Karan pov :

Falling into dark abyss, nothing to hold onto not even the tiniest ray of light, and there was just pain through my skin to my bones.....

I am breathing the pain, each single breath feel like thorns piercing through my heart... I wish I could just end this painful torment right away but I have to find her...

Its been three or so years that I lost her...

Third person pov :

It was that new years night when life turned itself to face deaths... Endless deaths.. And after three years karan is still living in that hell... He lost desire to breathe anymore when he saw his Nadira burning in that explosion... And after that it all changed... He found each and every mafia and every business rival who could have caused that explosion and killed them one by one like a blood thirsty monster .. ..but inside of him was empty and silent that he became a living dead... He barely spoke leave alone to smile...

Karan was laying on the floor as cold as ice but he was looking like more that of an ice.. The day he lost Nadira his heart became cold as ice. Laying there in the room filled with Nadira's things, the bed they used to sleep and each thing that Nadira demanded like a spoiled child and bought uselessly with closed eyes... He was immersed in the her memories...

He had so much to tell her, like how she asked him to get married in childhood... And wanted her to remember those times...

Times when...

{old memories of childhood}

It was the period when Karan's father was busy setting up business in different cities but something came up that they had to stay in Nagpur for a quiet year.. But when karan's father was away busy with the business his step mother was busy starving karan, making him do all labor work and if she was irritated she used to beat him..

15 years old Karan was beaten by his step mother to the point he was bleeding, he ran out of the house and hid himself in the garden behind the big tree...

This little boy was so exhausted and in pain that he fell asleep under the tree...

After an hour when he finally woke up he found a doll like little girl standing in front of him blocking the sunlight from waking him up...

For a moment Karan thought she was a fairy or an angel... Like his guardian angel... But that little girl pull out her handkerchief to wipe the blood on his forehead and torn lip... But as it has been an hour the blood dried and couldn't be wiped...

It was the first time that someone was showing warmth to him without that woman's fear...

When she couldn't wipe the wound she asked him in the soft voice... " why aren't you crying... You know I cried so much today when I fell and hurt my knee.. See.. It was bleeding but Nani ( maternal grandmother) shooed it away by magic and pain went away.."

Karan : what magic..

Little girl : should I show you....

Little girl closed her eyes and and and blew on the wound softly..

Later she chattered like a unstoppable machine and Karan kept smiling and laughing on her silly talks and questions...

It was first time after his mother's death that someone was talking to him so much and he was laughing..

Little girl : Are you rich..?

Karan : No..! But my father is.... Why..?

Little girl : I wanted to have that toy ( pointing at girl with barbie doll) but Nani said only rich people can buy that... ( pout).. And you are not rich too..

Karan : Well... What will you give me if I buy that doll for you...

Little girl : I'll give you my candy..

Karan : It's not worth it..

Little girl : (pouting) then...

Karan : Its a really expensive doll... You have to think of something more precious...

Little girl : How petty... Okay I will marry you if you buy me that doll..

Karan : you are quite sincere... Okay I'll buy it for you once I make money...

Little girl : How long will it take...

Karan : I don't know... But I promise I will definitely buy you that doll...

After that these two used to hang out together at there secret hide out.... And karan became more like a kid with the company of Little Nadira...

______

Present..

As the door was locked from inside John kept banging on the door from outside..

John : Karan... Brother please open the door.... Please.. Don't do anything to yourself..

Yes.. Karan tried to kill himself many times... And almost died drowning in the bathtub.. If it wasn't for John he would have been dead by then..

John ran out of the mansion and jumped up the pipe and climbed up to the gallery... Broke down the glass and entered through there... Only to find room filled with smoke of cigarettes and there was barely any oxygen left....

He opened all the windows and door and picked Karan up...

John : What the hell do you think you are doing.... Have you ever thought about us.. Me Vishakha... What about us if you were to die..

Karan : you want me to live...

John : yes... Please..

Karan : and with what reason... My wife died... She burned in front of my eyes... My best friend in dead my many brothers died... I don't know how many kids became orphan because of me.. How many people lost their loved ones in that explosion... And you want me to live... On what basis...

It were just few words... But these were the most number of words Karan said in these few years...

John couldn't answer anything, words stuck in his chest and he walked out of the room... He was so childish and immature before.. But now its only him who takes care of everyone around him Karan, Vishakha, and business too...

He could barely hold it in and now his eyes filled with tears... He cried silently .. ...

And went back to take karan to hospital....

Doctor : His condition has deteriorated than before... But still I would say that he is suffering more mentally and emotionally than physically... If you can make him feel better with anything please do that..

John : I wish I could do that..

Docter : see this kind of wounds can only be cured with the help of person who is responsible... But we can't be of any help here... If only he let go of the hope that the people he lost are still alive he can recover from the trauma...

