...—...

...Regret, love, just living....

...—...

Like every other being, Alice had always been different all it took was one look at her. From the moment forth nothing had been the same, nothing would ever be.

All her life, all her seventeen years of living, Alice had never felt more alive. The journey she took to self discovery was worth it, Samantha was worth it.

She looked her mother dead in the eyes, her face showing no emotion. “Don’t worry I’ll keep your place warm right beside your homosexual child.”

Her mother’s face was full of disgust, how did everything go south. She punched the hard metal causing Alice to jerk up, she rose from her seat. “You’re an abomination, you—” she held her index finger up pointing at Alice, “Are not my child.”

Alice’s lips curled into a mischievous smirk, she looked at the woman from her toes to her head, their eyes meeting. “Oh I’m so hurt.” she said full of sarcasm, just like her mother she got off the metal seat. “Thank’s for the visit, but let’s not do this anytime soon.” with those words said she started heading towards the door.

“Change your ways!” her mother shouted which got a reaction from her, she turned facing her mother again. They looked like they were pleading, for anything, even hate but Alice gave nothing away.

Alice brought her index finger pointing first to her mother, then to her own head. “Change your mentally.” she addressed her mother, the tone she gave out was full of venom.

Her feet carried her once again away from the woman she once called mother. With a pale face and a frown upon her lips, Mrs. Avery May watched her child walk away with no look back, slowly the grey uniform disappeared behind the mental door.

Alice threw herself on the thin bed with the less spacious room, even though it BLI, the place abused them it was better off then her family, at least she got attention.

In the moment of over thinking, her daily work out routine her eyes began to get heavy, and slowly the darkness consumed her.

For the first time in months, Alice had slept without the effect of the sleeping pills they were given daily. Sadly for her it was all short lived, with a grip of a cold hand she was brought back to reality. Her eyes swung open, in sight where the two most scary men.

She knew exactly what was going to happen with a growl no one could hear, they dragged her off to the correction room.

The thing about this men, they had no respect, none they were animals. They threw her in the chair then strapped her in place, once they were sacrificed with their handy work, their boss walked in, Ms. Baffle.

The short grey haired woman walked in, with her usual attire of horrible clothes. Her eyes moved from Alice, she shook her head before her mouth opened. “So I’ve heard you disrespected your mother, clearly nothing we’ve been doing is working. You never listen do you?” there was dead silence from the other end, Ms. Baffle raised her brows in amusement, “Okay, that game again.”

Alice remained silence once more, from all the times she has been in that seat or the countless times she has encountered Ms. Baffle, not answering was always the right key. With a sigh she gestured the man on the left, “Connect the wires Fredrik.”

Alice’s eyes followed Fredrik as he connected the wires to the chair. In that moment Ms. Baffle had approached the lever, she brought her lips close to her ear. “Alice May, I’m going to enjoy my time with you.” her words slowly faded as a wave of electricity passed through her body.

And that was another day at Block Lesdar institution.

...—...

...Like every other day...

...—...

Her eyes opened, heavy and still full of sleep she trailed to all corners of her cell, there were no noises no lights were on. She had once again woken up before the day began, she had not gotten any sleep not once.

She sat upright the tiny blanket slipped off her body, exposing her ugly grey sleeping uniform. With disgust all over her face she brought her palm to her face, growling in frustration, she was tired of everything.

She brought her face back up, instantly Samantha came running through her mind. “If only I could see you and know your alright.” she whispered to her self, the burning sensation she had been ignoring for months finally broke free, tears rolled down her eyes but no sound came through her mouth.

She curled herself up into a little ball, her tears rolling down her cheeks like a stream, her arms held her tight. The way she always wanted to be held the day Samantha was taken from her, she was in seek of love.

After what seemed to be like hours, her tears stopped flowing with her palms she wiped away the marks and the last drops of tears. Her room, or you might call it cell was open, the day had began and like any other day the routine must be kept. She was off her bed in the blink of an eye off to the screening room, she walked behind one of the girls she saw from time to time, they made their way in an orderly manner, the manners they were told to always up hold.

Alice walked lazily, she was tired her muscles were killing her with every step she took, her tummy was gambling from hunger. “Just a few hours and we’ll go eat, hold on.” she whispered under her breath, holding to her stomach like it would fall off. If it weren’t for the missed meal yesterday, this morning she would be handling everything a lot better.

She sat on her usual seat, the front row, she was strictly prohibited from sitting anywhere else, all thanks to Ms. Baffle. The lights went dim, and the clip played for the one hundredth time, the clip of how everything should be. Who should date who, how everyone is supposed to behave and why we are supposed to do it.

The hours passed by slowly, with every passing moment, Alice would feel her tummy growing even louder. She was tired, depressed, hungry, being tortured what a perfect life for a seventeen year old who would be finishing secondary.

