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Death Wants To Save Me

Part 1 - Wounds of the Past

The story begins in a bustling classroom where students eagerly participate in the lesson. Amidst the lively atmosphere, a 10 year-old student, Scylla, sits quietly at the back, observing her classmates quietly. Though she feels too anxious to join in, she's listening carefully to her teacher in front.

A few hours have passed, the exhausting class has finally come to an end. Scylla carefully gathered her belongings and immediately walked home.

As she opened the door, she was greeted by her mother who was watching TV with a beer in her hand.

"Oh, Scarlet. I'm glad you're safe."

Scylla just nodded in response. She went straight to her room where she changed her clothes, then she went downstairs and washed her face in the bathroom.

While staring at her reflection in the mirror, she wonders what kind of life she has?, what kind of a family is she living with? She looked around the messy bathroom, cracked walls, and dirty toilet.

She went back to her room and used her notebook to distract herself from her harsh reality.

While she was writing in her notebook, Scylla heard her father's voice downstairs. It seems like he's drunk again, complaining about everything inside their home. Scylla got up and locked the doors of her room and turned off the light. She's afraid that her father will see her and scold her again for no reason so she pretended to be asleep.

For Scylla, this is just an ordinary day. Her mother was not an alcoholic back then but that changed when problems started flooding their life. Scylla always thought that she was the problem, even though she was young, she already had a taste of reality.

Scylla usually spends her days locked in her room, afraid of her parents, never having the courage to tell her situation to anyone. She's lucky today, her father did not hit her, he's often angry that Scylla always hides from them and does not do anything useful.

...(A few weeks later)...

It's break time. Scylla can finally eat the piece of bread that she bought at the bakery earlier. Although she's alone at the back of their classroom, she likes it. The peace, and quiet environment is what she always wanted, until her male classmates started joking on her again.

A group of boys approached her.

"Hey, it's the lonely girl! Why are you always covered with bruises, you must be bad at sports." A boy said.

"And you're always quiet, you're so creepy." Another boy said.

The boys laughed. However, the girls heard them and threatened them away. Scylla was really thankful but she couldn't open her mouth and tell them how she felt.

...(A few hours later)...

Scylla stares at her classmates that has their parents waiting and walking with them, she knows she will never experience such things.

She walked towards her home, but this time, she went to a different route, causing her to be late but also get to explore the city.

Unfortunately, when she got home, her father was there. He was furious at her for being late.

"Where did you go? Huh? Don't you know what time it is?"

Scylla tried to respond.

"I... I just-"

"LOOK AT ME WHEN I'M TALKING TO YOU!" Her father shouted.

Scylla was shocked by how loud his voice were. Then, she started crying. Just as when her father stood up, her mother approached her from the kitchen.

"What's going on?" Her mom asked them.

"Your daughter went somewhere else. Look! What time is it? That girl needs to be disciplined."

"I'll talk to her." Her mother grabbed her hand and they went upstairs.

"Where did you go, Scarlet? You know your father will be mad if you're late." Her mother asked.

Scylla responded even though she can't stop crying.

"I-I... I j-just want to g-go around the s-streets..." Scylla tried her best to stop crying and speak clearly but she couldn't.

*Sigh* "Don't do that again. Go home as soon as possible after school. Don't go anywhere."

Scylla nodded, wiping her tears on her face. The quiet and emotionless girl finally broke down to tears, expressing her feelings but in the form of crying. She's been collecting her reasons to cry, and now she had the chance to let it all out.

Part 2 - Weak Men Create Hard Times

...(7 years later)...

Fortunately for Scylla, she's still studying as an 11th-grade student. Others might not realize but Scylla is really thankful that she could get to stay in school. She hates her home so much that she'll do anything to not be there.

At her school, she often notices that boys are staring at her. It made her feel uneasy and uncomfortable. She thought that they were looking at her bruises, but she realizes that her short skirt is showing her thighs. She then quickly adjusted it.

