Petals Over Thorns
Unknowns thoughts
Well, have you ever felt that you don't belong anywhere ?...because I did, and the thing is I can't do anything about it,
I can say I'm fine, easily just like that in the blink of an eye .... I can pretend everything is fine ....act like it never happened ....make it look like it never mattered ....make it sound like they were always right, and I was always wrong....make it look like ....I was never needed there....make it look like they're better off without me,
I can ....all the time ...every single fucking time...I can obviously
Who doesn't make others worried about me
Who can take care of themselves
Who can take care of the house works and others
Who can be ok even left alone all the damn time
Not when I was so damn hurt that I felt like dying
Not when I cried for hours and hours in the daytime in my room all alone
With no one to call for when I needed...
I was there ...always for others...
But I never really say anything to them when I wanted
They said I could go to them when I'm hurt... Of course, they are good people ...but I never felt like telling them
Because it's useless to tell them about my problems ..., they can't, do anything about it, and exactly because I know they can't I don't tell them and you know It's just like adding my problems to their when they already have a lot on their plate
It makes you throw up when you keep eating over your limit, it hurts, in the end they leave you
So yeah ... I don't tell them either
But you know .... I wish I had someone to tell me it's alright ...it's ok to be like this...everything will be ok, even if it wasn't ...
I wanted some warm hands to wrap me in their arms, a shoulder to cry on or lean on I guess.
I haven't felt that in a long time, well I can't blame anyone either...cause you know I am the one who is keeping them away plus I hate physical touches
Funny thing right exactly when I said I wanted to be held in warm arms... to be embraced
Well it is what it is I guess
unknown
Oh yeah , sorry folks you have to read my depressing thoughts when you could do a lot of better things, sorry for wasting your time, but thanks for reading it
Introduction
You know they sometimes say you have to pretend like you don't know what's going on?
Well that's what I do all the time
I pretend like I don't know why I am like this or why I don't talk much
But am I pretending, I don't know to be honest
Cause whenever I smile nowadays it feels fake like I am happy one second then my mind goes like am I really happy?
Or you can phrase it like this, I am doing something quite enjoyable along with the others, but in the end I'll be like why should I do this or what's the need in doing this
Funny right ?, because I was the one who was enjoying it and doing it, no one forced me to but in the end it felt useless
unknown
Never mind, it feels like I'll waste your time talking depressing things
unknown
Oh by the way I didn't say my name did I? How silly of me
Alvin
A depressed teenager, well there are a lot of depressed ones I guess
Alvin
I am no star or actor or come from a rich ass family
Alvin
Just from a normal middle class house
Alvin
I have a mother and brother
Alvin
Well about my father ...you'll know it when you read it later if you want to
Alvin
I like the color black or that dark blood-red, it's beautiful.
Alvin
I like my mother and brother too
Alvin
But yeah, I guess It's boring to read about some random side character in a story, well I'm sorry about it, I can't be the perfect male lead you guys imagined being, I am just me, and sorry for that
Alvin
Oh, are you asking if i am studying ?
Alvin
Nah, I just finished my last year of high school
Alvin
currently just a freeloader, who just eats, sleeps, sometimes helps at house works or cooks I guess, basically you can say I'm a burden
Alvin
Why am I talking like this? Well my mom, she is a single mom, who works at both places
Alvin
For both of us, oh by the way I'm the youngest here
Alvin
My older brother ...he- he is cool, a good-looking reliable one I guess you can say that
Alvin
Well we are close but not that close?
Alvin
I guess I'm being boring again huh?
Alvin
Well I hear it a lot
Alvin
All my friends say that, can't blame them cause I never speak much, even if I do, it's just all boring stuffs
Alvin
I am being all depressed again, sorry guys, I'll talk of something else
Alvin
Oh, you wanna know about my childhood times?
Alvin
It's not that great but sure , if it makes you entertained
Alvin
Hmmmm so where should I start from ...hmmm how about from the very start , like before I was even born ?
Alvin
I heard some entertaining things my mom told me
Alvin
So Let's rewind a bit yeah?
Download NovelToon APP on App Store and Google Play