When the last scene played, she practically rejoiced though the food from this place was never good enough nor healthy. In the lines they came, they left in them to the dinning hall.

The room was dim, despite the lack of curtains plus the extra lights it still wasn’t good enough, it never would be it was a dark time, the sun didn’t need to come out.

Where Alice ate, her mind wondered to the words that brought her here, to the person and the day and everything hitting like flames her mind drifted with the words, ‘Alice don’t run, let them help you.’ playing in the background.

A little smile pasted on her mind when she remembered the good memories she had with Samantha, a positive thought to get her through the day.

They sat in the car, hand in hand in their little world. The world no one, not even they family knew about. Sam gave Alice a shy smile when their eyes met, in a moment of bliss Sam spoke. “I love you, Alice May.”

The foolish smile was evident on Alice’s face, with one tight hand squeeze she crushed her lips on hers. Emotions bursted in both of them, their lips where one, they always where when placed again eachother.

When their kiss broke apart, Alice looked Sam in the eyes, love and lust filled both their eyes and bodies. “I love you, Samantha Blue.” they kissed once again but this time Sam initiated the kiss.

Later that day, she went home to her mother her sister was out again like she always was.

She approached her mother who was deep in conversation with someone over the phone, when her mother noticed her she placed her hand over the speaker. “Anything you want?” her voice was barely audible.

“I’m spending the night and rest of the day at Sam’s.” of course her mother nor Sam’s couldn’t suspect anything, to them they where just great friends. Her mother agreed with a nod which lead Alice to run up the stairs to pack.

Alice arrived at Sam’s not a minute too late, the advantage of being neighbors. She let herself in like any other day, her mother was at work and so was her brother, she went directly to Sam’s room with her bag pack.

Sam was laid beautifully on the bed in a large t-shirt with a book in her arm, when she heard the door open her eyes trailed to meet her girlfriend’s, they both smiled. Alice closed the door behind her walking towards the bed the bag was dropped to the floor.

She sat beside Sam, her eyes not trying to hide the hint of her admiring the beauty in front of her. Sam smiled when she noticed Alice was lost of words, she placed her book aside before heading over to Alice’s lap. “Today” she whispered, Alice looked up to her trying to say something but Sam blocked her when she kissed her.

And that day, they loved eachother, they admired and showed eachother how much they loved.

Alice’s smile was still present on her face when John, one of the mannerless men gestured a bottle of pills in front of her. “May, medicine time. Take them like a good girl and today they won’t be and injections.” he placed the different coloured pills in front of her

Alice took them from his hands before she stood up and walked to the trash bin, like their food she threw the pills away while he was watching. His eyes flickered in annoyance, with her middle fingers raised up high she moved them in the air towards him before she hurried off to the halls.

She didn’t even make it to her cell when Fredrik got ahold of her, John followed with three injections both full. Like yesterday she would sleep like the dead and miss everything else, Alice was mostly kept asleep cause of her attitude and no one could ever get to her not even the shocks.

She felt the piercing on her lower arm, two more where followed after that. And slowing the world began to fade, her heart beat weakened her eyes fell closed.

The day Alice met Sam, was the day the Blue’s had just moved in. Alice was spying on them and her eyes couldn’t leave the girl her age she just saw.

Her sister, Mercy came into the room, spotting Alice by the window spying on the new family that was just moving in. “Stop being creepy, and come help downstairs.” hearing Mercy’s voice surprised her cause she didn’t know when she walked in, she simply shook her head and her eyes fell on the neighbors again.

While Sam was carrying one of the moving boxes, her eyes spotted Alice. To be friendly she gave her a wave and a smile but Alice in panic jumped off the window heading down stairs, leaving our new guest confused.

When she was in the kitchen her mum greeted her with a loving hug, “Help Mercy with that.” Alice agreed and walked towards the sink.

Once they had prepared the house welcoming food, the May’s where standing in front of the Blue’s front door. When the door bell was rung again, a woman about Avery stood there. “Oh come in, you must be the May’s. I’m Mrs. June Blue, we’re happy to have you.”

“Pleasures all ours for the invitation, I’m Avery May and these are my daughter’s Mercy and Alice.” Once the greeting and hand shaking was done, they all got into the house making there way to the dinning room.

Everyone was introduced, Mercy and Alice met Mike and Samantha as well as Mr. Blue. The dinner was soulful and full of chit chat, while Sam and Alice stole glances from one another time to time.

Mrs. Blue cleared her throat, “Alice and Sam, you two should get to know eachother. You might became besties.” once she stopped speaking, Alice looked into Sam’s eyes their mouths altered no word but their eyes spoke.

