I am special.

Yes! A very special someone with a very special case or so I think.

Oh, yes! Absolutely!

Well, probably? That's what I believe.

"Hello! I am Yana" smiles fakely, "Yana Brooks. It's very nice to meet you" I said as I gave another smile then laughs hard.

"What the hell? I feel crazy talking to the mirror introducing my self to myself. This looks weird! It's as if I somehow lose my mind!" snicker, laughs, and snorts.

"Oh my, what a lovely admirable look you have. Please smile brightly always and capture the hearts of women" grinning, saying it cheekily.

Ha. Women. Yes. Oh sure.

I don't know when I started to notice my being different in liking someone, but as far as I can remember, I wasn't really interested in boys too since I was a kid.

I do play with some little boys before but I always find them annoying and irritating - in some aspects. Meanwhile, my girl play mates are so lovely and sure is admirable in my eyes. I like them way better! Way better than my other gender play mates.

Anyways, I am pretty much attractive, setting aside my nice toned body but also with the looks due to my complex beauty - since my parents have different nationalities (dad's a British, and mum's half Spanish and Filipino) - that eventually makes people fascinated as I pass by.

Not that I am conscious about the usual stares and glances but, somehow, it makes me uneasy. Probably because despite how beautiful this face is, I never dolled up, not because I don't know how to but because I find it troublesome and I hate girly stuff!

Well, yea, that explains it.

I am an outstanding girl since I was little - maybe due to my exotic appearance where even strangers look at me closely and keeps saying, "How lovely! She sure looks like a doll!" or perhaps, "Ah! I wanna keep her. I bet she would really be pretty even more if we doll her up" and the like.

It's not that I hate to hear them say such things but I don't know. It never made me feel awesome, glad, nor happy.

I am into music - composing, also into literary and arts. I do these things whenever I feel sad and needs comfort. I do them even when I feel happy and joyful. Even when I'm on the urge of crying and breaking down, I do them.

Well that, in any case, I used to.

Mum always say how am I so obedient, so cheerful, very curious, and easily intrigued even as a child. But I never did talk rudely to others even my neighbors and especially towards my play mates.

As a kid, I am quiet most of the time and tends to observe people a lot but I do have some fun - supposedly. Not until someone ruined my sweet quiet childhood! Oh my lovely memories with Cassey and Nicole back then - remembering makes me feel blue so sudden.

An old acquaintance of my dad suddenly transferred due to his work and ended up living in the house across to ours.

I was glad back then before they arrived, knowing that from now on there will be somebody else living in the very block we live in, in this neighborhood.

Yes, I would really be happy because a new play mate is arriving.

I'm super thrilled expecting to see a new beautiful face and/or a lovely, charming girl coming and will be here every single day.

As what my parents told me, that family is nice and the kid they have is very beautiful! So I keep my hopes up but little did I know what I've been excited about will just crash the moment they'll arrive?

Gosh! My expectations back then sure shattered as that cheeky boy come out of the truck.

Yes, a boy. Well my parents did say beautiful so I assumed it will be a girl but I really have no comment.

I could still remember the disappointment I felt as I tried my hardest to smile yet that boy looked at me straight in the eye as he squint his eyes then nodded.

Stretching out after turning off the alarm? I really do have the feeling of being so refreshed.

"Today's another day but this day is different! Or so it seem" I yelled as I move faster than usual.

My Goodness! I'm having a date today after getting dumped two months ago. Haha! This is very impressive and kind of unexpected.

I was just out drinking alone as she approached me. Of course exchanging contact information went with the small chat she started.

After that night, we hang out a lot and eat together! And well, through out those conversations we had, that was the time she asked me out - after knowing I do swing the same way. Also, I am quite amazed by the fact of her making the first move.

I am pretty much worked up with excitement 'cause who would not? Its been a while since I last go out with someone so I am atleast nervous and I cannot stop shaking from this amusing feeling!

But so far, yea, the break up scenes keep repeating everytime I involve myself in relationships.

Whenever I get serious, I am the one being toyed at or being left. Haha! So perhaps this time, I'll leave some self-love too to avoid the extreme heart break again.

Well, am still hoping that this one - even for a short moment only - will last somehow.

*Ring. Ring. Ring.*

The phone buzzed as someone calls.

"Oh? She already called. Probably excited than I am" I mumbled before answering the call.

"Yea? You're on the way already? I'm leaving the house, too. See ya then!" I chuckled before ending the call.

She is beautiful, fun and above all kind. She loves to fool around but there is some uneasy feeling when I first met her. It's like something seems off but as I get to know her, all those doubts and negative impressions I had on her faded.

