□Author Note:Written in First Person.

I can remember as clear as day. The rain was so cold. It had felt like ice-shards running down my pale face. The skies roared like a mighty lion to it's kingdom. Light flashing in a blink. My clothing soiled with dirt and rain and possibly a bit of snot. Why did I have a HEARTBEAT for that boy?! My heart was as broken as the thunderous sky. Those feelings I felt, the doki-doki that beat my heart, the sound of his voice that brought a sudden smile to my cherry lips. A disillusion created by my own false painting of this perfect human. Those cold words that sunk into my soul that day,

"Who would ever like a fat girl like you?!" Disgusting."

Surrounded by all his friends, my body went numb. Literally shaking, not from the cold, but from the embarrassment and sheer shatter of my feelings dropping pieces everywhere. The tears I shed hidden in the drops of water from the sky...as if nature knew what I had felt just then. A clash of thunder soon after, almost making my skin jump. This was my nightmare. And what hurts the most, I still love him. Was I such a masochist? Managing to hide the letter I spent weeks on writing, perfecting my penmanship, making sure each word I wrote meant something. But now...nothing.

Where do I pick up the pieces from here? A question this little girl did not understand.

After the storm had passed, clouds lightened up and some ray of sunshine beamed down on my broken down wet body. Was it my sign of hope? Maybe because after the rain had passed a hand was held out but from the shock of events..my body said it was time to shut down. Dead weight falling, closing my eyes, darkness taking over rapidly. It didn't hurt, surprisingly it was warm and inviting. Some how a safety net of comfort washed over my chilled body. Goodnight time.

●●●●●●●●●●●●

Soft fabric coaxed me as gently opening my eye lids. There I was in the school infirmary inside the elementary school. A little confused I was, remembering I was just outside a moment ago it seemed. Why and how was I put here? Looking over a older boy, had to be Junior High at least sitting in the chair resting. Did he rescue me? What was his purpose? Why me? I was a nobody .

A heater was placed beside keeping myself extra warm. A thoughtful gesture. Gently I smiled at the older one, a soft rosy color blushing my cheeks. Making me feel all warm...a good feeling? That I didn't know. I was Nine after all, what did I know? Chubby short me...thats what I knew most.

"Thank-you my hero...Thank-you." Speaking as I got off the bed myself. It was best to leave this scene as it was...a memory bitter-sweet like Chocolate. Maybe one day I can thank you properly, hero.

It was finally time, yes, that time! All of my hard work through the struggling years is now in full payment mode! I,Janielle, have created my self portrait! All that healthy eating, excise, and most of all self- discipline! A positive mind-set can achieve all. That and I transferred schools when that all went down, so this is new me, back were I will run into old classmates. Today my make-up is flawless, light and youthful, hair slightly curled pulled back into a half loose ponytail, and the piece of resistance...a fuchsia rose hair clip. It was strange, it was found in my desk the day after that event, before i transferred schools. Its been my lucky charm of sorts.

"Let's see, my book bag check. School uniform ironed and wrinkle free check...hmm..."

It had felt like I was most certainly missing an important item! Frantically searching everywhere my eyes catch the key item, ding ding, DUH ! My I.D. card for school! Can't enter without it! Gosh Janielle GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER! Taking a calming deep breath. Almost wanting to slap my cheeks upon my face but stopped myself to prevent a make-up malfunction.

Naturally heels were forbidden in the school system so what was a short girl like myself to do? Have to wear those darn plain janes again! So fashionable; NOT! I shall make do with what I am given, I suppose. Deep Breath in, feet in shoes, sweaty palms, check. Why was I nervous? Is it the chance to gain a new first impression on the ones that shattered my soul seven years ago? It should not matter to me, however; it does.

"Shake it off! Are you mouse or woman?!" A so called prep talk was in order! I shall not beat around the brush longer! Onward always...that should be my new inspirational phase.