John : so are you saying that he thinks that Nadira is not dead...

Docter : probably...

John clenched his fist and pursed his mouth not making any sound...

Docter : but here we can have another hope... Like if he accepts the reality he will overcome it soon.. But still we can only provide external help of medication.. Its his desire if he wants to leave the the past or live in the past.

Two days later

When John returned to the room where karan was on bed unconscious he had to keep quite not to wake him up... While Vishakha was sitting next to him staring blankly, only she knew what was going on in her mind...

After losing her love of life and her friend precious than life she changed a lot.. She is not the fashion queen she used to be not a fierce tigress.. But now she is just a simple woman who seems more aged than her real age..

John was startled when vishakha suddenly started saying.. " don't you think he became thinner than before..."

John :uh... Ahm.. That...

Vishakha :now that I look at it... You too became mature... But just..

John : aa.. I think he lost too much of weight... Why not we feed him more and take care of him..

Vishakha : is he a child... Why are we even bothering ourselves to take care of him when he gave up on himself... Don't we need him... Don't we need a support.. Aren't you and I are broken as him... Why isn't he getting his shit together and moving on why is he...

Vishakha couldn't finish what she wanted to and ended crying historically.... She never cried like this not even when she found out about Neel and Nadira's death... Probably the pain of losing everyone around her was so immense that she can hardly keep it in and break into tears... Probably the fear of losing Karan made her cry like this... There's no strength in her anymore to loose her loved ones..

When first she found out that she lost two most treasured people in her life she lost herself in pool of liquor... She drank until she couldn't anymore..... No one knows how many days it took her to regain her senses... It took a lot of time probably because there was no one to scold at her and put her into right posture..

When she finally opened eyes and got sober nothing was left to protect.... And from that day she began to blame herself for being unable to protect, for being useless and for being alive...

She thinks that if she wouldn't have been drinking like that she could handle the situation and karan wouldn't be like this a body without soul... She could at least do that much...

It didn't take long for her cries to wake karan up... He heard everything.... And somehow the dust in his eyes got cleared... And he finally realized that its not just him who is in pain who is miserable..... Its everyone around him who are just as broken as him.. And need him as support...... His breathing got heavier.... He ripped off the IV drip sitting back in the bed and looked at Vishakha and John.... John ran to him as he saw Karan trying stand up to give him support....

Karan : It's okay... It's not like I am dead that you have to carry me..

He refused to take support from John but still hugged him like a proud father and Vishakha squeezed in too for hug...

When John felt that his Elder brother came back and he no longer need to stand strong he broke into tears and let go of all the piled up burden and whipped like a child...

John have always been a senseless boy who always kept fooling around.... All this time when he had to take responsibility the fear and failures made him quite tough.. But that little boy was locked up somewhere inside him... Now he can let go of the worries and can rely on someone...

Karan patted both of them and promised to himself that he will protect the people around him and cherish them, as life is unpredictable and you can make yourself just an ingredient to it so he decided to bury the pain and sorrow deep inside so that not to hurt those who are alive and need him..

It wasn't much but the three hugged each other and promised to start a fresh start of new life, looking at the descending sun....

____________

Six months later...

In the middle of the night Karan wake up from the nightmare... Even after taking sleeping pills these nightmares never let him sleep...

He got up and kept staring at Nadira's huge picture on the wall.... He is just waiting for the day he will meet his Nadira in the afterlife... He kept staring for a while and then smiled to himself... Probably he wanted to show her

His bright side only... So he learnt to smile even when it pains a lot...

In the morning he as always went to office and meetings.... Working here and there...

Matthew came in the evening to karan's office..

Karan smiled at mathew and went to hug him..

Mathew lost his left eye and hand in the explosion, explosion also left a few scars on his body.. But things now are getting better...

Karan : Matt, aren't you going home...

Matthew : until when are you going to pretend to be okay... Just cry it out man..

Karan : my crying won't change anything... And with this situation I can at least see her in front of me...

Matthew : Let's go to the doctor..

Karan : I don't need one...

Matthew : Think about john and vishakha... Do you want to leave them again after going insane...

Karan : Nothing will happen to me... At least they are happy...

Matthew : f*ck with the happiness... No one's happy here... Everyone's just pretending to be happy... You too stop pretending..

Karan : enough... Let's go I'll drop you home...

Matthew : Crazy bastard..

Karan : let's go...

(2 years after the explosion)

Brightly shining morning sun on the dew drop ...the dew drop sparkle as sliding down the leaf... this was the beautifull sceene outside ...this sparkly sun peeps inside from slightly open window and irritates the soundly sleeping eyes..

annoyed by the brightness she covers her eyes and solemnly wakes up ... ..

