For some, death is a scary thing, but for me, death is freedom. I still remember the first time I was diagnosed with an incurable disease. With how sensitive I've been since childhood, I find it hard to get used to the smell of hospitals, but I'm now 25 and I'm proud that I've managed. I've been treated by doctors since I graduated from university. I have a good life. supportive and understanding parents, cool friends... But of course, I feel like there's still something I want to accomplish.

"Azh..."

*sounds of knife cutting an apple*

"What do you want to do when you reborn into a much healthy body?".

I paused reading, put down my book then smiled. "I want to try doing things that I couldn't do before...eating ice cream while enjoying the fresh breeze outside with my family...sports, painting, biking, partying...you name it! I want to do all of it"

*cough, cough, cough*

"I would also like to be an author and write books like this", chuckling as I told him my dreams while pointing the book I was reading.

"Also...to fall in love...and marry someone..."

But no matter how beautiful would that be, it was all nothing but a wishful thinking, a permanent daydream. On the Summer season of April 20XX, I died.

~*~*~*~*~

"Augh! What the- I thought I died? Where is this pla-" *Gasp* As I looked down, I found myself in a bed with a stranger. She was laying her half upper body beside me while sitting in a wooden chair and holding my hands as if she was waiting for me to wake up. I froze in shock as I was processing the current scene.

"Ummm, good morning?" I blinked as she sleepily greeted me.

I stayed quiet for a minute and I'm still not coming to my senses "Excuse me? Is this how people enter the gates of heaven?"

"Heaven? Pfft~ Haha Sorry, you're just so- Your wound is right on your arm and not on your head, right? Did the poison affect your head too? What's wrong with you?"

She was really laughing hard but I'm not surprisingly annoyed. I was still focusing on what's happening when she flicked off her finger on my forehead.

"Also, since when did you call me miss? I'm your elder sister, dummy. Don't treat me like a stranger"

"Sister? Who? I-I don't have a sister, "

She gave me a grimace before I could even say anything else. "Those scoundrels, sh*t!"

I have no idea why, but she seemed really disturbed.

"Wait here, I'll get father and the physician"

She glared at thin air and left the room, leaving me with a lot of unanswered questions. "They really crossed the line this time," she said.

My entire body is numb and I can hardly feel my arms as I try to collect myself and reach for a cup of water from the right side table then-

*shatter*

...~tbc~...

"The stars... they're so... pretty..."

Arial kept crying as she felt very weak and helpless looking at Ashlan.

"Stop talking nonsense! The Saintess is almost here! Ju-just hang in there! I can't lose you! Not now!"

"How come there are so many stars every single night...I kept dreaming of having one, but it fatefully never was, and never will be mine"

My heart no longer felt as if it belonged to me. It now felt as it had been stolen, torn from my chest by someone who wanted no part of it. But still, till my very last breath, if there's another life beyond this, I hope that you can finally choose me. I'll wait.

As tears continued to stream down his pale-looking face, he spoke his parting words to Arial.

Now, the love that last longest is the love that is never returned >

"Wha-what?!? That's it?? She doesn't even care if you die? Hayyshh! Why risk your life for someone who doesn't even love you back? I hope the Female Lead would just stop using this innocent people just to protect herself! Even the male lead is one of them! tssk, author's one crazy biscuit..."

*Throws the book at the edge of his bed*

"Azh, if you don't want to read this kind of book why don't you just throw it? or give it to the patient next door? I heard he's also a bookworm like you"

*Crawling to the end side of his bed to get the book back*

"No! It's just that...I think the author has a pretty messed up life. Innocent characters are dying, leaving the manipulative one on each surface of the pages. If I become an author myself, I'll make sure that none of my characters will suffer, only those who deserves it"

" Azh..."

"There are times where you can turn every pages inside a book, read them, then *BAAM!* Close them! Now, go to sleep, you aren't allowed to stay up late remember?"

~*~*~*~*~

*Huff, hah, huff

"Those dreams again..."

*sigh~

It's been two weeks since I've collapsed and I'm still...well, confined in my bed prohibited to leave..

~*flashback*~

*glass shatter*

"Young Duke! What hap- Ahh!! your bleeding! Call the physician!", a man wearing a suit of high quality and a monocle suddenly screamed at his subordinates.

"Ah...Oh! I'm bleeding?", well, I'm not really surprised to see blood anymore and my pain tolerance improved a lot since I've been practically living in the hospital in my last life.

*Clamouring*

"Duke Arthsden and Lady Esther has come!"

I flinched from surprise as heard those oddly familiar names.

All servants bowed their heads respectfully at the seemingly two important figure in the household...One of them is the person who claims to be my sister earlier.

Behind all my confusion, one thing's I know for sure now....

"This. is. not. heaven",I uttered as I drooped my head looking gloomy...

*Step, step*

An old man with a noble stature rapidly walked and stood in front of me. He held my bleeding right hands and tore a piece of cloth from his suit that's obviously from a high quality fabric. He calmly wrapped my hands well, then....

"Heaven? Est what happened here?"

Est? Those names were very familiar.

"Ummm....Father it's a long story but I'll tell you later after we skip this scenario okay?...Sebastian, please escort everyone out, leave us"

Sebastian?just where did I hear these names?

"Yes, My lady...Everyone, come along"

"Ashlan", a deep and soothing voice coming from the very old man who treated my bleeding hand.

---Snap---

Right! it all make sense now.

"Be honest! I know you're at your age where you wanted to be as rebellious and wild as you can be..."

This is-

"Your mother was quite a rebel too, you know. You're 15 years old now and it's hard for you to grow up without her and I know and felt that pain..."

THIS IS THE--

"But please! Stop causing me more problems...Be honest! Did you really risk your life just to see the daughter of that scandalous Baron?"

IM INSIDE THE "THE SHIELDS OF QUEEN"!!! And Im--

"Ashlan! Are you listening?"

Ashlan!?! The second male lead that'll eventually die just for Arial?!?!

*Deep Breaths*

*Thud!*

~*end of flashback*~

"My last life...I hope Brother Yuu is doing fine...Well! I know that he will be doing fine... Wherever he is, I know that he's hoping for me to be happy as well"

"So, what now? Surely, the novel will change now that I've replaced Ashlan...plus, I can't do anything now that his soul has vanished".

Boredom strikes again as I unconsciously stared at the ceiling.

*sigh*

I walked towards the mirror near my bed and observed every single detail I've read about him.

I had to say...Ashlan is so dashing in real life... I guess being the second male lead has its own perks...

"Augh! I've always wanted a taste liberty but who knew liberty with no goals are so boring! I guess I just have to make one"

*tic toc tic toc tic toc*

"I wish I could talk to the original "him". I wanted to tell him to avoid that snake lady...and there's the Main male lead too."

Right! The main male lead!

......~tbc~......