by her, right?

“Miss, what’s going on?” That Aunt Qing worriedly asked, holding onto her body.

Rising up, she went towards the lake. The clear lake water reflected the image of a child with fair and jade-like skin. Embedded in her circular and apple-shaped face were a pair of big, bright and beautiful eyes that were presently filled with disbelief. She had long eyelashes, a delicate nose, cherry colored soft lips, and soft black hair that was put into two cute buns.

Very adorable, ah! Don’t tell me, this was herself?

She let out a dispirited breath. She needed time to clear her head and think about whether or not she really reincarnated in someone else’s body, just like the stories from the legends. Although, she felt unreconciled to the fact that she was twenty and in the prime of her life when she substituted for an elderly lady, entering her current situation and re-living life wasn’t necessarily impossible.

Ancient times, ah! Let her first faint, OK!

[1] breastfed sounding and smelling voice – a childish sounding voice

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She finally understood how this adorable little girl died.

The answer caused her to become speechless. That’s right, she died of starvation. One character, cruel!

Her mother was just the servant girl of a manor who had been stained by the master of the manor when he was under the influence. After becoming pregnant, she was bullied by the several madams of the manor. Then, she had a complicated birth and died in the process. So, the child was entrusted to a close friend. This close friend was Aunt Qing, the servant girl who looked after her (the main character), and up until now, she still hadn’t been given a name. Aunt Qing called her Miss and others called her Za Zhong [1]. She was frequently humiliated and destitute. Being beaten or cursed was a common occurrence. It was no wonder that her white and tender skin was filled with bruises. What a pitiful child, your death freed you. But, you’ve added more hardship to my, Gu Weiyi’s, life, ah…….

Now, one could only keep moving forward, the situation had already started.

Aunt Qing was third madam’s maid. Third madam’s personality was crafty and harsh, she would beat and scold subordinates. Only after the noon and evening meal would Aunt Qing have a chance of seeing her (Gu Weiyi) and giving her food. This time wasn’t always accurate either, some days, she (Aunt Qing) wouldn’t come to see her at all. Just like now, she had already been starved for an entire day. It’s no wonder this body died of starvation.

Rubbing her stomach, it had already begun grumbling again. Letting out a resigned sigh, she began to look for more food.

Raising her small body up, she began to sneak her way towards the kitchen.

By now, the evening meal had ended a while ago and the kitchen staff were no longer busy. She was only going to try her luck and see whether or not there were any leftovers.

They were truly worthy to be called a rich and honorable household, even their kitchen was big enough to intimidate people. She tiptoed inside and climbed on top of the kitchen stove, then with great effort, she opened the enormous pot.

Wu wu wu wu, unexpectedly, it was a pot of boiling water!

Don’t worry, don’t worry. Don’t be discouraged, continue looking…….

Oh, there were three leftover steamed buns that were still warm! There was also a small bowl of chicken soup. Tonight, she finally didn’t have to go hungry.

She quickly decided to eat two steamed buns and leave one for Aunt Qing. She was also frequently hungry, ah. Presently, it was time for the bowl of chicken soup. She, Gu Weiyi, had stayed here for the greater part of a month. At last, she could eat meat again.

She had just brought the bowl to her lips when she heard someone loudly suck in their breath. “Who!”

“Pu tong [1]…..”

A voice able to shatter pottery and porcelain sounded out. The little bowl dropped on the floor, breaking into thousands of pieces and juice spilled everywhere.

Wu wu wu, her chicken soup, ah……

A large red lantern lit up and a plump dashen [2] appeared in front of her. She recognized this person because she had already explored around the kitchen for numerous days, this was the main cook, Fu Ma. One time, she was fortunate enough to be able to steal some braised lion’s head pork meatballs that Fu Ma had made– – the remainders. That flavor was something one never forgot in their lifetime, ah.

Fu Ma was a good-natured person, this could be seen from her interactions with her (Gu Weiyi) and other subordinates. Nothing could be done, now, she had to make use of her adorable doll face and act pitiful.

