We all have secrets, things we don't want anyone to know, about embarrassing things that happen to us, about someone we like, about infidelity, something we keep quiet out of fear. But there are some secrets that are very heavy to bear, even after death they continue to weigh on us.

You say the hardest secrets to see are the ones that are hidden in plain sight, or those that everyone knows, but pretends not to know so as not to end up stained by it, not realizing that they are consumed by it up to their necks, just by looking the other way.

My name is Alicia Morgan, I am 26 years old and I am a forensic doctor. My life was normal, my best friend was my twin sister Alana.

Despite living thousands of miles apart we were very close, we saw each other on vacation, holidays or whenever we had the opportunity. When our parents divorced, they made us choose who we would live with and they separated us. I came to the city with my mother to start a new life and my sister Alana stayed to live with my father. Over the years we grew up, but our special connection remained. When we were close, that connection was stronger to the point of scaring our parents, because we could feel what was happening to the other.

When we were nine years old, we decided to climb a tree to retrieve my sister's kite that had become entangled in the branches. But when I climbed, the branch broke, hitting my head and leaving me instantly unconscious. One of our friends alerted our parents about it, finding both of us unconscious.

Although the doctor checked my sister, she was perfectly fine and only woke up when I did. Afterwards, our parents' fights became evident, each day more and more until they divorced and separated us. It was a hard blow for us because we did everything together, but time made us take our own path. She graduated as a teacher in the village and started working as a secondary school teacher, everyone loved her because she was sweet, warm, and made people instantly like her.

But everything changed that day, that cursed day, that June 6th I woke up as any other day with my alarm, made my bed, looked for my clean uniform and packed it in the suitcase with all my stuff ready for my job. I had been the second forensic doctor at the police station for a year.

I bathed, got dressed, made a ham and cheese sandwich. But from the moment I woke up I felt that feeling of sadness, something that was pressing on my chest, that bad presentiment.

I decided to call Alana, but she didn't answer. I insisted several times, but got nothing. I breakfasted quickly, because my boyfriend called to say he was waiting downstairs.

I washed the juice glass, grabbed my purse and left, walking to meet William. As I finished my sandwich, I saw my boyfriend who handed me a coffee. He had done this every morning since we had been dating for two years. One of the many things I loved about him was that he was a gentleman and supported me in everything.

But I had that feeling that I could not explain.

William: Ali, dear, I'm talking. While he drives.

Ali: I'm sorry, I was distracted.

William: So, are we going to Tamy's birthday party tonight?

Ali: I don't know, I don't feel like it. Honey, I have a strange feeling.

William: We're here, honey. Let's just go for a bit and you can distract yourself and shake off that frown, okay?

Ali: Okay, I say goodbye to him with a kiss, which he returns with another, more passionate one. I head into work, greet everyone, change and read the report. There are only two autopsies scheduled for today.

After I'm done, I call my sister again, but she doesn't answer. The day goes by as usual, but with that nagging feeling inside me that won't let me be in peace.

I call my father, even though we're not on good terms. But he doesn't answer either. At the end of my shift, I call my mother who is traveling with her husband on a cruise, to see how she is getting along, but she sounds very happy.

After speaking to her, I get ready, not feeling well, this niggling feeling was killing me, this feeling was too strong, when Will came to pick me up for Tamy's birthday, he was talking and my mind felt like it was somewhere else, I couldn't think about anything, only about this feeling that was suffocating me, but I didn't know what to do.

I knew nothing about my dad and my sister Alana, we got to the club for the party, Will was taking care of the gift, we wished Tamy a happy birthday, everyone was dancing, but I was only interested in leaving, unconsciously, I stole the car keys from my boyfriend, while he was talking to his friends.

I left the club, planning to drive to the village. I had to see my sister, hear her voice telling me she's fine. The village was four hours away. I intended to go there, having this gut feeling that something was fatally wrong. The sky was black and the darkness was eminent, watching rain drops begin to fall. A storm was coming.

Suddenly my chest hurt and it seemed like I couldn't breathe while driving. When suddenly I lost control of the car, all I remember was a sharp impact and a jolt of the car, I feel strong buzz in my ears, my phone, with its now broken screen, began to ring.

With my hurting body and my hands covered in blood, I picked it up, I couldn't ask for help because I couldn't get my voice out, I just hear the voice and those words that broke me.

"We are sorry to inform you that your sister Alana...Her body was found lifeless, everything indicates that she committed suicide... Hello, is there anyone there...can you hear me— (on the line)" As I just watch the rain fall and everything becomes dark for me...

It's as if I'm caught in a dream, chasing after my sister Alana, yet I can't seem to find her, or when I do, she vanishes before my eyes. There's something different about her; joy has left her eyes, her dress is torn, and bruises mar her body; her voice is all I hear.