Manager : come on wake up...

her manager Alina enters the room with i-pad in her hands and ear pod in ears....

manager: Hey Kiara just wake up...don't oversleep you have advertisement shoot today...we can't have your face swollen..

Kiara : stop yelling.. I'm already awake..

manager: That's great..

kiara : Do you believe I can do this... I mean I don't have much of experience and it's a big brand...

manager: Do you know why I chose to be with you and assist you..

kiara looks at Alina and shook her head lightly..

Alina :silly...it's your fighting spirit and natural talent which made me fall for you... I wouldn't have accepted you just because max insisted...now come on get goinn...

Alina is one of the top most manager of modeling industry who have managed super models and big stars.. And on request of Maximus she accepted Kiara ..

now who is Kiara...??? you will know when it's right time...

After the the successful shoot of advertisement Kiara got quite a fame and many new assignments which became take off for her modeling career and she gain back the lost confidence and became professional at her job...

_________________

Present day : Dubai

Kiara was practicing her sreept with Alina when Maximus entered ..

Maximus: Wassup Ladies...

Kiara: Hello mr.Maximus ..

Alina:owh..hey max..we are practicing Kiara's new endorsement sreept..

Maximus: That's kinda great...what's it about...

Alina : it's a top brand ...you even know how we managed to get this job...you know after this advertisement our Kiara have chances to appear at Victoria's secret...God this is great...kiara you just have to be professional okay..

Alina was blabbing so much but max kept looking at Kiara unknowingly smiling at her...and lost in thought for just few seconds but he can recall everything in just those few seconds and his smile fades away..

"Unexpected explosion and fire of death everywhere and unconscious Nadira in his arms somehow he managed to save her from burning but he himself burned his arm... he couldn't save anyone else but when he saw that Nadira was safe without a scratche he was relieved... but when he finally came to sea shore he found Nadira was bleeding... she had miscarried.... he thought Karan and others were dead so he took her with him... though later he found out only Neel was no more and others are safe including Karan... but Nadira already lost all of her memories and could only recall few of the blurry moments ... so he kept her only to himself and named her Kiara...he wanted to keep her as secret all life cause he assumed Karan failed to protect her so he doesn't deserve her anymore... no one knows what made him think this way.... it's only when he discovered that she have talent for modeling and she is happy to do this.. that's when he went to Alina and that's when Alina became Nadira's mentor and Manager..

as for Nadira with those blurry memories it took everything out of her to become a normal person... but the unknown pain in her emotions only told her she misses someone... as if she doesn't belong here... as if someone is waiting for her, her family or someone who was as close or someone who meant life for her... she tried everything but her memories denied to come back... slowly she started thinking of them as dream she couldn't recall or sometimes nightmares.. ... nightmares like fire and blurry faces sometimes laughing sometimes angry....weird words ...herself bleeding and that so bad feeling of missing someone she doesn't even know...

after when Alina was done talking Maximus got up and left without saying anything.. two days later at the add shoot Kiara came out of the changing room without changing into the clothes provided to her by the stylist...

Alina: what happened...

Kira: I think something is wrong..

Alina: what now....

Kira :......um... Max Called just now ... He said he was here..

Alina: What... um well you drink this I'll go talk to the director.. and look for max too..

Alina came back saying that the shooting was canceled....

kiara:well... what...if they blame us for breach of contract...

Alina: no...max caused a scene.... well let's go you need to calm him down..

________

Director : Sir please don't pull out the investment...we will do as you say...

Maximus: Shhh...you dare to go against on words... on my words... I remember I clearly told you that she won't be wearing these bickney...do you still want to continue in the industry or not...

Kiara reached there and held Max back ..

Kiara: Max... no... please stop..

max looks in director's eye with rage and told him to scram..

Kiara :Are you trying to ruin my career or what...

kiara said in funny manner... of course she can't say such things in anger to Max ... cause she knows max is her savior and right now he is her only family... so she well behaves herself in front of him..

Max: You didn't shoot anything wearing only bickney did you...

kiara: Max... I am a model and it's normal for models to wear those clothes right...

Max: Kiara...

even though Kiara was always well behaved, listening her saying this max couldn't control his anger... and as he grabbed her hand tightly saying : don't ever think I'll allow you such thing...

kiara was already holding in a lot ..Max never told her where she come from.. how he met her... what relationship do they have ... and why she can't remember anything...and hearing his words Kiara's eyes filled with tears...

kiara: Who am I to you... why you control my life ...

max kept quiet and wiped her tears away.... meanwhile Alina came ... looking at both of them she wondered what are they to each other...

next day Alina and Kiara left for new York city...where Kiara had to shoot for a magazine..

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Hey guys I hope you all are healthy and safe .... sorry that I couldn't keep up with the updates .