We lay together on the damp grass, staring up at the seemingly infinite star-filled sky, his warm hand enveloped mine.

“You’re beautiful,” he said as he brushed his hand across my cheek which caused a pink blush to tint them. I rolled over so that I was facing him and snuggled against him. He wrapped one of his arms around me and pulled me closer before saying, “I love you. I want to keep you safe, always.”

His words came out as barely a whisper, and if I had not been so focused on him I wouldn’t have heard it. Although he’d been addressing me I wasn’t sure if he’d intended for me to hear it, so I didn’t reply. Instead, I buried my face into his neck and inhaled. I loved the way he smelled; it reminded me of a nighttime rain. Fresh. Cool.

I took another deep breath to inhale his scent and…

I felt someone gently stroke my cheek, an attempt to rouse me into consciousness. When I opened my eyes I thought I saw a silhouette standing above me. No, not really a silhouette; it was more like an ethereal shimmer, vaguely shaped like a person. I blinked and when I opened my eyes again I used my hand to shield them from the sunlight that seeped in through my window. There was nothing out of the ordinary.

Damn, it must have been the beginning of a lucid dream. How did I pull myself out of it? But, more importantly, why? I lamented the loss of skin-to-skin contact I’d just experienced in my half-awake state. Even though it wasn’t real, it felt like it was. It was the first physical contact I’d had in months, as I’d shied away from the world around me, forming an invisible, protective barrier to distance myself from others.

I closed my eyes again and rested one hand on the cheek that had been touched. Him... He’d been in my dreams for about a month now. I didn’t know his name, though it was my mind that created him. I suspected that it was my subconscious way of handling the grief I’d suppressed after my mom’s passing.

I sighed as I heaved myself out of bed and sauntered downstairs in search of my housemate, best friend, and former guardian Kai. Kai is twenty, two years older than me. Our mothers—my mom, Maya Matsunaga, and Kai’s mom, Eri Suzuki—had been best friends forever. No, seriously, they’d been best friends for as long as anyone could remember. As a result of their friendship, Kai and I had grown up living next door to one another and, naturally, we became best friends as well.

Unknown to me, shortly before my mom passed away she had Kai sign documentation that made him my legal guardian until I turned eighteen, which happened a few months ago. Even though I’m legally old enough to be on my own now, Kai told me that I was welcome to stay as long as I’d like, that it wasn’t just his house—it was our home. It was reassuring to know he felt that way.

Kai was sitting at our dining table eating breakfast while reading something on his Galaxy Tab when I found him. Though he couldn’t have woken up that much earlier than me he looked simply modelesque. His midnight black hair was tousled, but it looked as though a professional stylist had done it, and his glasses sat at the tip of his disgustingly perfect nose. Some people, like Kai, were just blessed with great genetics, whereas I struggled to appear human every morning.

The struggle was real and it had only gotten worse in recent months as dark circles had begun to form under my eyes, and my eyelids were perpetually swollen from crying myself to sleep every night. Sigh. It was only thanks to Mr. Dream that my eyelids managed to look normal, with their small crease, on mornings like this one.

“Morning,” I said as I sat across from him.

He looked up at me as he put down the Tab and smiled, a small dimple appearing on his right cheek. “I left some bacon and eggs for you on the stove, if you’re hungry.”

“Thanks,” I said, “but I wanted to talk to you first.”

Kai tilted his head slightly, as he always did when he was curious.

My stomach flip-flopped as I began to speak, hoping that he wouldn’t reject my offer. This was me reaching out, taking the first step toward rebuilding our friendship—the friendship that I had torn down brick by brick by shutting him out. At least that is the way it feels in my heart, I thought as my stomach dropped.

“I was just wondering if you would be willing to go shopping with me today. You know, to help me pick out something to wear to graduation.” Although his expression remained neutral, I could see the delight in his eyes that an effort was being made on my part to connect with him again. I was sure that if it were possible his dark brown eyes would have flashed the colors of the rainbow to express his excitement.

“I’d be happy to,” he paused, his voice taking on a cautious tone when he continued, “…It’s been a long time since we’ve done anything together.”

“Yes,” I agreed, “it has been... And I’m sorry. I’ve been checked out, haven’t I?”

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(Early January) Two months earlier…

“Please talk to me, Vilvian,” Kai said. I heard a soft thump, which I assumed was Kai resting his head on my bedroom door. The door wasn’t locked, but he respected my privacy too much to enter uninvited.