“Wu wu wu wu, so hungry, want to eat food……”

Forgive her for using this childish method to win sympathy. In this world, the thing that didn’t allow people to set defenses against was precisely a child’s tears.

Over the past few days, Fu Ma discovered that the food had been decreasing. Thus, she began to suspect that someone was stealing it, so tonight she had been in the kitchen, waiting all along. But, she never would’ve thought that the thief was a child who was approximately five years old. Upon seeing the child’s mournful tears, she panicked and promptly went over and carried her (Gu Weiyi) into her (Fu Ma’s) embrace.

“Don’t cry, don’t cry. Ai you [3], where did this child come from, how could she be starved to this extent? Truly sinful, ah! Where is your mom?”

She blinked her big, watery eyes and mournfully sobbed, “No mother, so hungry, wu wu wu wu….”

Distressed, Fu Ma brought the jia huo [4] even closer. “Don’t cry, Fu Ma will find food for you, be good.” After saying that, she stood up and took out two baked sesame seed coated cakes from the top level of one of the cupboards. Gu Weiyi wasn’t polite, taking the cakes, she devoured them.

“Yes, eat slowly. Drink some water, don’t choke.” Fu Ma’s soft voice sounded in her ear. Gu Weiyi’s heart was grieved and her tears dropped down.

“Ai you, how come you’re crying again?” Fu Ma was bewildered, how could such an adorable child cry so much her appearance caused one’s heart to hurt.

“No, nobody has treated me as good as Fu Ma…….” Choked with emotion, Gu Weiyi cried even louder.

Fu Ma hurriedly gathered her little body closer and comforted her, “Don’t cry. In the future, ah, Fu Ma will be good to you. Following this, you ah, come to Fu Ma’s place and eat good food every day.”

“Really?” Gu Weiyi’s tears turned into laughter. Out of excitement, she loudly kissed Fu Ma’s face with two “pu pu” sounds, causing Fu Ma to joyously laugh. “Really is a good child.”

[1] Za Zhong – this can be loosely translated to ‘mixed breed’

[2] Pu tong – the sound of an object falling into water

[3] dashen – the wife of her father’s older brother

[4] Ai you – similar to “Oh my”

[5] jia huo – could be loosely translated to either fellow or child

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Ever since she formed an intimate relationship with Fu Ma, this “wealthy person”, she, Gu Weiyi, finally had good days. Each time the manor had a feast, she would always secretly run to the kitchen when it had finished. There, there were many yummy things left over by Fu Ma for her. The rest of her time was spent amusing herself or losing herself in her thoughts in the pavillion she woke up in that day. There was a small abandoned garden there that usually didn’t have anyone visiting it. She could stay in there and be at ease until Aunt Qing came to call her back. Although these days were boring, at least there was no one to bully or humiliate her. They could be considered smooth and steady.

The second half of the month passed, Gu Weiyi passed her days the same way a pig would- when she finished eating, she would sleep and when she woke up, she would eat. She didn’t have to strive to study. Didn’t have to da gong [1]. She didn’t need to stay up late at night nor suffer through a boss’s abuse. And she didn’t have to make a living in order to struggle to live in society. This sort of tranquil life was actually exceptionally beautiful.

Taking off her shoes, she stepped into the lake and the feeling of the cold water made her let out a pleased breath. The little fishes in the water also swam over, kissing the soles of her feet. Sharp and clear “ge ge” sounds could be heard as her young and melodious laughter rang beside the pavilion. As the sun was setting, she became tired from playing and climbed on top of the pavilions fence to sleep.

In a daze, she didn’t no how long she slept for, by the time she woke up, it was already pitch dark. The frogs and insects of the summer all repeatedly called out and the soft, bright light of the round moon spilled out, allowing one to faintly see the surrounding scenery to be faintly visible.

Strange, why didn’t Aunt Qing call for her today? Looking around, she could see that it was already late and her disobedient stomach also began to sing songs. With an empty mouth, she sat up.

It really is very strange, ai. On the road, she didn’t see any servant girls or little manservants and when she ran inside the kitchen, it was a chaotic mess inside. There wasn’t even one person, forget about there even being food.

