I hurriedly packed my big hand bag, a pair of jeans, two body tops and a black blouse. Adding a container of my lotion, my perfume, roll on and my make up kit, well just in case I needed to do my face, funerals for modern days, you can never tell. The make up kit might come in handy.

I placed my bag in the back seat of my car and walked back inside. I just forgot to park a pair of shoes. All I needed was a pair of pumps and slippers.

” You are going for two days only Jennifer!” I scolded myself as l checked around if I left anything. I sighed recalling I needed to carry something to cover myself with in the night. Knowing my aunty would not have enough to give every relatives some beddings at the funeral, I couldn’t risk going to get myself squeesed in someone’s covers lest it got cold.

” Well that’s it!” I murmered to myself looking at myself in the mirrow.

I wore a black body top with black leggings, knowing I will throw over my chitenge when I got to Kabwe. My hair was covered in a gray headsock.

Locking the door to my house, I got in my car and started the engine almost immediately.

Probably wondering who this busy body is?, Well am Jennifer Makasa, a single woman aged 26, working as a banker in Lusaka at NATSAVE bank.

I received a call that the brother to my aunty(Ex wife to my uncle, the young brother to my mother) died the previous day. Having grown up close to my aunty, it mattered less that she and my uncle were no longer together, I needed to be there for her and having a weekend ahead, I knew I could use it to be there.

I knew the man who died, I saw him as I grew up though he never visited my aunty more often. His wife was a good woman and good with hair plaiting, I knew cause I always went to have my hair done before I completed my course.

As I joined Cairo road, driving from my home in Makeni Villa, I fastened the seat belt and raised my head high to have a clear view of the road ahead. It was around 7 in the morning so being a Saturday, the road was not conjested yet.

Increasing the speed as I passed Kabwe round about I let my mind wild off as the slow tracks I was playing in the car got to my ears soothing the emptiness that I was feeling.

” lt’s not what you think babe” came the voice of my ex boyfriend pushing through the serenity that the songs were bringing to my heart.

My perfect boyfriend, who I thought was the man I would settle with even if I never loved him much, broke my heart by getting intimate and making out in my own house with my best friend.

I had walked unannounced one afternoon after getting a sick leave from work. Daniel had come to visit me all the way from Choma where he was working from and he was going to stay for a week. Which actually prompted me to fake an illness and sign for some days off.

I was rushing home to give my sweet boyfriend the news just to open the door and blessing my eyes with a scene of my Daniel pushing himself into my friend Chola as they both moarned in pleasure.

” What the hell!” I shouted dropping my hand bag and the sick note I was holding to show to Daniel.

They both startled standing up as Daniel looked at me his face still filled with his unfinished business.

My friend just bow her head I wondered what she was feeling, definitely not shame, cause I had assumed a person with a sense of shame wouldn’t bang her best friend’s man especially in her own house.

” Jen, babe it’s not what you think ” Daniel stood before me trying to hold my hand.

” And what is it that you think, l am thinking?” I asked pushing his hand away from mine.

He stammered lost for words, I couldn’t make out anything from the whisper that came from his large lips.

” Get out of my house both of you!” I snored angrily.

” Get out! ” I shouted further pushing back the tears that formed in my eyes, even though it was too late as I felt their warmth run down my well made up face.

” Let’s talk about this babe, please. I was just ….”

” Dan!” I cut him short raising my hands.

” I swear to God if l come back here to find both of you still here, believe me I am willing to serve a sentence whilst you rot in hell!” I snapped and pushed him aside making passage for myself as I walked to my bedroom.

I heard Chola talk in a low voice tone and my heart pumped faster with the feel of her betrayal.

A few minutes later I heard Dan’s car engine revving and I quickly grabbed his small laptop bag putting all his small things inside and rushed out before he could drive away.

” Take your cursed things you jerk! And never come back to my house again!” I shouted throwing the bag at him and not minding the cracking of the laptop which was inside.

” As for you” I said pointing my finger at my best friend.” You will surely have a taste of what you have done to me!” I told her off and didn’t wait to hear her response as I ran back inside locking my door like I was scared they might come back.