I looked up at the door for a moment and contemplated opening it for him, my best friend. If anyone could empathize with what I was going through, surely it would be Kai. But as the thought registered in my head, my body suddenly felt like it was made of lead and my tongue felt fat. I was incapable of transferring thoughts from my mind to my mouth.

I put my head back down on the pillow, face first. Breathing was difficult, but these days I felt that perhaps life would be easier if I simply didn’t have to live it anymore. I didn’t know how to function like a regular person with this hole in my heart.

Through the door I heard a soft sigh, and what I thought was a sniffle. Kai was probably crying, too. He was probably in as much pain as I was, and yet here I was, shutting him out because all I wanted was to not feel anymore.

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Although I saw him every day, things hadn’t been the same since my mom passed away. Over time I’d made small improvements—eventually, I started to return his smile as we passed each other in the hallway or we would engage in small talk about our respective days during dinner before I politely excused myself to my bedroom to wallow in my smallness. Once Death had touched your life, you realized how small and powerless you really were.

I cared about Kai and was grateful that he took me under his care when he could have turned my mom down, and passed the responsibility on to his parents. But lost in my grief, I’d forgotten how to be around other people. I didn’t want to be around other people. I didn’t see the point of maintaining relationships. In the end, everyone left you in one way or another.

At my best during my worst, I was able to wear a mask that allowed me to get through work, to muddle through forced interactions with people. But at my worst, I realized there was no light in me at all.

Kai smiled at me, and for the first time in a long time, the smile reached his eyes.

“We should go to Heartful first. Hopefully, you’ll find something there since you get an employee discount,” he said.

Heartful was the small but popular and on-trend boutique that I worked at part-time. I had been lucky enough to get the job thanks to Jezabel, the store manager, who was Kai’s classmate. She remembered me being her underclassman in high school, and I remembered her, too. I recalled that she transferred to another school before the end of her senior year.

One day during a slow period at work she shared with me that she had decided to work for a few years after high school instead of going straight to college, much to the disappointment of her first generation Filipino parents who had hoped she would have gone to school for nursing. In the end, it worked out better than she had expected because shortly after she’d started work here, she was surprised to find out that she’d been promoted to store manager. Even though she said she’d been surprised, I wasn’t, and I don’t think anyone else that knew her would be either.

Although she and I hadn’t been more than acquaintances in school, Jez had a reputation for being outgoing and caring. Jez was everyone’s friend; she had a way of automatically connecting with people. Those traits coalesced with the fact that she was an incredibly hard worker made it obvious to anyone with eyes that she was the perfect person for the position.

“I’d planned to—Jez sent me a text yesterday to let me know that she put some dresses on hold that she thought I'd like,” I said with a smile. Jez’s sense of style was on point, and she had a talent for picking out things people would look good in; she should have become a professional personal shopper or stylist, but I suspected that the boutique’s owner paid her more than enough to keep her around.

“I’ll go shower and get ready, but in the meantime why don’t you have your breakfast?” Kai seemed hesitant to leave, to end our conversation. He was probably afraid that I’d clam up again while he was gone, and I didn’t blame him for feeling that way.

“Okay. You can leave your dishes on the table; I’ll re-use them so I don’t have to wash as many dishes later.” I really disliked doing dishes and in my opinion one less set of things to wash made a significant difference. That was why we had the rule—the one rule that mattered in this house: I cook, you clean. I was the one who instated that rule—way before Kai took guardianship of me—because I was usually at his house anyway, and I almost always cooked. However, since Kai had prepared breakfast this morning the dishes would obviously fall under my jurisdiction. Sigh.

“Sure,” he laughed as he reached over and patted the top of my head as he walked past me, heading for the stairs.

“No problem.” I rolled my eyes. It irritated me a bit when Kai pet me but it had become a bit of an inside joke between us since he was five feet ten inches tall and I was a diminutive five feet even. Ten inches might not seem like such a big difference until you were trying to reach something on the top shelf—which was where I was convinced he hid all the good snacks.

As I set my plate down on the table, I picked up Kai’s Galaxy Tab to read through my favorite Asian blogs. I unlocked the screen and discovered that the browser had been left up and he had been searching, ‘how to confess your love to someone.’ Raising an eyebrow, I put the tablet back exactly where it had been. That had been a very unintentional gross invasion of his privacy and I was embarrassed. I felt my face heat up. I rested my head in my hand before I covered my eyes. Maybe it was time for me to buy my own tablet to avoid the risk of any more unexpected discoveries.

