"Thank You Chifuyu"

I stare into his eyes as he drifts away and shuts his eyes slowly. I cry as all of the warmth of Baji leaves his body and hug him tightly. I closely look at his face and see blood dripping down his mouth. The only person I ever cared about is now in my arms dead. Everything around me disappears as the only thing I have left of him is the blood dripping out of his mouth. I scream as if I was the one who was stabbed but no I scream since the only person I ever respected is dead. Takemichi pulls me away from Baji's body and holds me.

This is the only time that I've felt warm but it's not inside Baji's arms. Takemichi's body is shaking as he cries with me. All I hear is his breath and repeated sorries. I can't stop myself from looking at his body which now has a pile of blood around his body. It should have been me who died not him. My knees give up and I fall down onto my knees and cry. I feel Mitsuya put his arms around me and then he picked me up. He carries me all the way back to his house since my mom would kill me if I walked into the house covered in blood and crying. Mitsuya sets me down on a table and starts cleaning me up from the dried blood on my body. When he's done cleaning me he carries me into his room and sets me down into his bed. I fall asleep once my breathing becomes steady.

When I wake up I feel Mitsuya's arms around me and cuddle back. It's pitch dark outside but I can't do anything but remember what had happened earlier. I feel my eyes start to fill up with tears and my breath starts to become uneven but I let it out. Mitsuya wakes up and holds me. We both cry until we can't anymore and fall asleep.

I dream about Baji dying in my arms multiple times but I stop falling asleep since I see his face one more time I might as well take a trip off the building. I drag myself out of the bed and grab my things and walk back to my house. My phone has multiple messages but Mitsuya texted her earlier that I would spnd the night. When I enter my house I hear my mom run over to me. The second I feel her arms around me I start sobbing. Once I start I can't stop, my mom gives me some tissues and I hold them but my body just falls and I lay on the ground as I cry.

"What's wrong?" My mom asks me. I look at her and realize that she doesn't know that he died. I try to answer but I can't breath and let out a sob. She pulls me into her arms and holds me for a while. After a bit my breathing is back to normal and I start from the beginning. I hold back my tears as I explain how he stabbed himself but fail and start sobbing again. I don't normally cry like at all but today I lost something important to me.

If only I could hug him one last time, but I can’t ever do that ever again since he’s now gone. Today is the day I lost the will to live but my friends pushed me to stay alive but trying to live is extremely exhausting.

Two Weeks Later

Today I went to Baji’s grave and brought him his last request. I barely finished half of the yakisoba before I lost it. I then placed the noodles down and cried. Everyone has been upset that he’s gone but I hate that everyone looks at me with pity and sadness. They look at me as if I’m weak and I’m ******* not. I’ve missed the last week of school since my mom doesn’t trust me.

I’m to the point that I want to leave Toman but Mikey won’t let me. He said that then no one would be able to lead the first division. The only person I’ll ever follow other than Baji is Takemichi so I talk to Mikey about.

“Can I go to the Toman meeting at least?” I ask. My mom isn’t allowing me to go since I’ve been a tad bit suicidal. I call Mikey to bring me to the meeting but he declines and says he’s “busy” even though he doesn’t really do anything. I haven’t been able to see Mitsuya since Baji died but I’ll see him today.

“You ready Chifuyu? I’ll be here the entire time got it?” Mitsuya says. I nod and turn to the front and look at everyone. Our gang has grown three times bigger since Vallahala is now under Toman. I take a deep breath and annouce.

“I considered leaving Toman, but our leader stopped me, by telling me. “You want to snuff out the first division’s flame?” Leading the first division is a huge responsibility for me. I talked it out with our leader, for days and days, and arrived at this conclusion. I’m going to name the guy I want to follow! Takemichi Hanagaki! I nominate you as the first division captain!” I take a deep breath and step back from Takemichi to come up.

Takemichi accepts the offer and walks up the stairs and looks at me. I smile but not a fake one but the first real one since I lost Baji. Mitsuya walks up to me and hugs me. I hug back but feel sad again. Mitsuya and I weren’t very close but he was close with Baji so I saw him pretty often. I walk away and fall to my knees and cry again. I have someone to follow but it won’t ever be the same.

Today I’m meeting up with Takemichi and Mitsuya just so we can hang out. Mitsuya rides to my house and I ride with him to Takemichi’s house. We all head out to get some lunch and get some ramen.

“Oh my ******* god Chifuyu! You need to eat something!” Mitsuya shouts. I look at him with shock and roll my eyes.

