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I'm No Summoned Devil

Devil summoning? Fail!

"F**K IT! Work it yourself\, you fat son of a b*tch! You want me to be that brat's stuntman double? Why don't I stuntman my fist into his brain for you as well!" A young man with short red hair roared at a middle-aged fat man behind a desk.

The fat man stared back at the young man and frowned

"You don't want to work? Fine, you're fired!" He shouted as he slammed his hand against the table

The young man lifted a brow

"Fired? That's great! Your business is failing anyway, I'll be damned, if you can live past the next year without starving after I leave, I'll even beg you to let me back in" The young man smirked and turned around

The fat man paused, he suddenly began sweating

"W-Wait, Hou Tian, let's talk it through, I'm doing this for your own good, I just said that earlier in a fit of anger, how about we be civil and sit down" The fat man rubbed his sweat fingers together as he smiled.

The young man, named Hou Tian, turned back and smiled

"Oh, my dear boss, I only have two words for you...get f**ked" He grinned from ear to ear as he turned his head and walked out the office.

The fat man trembled, he almost fell off his chair

"Someone stop him! Grab him!" He shouted

The bodyguards by the side immediately ran at Hou Tian, attempting to grab him and pin him down to the ground. But once they reached him, Hou Tian turned his body and grabbed them by their heads, then slammed it together.

*Bang*

A loud sound rang out, and the two bodyguards collapsed

"My dear boss, oh, no, ex-boss, did you forget, in order to be that brat's stuntman for the past four years, I've trained in boxing, Muay Thai, judo, karate, taekwondo and fencing, your little bodyguards can't touch me" He smiled and left.

Hou Tian's laughter then rang out the hall as he left, making the fat man sweat profoundly.

"Doomed, where else can I find a treasure like him! I'm a fool, I wasted such a good treasure!" He cried out, but there are no pills for regret in this world.

After leaving the building, Hou Tian headed for the cemetery, there, he stopped in front of a tombstone and knelt down. In his hand was a small flower that he placed on it. He slowly stroked the cold stone, almost wanting to embrace it.

"Fei'er, brother is here again, let me tell you, I finally got to leave that black company, had he not fired me, I would never have been able to leave, a dumb pig like him, I just needed to anger him a little" Hou Tian smiled brightly as he started to wipe the tombstone.

Hou Tian cleaned it with water and wiped it with a towel.

"Don't worry sis, I'll definitely be able to make a living" Hou Tian smiled, after cleaning it, he leaned down and kissed the tombstone gently, his eyes filled with warmth.

"I'll be going now, I'll visit ag-urgh" Hou Tian suddenly felt a heart-wrenching pain in his chest, he clutched his chest tightly as his pupils shrunk.

He saw his vision blur and his world spin.

"Wh-What the f**k..." He muttered before he lost conscious...

As for the reason of his collapse, we will need to go back ten minutes, in a place very far away...a different world.

Inside a large palace, a young man with long red hair and a flame birthmark on his forehead walked out of his room, wearing a golden robe and wide smile. His eyes laced with a trace of craziness as he held a small book in his hand.

"I can feel it, I'm almost there" He muttered as he stepped out of the palace ground and into the gardens. In this world, the time was still night, he snuck out for this very moment.

With the moon at the peak, he opened the book and drew out a circle with a strange pattern in it.

"I call thy slumbering beast, devourer of souls, awakener of hearts, to come forth upon me, and be at my beck and call, with my blood as tribute, enter the tribute, oh great devil!" He laughed as he dripped his blood down on the pre-drawn circle.

He laughed hysterically, but then, he thought back on his words

"Wait, tribute? F**k, I forgot the tr-urgh!" The young man clutched his chest and collapsed on the circle

....

Well, that's what happened, and the ritual he chanted, due to the lack of energy, fundamentally called Qi in this world, it went off course, so instead of bringing a devil, it...was directed to somewhere else...

