I liked a girl meet on sports day.I touched her hair felt in love. I saw a red bottle and she was red house girl of class these are confirmed I asked that day about her to avinash girlfriend she told me it's someone named siliya i searched siliya's account through insta in avinash phone by login my insta.i got her I'd in first try.I sent her the request she accepted it .Avinash girlfriend told me siliya was a nice girl but she was muslim and there was a chance to her been engaged this was rumour in our school.but I still want to talk to siliya as I kinda liked that girl.She replied my dm and we chat she was a nice girl to meet with we talked and I want to meet her so she said meeting in the school assembly arena was perfect we started to meet regularly in assembly arena and canteen and btw the first time I tried to meet her it was after the choclate day during valentine week I have a choclate for her and few money around 3k to spend but while I was in corridor few female teacher in group caught me siliya saw me greeted from afar and i made the eyes for her to go and she left the teacher searched me got the chocolate and money they seize it and ask me to bring my parents my mother knew about the money and I shifted the blame of choclate on random Friend to convince my mother i tried to handle this concern on myself and my mother talk to teacher on phone to prove my teacher that my mother knows about this money but even after talking to her he told it's not safe to give to a child of the 3 k my mother came the next day and the matter was resolved easily later on I chat with siliya on daily basis but idk that she had a bf his bf found out about me and talked with me in insta at rage and i replied at more rage we fought then siliya blocked me, didn't understood why I asked her next day then she told his bf was bad person and always argue I was on with being block we met each other at break later on I started to notice that she started to smile less while seeing me and i later asked about it one day and she said I was just over thinking but just after break a teacher called me asked me what I was doing, i didn't understand what he was asking about but later he gave me hints that it was about siliya and she has complaint I was stalking her the teacher told me the worst case about it this was leaked to society then I would have been culprit but he acknowledged that" you like her which isn't bad so don't disturb her " and he told me that she was crying about this infront vice principal I was really sad .THERE WAS ANOTHER STORY GOING BESIDE THIS.i was in a relationship with other girl too named Anshu she wasn't my type but she asked me out and during that time I was emotionally forced by people around me to see them in relationship so I accepted the relationship was going on while I was talking to siliya and I broke up with anshu by making myself look bad that I didn't deserve her .these things happened while I was talking to siliya.later after siliya's complaint I didn't meet her.I started going aakash institute i liked a girl i gave her choclate she rejected it but a random day her scooty got stuck at roadside i helped her to take that out .But still no chance so I gave up .She was a good look one it's ain't a lie .That's how my class 11 end Starting of 12 our batch got shuffled in aakash I met a new girl i tried to find about her but she left aakash and joined other tution but i got her insta we talked and I asked her out she agreed for a date I waited outside her tution she came and it was going well until few of my old friends saw me asked me to buy cigarettes for them i treated it but later they asked me about girl who she was I said don't do anything to her but when I saw the girl again she was gone i tried to find about her. she told me she was been flirt with my friends and if I can't protect her then she won't need me i made those boy say sorry to her and she later on accepted it she agreed to go out again and it ended well but after few dates she told I was not her type i accepted that and left her (I still have the guilt because first time anybody said to me"WHEN YOU CANT PROTECT YOUR FRIEND HOW WOULD YOU PRITECT YOUR GIRL")i learnt I was never meant to be loved so I stopped interaction with girl later on when it was half my time in class 12 siliya returned she tried to make me see her i ignored her .She added me as friend in snap i accepted that but still ignored her in school but she always try to make her see herself and our class games period were same so I practically can't ignore her i replied to her message on snapchat we again started to talk she told me she didn't complain about me it was her friend Sush who complained and I agreed we started talking again I thought she returned to me we meet again I gave her gifts she accepted it one day i asked her out as couple she told me she see me as friend so I prestered her many days than she told me if she tells the truth i would hate her she told me she fall again with someone while she was again talking to me and been in relationship he was nice guy (he cheated on her girlfriend to be with siliya)she liked her he had a great looks and oneday they both french kissed each other and the boy was shirtless while doing it and she scratched his back (And btw I was getting the snaps of boy while talking to her on insta i asked her who the boy was she told cousins and i believed her) I still asked her to be with me I accept her but she still plays hard to get and show she has values (I am a virgin even in kissing and I am liking a girl who is muslim plus has kissed intimately with other boy meanwhile talkin to me and even lieing him as her cousin)She act like my girlfriend and treat me like her boyfriend always give me order that I shall have only her in my life and no other girl or else she would be jealous and ignore me (act like girl)but I cant be jealous of her having male friends because I am just her friend she says. I tried to move her appartment from my life but I am attached to her and she crys to her friend that she doesn't deserve anything and her friend message me that she is crying and my cool to leave her breakdown and I talk to her again.Btw she told me after breaking up with the boy who used her physically she thought to be a bad person too and thought of playing with me so I too said I was planning the same but i fell for her again one fight i told her i would stop saying princess to her but she said no she liked hearing that from me but I said princess was romantic term for me not telling to every other girl but i later on I started to say it again as that made her happy to listen.I KNOW SHE IS MANIPULATING ME AND IS JUST USING ME FOR FUN AND I AM NOT EVEN SAINT MYSELF BUT I HAVE BEEN BULLIED FROM CHILDHOOD FOR MY LOOKS SO I KNOW I AM NOT GOOD LOOKING BUT IT ISN'T POSSIBLE THAT I DON'T DESERVE LOVE PEOPLE MORE BAD THAN ME HAVE LOVE LIFE WHY CAN'T I??AM I THAT HARD TO BE LOVED.i told this too that even if she is manipulating me or playing with me or is a gold digger I still like her i literally beg her everyday to love me back because I friking adore her . Whole school knows that siliya has been physical with that boy and it was just a month relationship with him and the boy is now back to his ex girlfriend again and that boy disturb her every week with new issue and i told siliya i would help her then she stops me and give me teaching about to be mature wtf if she was mature to begin with this won't even happen I still like her and I can't be jealous of these events of she act like my woman and boss me arround and still I can't be jealous???Wth is this this boy came been with her has been intimate left her all that happen in between I was talking to her???

I would write about my life more nicely every day in series and keep on uploading it in sequel This novel was written on whim but i would write more as it was relaxing.continue reading it