I don't know why people bother about my size. I mean, why should it? My father, especially hates me being fat. Okay, for the record, I am not fat, fat. I'm kinda big. You know, like a walking cupboard. I am not round and cute and soft. With chubby cute cheeks. No, I'm like a giant. I have broad shoulders, unremarkable boobs, non-existent waist and a flat ass. I envy those hour-glass and pear-shaped plus size ladies. At least they look like women. Me, I look like a wide walking wadrobe. Like a man. No wonder I'm still single. That and the fact that i have zero sex appeal..

I remember when I was young, my father would comment on my eating and the amount of food that I was consuming. He would watch me like a hawk at the dining table. Just waiting to catch me when I take a second helping of anything. He even told me (seriously, I might add) that I should just stop eating altogether if I want to lose weight. Since I have a lot extra fat on me. True story. And whenever my mum called us for meals and I declined, he would be so pleased. Another thing that he likes to do is to relate me being fat with every problem he encounters. For example, when I didn't score so well in Maths, he would blame it on my eating habits. War in Bosnia? My fault, for being so fat.. It started raining, so he couldn't play golf? Yep, you guessed it, my fault for being soooo fat. Urgh. I hated him. And I still do.

The best thing that ever happened to me was when I went off to college. To be away from his critical comments and body-shaming statements is just so liberating. But I forgot that even with my father being so far away, there are people like him. And they are every where, always ready to pass judgement. And they are my every day hurdles. I just know I will never be free of them.

Damnit! It's already full. I lookedö around the jam-packed lecture hall, looking for Amy, my best friend.

"Hannah! Over here!" I heard a familiar shriek from the third row. I scanned the crowd and saw Amy, almost drowning, jumping up and down,trying to get my attention. I quickly went to her before she gets swallowed by the throng of students. She beamed when she saw me. I quickly sat beside her. Some students groaned.

"Hey, come on! No fair! You can't book a seat like that! We were here first!" A tall annoying looking guy whined. I looked up and saw a gorgeous guy looking at me in annoyance. Too bad he was sulking. Otherwise he'd be a guy I could be 'crunching' on. I flipped my hair and smiled apologetically.

'Sorry, better luck next time." I said flippantly and turned to Amy. Just then I heard him mutter under his breath "fat ass bitch." I turned towards him but he was already gone. Coward!

Just then, the class started. As I was busy trying to make sense of everything Professor Adams was lisping, I heard someone whispered my name rather urgently. I rolled my eyes. Here we go... I looked over my shoulder and Trey Jones was motioning at me. I sighed and mouthed the word okay. He wanted my notes again, as usual...He smiled and blew me a kiss. Yeah, yeah, I've had thousands of flying kisses blown at me, but I never had a real physical one. Sad, I know.

After class, as I was walking to my next one alone, Trey came and put his arm around my shoulder. It sent shivers down my spine, as per usual.. But being the cool, controlled woman of substance that I was, I kept it all hidden.

"Hey babe! Let's go to class together." Trey drawled as he smiled at me. I smiled and handed him the notes.

"Here, give it to me by tonight. I gotta study." Trey whooped and squeezed my shoulder before letting me go and stuffing my notes carefully in a binder. Once he stuffed my notes in his bag and it came out wrinkled to death. Suffice to say I let him have it so badly that he vowed to take care of my notes as carefully as his own life after that.

In my next class, I sat at my usual seat. Just as I sat down, there was a bustle and suddenly I was surrounded, right left front and back. I sighed and ignored the guys.

"Hey Hannah!" Dan and Ryan said in unison. Yes, they're twins. Blonde, tall, gorgeous as fuck pair of hunky twins...

The twins and Trey started talking and joking around. I sat there, playing with my phone. Suddenly, a sickly sweet smell surrounded me, threatening to suffocate me to death. I started gagging but I got hold of myself.

"Hey, Trey, baby," An annoying nasally voice came suddenly and pollute my eardrums. Athena Willis leaned over our desks and her boobs stopped right under my nose. Looking at the stiff, perky, overflowing Happy Mounds just activated my gag reflex. She ran a hand in Trey's hair and tugged him nearer to her and crushed her lips to Trey's and started chomping away. Eww ewww eww!

"Oh my God, please take this somewhere else, geez!" I cried, covering my eyes. Athena stopped kissing Trey and stood tall...well, as tall as she could in her 5 feet nothing stature.