Her name's Nicole. She is a year older than I am yet she is way too short - not that I am describing her as tiny, but compared to me, she's 5 inches shorter.

I see it as an asset for her and do define her as someone cute nevertheless of her having noisy mouth and not filtering some words she says - not that I mind it personally.

I rode a cab to reach our meet up area and as I got there, I saw her. She is wearing a black off-the-shoulders short dress matching with her hair in a bun, and her cutesy black high-cut converse shoes.

I ran towards her and tapped her shoulder as I giggled, "Got ya! You're quite early ain't you?" then smiled.

She gave me a smile in return then we started moving.

"What do you think about this movie?" she asked me calmly.

"Up to you. It's either that or this one" I responded.

She snorted then said, "Fine. Fine. I get it. We'll go for this one then! Don't you blame me if this turns out ugly" as we both laughed our wits out.

Watching the movie seriously, I hold her hand.

Cupped my face with it as I plant small kisses around it - while my eyes glued to the movie screen.

"You really! Stop that" she whispered, "I cannot seem to focus on the show because of it."

"Oh? The movie's quite a bore, don't you think so too? Maybe for me it is" I said as I let her hand go.

I grabbed the soda and sipped it dry then munched onto the salted caramel flavoured popcorn I got for myself.

"Seriously" she rolled her eyes then sighed from disbelief.

What's wrong with that? I'm just trying to close the gap between us and tried to act sweet! But somehow this makes me feel uneasy... As if she's just toying with me.

Very well then, let's play along for now.

Decided to watch this boring movie alone since I've got no one to accompany me.

It's been so long since I last step foot here in this place, well, nothing really did change - some parts did but mostly remained the way it is.

I can still remember the last day I was here. I did bid my goodbyes to the people whom I got attached with already yet there's this one person before I left ticked me off.

As far as I can remember she even screamed to never show my face ever again and that I am disgusting. Hahaha! Remembering it makes me laugh, seriously that girl.

"Stop that", "Seriously!", some words I heard over the two person - probably fighting - watching this overly boring movie.

Ugh. How I wanna say to keep their voices down a little and that smooching sound-like smacks I do hear is a bit frustrating.

How can they be so insensitive about the broken hearted nor the singles out here? Tsk!

The lights from the movie is a bit brighter in this scene, and it reflected on those two persons having a fight.

I can't believe my eyes they're both women and the one who pouted looked so beautiful even with her hoodie on.

I just happen to saw a glimpse of her face when she turned sideways but I can already see the uniqueness of her beauty! God!

"This is too much for my poor eyes" I said out loud unconciously.

The woman wearing the hoodie turned her head to face me as she munch her popcorn.

"Wow. Can't believe someone find this movie interesting other than you, Nicole" she said before looking at her pair then let out a silent laugh.

I was left speechless and somehow ashamed. I am not referring to the movie but to her beauty that fascinated me - not that I want to make it clear though.

But to be honest, looking at her eye-to-eye made my heart flutter and gave me the impression I saw her somewhere.

No! Actually it is the feeling of I know her! But the question is, "who is she? where did we met?" or the like. Maybe because she's just my type or maybe because somehow, she just looks like someone I used to know.

Standing up as I grab my things and my garbages after deciding I will not finish watching the movie, I did have another full view of her face - but this time it's with the proper light from the movie screen as I walked down the stairs and taking glances at her face.

I took another look at her and it caught me off-guard. She was smiling looking at me, then I tripped over.

Goodness! It is very humiliating!

She snorted then laughed as the woman beside her crossed her brows and looked so pissed off.

I ran away from shame. Imagine a well-built man tripped over and nearly fell down! Who wouldn't laugh at that scene. I was trying to act cool even that moment, ugh!

As I was mumbling things to myself, I heard a voice. One that is super painful to hear. A voice that once gave the blending in the music in my ears, one that I get used to.

Which suddenly left without hints nor a single trace, that returned everything I hear to monotone.

"Gale?" the woman asked doubtedly.

I stopped and as I took a deep breath, she started asking again "You're Gale right? How you've been? Do you remember me?" as she hold my arm and smile.

I looked at her, and "Of course! I do know who you are! How dare you ask me that question after you've left me hanging?! How could you grab my arm as if nothing happen? And above all how could you ask me how I've been while you wrap your arms around your boyfriend in front of me!" that atleast I wanna say but I cannot bring myself to.

"You've got the wrong person. I'm sorry but I don't think I know you" I said in a cold voice as I shake her hand off.

"Oh. Is that so? I'm sorry then" she said flirtingly.

"If you'll excuse me."