What can be done, ah? If she wanted to go look for Aunt Qing, she would need to pass by the manor’s large hall. If she was found by one of those little concubines, she would surely suffer a miserable death.

The maids’ quarters were located in the rear court and the kitchen just happened to be in the opposite direction. Usually, Aunt Qing didn’t want her to go looking for her, to avoid a beating. But, currently, Fu Ma was also absent and she was so hungry, ah.

She didn’t care anymore and decided to test her luck, she may not even bump into anyone.

Following the long corridor, she lightly ran. The thumping sounds she produced seemed abnormally clear in the empty night. She suddenly stopped, if someone heard her it wouldn’t be good. She softly and quietly walked out of the corridor and made her way to the large hall.

There was a strange sweet fishy smell in the air that was rather nauseating. Gu Weiyi’s head felt somewhat dizzy and her stomach suddenly felt queasy, she really wanted to throw up, ah….

From far away, she spotted the large hall. Leaning against the wall, her small head went inside to explore. It was dead silent, nobody was alarmed. Patting her chest, she felt relieved and strode inside. Turning around, in the main hall, there were people! But it was very strange, those several bodyguards were all lying on the floor and the bloody smell in the air was even more condensed.

A bad premonition rushed forward in her heart and she hoped that it wasn’t what she thought. Walking over, she crouched down and turned that person’s body over and stumbled, falling onto the floor.

Blood, blood was all over their entire body! Their eyes were wide open with fright and their body was strangely twisted. Under the moonlight, they expressed extreme fear.

Vomit…

Goodness, what’s going on! Did someone massacre the manor? These people dying didn’t matter, but the two people, Aunt Qing and Fu Ma, were good to her. She couldn’t help but worry, ah!

Her eyes were slightly red, Gu Weiyi forced herself to become cool headed. She must find Aunt Qing and Fu Ma!

Walking further inside the large hall, it was filled with dead servant girls and bodyguards. There were also several beautifully clothed females, presumably they were her cheap father’s concubines. Resisting her fear and disgust, she began to look one by one, none of them (the bodies) were them (Aunt Qing and Fu Ma)! Letting out a breath, she half staggered and half ran out.

In her panic, she randomly chose a road and looked around. She practically hadn’t walked around inside the manor, how could she possibly find the roads. Gu Weiyi had some desperate tears, she had always been a strong person, crying was a show of weakness. In fact, she cried very rarely. But a type of Asura-type purgatory scene was something that opened in movies. For a twenty year old girl, that was born in a peaceful decade, to personally experience such fear and helplessness was self evident. Let alone to say that she was currently a five year old little girl. With this small and weak body, if Aunt Qing and Fu Ma also died, how was she going to keep on living?

In front of her, she heard a noisy shout and saw the lantern’s light. Her heart was pleased and Gu Weiyi silently walked forward.

This was the back garden of a small courtyard, at this moment, it was fully packed with the shadows of other people. Ten or so masked people wearing black clothes had their backs turned towards her, they were filled with death and somber breaths. Across from them was a group of shivering men and women huddled together. Inside, there was two figures, one purple and one green. Looking at their appearances, they seemed to be about thirteen or fourteen years old. From Weiyi’s point of view, she couldn’t see their faces, but she could see that they were the only ones moving inside the group of people. In addition, there were those black clothed people respectfully standing, staring at them. These two youths were the eldest children! She faintly suspected, Gu Weiyi stretched her neck out.

She looked for Fu Ma and Aunt Qing’s figures in the group of people. As expected, she saw Aunt Qing and a small servant girl shivering and curled up together, nestled behind a large tree. But with these current conditions, how could she save her. Really is a headache, ah!

She hatefully stared over at the group of people, the middle-aged man being hugged by a flock of female children seemed to be her cheap father. The other servant girl was his little concubine and child. Die old man, you provoked some enemy family, didn’t raise me, and now you even want me to die alongside you? No way!

[1] da gong – this can be loosely translated to a job that’s temporary or casual

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