"Damn these perverts, and damn this skirt. I hate this uniform." She said to herself.

Throughout her years as a highschool student, she had some friends but none of them were so interested in her so far.

The bell rang, signaling the end of the class. As usual, she gathered her things and left the room as soon as possible.

She went straight to home, and as soon as she opened her door, she saw her mother drinking again.

"Ma, stop that, you never stopped drinking."

Her mother looked at her pale.

"Scarlet... You know this is how we escape this hell.." Her mother whispered.

Scylla then grabbed the beer on her mother's hand and put it in the trash.

"Ma, you're losing yourself again. You're the one that reminds me to be strong, right? What's happening to you?"

"I couldn't fix myself, dear... But you can still fix yours... Your life... That's why I'm always reminding you."

"But..." Scylla paused for a moment, then she hugged her mother that was sitting on the couch.

Then her mother said, "Change your clothes now, you're still gonna use that uniform tomorrow."

Scylla nodded. She went to her room and changed her clothes. She then went to the bathroom and washed her face, where she stared at her reflection again.

She said to herself, "Who am I? I don't know who I am."

After fixing herself, she went back to her mother but then saw her coughing a lot.

"Ma, are you alright?"

"Yeah, yeah *coughs* just had a cough, it happens often." *coughs*

"I told you to stop smoking, right? I thought you did."

"I did *coughs* for a while, I just had one stick, that's all.*

"Ma, we don't have any money to buy pills. What are we going to do?"

"Just- *coughs* give me a glass of water."

Scylla hurriedly went to the kitchen and grabbed a glass, and then she found out that they don't have any mineral water left.

"We're out of water, ma. Wait for me, I'll buy outside."

Scylla wore her sandals and went outside to buy her mother a bottle of water as soon as she could.

A few minutes later, she came back to her mother and handed her a cold bottle of water.

"I'm sorry, ma. This is all I can give you..."

"Don't worry, dear... This is more than enough. Start preparing for dinner, your father will come home soon."

Scylla nodded. She's still new to this, she's never been so caring with her mother. As she grows up, she's starting to realize that her mother cares for her too. She realized that her mother is just another victim like her.

Day by day, she started giving her mother more attention and care, as her lungs started to become worse.

...(A week later)...

Scylla and her mother went to a hospital for a free check-up. As they expected, there's no good news. The doctor announced that her mother might develop lung cancer if she doesn't stop smoking.

"I'm always reminding her to stop, doc. My father was also smoking, and an alcoholic." Scylla told the doctor.

"That's bad. You should convince him to stop if you could. Exposure to smoke caused by him is much more dangerous to you." The doctor replied.

"I know..."

"If you don't need anything else then you may go home now."

"Thank you, doc." Scylla and her mother head their way out of the hospital.

...(A few minutes later)...

"Since we can't afford to buy medicine, the only thing we could do is to stop you from smoking." Scylla said to her mother while walking home.

"I'll try." *Coughs* "I think it's getting worse." *Coughs again*

"You'll be better soon, ma. Stay strong."

The two finally arrived at their home. They saw the father's shoes so they expected him to be at home now.

Scylla guided her mother to sit on the couch.

"Stay here, ma. You must be tired from walking that far."

Scylla went to the kitchen to get her mother a glass of water. When all of a sudden, she smelled something unusual.

She gave the glass to her mother and went upstairs.

Scylla looked at her father's room, the door is open. She took a peek at a slightly opened door, when she saw something that shocked her.

Her father is sitting on his bed, facing the wall. It seems like he's hiding something. Scylla tried her best to identify what he was doing. Her heart beats quickly, but then it beats even faster when she confirms herself. Her father was using illegal drugs.

Part 3 - The Witness

As the weeks went by, her mother's condition worsened, to the point where she had difficulty breathing.

Although Scylla can't stop thinking about her mother, she still can't forget what she saw that day.

