What to write? What to say? What to tell and what not? The world I lived in more like the bubble, is bursted. Destroyed. And now I'm at the edge of a cliff, whether I should jump or not. No enemies behind me. I'm my own enemy.

Hi! my name is Murphy Terrance. I'm a 25 year old woman who graduated from one of the best universities and I'm still currently jobless. Oh and the stuff you read above that's just me being overly dramatic when things don't go my way.

I had these hopes you know, that I'll get into the best university, graduate from there and when I'm done companies will be linning up to steal me. Alas! that's not what's happening.

I'm smart, hardworking and focused but when it comes to social interaction oh boy! I'm the biggest weirdo on the planet Earth. Meaning: I fail the interviews. Yeah you got it right I completely ruined another interview hence the dramatic intro. This was the sixth one you know. I mean I'm nothing if not persistent.

But let's get to the serious stuff. I NEED A FREAKING JOB OR I'LL BE HOMELESS. Kidding! Mummy and daddy are filthy rich so no I won't be homeless but I'll have to leave and live with my parents for the rest of my life. Which I absolutely don't want. You see mummy wants to marry me off and daddy wants me to handle the family business investment related and stuff. Honestly I'm not interested. I'm an Architect and I sure as hell will design something absolutely amazing just you see!

There is nother reason why I'm dreading going back to my parents. You see my father Geoffrey Terrance ( Geff for short) has three best friends: Nathan Black, Christopher Knight and William Maxwell. My father and his friends used to be Basketball legends in their highschool but none of them pursued basketball as a career. They were always together. Always there for eachother no matter what. They're brothers. I have to say they're also the coolest uncles ever! My mom Julia is also best friends with their wives, my aunts are amazing by the way, so we are like a big happy family living in Cobalt bay.

Their kids however are a different case. Well it's not really their fault that the universe loves them. They're successful, gorgeous and well honestly lucky because everthing always goes their way. Yeah yeah I envy them no need pointing that out. I mean why is life so unfair we all came from prominent backgrounds, all went to the best universities but now where I'm struggling they are already on their way to the top! oh don't you worry I'll introduce them to you later I'm sure YOU'LL LOVE THEM LIKE EVERY OTHER HUMAN BEING ON THE PLANET EARTH but rightnow I need to run, find a job and earn money or my landlady will throw me out for not paying the rent. Tootles!

Ok ok I know you're wondering why is the rich girl worried about rent? well you see I'm stupid. Really stupid. When I turned 24 I was confident that I can do anything and the world was in the palm of my hand muahahaha! So I started my internship at this architectural firm. It wasn't a glitzy glamour exclusive to only rich people kinda firm but I was still proud. I got in on my own without my father's help.

So you can imagine how happy I was! Woohooo go Murphyy!! and while drunk on my victory ( because I'm a lightweight so no drinking for me! thanks universe again) I thought it was a fantastic idea to call my dad and tell him what a grownup I was that I can take care of myself and I don't need any kind of monetary help whatsoever from him from now on, that I'm gonna build my own path, you know set an example for my little bro Henry, my dad agreed.

Turns out I was a complete idiot with a lot of pride. After I graduated and the internship ended I applied at multiple places like everybody else does to get a job but my communication skills weren't up to mark. You know me being weird and all. And I have to much pride to call my dad and ask for money. Oh that cunning old man knows what's happening he keeps an eye on his every child. what are they doing? what are they eating? where they go? what's happening with them? He knows everything. Pretty sure he predicted this was going to happen to me but hey anything that makes me go back home and help with the family business he'll do it.

So here I am sitting on my living room couch with my best friend Eva who's helping me prepare for my interview tomorrow. Eva is studying to become a lawyer. Her family lives in Norway and she came to America to study because she always wanted to live in New York and experience the life here.

" This is the last time I'm asking this freaking question murph! Give me an original answer this time. okay?" Eva said aggravated with me.

" But my original is not what people want to hear, love. My original is good for standup comedy not for a job interview." I replied munching on my chips.

" So not true. You just have a different way of expressing yourself. You know-"

" Different way of expressing myself? Are you referring to the fact that when asked a question I either give a one word answer or start babbling like a fool telling them my whole lifestory which they're not interested in?"

" That's the thing! you get confused. You just need to be confident and say what you want to say. You're amazing, creative and hardworking if you just show them that I'm sure you can do it."

"Hmph" is my very smart reply.

" I don't get it why do you get scared everytime?"

