I feel the viscous blood between my fingers as I hold my throat. She’s on the floor, naked and bloodied after the fifteen stab wounds I gave her in her heart. Suddenly her eyes open and stare at me with the smile I learned to hate after loving.

I wake up sweating profusely; it's just another of my recurring nightmares from when I killed my stepmother, who abused me when my father traveled for work. I was fourteen when it all began; my father married a young woman of twenty-two.

Who wouldn't want to marry the king of engines, a billionaire who, despite his age, looked younger? He attracted the attention of a woman who had her own plans.

When she met me, she gave a huge smile. I was already quite tall; I took after my father in genetics. But even though I was tall, I was only fourteen. She married my father six months after my fourteenth birthday.

Who would have guessed she was a sexual predator? Anyway, on my sixteenth birthday, I got tired of it all. She would burn me with a curling iron on my arms, my butt, and wherever else she wanted. She would put me on all fours and whip me with a belt, tie up my balls and squeeze them, among other tortures besides sex.

My father had traveled with the promise to return and celebrate my birthday with me. But I was already tired of the physical and psychological tortures; I was tired of being used and abused by her, so I kept a knife under my pillow.

She entered my room naked, as always. She came at me, and that's when I pulled the knife. I hit her three times until the knife slipped, and she grabbed it, slashing my throat. I thought my life would end there. We got into another struggle. When I managed to get the knife, I didn't blink. I sat on top of her, and it was liberating.

Each stab for each torture, each abuse, it was perfect. But I was losing blood; the cut seemed deep. I just lay down beside her and closed my eyes.

When I woke up, I witnessed a nasty fight between my parents. My wrist is handcuffed to the bed, and I try to call out to them.

"It's your fault, Ryan. I shouldn't have left my son with you; you made me believe it would be better for him, and look what happened."

"Safira, I already told you I don't know what happened. I don't know what led him to kill Leticia. Let's wait for him to wake up."

"Seriously, Ryan? She was naked in our son's room; that bitch was abusing him under your roof. And those marks on him, will there be an explanation for those too? Or was it you who did that to him?"

"Mom, my father never laid a finger on me," I say with great difficulty.

"Dom, my son, what did that bitch do to you? Why did you kill her?"

"Safira, he's already strained himself too much; leave the questions for tomorrow."

"Don't talk to me, Ryan. My son is going to my house when he gets out of here."

"I'm his legal guardian, and don't forget that unfortunately, he still has to answer for the crime."

"We are responsible for him; I only unfortunately allowed him to live with you. But I'll sort this out soon."

No… I don't want to live with my mother; I like my father. I thought at that moment, little did I know I would spend the next three years of my life in a psychiatric clinic. A court decision after a psychiatrist, bribed by my father, stated that I had a psychotic break after so much time of physical, sexual, and mental abuse.

When I left the clinic, I went straight to my father's house. There was another nasty fight between him and my mother. She didn't want to allow me to continue with him, but I was already nineteen, and she couldn't decide anything for me.

Five years later, I lost my mother in a plane crash. My father had already placed me beside him in the company and taught me everything I needed to know about the production of various engines that were sold worldwide. When I turned twenty-five, I took control of everything.

My father discovered prostate cancer too late, and I stayed by his side until his last breath. Both he and my mother left me a huge inheritance.

My professional life was always perfect, but my social life wasn't so good. My cousins and best friends, the twins Jack and Jason, are always trying to get me out of my comfort zone to meet women.

The problem with meeting women is being touched by them. Every time it happens, I feel the pain of torture burning my body. I can't do anything; I always leave them with ten thousand in their pocket in a hotel room.

Present day…

"We have a party to go to tonight, and you're coming with us," Jack says, loosening his tie knot as he sits on the sofa in my office.

"I've already told you I don't like going out, I don't like people, I don't like society. Did you forget what happened the last time you made me go out?"

"Why did you kill that guy? He just bumped into you and spilled a drink on your pants; you didn't have to beat him to death."

"You know he wasn't the only one, nor the first. I'm not sociable, and I shouldn't frequent environments with such irritating beings."

