"Imagination is better than knowledge"-Albert Einstein...well at least its close to what he said, I'm not fond of the so called "great men" and their quotes, I'm not fond of anything that doesn't benefit me. Man was created to make choices of their own, but yet still we need to follow orders of our fellow "brothers and sisters" whom are higher in authority...but like I said before, none of that matters to me. To say when I had stop caring about anything around me would be difficult, because I try my best to forget my past to forget everything and everyone whom had done me wrong, and ever since then I've been asking myself a question that still lurks in my mind: "To Live, or to Die?". It is safe to say that it is easier to find a reason to die than of one to live, twelve rounds of bullets in the magazine of my gun on top of my desk, in the darkness of my room I thought to my self weather to live or to die every night, weather to make it next morning, or to let out greay and white matter and the thick red liquid out onto my wall, "It would be easy" I always think to myself "No more worries, problems, or the desire to find love" , but no matter how many times I've tried to pull the trigger, she always flashes on my mind, preventing me from freeing myself from this unforgivable world.

I don't remember what day...but it all started in my first junior year of high school, looking back it was kind of funny that the same day I found a reason to die, I also found a reason to live and her name, is Alesha Bissoon. It was my fist day in high school, I came early and took a seat in the back to not draw attention to myself, mostly because I was bad at starting a conversation and making friends, I kept a low head just not to create eye contact with anyone. Minuiyes flew by and the classroom started to fill up, I could already deal their eyes on me, I could hear them already starting to whisper about whom I was, how I look, how I smell, and most of all how I act. One of them started to approach me, but the entrance of the teacher saved me. First period, and the teacher thought that it would be a great idea to use this time to introduce ourselves, while introductions were taking place I chose to hide myself for a while, but of course it didn't work.

'Christian Alexander...is there a Christian Alexander in our presence?'

*Why call me now, he realizes that I dont want to be called but yet he still did...why cant teachers respect the wishes of their students?* As I was about to get up from my seat a knock came from the door

'You may enter!'

...And thats when I saw her, Alesha Bissoon!

Thinking back on that day...I really wished I stayed home. The image of her stuck in my mind, constantly thinking to myself am I good enough...was I ever good enough? Curly hair, long, black, curly hair, light gentle skin, soft lips and bold golden—brown eyes that could reach the deepest part of your soul. I could already hear the envious comments from the girls, and the lustful ones from the boys. I slowly took my seat as the teacher spoke to her.

"And why so late on the first day?"

"Sorry for not being punctual, but it was out of my control...it won't happen again" her response sounded cold and tiring, truly not fit for her looks.

"Well since you've cought everyones attention, and had a dramatic entrance at that, I guess it won't hurt for you to introduce yourself will it?" She was annoyed, but I won't intervene, its her problem she'll get herself out of it, which she did.

"I'm really tired at the moment, and I don't like doing introductions, as a teacher you should already know my information, as for the students,if anyone wants to know me they should come to me personally, instead of shouting my business in front of everyone" She walk pass the teacher and took the seat behind me. The teacher brushed it off and continued with the introductions.The first five periods has passed with the exchange of a few teachers along with the recess period. Lunch period, some of the students whom had promising friendships left for the cafeteria in groups while some stayed in the class to eat, I however needed to be alone so I walked out, pretending to go to the cafeteria I walked to the back of one of the buildings. The grass was neatly trimmed, a tall wall blocked the view of the outside, a thick lush mango tree stood in the center creating a shade for the birds that sat in its branches. I set up there, readying my mouth for home made meal, I opened the bowl and dipped the spoon, as it was about to enter my pallet, a familiar voice came from the other side of the tree.

"And here I was thinking I would of been here alone" I could of hear the bowl being opened. "Christian Alexander, is it?"

"Yes,..." The wind was the only sound for a moment.

"I might have portrayed a terrible character in the class...but to be honest I wasn't in the mood for anything t**oday" Wind.

"You're not going to pry?"

"Your business is yours" Wind. "But I do have one question"

"Yes?"

"What is your name?"

"My name...Alesha Bissoon" The wind blew slightly stronger...the hour passed without us saying another word to each other, at the time, I think all we wanted was to enjoy the silence and the rare feeling of having company, but it was broken by the bell.

"We should get back to class" she said calmly.

"We should..." I responded. But we never moved, we never knew when we will have that feeling again, we were afraid of leaving our comfort zone...but sadly, we had to. I took the lead and got up first.

"See you in class" I said while walking away.

"See you**..."

'Now I am become Death, destroyer of worlds'– J. Robert Oppenheimer

Life, life alone is a question...and one's life will end before knowing the answer to life itself, but can the question on life be answered...was it...meant to be answered, or should we just go by our day and pretend that we don't want any answers. I think I would rather go with the second option, because it was the driven thirst to get answers that made us have wars in the first place. Just because one has a different way of living the other thinks one doesn't belong in this world...but if we just took time and sat down to understand each other, to get to know the real reason why we do the things we do or live the way we live, would we have wars then?...or would the world have took a different turning point, would we have found the answers that we were looking for? I tried my best to understand others the day I enrolled in highschool...I tried my best...to understand her.

It was three days after we first met in the school, Saturday, 7am sunrise reflected off the water turning it into a crystal blue lake, early birds and morning winds interrupted the trees. I was practicing my manager drawings, on that particular day I was practicing backgrounds and sorroundings, but one particular detail was keeping entering the scene on the paper, a scene that wasn't in front of me, her.

"Wacha doin?" A familiar voice came from behind, I turned to see that it was just my friend Kyle, partner in crime from since kindergarten.

"Practicing."

"Any new characters?"

"No, just the same old ones"

"Bro..." He sat next to me. "You should really tell me when you're coming out here...being alone is lame and boring"

"I work better when I'm alone" I didnt lift my head once to look at him.

"Dude check it out, the ice queen from class"

"And whom is this ice queen of yours?"

"Bissoon" My head automatically flew up.

"Where?!" Kyle looked at me with an arch brow.

"So that caught your attention?...shes over there" He gestured to my right with a lift of his chin, I looked over and there she was, sitting on a bench, baggy hood and short jeans, hair down as usual, reading a book, and a Starbucks cup in her hand, I started calculating ways to approach her...course without Kyle involved, I slightly ajusted my head to see what she was reading...' Moby ****'?...at least it looked like it, I'll just try my luck.

"Stay here and guard my things"

"Where you're going?"

"None of your business" I walked away in a steady pace hoping for the best.

*Why am I so nervous...all I'm going to do is just say hi...that's all*

I could of felt Kyle's annoyance already.