So it shot through the spacial barriers, ripping through time and space itself, soon, reaching the young man who was kneeling in front of a tombstone...

The next day...

"Gah!" The red haired young man shot up and opened his eyes, he looked around

Sweat was rolling down his face, and before he could even wonder about anything, a sharp pain penetrated his head as unknown memories entered his head.

"AH!" He clutched his head and screamed

After a while, the pain declined, but it left an annoying headache for him...

"I...what the actual f**k! That dumba*s! He actually f**ked up such a simple ritual! And why the f**k am I the one that got pulled in! I'm not a f**king devil!" Yep\, Hou Tian's soul was sucked in and transferred into this body.

"Hah" Hou Tian panted heavily as he grabbed a mirror beside him.

He quickly checked his face

"Th-This is what I look like now? I-It's so...f**king ugly! My original appearance was ten times more attractive\, what's with that powdered face and...oh\, it's makeup...f**k\, I better not look like a pig below it" Hou Tian gasped\, he quickly tapped his head and tried to remember what this body looks like.

After a while...

"Hm? Not bad, he's at least half my previous handsomeness, this, I can still work with, but what's with all this extra makeup?" He muttered

He tapped his head a few more times, trying to get a hold of everything he could...

After a bit, he opened his eyes and began sweating

'F**k\, so this brat not only f**ked up a simple ritual\, he's a complete lunatic as well\, not only that\, he's a damned prince? The fourth prince to be exact\, and his pampered by his father\, but his brothers often bully him\, saying he looks ugly and such...' He then stared at the mirror

"This fool...he actually believed them and wore such terrible makeup, his three brothers then began treating him better, but only on the surface, they actually bullied him and pretended it was all a joke, and this fool still believed him, damn, just how unlucky am I" He cursed and scratched his head

He then realised that he was inside the prince's room, he looked around and rubbed his chin.

'It's a different world alright, these designs are incredibly delicate and beautiful' He thought to himself, as he compared them to the props used in his acting career.

*Clang*

The door suddenly opened as a man ran in

"Wah, my Tian'er, daddy shouldn't have gotten you that book, don't go doing such strange things again" This man is the original body's father, the emperor of the nation, Hou Dan Di.

'At least my name's the same' Hou Tian thought to himself, feeling relieved.

"Father, I know I'm close, I'll be able to cultivate if I follow the book" Hou Tian's face lit up as he waved his hand around

Hou Dan Di stared at his son as his face twisted with grief

"My poor boy, daddy will definitely cure your disease, then, you can be a normal child" He rubbed Hou Tian's head and kissed his forehead.

He stood up slowly

"Servants! Get my fourth son cleaned up!" He roared

Immediately, almost a dozen maids came in, they grabbed Hou Tian and pulled him to the bath house.

Hou Tian's eyes flashed with a strange glint, and a sense of relief

'Thank goodness I acted quick and got a hold of the original body's personality down pat, who knew my acting skills would save my life in another world' Hou Tian thought to himself

The fourth prince's mother

As he got dragged into the bath, Hou Tian suddenly felt embarrassed as the maids started to remove his clothes and wanted to help him bath. His brain started to run, as he began thinking of ways to escape such humiliation.

"No lookie, no lookie, father's book said th-that if I'm seen *****, I-I'll get pregnant" Hou Tian waved his arms around to stop the maids from taking off his clothes.

"...." The maids all fell silent with a sense of awkwardness

'S-So his majesty...is into those types of things?' They all wondered

As for Hou Tian, he played the fool with his innocent gaze

The maids stared at him for a moment

"But your highness, his majesty told us to wash you properly, if we don't, we'll-"

"I don't wanna! I don't wanna be pregnant!" Hou Tian shouted and started to throw a tantrum

The maids all felt helpless in this matter

"Y-Your highness, you won't get pregnant, that book is fake" One of the maids said

Hou Tian's tantrum however, didn't end there

"No, father said it's real, he said it's serious business, father won't lie to me" He shouted

'Sorry father, but only this way, can I preserve my dignity as a man...thank you for taking the fall' Hou Tian thanked and apologized to Hou Dan Di in his mind as he acted like a spoiled brat.