" I wasn't in the start you know that but being rejected so many times, I don't know it feels like something is wrong with me, maybe I'm just a dumb weirdo"

" For God's sake woman almost everyone experiences rejection one time or another doesn't mean they give up. I mean you get called for so many interviews, you have an impressive cv-"

" Or an impressive father ", I interrupt.

"- and you're smart the only thing is that you need to work on your confidence. Don't let the previous fails bring you down."

Easy for her to say. She got accepted in the fancy law firm on her first try and she totally deserve it. Eva was the kindest most loving person I've ever met. She's also the cleverest and most cunning person I know, You have to be if you want to be a lawyer. I love her. She was pretty much the reason why I was still trying. She gave excellent pep talk. I can guarantee that from the fact that she gives me one everyother day. I didn't want to disappoint her.

" Tell you what", she starts when I don't reply " We'll practice for this interview and by the time we are done you'll be so good you're going to blow away their minds.

I just sighed. I mean it wasn't like I had any other option.

" Okay but if I don't manage to " blow their minds", I'm changing my career to stripping and you're coming with me"

I blew away their minds.

Oh yes I did. Just not in the way I wanted to. The day started well. I woke up, had a healthy breakfast then showered and changed into my best and most professional clothes. I had white pantsuit on with a beige shirt inside , a delicate gold chain around my neck, some earrings on, with light natural make up and my brown hairs in a low pony tail I was ready to rock this interview. I grabbed my CV from the coffee table in the living room and made my way towards the door. I quickly slipped on my nude heels and checked the time once more to make sure I wasn't running late. As I was locking my apartment door my phone beeped alerting me that my uber was outside.

After entering my uber and saying a quick hello to the driver we were on our way to Sanat architectural firm. Sanat which literally means art in turkish and was owned by a turkish couple, no mystery there, was somewhere I've always wanted to work. I loved how all they're designs had a little touch of turkish culture in them, like they were leaving a sign behind that said " we did this ". I wanted to do this. Leave a sign behind on every piece of art I created letting the world know what I murphy can do.

Well now I can't do that because the interview was a complete horror. I made it a horror. I couldn't answer one question correctly, a complete blubbering mess. Come on murphy they didn't need to know how you bawled your eyes out when Miffin, the street cat I adopted, left me most probably because she was done with my obsession with cuddling. I don't even remember what question they asked to which I gave such an idiotic answer. Also what's wrong if I told them I'm a sensitive person.

I got scared.

When I'm trying to impress people and get scared I just start spouting embarrassing personal details like that's gonna impress them!!!

To their part, Mr and Mrs Murat, the owners where completely polite. Mrs Murat even laughed at my chocolate fountain story, another embarrassing story I shouldn't have told. But that's the thing! they were amazing and I wanted to impress them. Hence why my inner weirdo monster came out. They said they were impressed with my drawings, the portfolio I sent them before with a copy of my cv, and will contact me after they come to a decision.

The decision I'm pretty sure being: Thank God this insane woman lest our office! why did we even call her for an interview.

Rightnow I'm lying on the counch in Eva's appartment telling her what wonders I did in the interview. She's just staring at me not saying anything. I don't know what's going on inside her head. She's thinking something, planning something, hopefully not my murder for being an idiot, but that's how she is. She'll think of everything, every aspect, the pros and the cons. When she's done thinking she'll tell me what according to her is the best course of action.

" You should go back home ", she says after 10 minutes of silence.

" Why? " I whined. Though I kinda get why, she just came back from the law firm and today's a thursday that means no evening classes, she must've been looking forward to a relaxing evening. But here I am being great friend to her and spoiling her down time. So I stand up ready to leave because I have empathy for the tired soul that is my best friend and start collecting my phone, keys and wallet from the low table.

" Okay I'll leave you alone to relax today. But you're coming over to my place on sunday so that we can come up with a new game plan. Love yo- "

" That's not what I meant idiot", she says before grabbing my hand and making me sit down again, " what I was trying to say is you should go back to Cobalt bay "

I think my heart just broke. I can't do anything but stare at her. How much of a loser I must be to make the kindest most patient soul on the planet be aggravated with me. She wants me to go back, leave her alone so she can continue on her journey not being dragged down by my pathetic self every second.

I lost her.