……

“Peeeeeeep eeeeeeep!” Came the sound of a vehicle behind me bringing me back to my senses. I didn’t realise the traffic lights had indicated green.

I sighed stepping away from the brakes as l drove on. ” They are not worthy my tears!” I whispered to myself and wiped the tears from my face.

After all I had been a single woman for over 3 months and even though I missed being with both of them, I had decided to move on without them.

The 2 hours drive to Kabwe came to an end and as I parked my car by the road side, outside the funeral house, I saw a few faces turn my way.

I composed myself getting my Chitenge and wrapped it around my waist before stepping out.

The voice of my aunty calling out my name as I got to the entrance made me remember the tradition of wailing as one visited a funeral house especially that I was considered family.

” Oh my God! Uncle mwayaaa!” I yelled out feeling off as I didn’t feel that much pain Inside myself.

The others welcomed me with their crying and after some minutes it was silent and I could hear people’s voices talking and laughing.

” Well, I whispered in my head. Some funerals are funny huh, a minute ago people were wailing and now they go on discussing some issues like they were in a market place.”

” How was your journey? ” aunty asked making me realise I had gone off again.

” lt was okey aunty, it’s sad uncle is gone I was devastated when I received your call yesterday” I whispered sadly and she went on explaining what happened to me.

Later that night a group of people came and sung some funeral songs. They didn’t come from church though, I was told they were a group of drunks who sung at every funeral in the compound for a reward of Nshima.

I went to sit outside with my aunty and other women as we listened to the songs and people laughing. Then something caught my attention.

A man clad in some covers with PF labels sat silently in the corner near the men’s fireplace.

A plate of Nshima on the ground as he ate slowly.

” Who is he?” I asked my aunty and she looked at the direction my finger was going to..

” Who? ” she giggled

” That man there?” I asked knowing she knew who I meant.

” Oh that man is not well, he is a mad man that goes round and settles wherever there is a funeral and he never leaves unless after burial” she explained

” Oh sad” I sighed honestly feeling bad for him even if I couldn’t see his face.

” l wonder what happened to him to get like that” I said not to anyone in particular..

” never mind abalumendo banomba ifyakuchitachita ( young men of this era are fond of issues)” my aunty responded and I murmered casually.

“I think I need to sleep now, l feel tired” I announced and my aunty showed me a reserved space for me.

As I closed my eyes to allow sleep take me over I couldn’t stop thinking of the blurred image of the mad man outside. I started wondering how he was feeling being in his condition. ” Does he feel cold, does he feel any kind of emotion?” I asked myself a series of questions until I felt sleep drowning me as I allowed my body to rest amid the noise around.

.

.

.

TO BE CONTINUED....

I kept my eyes on him. He was so quiet and peaceful it pricked my heart. ” how can a man so handsome, with a long light face and a pointed nose, be mad? ” I asked myself folding my hands as I sat directly facing him.

He was slowly eating his morning Nshima and my eyes went down his hands. ” oh My,” the long clean and sharp nails on his fingers caught my attention. He slowly and gently rolled the lamp of Nshima in his palms. It was like he was some kind of perfectionist.

One would tell from the skin tone that even in his madness he still bathed his body. If not for the additional clothes he had put on and the chitenge pieces wrapped around him, one would surely think the man was okey.

” Jennifer!” My cousin called me.

” I think we better start off now, the busses are here and people are boarding.” She informed me and I stood up sighing.

” of course. But I will use my car, let aunty and the other 3 elderly people come join me ” I responded adjusting my Chitenge as I walked to the car.

Taking one more glance in my back to see the man again and walking fast to the vehicle.

As they lowered the casket in the grave, the reminder thoughts of my dead parents clicked and I shed tears.

I had grown up from different homes after my parents passed on years back, and sometimes I missed them. Especially with the funeral I was attending, it was unavoidable to think of my parents.

For a moment my thoughts were taken away from the man I left eating at home. ” The Lord had given, and now he has taken, we can not question him for he is God. Let us just pray that the soul of our beloved son, Brother and friend may be in the hands of the almighty God” the man who was helping with the prayers spoke up.

I watched in silence as the people added some flowers on the grave and later on it was all over.