The maids fell into a deep dilemma, they couldn't disobey Hou Tian, but at the same time, if they did listen to him, they'd be punished by the emperor! And that usually ends in death!

"Let him bath alone" Suddenly, a deep voice came from the side

The maids all bowed

"Greetings, your majesty"

Hou Dan Di walked out from behind, shocking Hou Tian

'F**k! Why is he here now! Then wouldn't I be caught, he'll know I'm not his real son!' He began panicking

Hou Dan Di waved for the maids to leave, his expression was extremely dark as he walked closer to Hou Tian, who was seated on the ground due to his tantrum earlier.

'F**k f**k f**k' He cursed over and over again as Hou Dan Di stepped closer

As he drew closer, Hou Tian's heart started to beat quicker

"You..." Hou Dan Di narrowed his gaze in on Hou Tian

Suddenly, he covered his face

"Don't tell your mother I was reading those things, I don't know how you found them, but don't go through daddy's stuff anymore" He said shyly as he blushed red

"...."

Hou Tian was stupefied

'F**k! The emperor is actually into those things!' Hou Tian cursed in his head.

"Don't worry father, I can clean myself properly! Mother won't suspect that I didn't let others wash me" Hou Tian acted dumb and nodded his head, replying with a strange response that had almost nothing to do with Hou Dan Di's request.

However, it seemed to have made him relieved as he smiled

"Good, it's our promise, a promise between men" He said

"Yes, men! I'm a big man!" Hou Tian said proudly as he grinned

Hou Dan Di rubbed his head and walked out. Once he left, his smile faded as grief filled his eyes.

"My Tian'er...as the emperor, I've been known as a great hero and ruler, yet I can't even cure you of your disease, daddy will definitely let you live like a normal boy" He wiped his tears and reverted back to his stern expression.

Hou Tian who was now alone in the large bath house slowly removed his clothes and walked towards the large body of water. When his feet entered the warm water, he felt a relaxing feeling surge into his body.

"As expected of the royal family, although the fourth prince, I, cannot cultivate due to the lunacy, they still treat him so well" He sat down in the water that reached up to his neck.

He splashed some water onto his face as he began washing his face and hair. Once the thick makeup on his face was washed away, Hou Tian glanced at the reflection in the water and smiled.

"A little thin, but once I fatten up a little, I'll probably return to around seventy percent of my past world's handsomeness" Hou Tian grinned as he stroked his chin, his narcissism reached almost the high heavens itself.

He cleansed his body and got out of the bath, after drying himself and switching into a new set of clothes, he finally felt energized and much more clean. The previous thick makeup really made him feel uncomfortable.

When he stepped out, the maids that greeted him all froze as they stared at him and gasped. As if they have seen something amazing, they all stared at him, some even blushed.

"Wah, don't look, don't look, third brother said I'm very ugly, don't look at my face" Hou Tian covered his face and spoke in a childish manner.

The maids immediately snapped out of their stupor

"Alas, the fourth prince is such a stunner, yet he's a fool" The maids all muttered under their breath, feeling a pity that such a handsome man is a complete lunatic.

"Your highness, please allow us to keep you company" The maids bowed and said reverently

Hou Tian stared at them

"Th-This, th-then get me a mask, third brother said I shouldn't show my face around, or I'll scare people away" Hou Tian said, seemingly having a very low self-esteem.

The maids bowed, one of them left to get a mask, while the remaining three stayed to watch over him. Honestly, having been in the entertainment industry for so long, he didn't feel strange that these people were acting this way, to him, the whole world is a stage, all a play.

As long as he maintains this thought, then he won't even have trouble if his father asked him to buy a slave or order people around.