" Okay. I get it. I won't bother you anymore. I know I'm not an easy person to be around but you've always been there for me, have been patient with me through all my failures and for that I thank you. You've got a heart of gold Eva", I say while she continues eating her ramen, " You were the bestest friend I could ever ask for, but I guess you're tired of me now just like how miffy got tired of me"

No reply from her. She continues enjoying her ramen.

" So I guess it's the end of journey together. Goodbye my friend ", I finish my heartfelt goodbye speech and stand up again to leave.

" If you're done being a drama queen sit back down ", she finally says while putting the bowl down.

" No I'm leaving. I've imposed on you enough. I still have some dignity ", I start walking towards door trying for a dramatic exist.

" Ohhhh for the love of GOD! shut up! I'm not giving up on our friendship or abandoning you or whatever stupid thoughts you're thinking in you're head ", she shouts and I turn right back around so quickly I'm disoriented for a second.

I haven't lost her yet. There is still hope Murphy. You just need to listen to every word she says and agree to it. That's it. Simple.

Wait a second... she wants me to go back to cobalt bay!! I don't wanna!!!!

" Can you just sit down and listen to me first, before turning into sad housewife whose husband is having an affair with the neighbor"

" Are you having an affair with your neighbor ?", I ask while I sit back down on the couch.

"No you moron"

It wasn't an illogical question. Eva is pretty openminded about the dating stuff. Pretty sure she broke up with boyfriend no. 3 of this month on monday, although to be fair only boyfriend no. 3 of the month thought they were dating while to Eva it was all casual.

World meet Eva the heartbreaker bestfriend of Murphy the looney who never had a boyfriend in her life.

" What I meant to say was ", she starts, " you should take a break. Go visit your parents. Hangout with your family. Just chill and relax for some time. Maybe if you'll stop stressing yourself so much and let loose for a while you'll get back in the game"

" But that place is not relaxing at all ", I whine.

" Well then ask your dad for some money and go to Bali or somewhere? "

" Not a freakin chance ", I snort. There's not a chance I'll ask dad for money and that to for a vacation in Bali.

I have dignity. Pride. Honor. I'm grown *** woman!!

" Well then your bank balance can only handle a trip to home ", she shrugs.

I deflate. I don't wanna go back but at the same time Eva is right I need to stop and breath for a moment. To many disappointments have been crushing me and I need to escape for a while. Think, plan and regroup. Also I miss my family they maybe annoying sometimes but they are a loving bunch I know if ever get in serious trouble they'll have my back. Come to think of it I haven't been home for 2 years now. I talk to them every sunday but that's not same as being with them. With that thought in mind I decide it's high time I go back and visit my family.

But let me try one thing first.

" Eva my love, my only one, my worl-"

" No Murph I won't come with you so don't even try "

" Buuutt Whyyyy??? Don't you want to experience how the rich live? Tell you what you know my dad's friends right? you've always drooled over them, I'll hook you up with one of them or all of them if you want ", I offer cheerfully. She won't say no. I know it.

" Firstly you hate them- "

"Hate is a strong word"

"-secondly you haven't talk to them in ages, pretty sure they won't even recognize you if you meet them right now- "

" Rude! I'm almost friends with them " I interrupt again. she ignores me again.

"- thirdly even though your offer is tempting, though you full filling is doubtful, I can't take even a day off. I have classes and then the internship at the firm. I'm swamped right now " she says sadly, " Otherwise you know I would've come with you even without the offer of a sexy hookup"

She's not lying. She would've come with me because she's one supporting friend. But I can't drag her along with me while she's trying to juggle her life as well. So with a heavy sigh I just nod and tell her I'll book my ticket right now and leave on the weekend.

" But why so early? when I suggested you go I didn't mean right fucking now! "

" Well I'm sure my landlady is throwing me out next week- "

" Oh that old bat is a hard *** "

"So might as well leave before she chases me out with her deadly frying pan " Not kidding thats what happened with Johnny my neighbor.

" Oh **** man. How about we abort the going away mission and instead you come and stay with me " she suggests with a hopeful smile.

" I do what stare at your walls ", I snort, " Dude you're not even here most of the time "

" So not true. I'm here full day on sundays"

" Yeah sleeping all day I know. Plus I think you were right I should go back home, hangout with the family. I miss them."

" Well what about me? What I'm gonna do without you? " she pouts. I smile at her. she will miss me alot. Other than her work and studies I'm the one she spends the most time with.

" I'll miss you so much you know even if you're trip is just for a week " she says quietly.

" I'll miss you too "

she tackles me into a bone crushing hug. But I don't mind and hug her back tightly.