I needed to go back to Lusaka, Monday was to be a working day. So when we got back home I put all my things in the car and waited for the conclusions of the funeral after lunch.

I looked around for the mad man with my eyes. My heart skipped when I couldn’t see him anywhere.

” hey aunty. Has that man left?” I asked my aunty.

She let a laugh and looked at me.” That man must have affected you so much”

” I know right” I shrugged casually. ” it’s just that I can’t help feel this deep concern about him. It’s like I knew him before he got like that ” I told her with sincerity.

” he has moved, I think he is in the back” she finally told me and I felt myself relax a bit.

” so anyone knows who that man is?” I asked again this time causing the other woman who was nearby look up at me.

” rumor has it he was okey, like he went to the University and found a good Job here in Kabwe. I don’t really know if the rumor of him sleeping with a widow is true. People say he came from Lusaka.”

” I see” i nodded my head narrowing my eyes.

” what’s his name Aunty? ” I asked the lady

” he is Ba Benja. But one can never tell for sure. A lot of people just refer to him as Ba bwali because of the Nshima quantity he’s able to consume in a meal” she responded with a chuckle.

My mind started imagining what the man was like before, I thought of the possibility of him having a family but I still wondered why they let him wonder around instead of taking him to the hospital or something just to help him.

Before saying my farewells, I walked to the back where the man was now seated quietly he was dozing off.

I stood before him seeing no one was paying attention, except my cousin who stood with me. I looked at the man from his torn shoes up to his half covered face. The silkness of his black beards driving my desire to feel them in my hands. I analysed the curves of his mouth and eyes. ” he’s so perfect” I whispered not knowing I had said it loudly.

” what?” My cousin asked patting my hand.

” Ba Jen, what did you say?” She accused her eyes already displaying the laugher that was to come from her mouth.

” I said I pity him” i lied clearing my throat.

” what’s your name?” I asked the man not sure if he understood Bemba.

I was taken by surptise when he lifted his white eyes at me. His lips curved into a smile and he answered with a laugh that was so low but audible… ” my name is Benjamin” he smiled amid his laugh making my inside turn with joy at the sound of his voice. He spoke what I thought was perfect english. Maybe the theory of the University had some truth to it, I wondered.

I wanted to ask him more but the attention of people around now made me realise I was acting up.

I felt some wetness in my eyes and I knew standing there any more minute, would make people think I was not so normal. I composed myself and walked to my car.

After my cousin requested for some money which I couldn’t hear as to how much she was mentioning or the purpose of the money.

I just nodded my head and smiled at her as I started the engine.

” will see what i can do my dear” i added and the car was now moving away slowly.

The journey back was not so much as I had planned it to be. Instead of me thinking of what I would do the following day at work or looking forward to watching my favourite TV show, all I kept on thinking was the mad man Benjamin.

” what is wrong with you silly!” I scolded myself after I got home and now was standing in front of the mirrow in my bathroom. ” you are surely not well and this nonsense has to come to an end!” I whsipered loudly.

It didn’t make sense to me that I was feeling so affected by a mad person, it’s not like it was the first time i heard or saw a mad person. I didn’t get myself and the feeling was so frustrating I failed to do anything reasonable that evening.

I tried to organise my clothes for Monday, sitting in front of the TV but every chance my mind took off and the images of Benjamimn flipped through.

” oh my God what is wrong with me?” I screamed in the couch pillow. I guessed the loniless I was going through contributed so i called a friend from work. We weren’t that close but atleast he kept my company at lunch hours and sometimes weekends.

” hey Kegan!” I said trying to sound excited.

” Hey! Girly! ” he responded as he always did.

” you back? ” he asked before I could say another word.

” yeah. Was wondering if you have anything planned out for this evening, am bored to the core.”

” provided you settle the bills am all yours!” He laughed

” grow up man, you are a man and supposed to spent, you are shameless” I teased and I heard him go on his theories of women spending too on outings and how women always applied gender when things were in their favour.

” alright it’s fine the bill is on me. We meet at Makeni mall?” I inquired as I removed my clothes to take a shower.

” see you!” He cut the line and i threw the phone on the bed pulling my leg from the jeans.