I made a mental note to find out if he needed help talking to the girl that he liked. I had to do something to make up for that embarrassing faux pas. But I mean, really, what were best friends for? I’d be his secret wingman and he’d never be the wiser.

Distracted by this new train of thought, I momentarily forgot about Mr. Dream, who inexplicably gave me the strength to carry on.

When we arrived at the store Jez ran over and gave us both a hug—her long, almost butt-length, black hair swished back and forth as she moved. “Viiiillv! I can’t wait for you to try on the dresses I held for you. They’re from the new shipment, so you haven’t seen them yet!” She rubbed her hands together gleefully; her large dark brown eyes sparkled with excitement as she went into the back room and retrieved the dresses. When she returned she hung the dresses in the fitting room and gestured for me to enter.

“Just leave the rejects on the hook. I’ll find a place to put them later,” she said.

After she pulled the curtain closed, I looked through the dresses she’d selected for me. They were very much my style. I put on a short-sleeved white sailor-inspired dress that landed just above my knees. Gathering the skirt in my hands, I couldn’t help but giggle. Kai would love the way I looked in this dress—he was secretly an otaku and a big fan of the Japanese school girl look. I loved this dress but as I reached up and touched the dark blue bow at the neckline I knew it wouldn’t work. I’d need something simpler, something that didn’t put out Lolita vibes for graduation.

I tried on two more dresses before I decided on a short black dress with a sweetheart neckline under a layer of lace that went up into a mandarin collar. I loved this dress almost as much as the first—especially because it hugged my petite frame—but when I glanced at the price tag I knew I could only afford one of them.

“Which dress did you decide on?” Jez asked as she smiled at me, curiosity alight in her eyes.

I held up the black dress for her and Kai to see. “This one,” I smiled as I handed her back the other dresses.

“Are you purchasing the sailor dress too?”

“Oh,” I said unaware that I had held both of them up, one in front of the other. “No, I don’t think so. I can only afford to buy one dress, for now, maybe another time?” I smiled sheepishly.

“Okay,” Jez said, completely unaffected, as she collected both dresses from me and prepared to ring me up for the black dress.

I fumbled with my debit card as I tried to pull it out of my wristlet for what felt like an eternity before finally handing it to Jez so that we could complete the transaction. I hated how my cards stuck together, which sometimes left me looking completely incompetent in front of whoever the cashier was. Thankfully, in this instance, it was just Jez, and I knew she wasn’t the type judge someone over something so little.

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“That went faster than I thought it would. Did you want to have lunch at the mall since we’re already here? My treat,” Kai offered.

“We could go to that new Japanese place—Ichiban—I think it’s called. They opened up last month and I haven’t had the chance to eat there yet. I heard their Japanese curry is the best,” I said, batting my eyelashes comically. I hoped that mentioning Japanese curry would seal the deal because it was one of his favorite foods, and more importantly, it was one of mine, too.

“Okay,” he agreed as we waved goodbye to Jez and left Heartful.

“Oh shoot,” he said as he suddenly patted at his pockets, “I think I dropped my keys back there. Would you mind going on ahead and getting us a seat while I go back and take a look?”

I shook my head to signify that, no, I wouldn’t mind. “It’d be no problem at all.”

Although I wasn’t excited about going to the restaurant alone, I didn’t think it was something worth complaining about so I’d just agreed. After being a recluse for so long it was nice to be out of the house, hanging out with my best friend. I had overheard Kai on the phone with his mom a little while after my mom passed away, and it was pretty apparent that she was worried about me becoming a recluse. I’d heard the word hikikomori thrown around a few times. I realized then that there was a reason people shouldn’t eavesdrop.

The waitress set two cups of hot green tea on the table, as I waited for Kai to arrive. I rested my head on my hands allowing my long black hair to cascade and create a curtain, partially obscuring my view of what was going on outside the restaurant window. As I looked over the menu something in my peripheral vision caught my eye. It looked like… I blinked, and nothing was there.

I lifted my head and stared out the window as I tucked my hair behind my ear. I must have imagined it. He only existed in my dreams, after all. Perhaps I’d been thinking of him, of Mr. Dream, and had been carried away by a daydream. Lost in thought as I stared out the window, I didn’t notice Kai was now sitting across from me, a smile playing on his lips.

“A penny for your thoughts?”

“Some things are better left a mystery,” I said with a sly wink.

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Soon we were on our way home in Kai’s white Corvette Stingray.