Today, her auntie came to visit her mother. Scylla and her are not very close, as she rarely gets the chance to meet her. She was 11 when she last saw her, almost 6 years ago.

Scylla hears their conversation while she's cooking eggs for their lunch.

"Where's your husband?" Her auntie asked.

"He's off to work, *coughs* he usually goes home 3 in the afternoon." Her mother replied

"Have you been to a hospital?"

"Yeah, he prescribed us medicines but we can't afford those. *coughs* I don't want to be a burden for Scarlet... But I don't know what will happen to her when I'm gone."

"That bastard wouldn't let himself get involved in this would he?"

"Oh... Scarlet said he asked him for some money to buy me medicine but he ignored her."

"I can't even believe there's a man like him that exists." Her auntie grabbed some money from her wallet, and gave it to her mother.

"Here, take this. This is all I can give you. I'm also struggling with my finances lately but I'll eventually get on to it." Auntie held her mother's hand as she gave her money.

"Thank you..."

"I'll get going now, I also have to cook for our lunch."

"Keep safe."

Her aunt grabbed her things and left them. Her mother called her to prepare for lunch. As Scylla prepares the table, her mother held her hand and inserted the money inside.

"Here's some money from your aunt, *coughs* you'll need it more than me." Her mother said to her.

"What? It's yours, I'll buy you your medicines."

"Keep it, I'm dying anyway. I can feel my heart beating slower each day."

"No, you will be cured, I'm praying for it! It'll come true."

Her mother chuckled.

"Since when did you learn to pray?"

"I... That's not important, you have to eat. Let's eat now."

Together, they shared their first food for the day. A simple fried egg and rice. Scylla watches her mother eat, when she notices that she's moving slower than before. Her mother left some food from her plate. She insisted on finishing up but her mother can't take it anymore.

(A few hours later)

Scylla lies on her bed, the boredom is killing her. She decided to message her friend that she met online.

"Hey, what's up?" Scylla typed on her phone.

"Hi there, I'm fine. Hbu?" Her friend replied.

"I'm fine too, I just want to ask something."

"Yeah, sure, what is it?"

"Don't take this seriously but, what will be your reaction if you find out that someone you know uses drugs?"

"Like, illegal drugs?"

"Yeah, like those."

"Your question is oddly specific."

"Just answer it."

"Fine, maybe I'll stay away from them, or let my parents know. Why did you ask?"

"I was just curious. Thanks for answering."

"Asking a question like that out of nowhere?"

"I was just really curious."

"Did you perhaps experience that?"

"What?"

"Tell me, what happened?"

"Wdym?"

"What happened?"

"To what?"

"You. You saw someone you know uses drugs?"

Scylla hesitated to reply for a while.

"Maybe..."

"For real? What's it like?"

"It smells weird, then it messes up with your head, I felt dizzy when I sniffed some."

"What's the smell like?"

"It smells like a flower, but then it changes... It's like persuading you to sniff more."

"So... How'd you find out?"

"My father, I saw him."

"What? That's crazy. I mean, he's crazy. Did you tell your mom? Or to anyone?"

"No, I don't want to stress my mom. I don't want to inform the police too, I don't want anything bad to happen to me or my mom, if he finds out that I told anyone."

"But does he know that you know?"

"I don't think so... I was just peeking on his door. I smelled something so I went to check on him."

"So your father is not only a smoker, alcoholic, and abusive. He's also a drug user?"

"Yeah he's the worst."

"The only good thing that I see here is that you don't have any siblings. I mean, they don't get to suffer like you."

"Yeah, it would be harder for me if I had siblings. Brb my mom is calling me downstairs, I left our clothes soaked."

"Sure, go ahead."

Scylla left her phone in her room and went downstairs outside to help her mother with the laundry. Whatever she does, the thought of making the next decision still bothers her. Whether to let her mother or the police know, or keep her mouth shut, hoping that it will never happen again.

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