**I** never saw this coming, I never thought that as a person born into this world that I was not allowed to have my own thought process, never have a choice in how my life was supposed to pen out. I mean I had no say in which man or women would come together to conceive me,in which city or town they would want to settle in to raise their future children, how many children they wanted and what big ideas and ambitions they had planned out for their future children and what sort of catastrophes such great ambitions will have on their children to be exact ME.
I mean,who would have thought things would escalate this quickly, I just was not interested in whatever plans they had for me, I did not want to be a part of it or get myself involved in anyway....but that was when I realised that i did not have a choice in this matter, it was a comply like a good girl situation or we force you to do this because we are your parents..we brought you into this world and you owe us.I did not have a choice I never did.
My parents with absolutely no regard for my feelings trying to make it seem like they want the best for me and they feel like they know what is best for me while pushing me into an arrangement just like theirs knowing very well that over three decades together in their union they still did not love each other. With this they still try to force me into the same predicament.
Why you may ask? To tell you the truth I do not know it myself. Five years ago at a family breakfast with my parents and three older siblings my parents made the announcement that there was a finalization in an arrangement between the Milton family which is mine and the Knocks family which are a powerful family affiliated to my family for generations through business and several partnerships had had some talks to what finalization it was, I was not told the specifics but my parents said it entailed a probable arranged marriage between one of the children. My two older brothers were already married so they were already out of the picture and my older sister who was five(5) years my senior was single and very beautiful I assumed she would be the one to bag this 'privilege' I mean the Knocks' were no small family. With me being the baby of the family, they were very powerful and known as powerhouses in and out of the business world.
Being associated and tied to such a family by way of marriage would set you and your entire family lineage for life and at least 10 generations to come. Even for a family as powerful as mine it would be a privilege to be associated with them by way of family (marriage).
With me being the baby of the family at nineteen years old then before all of this shenanigans would officially start I always assumed that this was not my problem and that this whole arrangement thing was sorted out and I was not to be concerned about it oh how wrong I was, I really wish I could chastise myself more for being so naive . Thinking and looking back on things I should have known,I should have seen the signs, the red flags dangling right in front of me .. But oh innocent me .. But... **NOT AGAIN**!!! **NOT** **ANYMORE**.
Getting to live my life happily for five years with no cares whatsoever about the family business that I was never involved with, just to have such news dropped Soo suddenly on my shoulders..after soo many years a news soo shocking that when it was announced i believed it was a sick joke ...till reality showed me otherwise.
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My name is Anneliese "Essei" Milton twenty four years old now and this is my story.
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Subconsciously... In my lucid state, I imagine myself hearing the early morning birds twittering ..outside my window,... singing hellos and hi's to themselves and to the wind...
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Do I really hear this you may ask???
**No** ... **No** I don't, I never have or at least not when I wake up early in the morning looking out through my French windows like your average person in your average home or hearing the "***cuck-a-doodle-doing***" of the roster at dawn through your window.
I mean, depending on what part of the planet you find yourself and the neighborhood you find yourself living in this may either be a normal everyday occurrence for you but for someone like myself having to experience that would be a very novel feeling. That is why I have none of those, not the twittering of the birds nor the cuck-a-doodle-dooing of the roosters.
You might wonder why not having such constant chaos from animals matters to me if I do not live on a farm .....that sounds weird and funny outright mental right????? or maybe that is really a pity you might say .
But for someone like me that has been living life like a caged bird since I can recall as far as my memories serve me I have grown immune to it and it does not bother me much anymore like it used to or at least that is what I choose to make myself believe, having to live like this for the period if time you have been alive you tend to grow immune to certain things, things like your wants, wishes and aspirations.
To be honest sometime in my early teenage years I sometimes wanted to be the rebellious teen in those rough periods.... you know.. Like do the sleep overs, try some alcohol or maybe even make out with some bad boys so my parents would find out and reprimand me or ground me but even that I could not do. I sometimes also crave the life of having your mom shout at you from across the house just to remind you to wake up or you would be late to school or reminding you to come get your dinner before it gets cold instead of having maids come wake you up or chefs cook your food...
Ugh,,but here I go again waking up at 6 starting the same routine all over again in the morning and just choosing to lay in bed looking up at the ceiling of my overly oversized and extravagant room finding a giant crystal chandelier staring right back at me and way too extravagant for my taste or the fresh and Porsche style decorations and design of the room or the overly large French windows all of this making me wish i was born to regular folks sometimes I know it sounds ungrateful and that maybe someone would wish they had my life but hey you can't choose that. can you I just....
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'Knock knock'.... Lady Essie it is time to wake up please you have to get up and get ready says my personal maid. Then again even my rumblings get interrupted. "I am already up" I respond to her ..I really want to shout at her and tell her I am not a child and she doesn't need to wake me up every day like a kindergartener ...but I can't because as my mother will say 'Essie ,that is very unladylike I believe your grooming teacher taught you better '' ughhhh"..
plus it really won't be fair to her as she is just doing her job. Living like this is truly exhausting.
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