Soon, the maid came back and handed the mask to Hou Tian, who was still covering his face with his sleeves, it honestly made the maids sigh with how much he believed his third brother. They knew he bullied the fourth prince, but none of them could do anything about it.

Wearing the mask that covered the top half of his face, Hou Tian smiled innocently.

"I wanna go outside and play" He said childishly

The maids all nodded and bowed to show their obedience.

With that, Hou Tian laughed as he skipped towards the entrance of the palace. However, before he could make it through the gate, he felt a sudden coldness that made his heart skip a beat. When he turned to the side...he saw a woman.

The woman had an otherworldly aura around her, her gaze was indifferent and tranquil, however, it carried a cold glint that made Hou Tian shiver inexplicably.

He gulped

'Act natural...I'm the fourth prince...' He thought to himself as a dumb smile appeared on his face, he waved his hands at the woman.

"Mother, mother, are you going out with me as well?" He called out naively

Yes, the woman was Hou Tian's mother, Xiang Mei, as well as the empress of this nation.

'With such a scary background, he actually still gets bullied...but then again, his third and second brother are both sons of concubines, while his first brother, who is his real older brother, ignores him as if he's the scum of the earth' Hou Tian sighed in his heart.

The woman revealed a smile that made the whole world seem colorless, with only her smile as the color that blooms the world.

"Silly Tian'er, mother can't leave the palace easily, but if you're going out, at least bring a few guards, I heard from your father that you collapsed earlier...mind telling me what that's about?" She smiled, but that smile bade Hou Tian tremble...she's definitely angry!

But he maintained his dumb smile

"Yes, I felt that I can cultivate if I follow the book, third brother said it himself so I asked father to buy it for me" Hou Tian said as he jumped around.

Xiang Mei sighed as she stroked Hou Tian's head, her long red hair is one of the few traits that Hou Tian has in common with her. His sharp eyes came from his father, his beautiful red eyes came from her, and his facial features, they were from his father.

"Tian'er...mommy will definitely find a way for you to cultivate, so don't listen to what your third brother says, okay?" She smiled and asked

Hou Tian looked up at her, he felt warm in his heart

"But third brother is third brother, h-how can I reject his offers? Third brother says it's for my own good" He asked innocently, his eyes glimmering with the word "naivety".

His mother stroked is hair

"Just say I told you to reject him, alright?" She replied

"Okay" Hou Tian grinned

The maids by the side all sighed deeply, all feeling bad that the fourth prince is like this. He is already sixteen, yet he still acts like a child.

"Tian'er, what's with that mask?" Xiang Mei asked as she touched Hou Tian's face.

"Third brother said I'm very ugly, so he told me to cover my face with make up to make me look prettier, but the powder was itchy, so I switched it to a mask" Hou Tian replied as he smiled dumbly

"I see...but Tian'er, you're very handsome, you don't need to hide your face" She said bitterly, since young, Hou Tian has listened to his third brother, so even the public believes he's a hideous monster.

Only a few people in the palace knows what Hou Tian truly looks like, and the maids never dare to gossip in front of the members of the royal family, thus, very little news about Hou Tian's appearance spread.

Soup

Hou Tian frantically waved his hand as he covered his face, his mother tried to take off his mask but Hou Tian almost cried as he stopped her.

"D-Don't look, no looking! I can't show my face like that" He said desperately

His words made Xiang Mei almost cry, how can she bear to watch her own son say such a thing about himself? It was heartbreaking. Her beautiful face seems to have lost a trace of the previous color as she gently touched his face.

"Tian'er..." She wiped her eyes and turned around

"I assigned some guards for you, be careful when you're outside" She said

Immediately, Hou Tian's face lit up

"Thank you mother, next time, let's go eat outside together" He waved and ran out the palace gates, in which caused the guards and maids to chase after him.

Her mother watched Hou Tian rub off with a bitter smile

"Tian'er..."