"You're just jealous, bitch. I bet no guys ever kissed you. Since you're fat and all." Athena said with maliscious grin. Well, she got me there. I dismissed her words and just looked at her critically.

"Bitch, I ain't jealous of you at all. In fact, I feel so sorry for you. You have to dress and act all trampy to get the guys to notice you. Me, I just have to exist and look..I'm surrounded by them. They just cannot get enough of me, seriously..so, please get lost. Class is about to start and you're blocking the board." I gave her what she deserved. The kids laughed and booed. Athena flipped her hair, glared at me and stomped off, out of the class.

"Wow, snap, girl! You tell her!" Dan said in a sassy way. I looked at him funny. What the...

"Damn it, that was so funny. Athena is so creepy. She keeps kissing me randomly. And we only went out on a date once! And her mouth smells like smoke and fish, most if the time, urgh..Hannah, can I drink your water,' Trey said with a grimace. I handed him my water bottle and he took a huge swig and swirled the water in his mouth, for what seemed like hours. And then he swallowed. I looked in horror.

'Eewww...that was nasty! Trey!" I cried as Trey and Ryan high-fived. urgh, guys are gross.

You must be wondering why these guys are with me. You would never guess the real reason. It's because whoever does a project with me, will definitely get an A. I have an IQ of 121. And I help these guys study and get good grades. So, they gravitate towards me like moths to a flame. And they never see me as fat, ever. And believe me, being 5'5 and 190 pounds is definitely on the fat side. Eventhough they never see me as fat, they never see me as a woman either. They just see me as the genius who can tutor them. Which doesn't totally suck, but guarantees me a future of spinsterhood and keeping thousands of cats in my home.

I took out my binder and flipped through the latest assignment given by Prof Lawrence. It's a group assignment for 4 people. I looked at my watch. 5 more minutes. They'd better be on time or they're out.

I was sitting at the quad, waiting fir my group members to arrive. Suddenly I heard a sound that rivals a stampede of bisons running from a lion. I looked behind me and saw Trey, Ryan and a guy who looked familiar.

"Okay, 4 pm on the dot. We made it!" Ryan cried as he threw his books onto the table and threw his arms in the air. Trey and the other guy plopped in front of me as I looked at them sweating, in amusement. Well, I did tell them they'll get kicked out of the group if they're late. Ryan sighed and plopped into the seat beside me.

"Well, that was a close one. Alright guys, thanx a lot for being on time. Here, have some muffins. I got it fresh from Mrs Fields." I pushed the box and tbe boys pounced on them like a pack of wolves. Except the familiar guy. He just looked and seemed too shy to take one. I took one and offered it to him. He smiled awkwardly and took it.

"You look familiar...have we met?" I asked. He kinda looked like he was thinking, then he shrugged.

"Oh, I forgot. This is my new roommate Liam Henessy. Liam, this is Hannah Daly, our resident genius" Trey introduced us.

Liam smiled and raised his hand. I nodded my head and smiled. I couldn't shake the unmistakable feeling that I knew him from somewhere.

Then, just as he started to speak during our discussion, it hit me. The guy in the lecture hall earlier today. The one who said 'fat ass bitch'... I looked at him with narrowed eyes. He noticed it and looked confused.

"What?" He asked me. Trey and Ryan looked at me, too.

"What's going on?" Trey asked. Ryan shrugged his shoulders.

"So, fat ass bitch, huh? Classy, real classy.." I saud icily. I saw his face changed and he had the grace to look shamefaced.

"Look, I'm really, really sorry. I didn't mean to say that. I was tired and was having a really bad day and it just slipped out. Believe me, I felt horrible after that and wished I could take it back. I seriously wished you'd forgive me. I'm normally a nice guy..." Liam grovelled and begged. He looked nervous and well, scared I guess.

"Err, did we miss something..??" Trey asked, looking at us.

I was quiet and stared at Liam. He seemed to shrink abd looked like he wished a truck would just hit him already. I sighed and just smiled.

"Nah, it's nothing important. Come on, let's get this done!" I said, ignoring Liam's pleading face and decided to just forget about it.

The afternoon went very fast. Pretty soon it was almost 8 p.m. Ryan put his pen on thr table and stretched his body noisily.

"Argh, damn that was so hard! Let's eat. I'm starving." Ryan said as he started packing up.

"Yeah, let's eat." Trey said. We packed up and walked towards Trey's beat up old Hyundai.

"Shotgun!" Ryan cried and ran towards the front seat of the car.

Damnit, that meant I had to sit at the back with the idiot Liam.