“Do you have shoes to match your dress?” Kai asked casually while never taking his eyes off the road.

“I was planning on wearing my nude heels. That way no matter which dress I bought, they would match. Why?”

“Since I don’t work tomorrow or Monday either, I was going to offer to take you shopping again,” he said as we pulled into our garage.

“I work the closing shift tomorrow and Monday, and I don’t need new shoes, but if you don’t have plans tomorrow we could find something to do during the day.”

I held the door that led inside of the house open for him.

“Thanks for coming out with me today,” I said.

“No problem,” he replied as he walked ahead of me. “I had a lot of fun.” He turned back to look at me and winked playfully before ascending the stairs. I hadn’t seen him this happy since—no, I wouldn’t think about it.

It sounded like he was halfway up the stairs when he said, “I’m going to be in my room.

I have to finish working on a client’s website tonight. I promised them it would be live by tomorrow morning.”

Despite living together, spending time with Kai was always a rarity, even before I spiraled into my depression. However, when we did hang out it was always enjoyable. In addition to going to college full-time, he also worked full-time hours at his Dad’s design firm, both remotely and in office. His Dad’s firm was called Bell Tree Designs, which was funny because their surname was Suzuki, and in kanji that read as bell tree in English. There were times he did freelance work on the side as well, but I didn’t know whether those clients were the firm’s or his own.

By the time I reached the top of the stairs his bedroom door was closed, as I had expected it to be. Whenever Kai was working on a big project, he’d close his door. Although I was never sure whether it was so he wouldn’t bother me, I wouldn’t bother him, or perhaps a little of both.

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When I pulled the second dress out of the bag, I knew it was Kai’s doing. I shook my head, grateful and not at all surprised. That guy. Tsk. He was always doing little things to surprise me. Somehow, I'd have to find a way to return the gesture. Like not abandoning him again, my conscience scolded me.

I hung the dresses in my closet and took a minute to appreciate them. Then, not wanting to disturb Kai, I scrawled a quick thank you note and taped it to his door. He would find it when he was done with whatever he was working on and read it at his leisure.

Not knowing what else to do, I resigned myself to start working on my homework. I grabbed my school bag—a designer bag that Kai had bought me for my birthday earlier this year. It was a St. Scott London convertible bag that could be used as a purse or a backpack, which was how I had been using it since I received it. I wasn’t sure if calling such an expensive purchase practical was nonsensical, but I loved it and used it primarily for school. I pulled out my notebook, set it in front of my laptop, and settled into my studies.

About three hours later I was done with my homework and Kai still hadn’t come out of his room, although it was nearly dinner time. I heard the furious clicking of his laptop keys and decided to go ahead and cook dinner. If he didn’t come out of his room by then, I would take a plate up to him.

I decided to make oven chicken after looking in the refrigerator and pantry to see what ingredients we had available. It was something fast and simple that Kai’s mom had taught me to make. I smiled at the memory of Mama, as Kai’s mom liked for me to call her, taking the time to teach me her recipes over the years. She had become extremely zealous about passing her recipes on after I moved in with Kai. In retrospect, she was probably trying to keep both of us busy so that neither of us would get lost in the grief that we never displayed. Her efforts were not for nothing because even though I still withdrew into myself, I now held a plethora of Suzuki family recipes in my head.

As I checked on the progress of the chicken, Kai sauntered into the kitchen.

“I saw the note you left me. I’m surprised you didn’t catch Jez and me throwing glances at each other, trying to communicate silently so you wouldn’t know what we were doing. You are so oblivious,” he laughed.

“I really didn’t know! But I do know Jez well enough to know that she doesn’t do anything by accident.”

“Well, in any case, you’re welcome. Is this your way of thanking me?” He asked as he sniffed the air delicately, “You know I love Mama’s cooking.”

Mama Suzuki had moved back to Japan shortly after my birthday to help her brother and his wife with their newborn twins. She’d always been very nurturing, so from what I gathered no one in their family was surprised when she made the offer. I suspected that she also wanted to get away for a while, to keep busy and away from thoughts of how her best friend had passed away.

Though Kai’s Dad, Takuya, wasn’t entirely enthusiastic about the idea, he agreed to it with the stipulation that she came home before the holidays. He would never hold Mama back from something she really wanted to do, even if it affected him.

Everyone seemed to wilt a little with Mama away. I suspected it must have been extremely tough on Kai, and as I had thought he would be, Kai seemed to be genuinely pleased with the prospect of eating his mom’s cooking, even though it was actually prepared by me.