After leaving the palace ground, Hou Tian slowed down to let his guards and maids catch up, even if he's known as a lunatic prince by the public, his father still dotes on him, so kidnapping is still very possible. When they all gathered, Hou Tian ran around, observing the place under the pretense of 'playing'.

"Wah, boss, I want a tanghulu" Hou Tian smiled and called out childishly as he placed a gold coin on the table.

The man selling tanghulus began sweating profoundly as he stared at the gold coin.

"S-Sir, th-this is too much" He waved his hands and said

Hou Tian paused, he placed a finger in his mouth

"Too much? What's too much?" He looked so naive people wondered if he was just a kid who looks older than he is, but the maids caught up and gave the man the proper amount before giving Hou Tian the tanghulu.

"Your high-young master, you can't run around like this" She said helplessly

Hou Tian smiled brightly as he took a bite out of the tanghulu

"So sweet" He said childishly as he began looking around some more

'From the memory of the original body...there's more delicious things down this street' Hou Tian enjoyed himself as he traveled around, memorizing the streets and every possible turns he walked down.

After a few hours, he memorized almost every street in the city, and was panting at this point, sweat was rolling down his face.

'This body is seriously weak, I barely even did much and it's already tired' Hou Tian cursed as he wiped his sweat

"Young master, let's get back before it gets dark" A guard said worryingly

Hou Tian nodded

"Okay, okay, I'm tired, I wanna go back" He smiled and jumped around

'Are you really tired?' The guards and maids were all sweating beads of sweat at this moment, yet Hou Tian is still jumping around.

But this is all thanks to the endurance he built up in his acting career, after all, endurance is incredibly important for an actor.

On the way back, Hou Tian realised the guards and maids were all pale from following him around for hours.

'Are they really my guards?' He wondered and shook his head

By the time he got back to the palace, the sky was dark. The first thing he did when he got back was take a quick bath and dismissed all the maids. Inside his own room, he locked the door and removed his clothes.

"This body is too out of proportion, too thin actually, as if someone is intentionally starving him...but he's the emperor's son, who would dare to sta-...ah right, the three sh*ty brothers" He rubbed his chin as he observed hos body.

"Alright, I need to set a proper plan for this body, or it won't be able to last" He muttered and wrote down a long list of required exercises and dieting plans.

As an actor, maintaining a proper body is like a lifeline, so he had no problem coming up with on immediately after checking his own body's condition. So from this point of, for the next week, Hou Tian spent time in his room doing various exercises.

As for food, he would use the excuse of playing outside, to buy various snacks, but secretly, buys a few herbs and food that matches his requirements. Though he had to spend a good few days of that week looking through books in order to find the right herbs.

Otherwise, everything was going according to his plan.

"Is it because this is a different world?" Hou Tian muttered as he stared at his own body through the mirror, compared to the thin body from before, it was much more well proportioned.

Though he can't be considered masculine, it was much healthier looking.

He wore his golden robe and opened up his door. He decided to spend some time relaxing in the garden, but relaxation is the last thing he found there.

As he was walking by the flowers and peach trees, he heard an obnoxious voice from behind him

"If it isn't my dear fourth brother, I've been looking for you for the past few days" This voice may not be familiar to Hou Tian, but to the body's original owner, it was more than familiar.

Hou Tian turned around with a bright smile

"Third brother, did you come to play with me today?" Hou Tian asked with a wide smile

Seeing Hou Tian so excited, the young man that arrived smiled, however, it was one filled with malice and evil intent.

'This little fool, always so happy to meet me' He laughed in his heart

He lifted a small basket, in which exerted a foul smell.

"I brought you some soup, it's very good for your body, so you should drink it before it gets cold" He said with a smile.

Hou Tian's eyes shone brightly, but his nose felt as if it was going to fall.

'F**k\, how is he still smiling with such a disgusting smell lingering from that basket\, is he not scared that people mistaken it for sh*t?' He thought to himself

"Really? Third brother treats me the best" Despite what he was thinking at the moment, Hou Tian replied with a cheerful smile.