"Jack, have you told him yet?" Jason enters, also loosening his tie knot.

"Yes, Jason, but I think we'll have to call Diogenes. I believe our cousin is going to kill someone else tonight."

"I'll only kill if you insist on my presence at this stupid party," I say without taking my eyes off my computer screen.

"Jack, did you tell him it's a party dedicated to Dark Romance and that we'll be evil characters who will scare and seduce women?" I stop typing and look at Jason. "We can wear masks, we have to dress in black and be the terror and desire of some women."

"Wear masks?" I ask, a finger on my chin.

If I kill someone tonight, I won't need Diogenes to clean up my mess, as usual. After my father's death, I ended up meeting a mobster named Diogenes Maltes and forming a partnership with him in the underworld.

"If you insist so much, I'll go, but I won't be responsible for what happens after the mask is on my face."

I give them a cold smile and then turn my attention back to my computer. What does tonight have in store for me?

Love is beautiful, but I don't want to feel this shit for anyone else. The next time I feel butterflies in my stomach, I'll drink water and drown them. It hurts me inside to be cold, but I do it to protect myself, knowing I have the most loving and gentle soul in the world. I should have stuck with that thought and not gotten into another relationship.

My life as a teenager and child was perfect. I was raised by my grandparents while my parents went to work to give a comfortable life to me and my two brothers, William and Taylor. William is the oldest, Taylor the middle child, and I'm the youngest. There are three years between each of us.

My brothers are wonderful, protective, and they beat up my second-to-last boyfriend so badly he ended up in the hospital after they caught him cheating on me. But today I discovered I wasn't born for relationships.

I left work early; I spend my day at a call center transferring calls to specific departments. But luckily for me, there was a server outage and everyone was let off early.

So I thought: I'll pay Erick a visit, he must be missing me since we didn't sleep together over the weekend because I had my period. I'm in the elevator and when I get out on Erick's floor, I pass by a lady who is normally very friendly, but this time she looks at me strangely and lowers her head.

I keep walking with a smile on my face until I start hearing screams and moans—wow, someone in one of these apartments is having the best sex of their life. I keep walking, until I stop in front of Erick's apartment and the sound gets louder.

I look at the door of the apartment across the hall and I swear if those screams and moans aren't coming from there, I'm going to freak out. I look at the numbered keypad and type in the code to open the door. As soon as it unlocks, I open it and follow the small hallway that leads to the living room.

There are clothes on the floor, shoes, and a mess in the living room, but what catches my attention is the naked couple on the couch. The woman has her face pressed against the sofa upholstery while her ass is all the way up, being fucked by my boyfriend who hasn't noticed my presence.

I hadn't recognized the woman whose hair was covering her face until she moved it to breathe, and I can hardly believe who it is.

"Agatha, thank you, you really did keep an eye on Erick for me. But did you have to use your body too?"

I ask, and Erick looks at me, startled, moving away from her, making me feel disgusted by him with his dirty dick. I guess he wasn't expecting this to happen.

"Sam, it's not what you're thinking, I…"

"And what am I thinking, Erick?"

"Sam, it was just this once, I swear to you! I didn't want to, but she took off her clothes and started groping me, and before I knew it, she was sucking me off. Honey, forgive me, please."

"Erick, we've been sleeping together for three months, I came to tell you I'm pregnant, and you tell her it was only today?"

"You what?" we asked together.

"You know what, unhappiness to the new couple. May you be unhappy forever."

When I turn to leave, I feel a hand grip my arm firmly and pull me, throwing my body against the wall. Erick kneels after that and holds my legs, preventing me from walking.

"Sam, please, I messed up with you, but I don't want to break up. She's lying, there's no way she's pregnant, we used condoms."

"Really? Then why is your dick dirty with shit?"

He looks at his dick and then at Agatha, who is sitting with her legs crossed, waving a drugstore pregnancy test in her hand.

"Are you going to keep denying my pregnancy, Erick? We never used anything because you always say I'm hotter and tighter than her."