"Ali, it wasn't me."

I yearn to respond, but images of us laughing and playing as we always did, and then visions of myself on the road losing control of the car, are what I last heard before waking in a room, unsure of where I am, blinded by the light. Then I see my mother, tears of joy streaming down her face.

Violetta: My child, you've awakened. I thought... I thought I'd lose you, too.

Ali: Mom, I'm thirsty. Confused.

Violetta: (wiping my tears away, she passes a glass of water with a straw) You've been in a coma for three months... You can't imagine the pain of losing my daughter so suddenly, inexplicably, and then to be told your other daughter is in intensive care... I felt like I was dying.

Ali: Mom... Mom, please tell me it's a lie that my sister is just waiting outside.

Violetta: Feeling a lump in my throat, my heart aches.

"I wish more than anything to tell you that," crushed.

Ali: Mom, she wouldn't do it. I'm certain of it. The world is collapsing around me. A sharp dagger pierces my chest, causing pain, burning, and agony. I try to strip everything away, only repeating, "She didn't do it, she didn't do it." I start to rip everything off in desperation; I want to escape; I feel like I can’t breathe—

Violetta: Please, someone help me! A doctor! — screaming, holding onto my daughter.

Then the doctor comes in to administer a sedative.

I watch her go still. I can see she's shattered. Ever since their birth, they were one. What’s odd is that it's been three months since the accident. The doctors said there were no injuries or fractures, yet her body doesn't respond, as if she's lost in deep slumber. I sense my girl felt her sister's death; they've always had this eerie bond since they were little that somewhat frightened me.

I see William enter the room.

William: I came as soon as I heard. How is she? Concerned.

Violetta: (Drying my tears) She had a crisis. The doctor had to sedate her. Watching my daughter, now asleep in the bed.

"Thank you for not leaving her side during this time, and for being there for her."

William: Don't thank me. You know I love her. My studies in England are all set, and I want her to come with me. It might help her to get away and ease the pain a little. I've talked to my parents, and they said they would support her doing a postgraduate degree in criminology.

Violetta: Thank you. It's what’s best for her. It will do her good. Holding his hand, I'm glad he's my daughter’s boyfriend. You're a good man.

(Hours later)

Ali: I wake up and see him asleep in the room's chair.

I try to stand up, but my body feels heavy, and I nearly fall, but Will catches me and helps me walk to the bathroom and back.

"Hello," I say.

William: Hey, you don't know how happy I am to see those green eyes again. I almost lost my mind when I heard...

He wraps his arms around me for a kiss, and I cling to him.

Just then, a nurse comes in with food; I watch her devour everything.

"The doctor said they're going to run some tests, and if all is well, you can go home."

Ali: Can I ask you a favor?

Can you get my sister's autopsy report?

William: Alright, I'll get it if it brings you peace.

Ali: What have you been told? What did mom tell you?

William: I sit on the bed, taking her hand.

"Please rest. We'll have time for that later."

Ali: I want to know everything. I know she didn't do it. I'll do everything in my power to prove it.

William: I know what your sister decided is hard to come to terms with; even your mother doesn't understand. Your father took care of everything.

All we know is they found her body in the garden, hanged with a rope around her neck.

Ali: I know she didn't do it. Was there a note, anything to say why?

William: I haven't heard anything like that, love. I stayed with you, and your mother traveled back to town for the funeral.

Ali: Funeral? Confused.

"I didn't get to say goodbye or see her one last time," as tears dampen my cheeks, I feel his embrace.

William: That was three months ago.

Ali: Shocked.

"So I've been here in the hospital for three months..."

William: Love, I want to ask you something.

Ali: Yes, tell me.

William: Do you want to go to England with me? It would be good for you, a change. My parents offered to help you specialize.

Ali: Love, you know I love you. But I can’t. Looking into his eyes.

William: Love, think about it. It's good for our future.

Ali: I know. But I have nothing to think about. Now more than ever, I know what I want, and I won't have peace, and I won't forgive myself if I don't do this.

I'll return to town and investigate what happened to my sister.

If you want to help me, ask your father to get me a position as a forensic pathologist back home.

I know your father has influence.

William: Alright, I'll talk to my father, and I’ll take a sabbatical to help you.

Ali: Don't do that for me. Go to England, study, fulfill your dreams. I don't want you to stall your life for me. If you come with me, you'll be making a big mistake.

That's why I want us to break up.

I want to cry but swallow my tears. It's what's best for him.

William: How can you ask that we end things? Don’t you love me?

Ali: It's because I do love you that I'm asking you to end things, to go and study, achieve your dreams.

I have issues to resolve and will not rest until I find the truth.

William: Are you sure about this? Because once I walk out that door, everything between us will be over.

