You here, my friend, back again! Are you staying for real this time because I am tired of retelling this story over and over every time. Back when I was 8, my mom used to talk to me, tell me stuff but one day she just stopped. She would just sit by the window looking out at the people as they walked. Most times she would cry and I didn't know why. She also didn't eat on times so I used to bring her food that I had cooked but she wouldn't eat it. What should I do? She wouldn't even look at me. Did I do something wrong? Of course I did, what else can it be. All those we my passing thoughts. She would sometimes come to dinner as my dad complained about his boss, family and coworkers. I never understood why because she never ate or talked to him at all. She would just sit there and stare. One day I came home from school and wanted to tell my mom about my day but she wasn't in her usual places she would go at all. Soon I found her in the bathroom and her eyes was closed. She was in the bathtub, the water was red for some reason and the water was pouring over the bathtub and unto the floor. I tried to wake her up but she didnt. That was when I remember what my mom told me in case of any emergency situation so that's what i did. I went to my mom's and dad's bedroom and picked up the phone and dialed the emergency services. She went to the hospital and my dad came soon after. My mom was gone. I knew what that meant I wondered if I caused it. My father said I did and I always just believed him. After living with my dad a while I got used to his complaining. It was a routine some may say after hearing how often. One day after school, my dad came home wobbling, from side to side, he looked sad as he knelt next to me and cried. I tried to comfort him with a hug and he touch my shoulder. His touch lasted longer than I was comfortable with but I guess that didn't matter. He touch my head, my kneck, my legs. I didn't know why. That's the most that I remember from that night. The next day I woke up and felt weird, like I wasn't in my body but was still there. Like I was not the one in control. The next day, and the day after that and that, my dad would hit me. It hurts so bad but I didn't cry. My dad would get very angry when he saw that I didn't. He get a belt, a pot's spoon or his hand and his would hit me with it.

Before I knew it I was fourteen as the years just flew by. My dad would still hit me and I didn't know why. But i knew it was my fault, i told you didn't I?

Anyway, I had just started high school and made new friends. Well technically it's the other was around but it doesn't matter here. That's how I met you and Tina. Tina never seemed to see you which was weird but when I tried to get why, my head would hurt. You knew about what happened to my mom and dad and though I tried so hard, i couldn't tell Tina even though you said that I should. It didn't matter anyway as she saw the bruises, that i hid under my sleeves and baggy pants. The next day after school, I was held back by my teacher, Mr..... he told me I was pretty and stroked my leg. Suddenly I had the feeling again. Me, like i wasn't in control of my body and instead you were there. Suddenly the door opened and Mr. Pyer entered the room. He saw what was happening and called me to his classroom.

He asked if I was ok.

I said," why wouldn't I be?" Wasn't it a normal thing people do to children?

He then looked at my arms and that is when I realized that my sleeves were up.I didn't know how or why.

How did you get that he questioned

I didn't answer. I avoided his eyes. For some reason I felt like he was looking at me disgusted.

He didn't insist I tell him instead he only said this," If you dont feel safe or wanna talk about anything, I'm always here. A few days past and my dad becomes more violent. One day he forced me unto the bed. For the first time I was genuinely scared. Normally you take my place, while I just watched but just like my mom you weren't here. He pushed my head into the mattress and took of his pants off. He rubbed his body against mine. I tried to push him off but I dont have a very strong build. I don't want to say the rest because I don't like telling the story. I already feel sick. I liked being at school. Nobody yells at me or hits me.

After a few hours, I returned to my bedroom, feeling weirdly numb. I looked up at the bed and you were there. You seemed worried. I asked you where were you but you didn't answer. You then asked me if I was ok but I couldn't say anything because you experienced a lot worst.

The next day, I felt tired. More than usual actually. Then during assembly, I suddenly felt weak. My vision blurred and then nothing. When I woke up again, I was in the nurse's office. The nurse was gone though and Mr. Pyer was there sitting on the chair worried.

" Are you ok?" he asked looking at me worried.

I didn't say anything.

" Can you please tell me how did you get that?" Mr. Pyer asked.

I looked around and saw you standing by the door. You was looked at him and said, " You can trust him"

But I couldn't. Why does he want to know so badly anyway?

Suddenly, I was gone out of my body and you were there. You didn't say anything for a while before you answered," My dad"

Mr. Pyer looked angry after he heard this but continued to listen to you as you spoke. I tried to stop you, tried to take back control but I couldn't. That was until you tried to tell him how he touched you. You tried to say that he pinned you down. That you struggled but I got back control but I shouted No loudly.

I think he heard it though because he looked with a sad expression on his face.

I tried to save myself, to lessen what punishment I thought he would give me but I think it only made it worst.

" You know that you're relationship with your father isn't supposed to be that way, you know that right?"

I was confused and it seems like you were to.

" What?"

" You're father, he harmed you and made you do something against you're will."

" I don't.... what?" I questioned breathing heavy.

The air suddenly won't go in my lungs. I feel like I was dying. Mr. Pyer sat next to me. I flinched involuntarily.

Mr. Pyer calmed me down.

Mr. Pyer helped me regain control.

Mr. Pyer was so patient.

Mr. Pyer was not an ordinary teacher. He waited until I felt comfortable enough to say something and he always listened to me.

I felt weird telling him about you right infrount of you face but I did. Or did you? I don't quite remember. All I knew was it was over. Mr. Pyer looked at me concerned before saying, " Do you mind staying in the infirmary for a while?"

I nodded and he soon left. I was left to my own thoughts but in that moment I thought nothing. You were there, worried. "Maybe I shouldn't have told him? Is he going to punish me?" You asked.

" I told you but you didn't listen to me" I responded.

" We have to hide" you said pulling against my clothes towards the counter.

I let you take over as you hide in a small cupboard and remained quiet but something about this cupboard was restricting. Suddenly you was pushed out and I in. I remember something that my dad used to do. He used to lock me in a dark room where I would stay there for hours. My own thoughts my company. I always wondered why but I guess it's because I look much like my mom. Maybe he couldn't stand to see the thing that causes all his pain. He told me that my mom had postnatal depression, that it was all my fault. That I caused her to be like that and I needed to be punished. In those moments I always wondered what life would be like without me in it, just like right now. Suddenly my eyes drifted to the things in the cabinet, pills. I didn't really know what I was doing. I wasn't in my body, this time neither were you. We looked as this new person who I never met before was doing what I thought was the world a favor.