“It sure is! I’m making oven chicken,” I said. Although it was a simple recipe, she didn’t make it often, only relying on it when she was short on time. It was tasty, and growing up it had been one of Kai’s favorite meals. I had been very glad to see the bag of chicken wings and drumettes in the freezer.

“It’s been awhile,” he smiled.

“It really has,” I replied as I opened the refrigerator and pulled out a jar of takuan. “We have some left over tsukemono from the last time we went grocery shopping, so it’ll really be like your Mama’s here cooking for you.”

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“Hey, Kai...,” I said, suddenly and somewhat randomly.

“Yeah?” He asked, acknowledging me before he shoveled a bite of rice and takuan into his mouth.

“I was wondering, I don’t keep tabs on your love life or anything but in the time I’ve lived with you, you haven’t been on a date.”

I looked down at my plate, too nervous to make eye contact with him for fear that he’d be able to read my face and know that I’d seen the search results on his tablet. When I glanced up tentatively I saw that he was holding his index finger up to indicate that I’d get my answer after he was done chewing.

“I’m too busy to date,” he said simply.

I bit my lip as I tried to think of a way to coerce a name out of him without revealing my earlier gaffe.

“Kai, you’re smart and handsome. As I recall when you were in high school, there were quite a few girls that liked you.”

I looked up, staring directly at him, as I took a moment to assess his good looks. Just two years ago, when we had been in school together, his thick jet black hair had been a little longer and he’d frequently worn circle lens contacts that Mama would buy for him whenever she went to Japan. Nowadays he almost never wore contacts, instead opting for glasses with a smart black frame, and often styled his messy black hair in a way that reminded me a bit of K-pop star, Lay, from the group EXO.

Maybe that’s what his goal was, I thought. After all, we used to spend a lot of time listening to J-pop, K-pop, and Mando-pop back when things were different before my grief had settled deep into my bones. My mom always thought it was a little weird that Kai and I listened to K-pop and Mando-pop even though we didn’t understand it, but she always supported it nonetheless. The thought made me smile.

“None of them,” he paused, probably thrown off by my sudden smile, “I mean, no one—from school or work—has ever interested me in that way.”

“Oh,” was all I said in reply.

“What made you think about this so suddenly?” His eyes narrowed into suspicious lines.

“Nothing, really, I just thought that you could use some fun in your life, Mr. Workaholic.”

He rolled his eyes at me. “Vilv, between work and college, worrying about you is all the fun I can handle right now.”

Heart pain.

I put my hands in the air to signify defeat. “Okay, I get it. You’re really, really busy. But if you do like someone, I’d be happy to aid in the process of getting you two together,” I said with a wink.

“Thanks, I suppose,” he said with an exasperated sigh before returning to his meal.

“You’re welcome, bestie,” I winked again, even though it was superfluous because I thought it would make him smile. I was right.

“Vilv,” he said, a smile still spread across his face, “I just want you to know I had fun with you today.”

Kai’s smile made me happy, but it broke my heart that I had been the one to rob him of it for so many months.

When I awoke I found myself lying on the beach, a pair of shimmering gray eyes staring at me.

I was dreaming again.

“I missed you while you were gone,” he said, as he stood over me and extended an arm out to me to help me up.

I used his arm to pull myself up into the sitting position and patted the sandy ground next to me, to indicate that he should sit as well.

“I missed you, too,” I said hesitantly, as I leaned my head onto his shoulder and stared out at the waves as they crashed onto the shore. I felt his body tense as he heard the hesitation in my voice.

“You’ve never said that to me before. We’ve never had a real conversation, it’s usually me talking and you listening...,” I trailed off.

“Last night was the first night you didn’t cry.” He reached for my hand and held it. “I gave you the listening ear and open heart you needed to help you grieve. I held you as you sobbed. Being close to you is enough for me—it always has been since I began to exist.” His thumb gently caressed my hand as he spoke.

“I’ve never even asked your name...”

“You haven’t given me one,” he said softly.

I lifted my head up to look at him. My eyes traced his handsome features. His dark brown, almost black, hair was perfectly coiffed and pushed back out of his face, which made the task of admiring him easy.

“I have to give you a name?” My voice sounded as incredulous as I felt. He turned to look at me, his gray eyes locking onto mine.

“I began to exist because you needed me. You longed for a companion, someone you could trust with your darkest secrets and your weakest moments—someone who could love you, not despite your flaws, but because of them. You made a wish... and I began to exist.”