Ali: Yes.

William: Please, Ali, reconsider.

I just lie down, turn my back.

So he will leave, though it hurts. It's the right thing to do...

After Will left, my mother soon came in furious about what I'd done, but my mind was set, and no one could sway me.

I was discharged from the hospital, and we were on our way home.

Ali: I watched the streets and surroundings as my mother drove.

"Mom, Roberts?"

Violetta: He's at work. He's been helping to take care of you.

Ali: "Mom, are you happy with him?"

Violetta: Yes, very happy. He's a good man. As you’re driving…

Ali: Dad visited me at the hospital.

Violetta: Only once.

"Are you sure about what you're doing?"

Ali: Yes, I want to know the truth.

Violetta: My heart says she didn't do it. But promise me you'll take care of yourself and call me every day. If you find out anything or if you're in danger, come home. You know I love you, and I couldn't stand to lose you.

Ali: I promise, Mom. (smiles)

When we got home, my mother handed me a box with a new phone with my same number, and some of my friends were there as a welcome-back celebration.

I was having a good time until William called wanting to talk. I called a taxi and went to his apartment. I knocked on the door until he opened it.

William: Hey, come in. (He opened the door wider for me.)

"I wanted to look for you after you were discharged, but I wanted to give you space. Are you sure about what you're going to do?"

Ali: Yes, now more than ever.

I watched him go to the kitchen counter and grab a manila envelope.

William: I spoke with my father.

He managed to get you the job since there’s no coroner. They quit, he said, handing me the envelope.

Ali: Quit? (puzzled)

William: Quit after your sister’s autopsy. There’s a copy of the autopsy report.

Ali: (I open the envelope, take out the papers and start to read.) This report... it's incomplete. There are many missing details about the victim, gastric content results, urine tests, if there's any evidence of drugs in her blood... This is very strange, there are many inconsistencies.

Information

FORENSIC REPORT from the Denver Institute of Legal Medicine Requested by: Denver Judicial Authority Purpose of the report: Opinion on cause of death Alana Morgan Smith Location: Denver Date of report: June 7, 2022, at 10:00 AM Forensic Medical Examiner: Esteban Saez

Preamble: The body was found at dawn on June 7, 2022, hanging from a rope in the garden. By the time of the body's removal (10:00 AM), when taken down, it is seen that the rope is 2mm thick and the knot is situated at the back of the neck. Entering the house, it was found in complete order. No farewell note from the deceased was found. The last contact has a clean call history.

External examination: The body was found hanging, shoeless, wearing a lilac dress revealing scratches and bruises on the arms, fixed ante mortem. General characteristics: Name of the deceased: Alana Morgan Smith Height and weight: 1.62m and 60kg Build: Slender Hair: Dark brown Age: 26 years Marital status: Single Distinguishing marks: A moon tattoo on her left wrist. There are no visible signs of dehydration on the skin or in the mucous membranes except for Stenon Louis's sign, being found with eyes open. Fixed lividity is located on the neck area, suggesting a time from 12 to 16 hours post-mortem. Rigor mortis is challenging to overcome and there is tongue protrusion due to the swelling tongue pushing against the teeth. There are grooves on the neck, and a bit of blood in the ears. Reddish lividity is found on the extremities, concentrated in the distal regions. The mouth shows foamy edema and there is pallor and petechial skin rashes on the face. After removing the rope, It is established that it was a complete hanging—the body was in full suspension, symmetrical with the knot right at the back of the head, and typical due to the position at the back of the neck. The rope used is a hard one which produced hard furrows.

Cause of death: Suicide

Ali: It can't be right; they’re withholding information. There’s no autopsy, only a description of finding her body. Sometimes, in viewing a victim, we must look beyond. Sometimes, one detail changes everything.

Now everything’s clear. Someone is going through a lot of trouble to hide things, and it’s suspicious that the coroner resigned. (using air quotes)

The scratches could have been defensive wounds. I know my sister was a fighter; she would fight until her last second.

I collapsed on the couch, crying. Will’s arms enveloped me until I calmed down.

"I think I should go. Thanks for helping me, as always."

While he took my hand.

William: Wait, take this—it’s a plane ticket to England for the day after tomorrow. I will wait for you, but if you don’t come, I’ll take that flight without you, and that will be your decision. But stay with me tonight.

Ali: I just looked at him and caressed his face while he kissed my hand. Then I approached him and we lost ourselves in a kiss that gradually intensified until we were wrapped in pleasure, eventually falling asleep.

I rose before dawn, dressed, took my things, and looked at him one last time, leaving the plane ticket on the nightstand so he'd know not to wait for me.

With the coroner's papers in hand, I left, ready to pack and seek the truth behind my sister's death...