Within 30 minutes I was done preparing myslef. Wearing a pair of faded jeans and a wood on top, I finished up with some canvas, my face plain with only some lip gloss on my lips. satisfied with my tomb boy looks, I walked out to the car speeding off.

Upon seeing me park my car in the parking lot, Kegan walked towards me raising his hands and shouting on top of his voice.

” the buyer is here!” He screamed and I smiled at him as I locked the car door.

“You are such a child, Kegan grow up you are 28 years old !” I laughed making him make some boy dance as his hands kept in the pockets.

” I can father a child and I have told you time and again, don’t judge a book by its cover ” he laughed wincing at me.

” mnmmm I pity the chicks you lay with” I shook my head as we walked to the mall.

” so how did the funeral go?” He asked as we waited for our pizza at Debonairs.

” good, quiet captivating if I may add” I said with a flirt smile which I didn’t notice until I saw kegan raise his eyes at me.

” tell me more!” He sat up with a silly smile on his lips.

” what!” I giggled. ” you are silly, you want to hear the details of a funeral are you nuts?” I looked at him.

” mmmhmhm, I know you my friend met a man and i can feel you” he teased mimicking my voice.

” the way that word ‘captivating’ came out, I know there’s a name to it. So drop the act and fill me in on this dude” he shrugged putting the bottle of coke aside as the waiter placed the pizza box on our table.

I took my fruitree and drunk half of it trying to swallow the shame that came with my thoughts.

” how can i be so stupid” I spoke to my mind.

” no there is no man Kegan. Come on, I just went for a day and you expect me to find that interesting man. Besides I told you am off dating for now. You men tend to be jerks most of the times and am not ready to spend another period of my life crying over some jerk.” I remarked and saw Kegan grinn.

” any way I will wait till the day you will spill it out. You can’t lie to me Jen, you know I know almost everything about you” he pointed out and grabbed a piece of pizza taking a bite.

” now this is life ” he smiled chewing on the pizza.

I looked at him, ” if only you knew who is gotten me this crazy ” I smiled at the thought and pulled myself a piece shoving it in my mouth as though a big bite would clear all my unrational thoughts.

WATCHOUT FOR EPISODE 3

I paced around my sitting room, I couldn’t sit down. I just came up with a stupid idea and the very thought of it scared me, I could feel my heart pumping fast.

I patted my thighs direct on my skin as I had worn a very short tight indoor black shirt. ” Come on!” I shook my head trying to get the idea out of my mind.

It had been a month after l travelled to Kabwe but I never stopped thinking about Benjamin. How ironic, I even stopped referring to him as a mad man in my thoughts. I had created this fantasy of him being a normal man like any other hot guy I had seen before. Only that I felt so much drived by the thoughts of Benjamin.

I had called my aunty the previous day and she told me as we chatted that her neighbour and friend passed on.

Imagine I felt excited at the news. I knew going to the funeral for a person I didn’t even know in the name of my aunty was absurd. But then l recalled the voice of aunty.” He goes round settling wherever thére’s a funeral”

An idea had popped up my head and I was so scared at it that I couldn’t calm down. Knowing what I wanted to do was going to be considered madness and probably other people would think I wanted to start rituals or something out of this world.

Before I could talk myself out of it, I walked to the bed room and grabbed my hand bag. I was going to travel to Kabwe and there was no stopping myself.

The entire month had been hectic making me lose control of what I was supposed to do at work. ” Well it’s better to act than live with the torment of these thoughts” I comforted myself as I pulled my Allion from the yard.

” Aunty, am on my way but will leave tonight. I just want to bring the money for Carol (my cousin) she has been pestering me but I couldn’t send it over. I have missed you too” I told my aunty on the phone as I pushed my fingers in my kink hair. I was supposed to have it braided but the sudden trip disturbed all my programs.

” You will find us Jen. Am just surprised you are visiting so soon. The way I know you, I was thinking of another 6 months before you showed up here” she went on.

” Well, guess I have heard all the cancel from elders huh ” I teased and pushed my leg to acceralate the car.