Only if their parents knew, it would be the start of something beautiful, so meaningful they wouldn’t be the same after today.

...—...

...Life–less...

...—...

Every morning all the supposed patient’s where taken to the screening room and the same clip would be played over and over till they got the concept of ‘Love’.

Alice followed the rest, every part of her aching. The clothes they gave her hung loosely on her fragile body, her beautiful brown curly hair had lost it’s shine and her eyes had lost the glow they once had.

The double doors opened exposing the screening room, all the chairs and the huge screen stood in it’s glory. Once everyone was seated the show began, the show they were forced to watch each day.

After the usual routine, Alice sat down and ate her breakfast. She looked at her food with a pale face, the eggs looked as though they hadn’t been cooked at all, the only thing that looked edible was the three slices of bread. With one stroke of her fork, the egg was making it’s way down her throat.

Time came for the usual Wednesday therapy session, they all sat down on the couches as they waited on Mr. Jones.

The wait was short lived when Mr. Jones bursted in, in his hand he had sheets of paper, he walked into the center of the room. “Write your thoughts down.” he said as he handed each one a sheet, “The most important memories that make you feel good, the ones that make you smile.” he finished off as he was walking across the room.

Once Alice got her’s her mind immediately thought of Sam and all the times she stuck around, with a smile spread across her face her hand started jotting down everything.

June 15th, 2018.

Alice was laying in bed, her body was weak. She had been sick for the past week now, and she was far from getting or feeling any better.

The door to her room opened and those brown eyes poked their way into the room, Alice wore a weak smile when Sam walked in with a bag of chips.

She walked over to her bed swinging the bags in the air, “How is my girl feeling today?” she jumped on the bed partially landing on Alice’s body.

“Ouch!” Alice said as she rubbed her palm against her side, she turned to her. “I think I was recovering but you made me—” her words where cut short when Sam pressed her lips on hers, Sam withdrew from the kiss before it could get any deep. With a smirk on her face, Sam laid on Alice’s shoulder, her face buried deep within her neck. “A lot better, much much better.”

And it was true, Alice couldn’t deny it, it was all true. She placed her hand over Sam’s head running her fingers through her dark hair, she kissed her on the forehead before speaking. “I missed you baby, but get away from me, I’ll give you the flu.” she tried to move away but Sam pulled her even closer.

Her face brushed Alice’s neck, “Then we’ll get sick together, that would be a good reason to sleep in here all week.” she giggled as she pulled Alice closer.

“But you don’t look good when you’re sick love.” Alice spoke, they held eachother even closer. Sam shifted uncomfortably in Alice’s arm, “Yeah right, you just don’t want me to sleep with you.” she sat up getting a hold of the snacks.

Alice sat up as well following sam’s lead, she got ahold of Sam’s hand squeezing she spoke. “You of all people know, I would love you around but not sick.”

Sam gave her a hopeful smile, she gestured the bag of chips in the air, “Now, let’s eat these.” she threw one bag towards Alice who took it with a wide smile.

Laughter filled the room and for a moment Alice forgot she was ever sick, that’s what Sam did, she always made her forget and feel alive, for once in her life she was truly living.

Once everything was jotted down, the ink stopped flowing into the paper. The piece of paper was handed to Mr. Jone, the only human being in this place who had humanity, he wasn’t anything special despite being Ms. Baffle’s pet, he was a good man inside.

Alice was seated when Ms. Baffle come into the room, fury written all over her face. Alice’s eyes trailed to her left hand, there was a piece of paper cramped up in her fist.

She threw the piece of paper at Alice who watched it bounce to the floor, she raised her eyes meeting those of Ms. Baffle. Her lips were immediately curled into a smirk, that paper was the one she had written earlier guess she finally read it.

“You’re an arrogant little child who does nothing but try to bring chaos, you are selfish and a lost cause, your mother should have just...” Ms. Baffle stopped talking when Alice’s smirk couldn’t be wiped off.

She straighten herself before snapping her fingers, John and Fredrik appeared like lost dogs, they immediately grabbed Alice and carried her out of the room.

Her body was practically being dragged across the hallway floor, no not in a struggle of a lunatic fighting for freedom. Just like a worn out dead body unable to walk due to everything happening, Alice was carried to the correction room once again.

They threw her in the chair, the brown leather straps held her in place, from feet to arms to even head.

Once she was unable to move or run, like she would ever. Ms. Baffle entered the room like the devil she was, a wicked smile was on her face.

She walked like a lion to its prey, graceful and slow. She approached Alice, her fingers touching each inch of her exposed skin then she stood away. “You’re going to rot here child then burn in hell.” she whispered near her ear, Alice said nothing but watched the lever being pulled.

An instant wave of electricity passed through her body, no cry came and no word cause Alice knew she would soon leave BLI.