Tap tap on my shoe, for luck. Reaching out my hand to open the off-white door blocking my view to the world. However, reality tends to bite us in the you know where department. What was promised was not displayed. Promise of a warm bless morning was comforted by gloomy greys, a chilly blue feeling, and the scent of rain drifting in the wind. "What the hell is this crap? " Clearly I decorated myself for a sunshine day not a glorified funeral! Grabbing a black jacket from the closet near by the door, and hoping it wouldn't drain my vibe. The uniform already was kind of...how you say...a bottle of wine? Chuckling at the though as my outfit was full of burgundy.

Deciding I didn't need an umbrella, I was off to the first day of the rest of my life...so far. Living close to this school allowed easy transportation, a good walking warm up for the day. Noticing other students with the same uniform was comforting, but, why did every single person have an umbrella, it wasn't even raining! Ignoring the signs, I decide to keep traveling along till I feel a few gentle tap tap tap on my head. Dear heaven, don't tell me?! Yep. Son of a gun! Using my book bag a potential shield as I push my legs as fast as possible to the nearest covered shelter.

"Is this some kind of cruel joke, because it isn't funny at all!" Not sure you I was yelling at, but it felt good to shout out! Reaching a small leverage hangover by a convenient store, should help as I wait for the rain to pass. Moments later what happens, I sneeze! Bless you me! Great, sniffling nose and my make-up is half ruined. Looking up to the sky, as it shouted back...jumping me a bit. I hate thunder!

Chill in the air, brought such a frighten stand on my arm hairs; goosebumps?! This brought back unwanted memories of the past that has chilled my soul for years. Such an imprint, left graveled in. Terrorizing every pulse my body has! Just like that day a roaring rumble that could shake any object, hurling down with power. The heavy droplets of rain playing a symphony only for my ears. A raphsody I didn't harmonize well with. Soon cracks revealing as rain sneaking in, causing my uniform to become damp and damper. Great I thought...Just want I needed. It had also felt as if the temperature fell short.

ACHU! Sniffles and a sneeze what a classic combo to have. Dam weatherman! Cursing under my breath, shivering. Arms crossed over, not helping really. Soon enough the down pour got worse. Just my luck, and with that a clash of thunder cracked the mighty sky with authority.

"Ahhh!..."

Jumping out of my own skin, I almost want to cry. Then a gleam of hope? An extended arm reaching out to me with shelter provided. Eyes like the deep ocean of earth, and ebony hair that seemed to shine. A male Looking to be older giving me shelter from the evils of the storm.

"Miss are you okay?"

A gentle voice touched me in a way that was a new experience. A soft expression on his pale pink lips, the empathy in his eyes. A warm glow to my cheeks painted them. Not sure if it was blushing or my temperature rising. Was I unable to speak? Speechless?! Get myself together!

"Hmm...Thank-you...."

Was that all that could come out of my mouth, really?! Janielle...at least say your name! Looking at him he might think I am crazy now because he is starting to chuckle. How embarrassing.

"You are welcome...Miss...but you look cold, let us go and get you dried off."

I blinked a few times not really understanding a word he spoke, feeling very hot I was. A dizzy spell took over me, I felt so weak. Eyelids so heavy, head pounding, slowly I was shutting down. Feeling as though my body was being caught by a warmth feeling. Looking up in a hazy vision...words being spoke but couldn't make them put."Janielle...Wake up!" Was my name being called..how could that be?!

Passed out, I could still make out sounds and the vibrating steps underneath. Who was carrying me?! Unable to wake...captured in a dream. Where was I? As if looking at my past self....days after that event. Holding that hair pin, a sweet smile so innocent...that note that said You are worth it. Become beautiful. That day, I never found who saved me, only this note and pi. remained when I woke up. Never found out the mystery. But those words that day gave me absolute courage and strength. Gave me a reason to live for tomorrow and smile for today.

What a sweet dream...