I hit him in the face with my knee and ran off. Even in pain, he keeps shouting my name. I see him crawling out of the apartment, still naked, with blood on his face, yelling my name. I press the elevator button several times until the door closes.

After I get into the car I called through the app, I feel the weight of everything that happened. Erick starts calling me and bombarding me with messages, and I block him. I go into my friends' group chat and leave without saying anything, then I block Agatha too.

Soon I get messages from the girls wanting to know why I left the group, and when I tell them, I'm added back, and they tell me Agatha was removed.

"“Girls, please, I need a drink, who's in?”"

They all say okay, and I arrange to meet them at our usual bar. I change the Uber's route, and it heads to the bar. When I get there, Nala immediately hugs me.

"I always told you guys I didn't like Agatha," she says.

"Alright, Nala. Next time we'll listen to you and won't add anyone else to our group," Aysra says.

"But why did that bitch do this to you?" Mariah asks.

"It was my fault… She offered to keep an eye on him for me because she lives in the same building, and the fool here agreed."

"Enough, let's not talk about this anymore. How about a Dark Romance party to unwind?" Nala asks excitedly.

"We're in," the girls say together.

"I don't know, I think I'd rather drink and go home."

"Sam, you're not going to stay home suffering when there are hot, possessive men waiting for us at a party that promises to be good."

Nala doesn't give up; she takes me to her place while the others go to theirs. She dresses me up like a doll: red lipstick, eyeliner, a black V-neck dress, a black leather jacket, and black ankle boots too. A very Dark look.

In the end, we found out only the two of us would be going; the others had to change their plans at the last minute. What does tonight have in store for me?

After work, I went straight home. Normally, I don't care about anything after I get home and pour myself a drink. Except today, something is different. There's a little demon on my shoulder whispering that something is waiting for me out there tonight.

I go to my closet and look for something special. If anyone walked into my closet right now, they'd think I was in eternal mourning because I only have clothes, shoes, and accessories in black. But it's just my taste in color, nothing special about it.

I walk through my closet looking for something perfect, until my eyes land on my black combat boots that I haven't worn in a while. I grab them and set them aside. Then I find a pair of black jeans with some rips down the legs and grab them. And from a box on top of the wardrobe, I get a black skull mask that covers from my nose down.

I got this mask from my dad when I turned thirteen to go to a Halloween party, and now I'm going to use it again. I take a relaxing bath and return to the closet twenty minutes later. I grab a pair of socks and put them on my feet, put on black boxers, then the jeans, and finally the combat boots.

I look at myself in the mirror and put black eyeliner around each eye. I admire myself for a while and feel like something is missing from my look. I observe for a bit longer, decided to put on some body oil for a sweaty effect, until I look at my hands.

I figured out what's missing from my look. I need to cover my fingerprints, I need a pair of gloves. I go to my glove drawer and grab a pair of black leather gloves. Now, spiked hair, perfect look.

"Dom? Are you ready yet?" Jason bursts into my room shouting.

"If you're not ready, we're taking you as you are," Jack threatens.

I come out of my closet and they're both sprawled on my bed. They know how much it irritates me, and they keep doing it.

"Another set of bed linens that will be burned. Thanks, cousins."

"Are you kidding me?" Jason asks, getting up as he looks me up and down.

"Something wrong?" I ask.

"Of course! You're drawing more attention than both of us, that's not fair!" Jack complains.

"It's simple, take off your shirts like I did, and then we'll go."

"Just a minute… Now you're asking to go?" Jack analyzes me. "Jason, they abducted our cousin and put an alien in his place."

"I think we'd better see if he's not carrying a weapon, I'm suspicious."

"If you search me, you'll find a pair of handcuffs and three pocketknives."

They look at me and start laughing. I don't care if they don't believe me. Actually, it doesn't really matter. I want to explore this night that seems so attractive to me.

We head out. They came on motorcycles, but I opted for my car. I follow them as they play on the road with their bikes. Half an hour later, I see lights coming from an alley, and they enter it. Further ahead, there's a garage, and I park my car there, then go back and enter the alley where they're waiting for me.

"Does this alley have an exit?"

