My life, as for myself, is nearly complete. It is not that extravagant but I’m not also struggling. Its simple and its normal. I am not rich nor beautiful— hmm yes, I am just that LADY in the middle.

Like most normal ladies out there, I also have my dreams, who else doesn’t have one? Me — To get marry, to have a family, to live with the person who loves me and vice-versa —that’s what i dream too.

My parents, my family, my friends and, yes of course, the love of my life; treat me as a princess minus the capricious living. I know how to balance so that I could stay happy.

Ahh. Yeaahh! Living normal is an heaven.

But wait, I also work for our plans. And so he do. We’ve been together for 5 years now, yes, 5 long years. And we never had a big fight, that’s why my friends are envious. They said I’m so blessed to have him, and so he was, right? Its a matter of give and take. We know that.

Just today, I wanna see him, he is my power source. Yea, I need to recharge and i want feel his hug. Just like that I believe something good is happening tonight.

—————

“C-can you please repeat what you have said now?”, I was in complete shock when he told me those words. None of those registers in my mind. I dont know how to react, shall I laugh? Is this some kind of a joke? You were just kidding right?

My mind is blurry now. “Please,a-again”. in the middle of this confusion, thats what my mouth speaks about.

“I said, let’s break-up.” he said as he looks straight on my eyes. “I am so tired of all these dramas and I am tired of keeping things up for us.” He paused, as if he was collecting his thoughts into words, and then again he speaks: “I’m so tired of you. I need to breath”

Shocked. My tears rushed as if they were in a race. Huh? How can this be happening? What did I do? “I c-cant understand...did—”, and cut.

He did not let me finish my words, he cut me off with his, telling and saying and speaking words from one to another and there I started to question myself.. DID I:

Ask him too many favors?

Step on his line?

Do something wrong?

Say something unnecessary?

Neglect a things so needed?

Wait? Why? What did I do? How come this is happening? Please pause, somebody please pause for a while. I’m not yet ready! Huh, Im not ready! Wait a minute! What shall I say?

And with all those thoughts and those questions running in my head, with those tears dropping on my cheeks, he continuously bickering his reasons.

I was stunned like everything flies so fast, the time, the people passing and walking outside this cafe, the words thats he speaks. I felt so tragic. Yes i do! I was starring at him, processing and processing.

I was so excited to meet him, to get my energy back and yet this??

“Please, lets not be like this. Let’s talk calmly. ” At last sentences came out.

“Yes, let us not be.” Without a blink he said it again, “Thats why im telling you, Let’s breakup.”

Pained

Stunned

Shocked

Confused

Hurt

And repeat

A minute

An hour

A two

Tiktok. Tik

Gone.

Right until then I realize...

I was here, left on this table.

ALL ALONE.

Day 1: Morning Me

*Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing* Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnng*

The alarm rings too loud today. I slowly open my eyes to reach it.

Ahh, was it already morning? Surely it was because the beams of light were glitching out of my curtain. Where am I? Silly of me, why am I asking those words, of course I’m in my room. *laughs bitterly* I sit on my bed as I touch my head trying to fix my bed hairs.

Huh.

That was awful. I dreamed of something awful last night. I shook my head to clear it up. There’s no way that my love will says those words.

“Let’s breakup.”

Ahh! Again? Why does it keeps on coming back? Why does it feel so real? There’s no ways that its true right? Dropping a little slap on my face, I encourage myself to be ready so I went to the bathroom to fix myself and prepare to work.

Maybe a cold bath will help to ease this pain. And yes it does. I feel much better now.

Distress? Gone

Sadness? Gone

Happiness? Well gained a little, *smiles* I’ll just chat my love later so that it would be completely achieved.

I really smiled as that thought cross on my mind, a single chat from him is everything since it was part of my daily life— a routine that I always get excite.

Let’s make this day BIG ahead. I grabbed my phone and search on my playlist. Oh, this one is great: *playing Banana Pancakes- Jack Johnson on the background *

“.. but, baby, you hardly even noticed.. hmm”

Boost me up a little bit. I even sing along with the song, gosh! I miss him so bad. Just wait a little okay, I’ll text you later. And I face the mirror.

Horrible girl! You looked so haggard, daeng! I looked terrible, my eyes are swollen and and there are even visible dark spots under it. Like girl, what happen? Are you a panda now?

Ugh! The urgency to relieve these total mess all over my face is ranging so up now, I put on some makeup and concealer to hide everything that I wanna hide. I cant believe this, I cant be this mess. Like seriously?

This one. *grabs a foundie* and this too *slide some light lipstick on my lips* and a little bit if this *spray some mist on my face* and quickly I turned to be, yes, that normal girl which I wanted to be. It was as simple as that. So again, I smile as I fix up my dress and wave a little on the mirror.

I grabbed my bag and move downstairs, hurry! Hurry! Oh how about breakfast? Maybe, I’ll just get myself bread and coffee later at the office.

I can’t be late. I dont want to have any bad records on my work. Okay this is fair enough.

As I wait for the taxi, I cant help but smile. Let me do my role first, I grabbed my phone and started to type:

“Good morning hon! I’m off to work now. Hope you have a nice day ahead. Goodluck to your work. I love you! 😘”

And sent.

“to the Voxier Bank please” I said to the driver with a full smile. Yash! What a nice day to start a day.