“It’s not my fault I can’t eat anything. I can’t sleep since every time I close my eyes I see Baji dying inside my ******* arms!” I yell. I grab my things and walk off but hear someone follow me.

“Chifuyu! Come back!” Takemichi yells. Takemichi looks at me with tears in his eyes and grabs my hand. “You need to take care of yourself! I’ll always be here for you!” Takemichi cries. I hug Takemichi and cry in his arms.

“I’m sorry Chifuyu it’s all my fault!” He says. “I could’ve saved him but I couldn’t! I’ll find a way to bring him back I promise!” He cries. I look at him but why would he even say something like that he’s gone.

"I have to go Chifuyu but stay here until Mitsuya comes okay?" He says. I nod and wait as Mitsuya runs to me. Mitsuya then hugs me and cries.

"I'm sorry I couldn't save him but just remember I love you so fudging much!" He says. I look at him and realize how f handsome he is. I ignore the thought of being with him though since I could never love anyone but Baji. I then walk to my motorcycle and get on and ride to my house.

I walk into the house and flop onto my bed and pulled the covers over my head. I felt Mitsuya get in also and he puts his arms around my waist. I then grab some of my mangas and read them with him for the next few hours. After finishing a couple of volumes I get out of bed and make some food. Mitsuya comes from my room and sits on the couch and turns on the tv. After making some ramen I put it into two bowls and give one to Mitsuya. After I give him his ramen he eats it slowly watching me as if I’m going to cry again but I watch the tv and eat my food.

“That was good Chifuyu!” Mitsuya said. I look at him and see he’s smiling brightly at me. I can’t stop but blush at his handsome face.

“Umm thanks, Mitsuya! I normally make it when I’m tired but need to eat!” I say. I carry his bowl out of the room and wash the dishes while he watches the tv. After finishing the dishes I look and see him staring intently at me. "W-why are you looking at me!" I yell. I feel my face heat up and hide my face so he can't see me blushing.

"I was staring at you since I was waiting for you to sit back down," He says. I swear he's going to be the death of me. I walk back to the couch and sit down and exhale. I feel Mitsuya's eyes on me but I can't help but look at him. The second I look at him he smiles at me. "Will you stop staring at me!!" I yell. I feel myself heat up but can't stop but look back at him once more.

"Why? I think you have a nice face! I can't stop myself from staring at you!!' He says. I glare at him and walk to my room. When I hear him follow me I have the urge to hurt him! He looks at me as I flop onto the bed and yell. I wait for him to come over or something but he just stands there like he won't move from the place he's standing from even if someone kills him for it. I then invite him over to sit with me on my bed and he sits down. He looks at me and holds my hand.

"Why are you so affectionate towards me!!" I yell. He looks at me with shock and I look back at him. "Since I've always wanted to be with you!" He answers. I can't help but blush at the words he said. "You really mean it?" I ask. He looks at me and just stares. I know I like him but I can't just move on from Baji. I look at Mitsuya and remove my hand from his.

Then I feel it. I start crying like the day Baji died. I realized that I was starting to love someone else so quickly, I wanted to hurt myself so much for moving on just like that. Mitsuya leaves and I keep on crying. I cry for hours until I hear my house door open. I try to stop myself from crying more but when I see that it isn't my mom but it's Takemichi I let it all out.

"Shh, it's going to be okay Chifuyu," Takemichi whispers in my ear. Takemichi is petting my hair and holding me as I cry but I just want to be alone. "I'm right here okay?" Takemichi says. The thing about Takemichi is that he is there for me more than Mitsuya has ever been.

"Takemichi I'm better now but I just need to avoid Mitsuya!" I say. Takemichi looks at me with confusion and I explain what had happened.

"Chifuyu you shouldn't avoid him though! He's been through just as much as you!" Takemichi says. He looks at me with disappointment but I then tell him about Baji's relationship with him.

"But I was scared that I would move on from Baji so quickly!! I can't just move on like that! I love Mitsuya but it's like telling you to move on from Hina after she dies! I want Baji back so badly!" I yell. I cry but also feel the urge to jump off the roof and meet with Baji again.

"I'm sorry Chifuyu! But like I said you really can't avoid Mitsuya or else he'll be sad!! You do know he's liked you since you joined Toman! I know you joined for Baji but you need to realize that he still loves you even if you love Baji still!! I'm on your side, I know you don't want to move on from Baji but you need to tell Mitsuya you love Baji!" Takemichi yells.