"A corridor up ahead, where the party is!" Jason answers.

Indeed, the alley is lit with an annoying show of colored lights. When we reach the end of the alley, on the right side, there's a corridor that leads to a huge open space. There are people everywhere, some dressed in something similar to what we're wearing, and others, mostly women, dressed in clothes that make them look pure and innocent.

They want to look like easy prey for predators in this dark world, but to me, it looks very forced, they all look like Bella from the Twilight saga. Some even imitate her gestures, it's so mediocre and boring.

"Full of hotties, drinks, and themed music. Anyone want to pick up a hottie for tonight?" Jack asks, rubbing his hands.

We start walking through the party. I found a baseball bat, liked the object, and started dragging it around until some imbecile bumped into me and called me an idiot. I think he needs a doctor now.

My cousins took the bat from my hand and threw it into a barrel that was on fire. The unconscious man was left behind a huge dumpster, and they quickly dragged me away from there to the other side of the party, and that's when my eyes landed on a woman who was nothing like the others here.

She looks at me for a second and then looks away. Jacket, dress, stockings, boots, my favorite color dominates her body and accessories. Her beautiful hair brings a special charm to her face, her mouth with red lipstick makes me want to kiss her.

"Dom? Are you okay? You look like you're hyperventilating. Calm down, cousin." Jack puts his hand on my shoulder, and I remove it.

"Continue your night from here, I've already found what brought me here."

"What do you mean? Where are you going?" Jason asks, and I ask back:

"Jason, you like redheads, don't you?"

"Sure, you know I do! Why do you ask?"

"Just look, and you'll understand!"

I calmly walk towards the woman, but as I get closer, I notice her short stature. Looking from here, she must be five foot three, and that only makes me more attracted. I stop in front of her, she looks up at me and says to her friend:

"There you go, Nala, there's a giant, intimidating, muscle-bound guy with a psycho face, just like you wanted. You can enjoy your night, I'm going to get a drink, you know where to find me."

She tries to take a step to the side, and I follow her pace. She looks up once more. I look at Jason and nod towards the redhead, and he immediately understands. The woman in front of me starts talking:

"Look, I know I'm here, but I'm just company for my friend. She's acting, I'm not. So go have fun with her."

The woman takes another step to the side, wanting to go towards the bar, and I follow her movement. As soon as Jason picks up the redhead and walks away with her, I do the same with the brunette in front of me. But the direction I'm going is the parking lot.

"What do you think you're doing?" She hits my chest and my shoulder. "Let me go, put me down now. Help… Help."

She screams, but the women around us envy her and say things like: "Help? Your night is made." But right now, I can only focus on my body, which didn't reject the touch of her skin.

I don't feel my scars, which are covered by tattoos, burning. I always feel that when other women touch me, I feel them burn as if they were still raw flesh.

But with this woman, that's not happening. I was already mentally preparing for the pain, but so far, the only thing I feel in my body is a heat mixed with a lust consuming my body and soul.

Arriving at my car, I put her on the ground and handcuff her wrists. She looks at me, irritated, and struggles to get out of my grip until she insists:

"Look, big guy, I'm going to say it one more time, and this time very slowly: I'm not acting, I'm not participating in this madness, I'm not dressed like the women in there. Let me go, and I promise I won't report you to the police for touching me without my permission."

"You're not acting?" I ask, pretending to care. "Neither am I."

I speak seriously, giving her my worst look, and her eyes widen in shock. I push her into my car and close the door. She kicks the door and tries to open it, but she can't because I locked the doors. I distract her with myself for a second until I get into the car and lock the doors again.

"What do you think you're doing? Let me go, I won't tell anyone about what's happening here."

"Neither will I," I say, leaning towards her side and grabbing a spray I have in the glove compartment.

"What are you going to…"

I spray the contents of the bottle in her face twice, and she passes out instantly from inhaling too much of the sedative.

"Brunette, you've become my biggest curiosity at the moment. Shall we play?"

I let out a loud laugh, knowing she can't answer. I head to my apartment, which is nearby, a hidden place I call paradise.