I closed my eyes as I tried to remember. I started to dream of him several weeks ago when I had been feeling at my lowest, as I did my best to avoid dealing with my grief. I tried to hide it, to repress it. I was too ashamed to let anyone see me cry. I held myself together because I hadn’t wanted to burden anyone with all of my feelings. I’d folded myself, my real self, up like a piece of origami and tucked it behind the proverbial mask I wore every day.

“I felt lost,” I said, and as I did the words felt heavy on my tongue.

“Because you were sad,” he said.

“Once I was done folding I made a wish on the jar of origami stars. I folded them every day after my mom died—sometimes folding one a day, other times more depending on how I felt. When I reached three hundred and sixty-five stars I made a wish.”

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(Mid-January) A month and a half ago…

I sat at my desk, opening the box the mailman had left on our doorstep. The package had been addressed to me, with no return address. I was curious because I hadn’t ordered anything online.

I opened the package and found a Hermes jar and several packages of beautiful glittery origami paper strips, meant to be folded into lucky stars. I gasped, overwhelmed by nostalgia.

When Mom was first diagnosed last year, we spent hundreds of hours folding origami cranes and lucky stars together, to wish for an improvement in her health. We knew that it was silly but it was hope that kept us on task. When she died I threw them all away. Kai must have bought this for me as a way to show me that I should never give up, to not give up hope that things would get better.

I closed my eyes and imagined the first time she taught me how to fold a lucky star. I was twelve.

“Mom, I can’t do it,” I said in frustration as I threw the mangled strips of origami paper away. “I’ll never be able to fold a star.” I frowned.

She smiled patiently at me. “You can’t give up so easily. If you really want to learn how to do this, you need to keep practicing. I believe in you,” she said as she showed me how to fold a star again.

It had taken me days and what seemed like hundreds of strips of paper but in the end, I had been able to fold my first lopsided star, all because she believed in me.

I opened the first packet of paper and started folding. Maybe someday I’d be able to hope again…

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“That night you dreamt of me for the first time,” he said as he caressed my hand.

Against my will, I felt tears well up in my eyes. But they weren’t tears of sadness… I was happy to know that, at least in my dreams, I would never feel alone again.

“What about Nox?”

His brow furrowed in confusion. “Nox?”

“For your name,” I explained, “It means ‘night’ in Latin.” I had first seen the word in one of the Harry Potter books, and it had always stuck with me.

He reached up to wipe away my tears. “Nox,” he mused. “What an appropriate name you’ve chosen for me, my Hikari,” he said, calling me by my Japanese name which meant ‘light’.

“My Hikari,” he repeated.

“I heard what you said last night, but I-I didn’t acknowledge it because I didn’t know if you’d meant for me to hear it.” Even though I hadn’t replied out loud I knew, in my heart, that I loved him too.

Nox didn’t say anything in reply. Instead, he leaned toward me and crushed his lips against mine, and for the first time ever we kissed. But it felt like so much more than a kiss. There was something primal and raw behind it. The kiss caused an electrical surge, a shock, to go through my body. It was wonderful. I felt different, as though something had awoken inside of me.

It was my heart.

My heart had felt devoid of all the sorrow I’d been carrying, all of my pain and my grief. I felt lighter, secure but most of all I felt cherished in a way that I never had before. I saw now that there was light at the end of the tunnel.

Nox’s love gave me hope.

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Nox and I sat together, watching the sun rise over the horizon.

“I want to live in this moment forever,” I said with a sigh. A sort of whimsical happiness filled my heart as I spoke.

Nox smirked boyishly at me, which only served to emphasize his impossibly deep and adorable dimples. “If we did just think of the infinite moments we’d miss out on, all the missed opportunities to get to know each other better because we chose to remain frozen in a single moment.”

He was so cute when he smiled like that. It made my tummy butterflies do loop-the-loops.

Nox was right. Why would I want to live forever in one moment when we had so many more wonderful moments ahead of us? I shook my head at the impulsiveness of my words and smiled.

“You’re right, but you can’t blame me for wanting to re-live the night I had the world’s best first kiss over and over,” I said with a pause, then added, “not to mention, watching the sunrise together. It’s all so romantic.”

He squeezed my hand. “No, I certainly couldn’t,” he said as he leaned over to kiss me once more. “I love you, more than anything. All I want is for you to be happy, always.”

It felt like my heart had started beating, really beating, again for the first time in months.