By the time I was getting to Kabwe it was past 14 hours in the afternoon. I passed through shoprite and picked some groceries for them. Luck them then, I was loaded, I just got my salary the previous day, with the bonus I got , well, I could spare something on family.

The welcome was great as usual and after a lot of chatting and catching up I asked my aunty if we could go and visit the funeral house. Definitely my inner intentions were to go and check on Benjamin, but I dared not to mention him.

With the way I acted up, trying to talk about him again would cause people to think otherwise of me. So I pretended I didn’t recall anything about the man.

We got to funeral house and I almost jumped with joy upon seeing Ba Benjamin seated on a stool in the corner. He was as always, quiet and covered in his load of clothes.

I felt myself panick inside when the reason for my travel rushed through my mind. I looked around the place , a few people seated around. All the time as we sat in the funeral house all I could think of was my plan.

At exactly 18 hours I said my good byes giving an excuse I had to go back to Lusaka. I drove away and reached town parking my car by Shoprite in Kabwe town.

I asked the taxi driver I had booked to take me to the funeral house.

” What’s your name ?” I asked him breaking the silence in the car as he drove me.

” Mwiche” he answered obviously surprised I was asking his name.

” Listen I have something important I need you to do for me then I will pay you handsomely. ” l told him with a calm face.

He turned to look at me, ” what do you want me to do?” He asked, evidently intrested in making some extra cash.

” I am not going to the funeral per say, I am going to get my brother who Is not well. Now am ashamed of reaching there cause I don’t even know the person who died. Am asking if you can help me get a man who is not mentally okey from that place for a reward of $100″ I made my offer and now the man looked more puzzled.

” What?” He spoke loudly.

” A mad man?” He asked

” Hmmhm!” I murmered nodding my head.

” All I want is for you to go and find a way of getting him out of that place to this car then you will drive us back to town” I went on explaining.

” Well, I don’t know ma. Mad men are not easy to convince. How do I even get him to come with me?” He shrugged.

” $200!” I increased the offer and I saw his face light up.

” Seriously? ” He asked.

” Get me my brother and $200 plus whatever I owe you for booking will be all yours” I shook my shoulders smiling widely.

I went through the details of what he was to say and do as we got closer.

” Don’t say anything about me, l can’t have people thinking of me as a sister to a mad man, you know how it is ” I shrugged again.

” Don’t worry sister, I got this” the taxi driver smiled as he got out of the car.

I had him park a few meters away from the funeral house. I sat up anxiously as he walked away.

After 10 minutes I was almost giving up on him succeeding. ” Oh my God let this work!” I said a little prayer running my hands in my Kink hair which was my habit whenever I was nervous or feeling stupid. Right at the moment I had no idea which of the two caused the habit to come out.

I was lost in my struggle when I heard the taxi drivers voice.

He was walking ahead, as Benjamin walked slowly behind him. Now I could see his full height. He had a good height I noticed and stayed down as the driver opened the back door for him.

He closed it back and walked up front.

” Well, thank you” I looked at him.

” lt was really hard getting him out of there. You have no idea what I had to do” he responded

” Spare me the details,” l smiled at him as he put the keys in the ignition.

I looked back at Benjamin and he was so quiet it scared me. ” Hey Benjamin!” I tried to smile at him but he raised his white round eyes at me then back at his finger nails.

” Am taking you to a nice place where you will get help” I told him not sure he even heard me.

Upon reaching town. I had the driver help me take him to my car and after paying him off, I turned back at Benjamin who was now murmuring something and by the second he was getting louder.

Well thanks to Google I got a seductive before I went to Kabwe. I knew it wouldn’t be easy carrying a mad man in the back of the car.

Well, after giving him a dose of an injection I saw him calm down and I slowly helped him lay down in the back seat. Satisfied he looked comfortable I pulled out his chitenge covers and left him with a loose T-shirt inside.

Wondering if I didn’t feel the scent from his clothes? Well, lets just say nothing else mattered at the moment but to take him with me.

I threw the covers in the trunk and drove out of town. I didn’t know what I was really going to do with him yet, but I had a good feeling in my bones. Call me a mad woman or crazy, I felt I was doing just right..

WATCHOUT FOR EPISODE 4