The third prince smiled

"Of course, I, Hou Qing, am very generous" He said with a condescending smile s he took out the bowl of soup.

When he held it towards Hou Tian, Hou Tian walked over, reaching both his hands out, however, before he reached out, his legs tripped over one another as he fell forward. His hands flailing as he fell forward and...

*crash*

The bowl in Hou Qing's hand went flying back, landing cleanly on his head as the disgusting, pungent smell covered him completely.

"Ah! Third brother! I'm sorry, I tripped, let me clean you up" Hou Tian cried, his face filled with panic and grief as he pulled out a handkerchief and wiped Hou Qing's face with it.

However, instead of cleaning it, the handkerchief started to spread the 'soup' over Hou Qing's face and clothes.

"Get off me!" Hou Qing roared as he pushed Hou Tian away

The disgusting smell lingering on him reached his own nose, making him want to puke, but he held it in as he glared at Hou Tian. Meeting his gaze, Hou Tian trembled.

"I-I'm sorry third brother, I-I'll go get water for you" He said as he turned, but Hou Qing grabbed him.

"How dare a filthy b*stard like you dirty me!" He roared as he pushed Hou Tian to the ground and kicked him, he stomped on Hou Tian's body ruthlessly.

"Wah, third brother, I'm sorry, stop hitting me, I'm sorry" Hou Tian covered his head and cried

'F**k, when are they coming' Hou Tian cursed in his head

Just as he was wondering this, sounds of footsteps resounded across the garden, but it was covered by Hou Tian's cries for forgiveness.

"Tian'er! You b*stard of a son, how dare you hit your own brother!" A stern roar came from the garden's entrance.

When this voice rang out, Hou Qing froze completely

"F-Father" He turned around, but what he received was a heavy smack on his cheeks, which sent him flying almost a dozen meters away.

'Holy f**k\, even Br*ce L*e and J*acky Ch*n will be beaten to death by Hou Dan Di' Hou Tian gasped at the strength shown.

'This cultivation world is insane' He thought deeply, as his desire to cultivate suddenly increased.

[Ding]

[Ding]

[Ding]

[Requirements met]

[Initializing system]

'Huh?'

Hou Tian heard a sweet voice ring in his head

[System starting in 1 hour]

Hou Tian was left perplexed, but now wasn't the time to think of such things.

"Tian'er, are you alright?" Hou Dan Di held Hou Tian in his arms as he asked

Hou Tian looked over

"F-Father? F-Father...th-third brother hates me, I-I committed a sin, I dirtied third brother with the soup he wanted to give me" Hou Tian's eyes watered as he cried

Hou Dan Di was stunned, he turned to Hou Qing who was crawling up

'Soup? You call that soup? That thing can't even be called sh*t!' Hou Dan Di's angry voice roared in his own heart, he pitied his fourth son who can't even differentiate between malice and good will.

"Tian'er, you don't need to be sad about that" He said

"B-But third brother did it for my own good! Yet I did such a thing to him, I deserved to be punished" Hou Tian cried even more

Hou Qing who walked over glanced at Hou Tian angrily, then at his father, with a fearful glint in his eyes.

"F-Father, I-"

"Th-Third brother, please forgive me, I shouldn't have wasted your good will, I'm sorry" Hou Tian cried out

Hou Qing fell silent at this remark as an idea appeared in his head

"Father, I truly only wanted to do it for fourth brother's health, but I let the anger get to my head and did such an unforgivable thing" Hou Qing said bitterly

Hou Tian stared at him dumbfounded, not because of his acting, but...

'Is his mind in the right place? This dumba*s is getting himself killed! He should have just admitted that he wanted to feed me that crap\, yet he's saying it's for my own good? Even a blind man can tell that thing is worse than sh*t\, and you're telling father you're doing it for me?'

'Acting wise, I give you eight out of ten, but your reasoning...no need to ask, you're failing it harder than my previous boss'

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